A/N: Hey everyone! So sorry, I really did mean to get this up sooner but I had a hard time with this chapter. Apologies. Also, I'll be starting school this week (ugh), so that may affect my updating in the future. As much as I love writing for you guys, my education does come first ;)
Anywho, enjoy this chapter :D
Rain was falling in thunderous torrents as Rose dodged through the crowds making their way up and down Diagon Alley. Pulling up the hood of her jacket to keep her hair dry, she kept her eyes trained on the signs hanging above each store she passed. She had to squint to see through the downpour, but she eventually spotted Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour.
Ducking through the doorway, Rose threw back her hood and searched the crowded store. It didn't take long for her to find Allison seated at a table in the back, beckoning for her to come over. Rose burst into a grin at the sight of her friend, and returned the wave heartily. Within seconds, the two girls were embracing.
"I've missed you so much." Allison exclaimed as she pulled away and eyed Rose up and down.
"I can't believe we didn't get together at all this summer." Rose remarked as they slid into their respective seats.
"Well, I was traveling quite a bit." Allison reminded her.
"True," Rose agreed. "Which reminds me, I want to hear all about Paris!" Allison chuckled.
"Alright," she replied. "But only after you tell me when you got that beautiful haircut."
"About a week ago." Rose answered, smiling as she fingered her freshly-cut locks. The dark red hair that had once come midway down her back now only fell to her shoulders. Rose had decided it was time for a change, although the scorching heat of the summer had done most of the convincing for her.
"It looks lovely." Allison responded, throwing in a friendly wink.
"Thanks." Rose murmured.
"Oh, and I never asked Albus how the party at Malfoy's went." Allison added, her voice sounding slightly strained, as if even mentioning Scorpius' name upset her.
Rose hesitated, then noticed the look of regret in her friend's bright blue eyes. It was clear that Allison was at least trying to be courteous, if nothing else. She was a bit late on that front, of course, considering what Rose was about to tell her. Drawing in a deep breath, Rose prepared herself. She hated the idea of lying to one of her closest friends, but it was necessary if she wanted the plan to work out.
"Not well, I'm afraid." She replied quietly, glancing down at the table and drumming her fingers lightly against the glass. Rose could sense the immediate unease emanating from her friend.
"What happened?" Allison queried in a concerned tone. Again, Rose paused briefly to gather her thoughts, struggling to put them into words.
"Scorpius and I…well…w-we're finished." Rose answered slowly, trying to inject as much sorrow into the statement as she could.
"Finished?" Allison repeated, her eyes wide in shock. "Finished as in…?"
"Finished as in we aren't friends anymore." Rose explained, chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully. Little to her surprise, a furious look dawned on Allison's face.
"That disgusting, good-for-nothing git!" She growled, her hands forming fists atop the glass table.
"Allison, I really don't –"
"No, Rose." Allison interjected, holding up her hand to stop her from speaking. "He hurt you, and he's going to pay for it. You just wait until I get my hands around his filthy neck."
"Allison, I just want to forget about it." Rose responded in a resigned voice. "I'm alright, really." Allison didn't seem convinced.
"You two were thick as thieves for nearly five years, and now you're suddenly not?" she replied skeptically. "I won't ask you why if you don't want to talk about it, but I daresay that you're far from alright."
"Then I don't want to talk about it." Rose harrumphed, her eyes narrowing. The twins and Albus had both advised her to steer clear of anything too detailed when breaking 'the news' to Allison. Although Rose hadn't been sure if Allison would settle for so little information, she had reluctantly agreed to her friends' proposition.
"Well, if you need someone to go beat him up, you know where to find me." Allison riposted gently, seeming to sense Rose's discomfort. Rose merely nodded in response.
Allison then offered to go get their ice cream for them, leaving Rose by herself momentarily. As her friend sauntered off to the front counter, Rose let out a deep breath. Allison had bought it. She had believed the story, however flimsy it may have been. Now came the hardest part;
Living the lie she had just told.
A shroud of darkness seemed to settle over Malfoy Manor. The hallways were darkened with shadows of gloom, and even the sunlight shining through the windows couldn't seem to penetrate them. The very presence of Lucius had made the walls seem to grow closer, and the rooms shrink smaller and smaller.
With every footstep, Draco felt as if his father was trailing only inches behind him, watching and waiting for him to make a mistake. It was a feeling he knew all too well. It was the feeling of being slowly suffocated, with the life being drained from your soul day by day.
Draco hated to admit it, but the fear was back. The incessant terror that had always lingered somewhere in the recesses of his mind, even when Lucius was absent, had finally returned. It mocked him, taunting him with every surge of trepidation pulsing through his veins.
And with that fear came anger; a rage unlike anything Draco had ever known. It pounded inside his head every time he saw Scorpius cower in fear at the sight of Lucius. It roared inside his chest with every worried glance from Astoria. Draco hated knowing that he was too much of a coward to stand up to his father. He hated the power Lucius had over him. He had always hated it, of course, but that hatred had grown stronger over time. Now it was nearly too much to take.
The night before Scorpius left for Hogwarts was when it finally bubbled its way to the surface. Dinner had been the usual awkward affair, and Scorpius had escaped up to his room soon afterwards. Astoria stayed behind to help the maids clean up while Draco and Lucius moved to the sitting room.
The atmosphere was laced with tension as Draco flopped down carelessly into his armchair by the fireplace. Lucius, as per usual, poured himself a glass of brandy and paced throughout the room. Neither said anything, and Draco decided to enjoy the silence while it lasted. He gazed into the fireplace, watching absent-mindedly as the flames licked hungrily at the bricks surrounding them.
Draco could feel his father's eyes on him, almost as if Lucius was expecting him to say something. Frowning resolutely, Draco kept his lips sealed shut. If there was something his father wanted to discuss, he could bring up the subject himself.
At the sound of footsteps approaching, Draco finally took his eyes off of the fireplace and glanced over his shoulder to see Astoria striding into the room. Her forest green sundress swished elegantly around her knees as she walked towards them, although Draco could detect the frustration hidden behind her strained smile. Lucius had only been back for a few days, and Draco could already tell that he was starting to drive Astoria insane.
"Ah, Astoria." Lucius spoke up, finally breaking the silence. Draco felt a shiver run down his spine at the cool, threatening tone of his father's voice.
"Lucius." Astoria replied tartly. Draco reluctantly stood to his feet, turning around to watch as Lucius approached Astoria.
"I never did ask whether you ended up with a scar or not." Lucius went on in a mocking tone, reaching out and brushing aside Astoria's ebony locks to reveal the thin pink scar left behind from his own attack years earlier.
Draco stiffened, his hands balling into fists as Astoria flinched, shying away from Lucius's brazen touch. He wanted nothing more than to walk up to his father and knock his teeth out, but he knew this was a test. Lucius was seeing what it would take for Draco to break, and he knew that Astoria was the key. More importantly, he was showing Draco what he was willing to do to reach his goals.
"You get your hands off of me." Astoria spat in a low voice, surprising both Draco and Lucius. Raising his eyebrows, Lucius continued to glare down at her.
"Still just as feisty, I see." He murmured, thoughtfully trailing his finger down her scar. Draco felt a surge of rage starting to bubble inside of him. "It'd be such a shame if I had to add any more marks to such a face now, wouldn –"
Before Lucius could finish, however, Astoria broke away from his hand and landed a heavy slap across his face. Draco watched in shock as Lucius staggered backwards, reeling from the unexpected blow. His father's stoic face contorted into an enraged expression, and within seconds, his wand was suddenly drawn and pointed directly at Astoria.
"I think it's time you learned your place, you mewli –"
Before Draco even knew what he was doing, he found himself practically running forward and shoving Lucius away from Astoria, whose green eyes had widened in surprise and fear.
"That's enough, Lucius." Draco interrupted in a bristling, seething tone, grabbing his father by the front of his perfectly-ironed robes and slamming him back against the wall. He couldn't explain it, but he had never felt this angry before. This fury that burned inside him was unlike anything he had ever known. His body was trembling with rage, his hands shaking even as they pinned Lucius against the wall. "If you ever touch her again, I swear you'll be a dead man." Draco growled in the most threatening voice he had ever heard himself use. To his surprise, Lucius only laughed, the sound grating against Draco's eardrums.
"We both know you could never do that." His father retorted, his grey eyes sharper than steel as they pierced into his son's. "You've always been a coward, Draco." The words spewed out of Lucius's mouth effortlessly, and Draco flinched at their bluntness.
"So is that what all this is?" He exclaimed, his voice laced with rage. "Punishment?" Draco's grip on Lucius's robes tightened as he continued. "Is all this just some form of sick punishment because I was never good enough for you?"
"This is for our family, Draco." Lucius answered, seemingly shocked at the suggestion. "I'm doing this so our family can retain its honor." Draco scowled as Lucius continued. "And you won't stop me, Draco."
"And why would you say that?" Draco queried in a low tone. Again, Lucius let out a harsh laugh that echoed throughout the room, sending a shudder through Draco's body.
"Because you're weak." He replied. Draco swallowed hard. To his shock, his father suddenly swung his hand out, striking him across the face. Draco stumbled backwards, a sharp pain spreading through his cheek. Lucius, however, wasn't finished, and he reluctantly listened as his father went on. "You're weak, and you always will be." Lucius continued in a withering tone. "I still have some hope left for Scorpius, but I have none left for you. For that reason, I know you won't stop me. Because you can't stop me."
Draco closed his eyes, desperate to block out the voices inside his head that were agreeing with Lucius. He absent-mindedly rubbed his throbbing cheek, still surprised at the blow. His heart was slamming inside his chest, his pulse racing as the familiar terror and trepidation began to return, his sudden spout of rage fading. His mind, unable to conjure up a response, seemed to collapse, giving in to Lucius.
"Look…" Draco began after a moment of tense silence, instantly hating how pleading his voice sounded. "Do whatever you want to me, but leave her out of this." Lucius gave both him and Astoria a pitying look, shaking his head ruefully.
"Your love for her is pathetic." He responded, spitting out the word 'love' as if it were meaningless. Draco could sense Astoria stiffening behind him. He fumed inwardly, stepping forward until he was once again only inches away from his father.
"It's what keeps me alive." Draco answered through gritted teeth. "So you stay away from her."
"All I ask for is obedience, son." Lucius replied tartly. "Grant me that, and your 'beloved' will be safe." Not even bothering to wait for an answer, Lucius brushed past Draco, disappearing from the room with an ominous swirl of his black cloak.
His words repeated endlessly inside of Draco's mind as he pondered the offer his father had just made. Of course, it wasn't as much of an offer as it was a threat of what would happen if Draco or Scorpius dared to defy Lucius. Draco knew this had been meant as a warning; a warning he had no choice but to heed.
Slowly pivoting around, Draco tentatively met the gaze of Astoria. Her green eyes were wide with shock, brimming with tears. Draco opened his mouth to say something, but nothing seemed right. No words could justify the cowardice she had just been forced to witness. He should have told Lucius that he had had enough. He should have hit his father back, showing him that he wasn't weak after all. But in truth, Lucius had only proved himself right; Draco was a coward.
Astoria stepped towards him, but Draco couldn't face her any longer. Instead, he dragged his gaze away, then turned around and made for the exit leading into the foyer. He could hear her calling after him, imploring him to return, but Draco continued nonetheless.
Striding into the foyer with heavy footsteps, he threw open the door and walked out into the night, slamming the door shut behind him.
Astoria glided quietly up the stairway, her hands trembling as they held on to the railing for support. As soon as she had made it up the stairs, then down the hall to her bedroom, she closed the door, leaning back against it. Opening her mouth slightly, she let in the air that her lungs so desperately needed.
After catching her breath, Astoria walked heavily to the bathroom, slipping out of her shoes and striding onto the cold, white tiles with bare feet. The chill swept over her body as she leaned against the counter. Her hands grasped the edge as if her life depended on it, her nails scraping the light grey marble.
Raising her weary head, Astoria stared sullenly at the reflection that greeted her. Her emerald eyes were laden with unshed tears, her lightly tanned cheeks still burning from where Lucius had touched them. With shaking fingers, she gently pushed her black hair behind her ears.
Eyeing herself up and down, Astoria felt a rush of sorrow roll over her. She had lost weight. The dress that had once fit her perfectly now hung loosely around her thin frame. The stress and worry had been eating away at her for the past few months, with the return of Lucius never seeming to fade from her mind. Despite her constant utterances of assurance to Draco, Astoria knew that everything wasn't going to be alright. It would seem, in fact, that the opposite had been proved true tonight.
Astoria couldn't recall ever seeing Draco so angry before in all of her life. The rage festering inside of his grey eyes had nearly shaken her to the core. To think that she had been the cause of that rage only made it worse. Astoria didn't want to think about what her husband would do if something ever did happen to her, but she knew it wouldn't be good.
Unable to hold her own gaze, Astoria dragged her bare feet back across the tile floor and exited the bathroom. Walking up to the bed resting against the back wall, she sunk down on the edge of the mattress and glanced sideways at her nightstand. A small pile of jewelry sat atop the dark cherry wood, and Astoria spotted a familiar sparkle from within the jumble of chains and pendants. Her fingers darted into the pile and pulled out a thin, sterling-silver chain that held a single pendant; the north star. Smiling softly to herself, she clutched the necklace to her chest and shakily stood to her feet again.
She barely it three feet away before collapsing to the floor, her feet refusing to carry her anymore. Pushing her back up against the wall, Astoria pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her chin in between them.
The tears finally began to trickle down her cheeks, and Astoria made no move to stop them. She cried for herself. She cried for Draco. But most of all, she cried for Scorpius; her precious son. She hated to think of him growing up like this. It sickened her to think of Lucius's controlling grasp on her son, knowing that he was being forced into this life of what felt like slavery.
Astoria didn't know how long she sat there. She lost all track of time. She figured it must have been a while, however, when the door to the room opened and Draco walked in.
He looked terrible. His pale blonde locks were disheveled and messy, his clothes rumpled. His grey eyes were bloodshot, his irises rimmed with red. Astoria felt something inside of her ache at the sight of her husband. Before her stood a man who looked as if he had suffered a thousand millennia inside of a few short years, his hair touched with gray too early and his heart scarred too much for someone of only 41 years.
Draco didn't say anything at first; he merely gave Astoria a long look, then slowly walked over and sat down beside her. They sat in silence for a few moments, neither daring to speak or even glance at each other. Finally, Astoria couldn't take the deafening quiet any longer.
"Did you mean it?" she asked, sensing the instantaneous confusion radiating from Draco.
"Did I mean what?" he queried. Astoria bit her lip, hesitating before answering.
"When you said your love for me was what kept you alive." She responded quietly, swiveling her head around to gauge his reaction. A single gaze into Draco's ashen eyes told her everything she needed to know.
"What do you think?" he replied without a hint of hesitation. Astoria's heart seemed to both swell and deflate simultaneously. The thought that Draco really loved her that much took her breath away, but the idea that it really was the only thing keeping him alive concerned her greatly.
"If you love me, then why don't you fight him?" Astoria found herself asking. Draco glanced away, a troubled expression etched across his face.
"If I fight him, then he'll hurt you." He answered simply, pausing before eventually dragging his wayward gaze back to hers. "And the only thing that scares me more than Lucius is the thought of losing you." The pained look lingering behind his eyes made Astoria's stomach clench.
"This isn't about being safe." She riposted. "And this isn't about me, either. It's about Scorpius. It's about our son, Draco. Do you really want him to live like this? For Merlin's sake, he leaves for Hogwarts tomorrow and he can't even talk to the girl he loves because your grandfather thinks it would be improper!"
"You think I want this?" Draco exclaimed. "You think I enjoy seeing my own son not being able to live the life he wants? You think I enjoy the feeling of terror I feel every time I see Lucius within a foot of either you or him? Do you really think this is what I want?" Astoria swallowed hard, taken aback by his sudden harshness, although he clearly regretted the tone.
"Then maybe we should put a stop to it." She suggested softly, reaching for his hand and gently wrapping her fingers around his. Draco sighed, leaning his head back against the wall.
"I can't." They were only two words, but they were spoken in a voice so quiet and broken it sent an ache pulsing through Astoria's chest. "I can't stop him." Draco repeated in a helpless tone. "I'm not strong enough."
"Yes, you are." Astoria replied. Draco stared back at her, his grey eyes glimmering sadly.
"I'm not." He argued. "I can't do it, Astoria." Unable to think of a response, Astoria looked down at the floor. She hated seeing Draco like this. It pained her to see him suffer so.
After another minute or so of silence, he finally spoke again: "I should never have married you."
"What?" Astoria exclaimed, turning back to him in shock.
"I shouldn't have brought you into this life." He replied in a mournful tone. "I was foolish to think I could protect you from him."
"I can look after myself." Astoria responded assuredly, although she could feel her skin tingle at the memory of Lucius slicing open her cheek.
"You shouldn't have to." Draco retorted. "I'm your husband; it's my bloody job to protect you. And I can't even do that."
"Draco –" Astoria began, only to be interrupted.
"You deserve so much better than this." Draco interjected, looking away as his eyes filled with tears.
"Draco, look at me." Astoria murmured, watching as he drew in a shaky breath before finally turning back to face her again. "I chose this life." She began in the most earnest voice she could muster. "I chose this life, and I chose you." Astoria paused as a few tears slid down Draco's cheek. She bit her lip, holding back her own. "And if I had to go back, I would do it all over again." Draco hesitated before replying.
"I…I'm sorry." He whispered. "I'm so sorry." With his voice cracking on the last syllable, Draco glanced away once more.
Astoria placed a hand on his shoulder, then carefully climbed over onto his lap. Cupping his cheek gently in her free hand, she forced his gaze back onto hers. She held out her other hand, unraveling her clenched fingers to reveal the star-pendant necklace still sitting in her palm. Her eyes flicked upwards in time to see Draco's mouth drop open slightly.
"Do you remember what you promised me when you gave me this?" she asked. Draco swallowed, then nodded slowly as he clearly struggled to hold back more tears.
"I promised you I would love you until the day I died." He answered. Astoria smiled ever so slightly.
"And do you remember what I promised you?" she inquired. Draco stared into her eyes for a moment, his own shimmering with wonder.
"Astoria…" he replied quietly, pulling her closer so her forehead rested against his.
"I promised you I was never going to give up on you again." Astoria responded. "And I still stand by that promise today." She paused, pulling away a few torturous inches to look him in the eye once more. "I know you don't think you're strong enough. I know you hate yourself for not looking after me the way you want to. I know you wish Scorpius had a better life. I know, believe me. But I'm not giving up on you, Draco, because I know somewhere inside of you, you have the strength to do what's right." Her husband gazed at her in silent surprise, and Astoria ran her thumb over his tear-stained cheek, wiping away the dampness.
"I don't think I can find the strength on my own." He remarked, avoiding her gaze momentarily.
"Then we'll find it together." Astoria assured him, and Draco slowly swung his grey eyes back to hers.
In response, he reached out and dug his fingers into her hair, gently pulling her into a soft, tender kiss. It only lasted a few mere seconds, but in those seconds, everything that needed to be said was said. When they pulled back, Astoria felt a shudder pass through both of them.
"I love you." Draco murmured, his voice a breathless whisper against her lips. Astoria smiled.
"I know."
A/N: So yeah, that may or may not have been a Star Wars reference at the very end… Juuuuust sayin'.
Anyway, sorry if that was too sappy or angsty or whatever. And I know Scorpius wasn't in this one, other than a few mentions, but he'll be back next chapter! As always, thanks for reading, sorry for the delay, and I'd love it so much if you'd leave a review if it's not too much trouble and let me know what you think! I would leave a longer author's note but it's like 2 in the morning and I'm exhausted. So, peace out, Potterheads! See y'all next chapter!
