Chapter 44
AN: Hey children! Sorry for the delay, I got distracted. But I accidentally gave PJ fans more time to vote, BUT THEY DIDN'T ANYWAY! Official order for first three fics:
This one
SAO fic (I am thinking that it will be called to kill a god.)
Fire Emblem IF blind playthrough. (Where you see all of my stupid mistakes that I make on first playthrough.)
So yeah, this chapter is going to be fun. See yah on the other side.
The path to redemption was not going to be as easy as we had thought it was going to be. As soon as we got within viewing distance of the wall, I sent Gaius out to find out what the enemy's position was. He did not bring back good news.
"There are at least a hundred dark mages with Mire spells on that wall. Also, there are about five hundred archers." Holy fucking shit that is well defended. "Also, they have about 100 of these devices that I have never seen before… some sort of giant crossbow." Ballistae? Does the author truly hate me?
"This will be no easy feat certainly." I considered the predicament. "Unless we can exploit some sort of old escape route from the castle to infiltrate it, then I see no way in." I thought more. "Of course, that could take months to find. Even if we could find our way in, there is no guarantee that we would be able to escape the way that we came, or that the escape route won't be guarded." At that moment, an entourage of horsemen with the Valmese colors rode on through the gates. It appeared that they were on some sort of mission.
"What is going on there Stretch?" Gaius gestured at the open gate.
"I am guessing some sort of message. It could be something important, or it could be something that doesn't affect us at all." Erin tapped my left shoulder.
"How could it be something important?"
"It could be Walhart attempting to pull forces out of that keep, or it could be a request for supplies." Most of the guards left the walls. "Or it could be an opportunity." I heard a clearing of a throat behind us.
"Excuse me Noah." Zach prodded a prisoner. "I caught this one lurking outside of my base." The man was fairly short, with effeminate features that would rival Libra's He drew his long black hair back into a ponytail, which partially covered his silver axe on his back.
"Tell us barbarian." Zach jabbed a finger into his chest. "Who are you working for?"
"No one at the moment." He claimed with a voice that seemed familiar. "I am looking for a certain group to join however." Zach scoffed.
"As if! You are obviously bluff-"
"Marcus?" The line of inquiry changed my perspective. His voice sounded like a prepubescent version of Basilio's!
"Ah. Tulip was it?"
"Um…. It was Rose, Marcus." Rose's neck was red.
"Ah. Say Tulip, have you seen Severa?" Why do all the guys care about her? I mean, with Inigo it makes sense; he was the biggest philanderer until he was reunited with Ilithyia. (I thank Naga every day for her.) I decided I had to tell him.
"She is dead Marcus."
"A shame... That gets rid of the honor of me killing her myself." Marcus deadpanned. Well... That is excessive. "Anyway, why are you here?"
"Erm... We are rescuing the baby form of you." Erin nodded to the huge man.
"A cause close to my heart certainly." Marcus slapped his thigh. "If they thought they could keep me, then they can kiss my brown Feroxi Arse." He elbowed Rose with the proof that Basilio was his father. "Isn't that right Tulip?"
"I-I am not good enough to have an opinion..."
"You always say that Daisy." He has to be joking. "But you usually have good ideas."
"How did you expect to win in a fight with almost a thousand soldiers?"
"With strategic entry. Also, after today, there will only be 100 archers holding this position." Sure enough, right after he said that, the odds turned slightly in our favor. A large convoy of archers and mages filed out of the castle followed by the messengers. The other Archers that remained, waved back down on the trotting steeds and the jogging mages and archers. I looked over to Marcus.
"What did you say about strategic entry?" Marcus gravely walked over to one of the trees, and pulled up a layer of bark. Inside there was nothing but a passage that appeared to lead inside the castle.
"How convenient. The tree was pseudowood." Erin nodded sagely.
"Hmmm." Zach pondered this. "Pseudowood is fake wood... You mean like Viagra?" Everyone from this world looked slightly confused, but Erin and I let out a long drone of a groan.
"And with that," I clapped my hand on his shoulder. "You have volunteered to go first down the very ominous tree tunnel." Zach whitened with the thought.
"B-but it could put me in danger!"
"Should have thought of that before you told the dangerous joke." Erin then pushed him into the passage. Mercifully, he did not scream or cry, but he did pull Gaius and Erin down with him. I feel sorry for their landing. I waved my hand for the others to follow, and jumped in.
My head mercilessly whiplashed as I rolled down a set of stairs. I am not sure what I was expecting, this was a secret exit, not an entrance. Probably why it was stairs and not a slide. It was pitch black, so I could not see as I was battered by the sharp steps. When I finally rolled to a stop, I saw the group because of the torch Erin had lit.
"What is it looking like for this tunnel? Where is it headed?" I rubbed the pain out of my temples.
"Well." Erin cleared her throat. "It looks like it makes a beeline for the castle."
"Where specifically in the castle?" Zach gave a huge shit eating grin.
"How should I know? What do I look like? A fucking GPS?" Marcus came clomping down the stairs.
"I think this passage heads directly to Excellus' private rooms. That is most likely where baby me is located as well." Marcus pointed down the tunnel. "The others are going to arrive at this position in three...two...one." Surprisingly, he was half right. Olivia and Rose stepped off the last step in unison as Marcus said Zero.
"Where are Inigo and Illythia?" I asked my wife.
"They made it about halfway before they started sucking face." Two seconds passed before Erin and Gaius ran up the steps to interfere. Another twenty passed before they brought back the disgruntled couple.
"We were enjoying ourselves!" Inigo grabbed his girlfriend's hand.
"You can enjoy yourselves later; right now we have work to do." They grumbled a half hearted agreement to my suggestion. I pointed down the passage.
"We have to keep moving while the standing army is distracted." I moved my hand, and we began walking down the passage.
It was a good twenty minutes of a dirt passage with bugs and worms crawling everywhere. Good thing Lucina was not involved in this adventure, or else the passage may have collapsed from her screams. As it were, all of us were fairly relieved upon discovery of the passage's end. Marcus stood in front of us.
"My recommendation is for the men to go first." Erin and Olivia looked outraged, while Rose just looked indifferent. "It would be better to see if there is a trap of some sort waiting at the top." I considered Marcus, then the faces of the angry females.
"I think that only one of us should go up there Marcus, just to decrease the risk of major losses." Zach laughed at this.
"But who would be that disposable?" He continued laughing as everyone slowly turned to him. "Why are you all just staring at me… I just volunteered myself again. Damn."
We were waiting for the return of Zach after checking for traps. It had been twenty minutes since he left. Erin walked to my side.
"Should we just assume that he is gone?" I shook my head.
"Ten more minutes." I looked her in the eye. "Let's give him ten more-" Zach's voice came from above us.
"Hey guys! This room is huge! It took a while to search, but it is completely clear!" I knew he would be fine.
We all walked out of the tunnel into the giant room. All of us gasped in awe at the spectacle of it. We all wandered about staring at the majesty of the thirty foot tall painted ceiling, and the giant pillars coming out of the floor. When all three of the girls in our party were close together however, a cage that was not there before dropped down over their unsuspecting heads. A sick laughter sounded off from the corner.
"Welcome honored SLAVES!" He threw his head back. "Eee Hee Hee!" I hear that laugh in my nightmares along with Jean's face. I hope I can kill one of them today.
"What are you going to do with them?" Zach asked, pointing his finger at the woman who were being held captive. Excellus snickered again.
"Give them a choice."
"What choice could you come up with slug?" Gaius folded his arms across his chest.
"Have sex with me, or with the entire standing guard of this castle. Eee Hee Hee!" Inigo's entire body went slack, and his eyes went into a murk.
"Let. Ilithyia go." Excellus tauntingly held out his ear as if to listen.
"Or what? Will you scream and run around like the little child you are?" Inigo looked up and tilted his head to the side as he drew his sword.
"I'll kill you!" Inigo ran out of the pen like an enraged maniac. Gaius followed not too far behind.
"You committing types." Excellus got into a casting position. "Always thinking with your cock rather than your head!" He fired off a Bolagnoe, throwing Gaius and Inigo against the wall, knocking them out, and drawing screams from Erin and Illithyia.
"Oh shut up you whores." Excellus snarled in the direction of the cage. "Before I give you a reason to scream. Marcus tensed up, ready to pounce.
"Eee Hee Hee Hee!" Excellus started out a teleport, and a two year old Marcus appeared in his arms. "You looking for this guy?" He put his fingers in a mock gun against young Marcus' temple. "Come a step closer and he dies!" Marcus immediately drew back.
"I can't do it." Marcus muttered to me. Excellus gave him an evil chuckle.
"You just don't have the BALLS to do anything!" Marcus gave him an evil glare. "I should know! I am the one who cut them off!" Marcus' glare intensified with a look that would murder the toad a thousand times, each more painful than the last.
That was when I realized what Excellus had done to him. He had turned Marcus into a Eunuch, with the result being Marcus' effeminate looks, and prepubescent face. He never got any testosterone. Not only that, but in this world that would ruin your life. There is a reason why Eunuchs usually stay with the people who emasculate them, not because they felt some sort of loyalty, but because Eunuchs are considered scum, and criminals. Marcus might be one of the bravest men I have ever seen. Marcus looked to me, and pulled a tomahawk off of his belt. It flew end over end into Excellus' arm. A moment later, Excelus' hand was trying to pull out the Tomahawk out. The boy was released.
"Now is your chance!" The boy ran to Marcus, but Excellus pulled out the Bolagnoe tome, and knocked out the Marcuses. He then turned to me.
"Guess it is just you and me." He pointed a finger at me, but Micah's fire came out. I charged forward, leaving a scorching flame at my back. I then noticed him switch again into an arcfire. The flames flew out, and I knew I had no time to dodge. I pulled my shield out to block the flames. It was able to do so, but I flew back, and hit my head. My vision was swimming with pain, but I was still able to move. I immediately played dead on the ground as Excellus approached the cage.
"Eee Hee Hee Hee." He looked over the women with lustful eyes. "Who wants to go first?" A resounding silence filled the room as Excellus' grin grew wide.
"Fine. I can pick. Einee meanie miney... You. With the demon mask. Take it off now."
"No one deserves that. Not even you."
"Take it off yourself, or you will have a much worse punishment."
"I am not scared of anything that you could possibly do to me." The tone of her voice told me she actually was scared, but Excellus apparently did not notice.
"I never said I would do anything to you." Excellus pointed his finger at Marcus. Rose's eyes went wide under her mask.
"Don't you dare!" It was surprising how quickly he read our party, including Rose's apparent affection towards Marcus.
"Then take off the mask." I stood up, and snuck towards Excellus. The girls looked at me funny, but I gave them a motion to keep him busy.
"No!" Rose shouted from my prompting. Excellus shook his finger in Marcus' direction.
"Last chance. Take off the mask." I snuck closer to the toad.
"NO!" Excellus sighed.
"Fair enough." He spun back towards me, and fired off a thoron. At this range, it was fast. Due to my training however, I was able to get my false shield arm up to block. It shattered in the clatter of steel shards and smoke. I heard Rose gasp, and Liv cry out in desperation. I heard Excellus laugh as I charged through the smoke and stabbed Excellus in his open throat.
"Never threaten my family again, in life, or death." As I said this, I felt a blade go through the right side of my stomach. It was basically a crit from a bronze sword to put it in game terms.
"If I am going down, you are going down with me" Excellus' eyes glinted as he coughed blood onto my face. "Eee Huegh..."He then fell to the ground, wrenching Donny from my grip. I staggered towards the cage door, pulled Donny out of Excellus' throat, and broke the latch on the gate. After that, the edge of my vision turned red. I felt my arm, and realized then that the strike from the Thoron opened the wounds on my arm once more. I was bleeding out of two places at once. Erin recognized the severity of my condition, and immediately made a beeline for me. My vision was fading to black, and my ears were ringing. I saw Erin and two thirds of my family leaning over to examine my wounds. I then passed out.
AN: Well… that was a pretty heavy chapter-
I didn't get to even read it yet I'm still going to comment on it. Uh... SHIT GOT REAL.
… Why are you here Dusted with Stars?
I'm a magical potato. I can do whatever I want.
Ladies and gentlemen, for those of you who are not aquainted, this is Dusted With Stars. Another one of my amazing author friends who is sadly not a part of this Fiction.
I got called amazing! I FEEL SPECIAL! And yes, I would probably wreck everyone's shit, so it's a good thing I'm not involved.
Yeah, this is not something where OP ness is not really involved.
But you're pretty OP... But okay...
One arm. I get injured almost every time I fight. I barely survive on a chapterly basis.
But you still persevere on... You are OP.
Who do you think I am? George RR Martin? I am not one to kill off main characters… *Looks back to chapter 8* Most of the time.
*cough* Donny, Ricken and Frederick *cough*
Be that as it may, how could we do the SAO sequel if I died?
Jean would be the main character. He can screw everyone over.
I always knew you liked Jean better than me…. :(
NUH! I like you, Boos. But I have a thing for evil guys. It's fun to see them mess with people.
He is dating Erin's alternate. Ricken is dead, and Henry is with Nowi right Nowi.
I didn't mean I liked him! I just liked his character. Oh yeah, you killed Ricken and paired my hubby off. EXCUSES!
Any final thoughts before I post this?
Uh… READ MY SHIT! And that's about it. Wait, I have to name my shit... Impossible Flowers and Vivid Memories.
Good stuff. Anyway, F-
Follow, review or fav, or whatever you do with Boos's story.
Why do they always steal that?
Revenge, my dear Boos. Revenge. I shalt not forgive the insult of having my hubby be paired off and not being able to wreck Jean's shit.
Didn't you pair Chrom and Olivia in Impossible Flowers?
Inigo looks better *cough* hot *cough* with blue hair.
Than make his dad a blue haired Avatar… wait a second.
Nuh. It's a RobinxInigo story. Besides, Chrom. And. Olivia. I don't like the pairing (YOU JUST MET HER) but, uh,
REVENGE! ...And blue haired Inigo...
*Sigh* GOODBYE!
