Disclaimer – I do not own BMT world, it belongs to Trudi Canavan

Ready to Leave

In the two days since the High Lord's death, there had been an outburst of continuous activity at the Fort, but Sonea had not been involved with much of it. Meetings had been held, rumours circulated and for a time no-one was sure exactly what was going to happen. Sonea had seen little of Akkarin, mostly quick glimpses of him as he went into or came out of meetings. She was both relieved and annoyed at the same time over their lack of contact.

She had tried to keep hold of her anger, channelling it into a sort of shield to protect her from Akkarin's effect on her, but it had gradually subsided and left her with a dull feeling of emptiness. There was a compulsion to avoid him and, at the same time, seek him out, a sort of rubbing of salt into her wounds. The fact that he had not been visible since her meeting with him on Warriors' Walk had prevented her from resolving her chaotic feelings. That had not improved her temper at all.

She had also kept out of Kelda's way as much as she could because she couldn't trust herself not to snap at the Alchemist. She furiously told herself her whole time at Corres Fort had been spoiled by Kelda's involvement. If she had been able to simply join the procession, keeping herself merged in the group, only stepping outside it when she was needed to help Akkarin fight the Ichani, everything would have gone smoothly. Instead, she had been forced to have close contact with Akkarin, while masquerading as Jalette and the outcome of that had been both unsettling and hurtful. No, if Kelda crossed her path at the moment, Sonea thought savagely, she would be told a thing or two in no uncertain terms.

After half a day spent wandering around, avoiding any who seemed to want to stop and talk, Sonea found herself back on the Warriors' Walk. It was largely empty with only the patrolling King's Guard to disturb the peace. She found a corner where she could look out over the sea or, with a slight turn of the head, regard the goings on in the town, and settled down to think.

But her mind refused to cooperate and chaotic thoughts continued to run round and round in her head until she felt like screaming. She tried to concentrate instead on what sort of magic Akkarin had used to tap into the power within the wall, but try as she might, she couldn't discover how to do it. By the time she realised this, the ends of her fingers were sore from pressing against the stone and the sharp crystals had cut into her thumbs. As she sucked up the blood, she forced herself to become reconciled to the fact she would have to make do with the much slower method of crumbling the bits of stone she had discovered in the bathing area. She made a mental note to replenish her magic as soon as possible.

As her mind slowly calmed down, she became certain of one thing - she had to disappear on the way back to Imardin. She couldn't afford to wait until the procession returned to the capital before relinquishing her role as Jalette. As Sonea, she needed to emerge from her 'sickness' and be seen around the Guild before Akkarin and the others returned, especially if rumours of her presence in Corres Town began after the return. She had no way of knowing how successful her deceit had been. She didn't think anyone would make enquiries about her, given her current status in the Guild, but she couldn't be certain. No, it was the right thing to do, get back as soon as possible and be seen in the Dining Hall and the Night Room well before the others returned. Now all she had to do was to think of a way to make Jalette disappear in a feasible, but above all public manner.

She laughed quietly to herself. You do get into some difficult positions! But at least you have been resourceful enough to get out of them…so far.

She gradually became aware that someone was approaching her and turned to find Wilden only a few feet away. He was smiling as he came up next to her.

"So this is where you hide?" he murmured. "I wondered where you were."

She smiled in return, there was something quite attractive about the Warrior which made him comfortable to be with. It wasn't that he was handsome, but he was friendly, with a warm smile which made his eyes twinkle in a most fetching manner.

"Just trying to find a little peace, everywhere else is full of people rushing around."

Wilden came and stood next to her, "Yes, it's certainly a lot quieter up here."

There was silence for a moment, then Sonea asked the question which had been puzzling her since her return, "What happened to the Ichani fleet?"

"We stopped them. Lord Akkarin had made us practise feeding each other power to increase the strength of our strikes. Once we had the range, we were able to destroy them one after the other." Wilden's pride in the performance of Akkarin's Warriors was obvious.

"Lord Akkarin is very wise," Sonea said, not without some hidden amusement.

"Yes, he is," Wilden replied earnestly. "He has made us a strong fighting force in spite of the opposition from others."

She couldn't think of an answer to that without revealing her feelings, so she turned the conversation to more general things. They spent a pleasant half hour talking about nothing in particular and Sonea increasingly felt at ease with Wilden's charming manner. He reminded her very much of Lorlen, so comfortable to talk to. Not a bit like your tortuous conversations with Akkarin, her mind slyly reminded her.

"Well, I have things to attend to," the reluctance obvious in his tone. He took her hand and said softly, "I may not have an opportunity to speak with you again before we return, but I do hope I will see more of you back at the Guild."

Sonea was startled by his warm words accompanied by a tender gaze and didn't quite know how to respond. She stuttered a little which Wilden seemed to take as an example of her own tender feelings. He pressed her hand and smiled into her eyes, "I'm sure we will be able to spend some time together soon."

He hesitated, as if wanting to say more, but decided against it, turning from her and swiftly walking away.

She stared after him. What was it with Jalette? What was it about her which made men want to get to know her better? First Lorlen, then Akkarin and now Wilden. She could discount Lorlen, who at least was fond of the real Jalette. Perhaps she could exclude Akkarin too, in case he knew Jalette was really Sonea, but Wilden? He had no reason to think she was anyone other than the Healer who had treated him. Why was he attracted to her?

Jalette was pretty, Sonea could acknowledge that, especially when compared with her own features, but after all, she was simply clothing that Sonea wore. It is my words he listens to, my voice he hears. Perhaps it wasn't just Jalette after all but rather a mixture of Jalette's face and Sonea's personality.

"Now I know why it was not considered a good idea to impersonate by magic," she muttered to herself, recalling the strict rules the Guild taught its novices. "It's all too confusing when it comes to relationships!"

Deciding to put all thoughts aside, except the ones focusing on how she could extricate Jalette before reaching Imardin, Sonea went to have a bath and supplement her magic by stealing power from the Fort.

Word came later in the day that all those returning to Imardin should prepare for departure the following morning. The room Sonea shared was a scene of confusion as magicians tried to find all their possessions and get them ready for the servants to pack. Sonea was more organised and it didn't take her long to put her bundle on her bed.

She had begun to work out just how Jalette could remove herself from the procession, but it came at a price. She would need to expend a high degree of her power to sustain her plan. Already, maintaining Jalette's physical appearance took a lot of power. For her plan to work, she would need at least as much again.

She had decided to create an illusion, capable of moving among the procession and holding a public conversation. The illusion would be of a messenger sent to find Jalette and summon her home where her mother had had a relapse. The messenger would need to wait while Jalette made her excuses, and then ride off with her. The power drain would be enormous and as she had never attempted such a thing before, Sonea risked having her 'messenger' fade away under the eyes of dozens of magicians.

She took the opportunity of shutting herself away again in the bathing room where she crumbled as much of the stone as she could. By the time she had finished, it felt as if she had personally demolished several blocks of stone to extract the magic. She felt physically tired, but she could feel the heady rush as the power filled her magic source. Surely there was enough to Heal herself?

She used the merest trickle, just enough to take the edge off her fatigue. Although she still felt tired, at least she could cope with it. She looked at the gap where the stone she had crumbled had been. It was very noticeable, but there was little she could do to hide it without using more magic. She took one of her towels and wet it, then dropped it in the corner as if it had been used and forgotten. It covered most of the gap. Of course, a servant would be sent to clean all the accommodation as soon as they had left, and would discover the hole, but by then, she would be well on her way and out of reach of any interested questioners.

She went to bed early that evening, shortly after her evening meal. She was alone in the sleeping chamber as the others had gone somewhere, she hadn't really paid attention when they were discussing their plans. They were used to her unsocial habits by now and left her to her own devices, for which she was grateful. She didn't really know enough about Jalette to be able to hold a long conversation with people who had known the Healer for some years.

The next morning, they were wakened early by one of the servants. After a hurried breakfast, the magicians were assembled in the large reception room. The Fort Commander, who in Sonea's opinion looked rather relieved to be losing his guests, gave a short speech, wishing them well for the journey and offering again, his commiserations on the death of the High Lord. Then they all filed out into the courtyard.

Sonea watched Akkarin as he moved around, having a word here and there with various people. He was at his diplomatic best, smiling and chatting with every sign of ease. Even people who were hostile at first, succumbed to his charm and responded, if not with great warmth, at least with politeness. He spent quite a long time talking to Benin, who with his Warriors had constructed two large biers which they had loaded carefully onto carts. The bodies of the High Lord and the Administrator had been dressed in clean robes and laid on velvet palls, cushions beneath their heads. A shield had been constructed around them, protecting the bodies, but also allow them to be seen. Both looked peaceful, as their dreadful wounds were concealed by their robes.

Servants were busy loading possessions onto carts, each bundle carefully secured. Sonea admired their speed and the way they made things look easy. She could see that tents and other equipment familiar from their original journey were much in evidence, so she could look forward to a similar trip back to Imardin. Except, of course, she would never complete the journey as Jalette. She had firmed up her plan and now knew the exact point where her messenger would appear. She had chosen it because it would be easy to find her way back to Imardin along a quiet route, which would allow her to enter the city by one of the minor entrances.

She was relieved that her time as Jalette was coming to an end. It had been more demanding that she had realised when she originally thought of the idea. Impersonating another person for long periods would certainly not be her favourite plan in the future.

She stood with the others waiting for a servant to bring her horse. The sooner she was mounted, the sooner she could leave. She heard her name called and with a sinking heart, Sonea watched the stable boy lead Trouble over to her. As if she didn't have enough to worry about on the journey, she had that difficult horse to manage as well.