They had been driving for almost couple of hours when they decided to take a stop at a gas station. Komaeda parked the car and glanced at Hinata. Most of their travel had gone in comfortable silence, other than occasional conversation about the scenery of the sea next to them or talk about what they were going to do in Niigata, but Komaeda couldn't help but feel that the silence was a bit difficult to handle. It had seemed like Hinata had been deep in thought, so while the silence had been calm it also felt like Komaeda wasn't able to even break it, making it feel a bit weird.
"Hinata-kun?" Komaeda asked after he had turned the car off. Hinata turned to look at him quickly, like he had been surprised by the question, before smiling awkwardly.
"Ah, yeah. Sorry, I was kind of in thought," he said apologetically as he began to get out of the car. Komaeda just nodded and got out of the car as well, feeling a bit tense. He had no idea what Hinata was thinking about, and even though he knew he probably shouldn't try to intrude and guess what the other was thinking about, his mind kept wandering.
Hinata had said that he was happier that they were on the move again, but Komaeda couldn't help but think Hinata was feeling mixed about it. Of course, the other wanted to keep heading north but it was obvious that Oogami and Asahina would have been a lot better company than Komaeda was. He felt his stomach twist as they began to walk towards the gas station.
Hinata had said… a lot of things last night, things Komaeda thought the other would never say after what he had done, and that thought was making him think that maybe Hinata had thought about leaving back then. That those might have been just polite words to help Komaeda feel better even if he had left… But maybe Hinata had decided otherwise, thinking that he might have been a bother to the other two.
Since Komaeda was the only other one who knew about the world ending… and taking use of his money was the smartest thing to do. There wasn't really any other reason why Hinata would have chosen someone like him over Asahina and Oogami. Not any that he could think of, at least.
As soon as they entered the gas station, Hinata wandered towards the bathroom as he usually did. Komaeda walked to the magazine rack, starting to browse through one magazine absentmindedly. The magazine that had had the article about Enoshima wasn't there, much to Komaeda's relief. He didn't have to worry about Hinata ending up seeing it…
Enoshima… He still wanted to find out more about her, but he felt like Hinata would be upset if he found out. After all, he was snooping in the other's background. But if he found out more, he would be able to more of use for Hinata… He really didn't know what was the right thing to do; everything felt like it was the bad option.
And it made him think what someone socially more adept like Asahina would do in this situation… If he just could be like her, then maybe he would be able to make Hinata smile more, like he had smiled yesterday.
He pressed his lips together as he tried to shake off these thoughts. Thinking of what if's wouldn't make things any better. He wasn't like that and couldn't be like that, no matter how much he tried.
"Komaeda?" Hinata's voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he quickly smiled as he turned to look at Hinata.
"Should we buy some snacks? We still have some left but it seems like it's better to keep a bigger stock of them, just in case," Komaeda began to ramble on, keeping the smile up. He didn't want to sully the mood again after Hinata had been finally cheered up. Especially when he had been the one to cause the mood to get so weird in the first place.
"I guess? It's not like we have anything in the backseat anyways, so I suppose it doesn't matter to fill it with food," Hinata said as they walked to the snack shelves. Well, probably eating nothing but snacks was bad but it was only for emergencies, Komaeda reasoned as they began to get the snacks they wanted.
Compared to the beginning of their journey, it seemed to be a lot easier for Hinata to decide what he wanted now, making it easier. And he had stopped worrying about the money too, now that Komaeda had explained why there was nothing to worry about it in regards to it. It made him think that maybe it should have been better to explain it from the beginning but… He didn't really want to ramble on about himself, and he didn't know what information was actually useful to share.
After they had decided on all the snacks they were going to buy, they carried all of it to the cashier who seemed confused by the amount of it, but didn't say anything. Hinata packed them into bags while Komaeda paid, and when Komaeda was done and turned to him, Hinata gave him one of the bags.
"Here," he said and Komaeda nodded, taking the bag while Hinata carried the another. Carrying the shopping bags like this felt a bit homely, and Komaeda pressed his lips together as he tried to fight against the feeling of happiness. He shouldn't think about stuff like that…
They put the bags into the backseat of the car before seating themselves. Komaeda got out of the car soon, after driving to the gas pump, and began to refill the car. The smell of the gas lingered in the air and he glanced at Hinata inside of the car. Hinata had taken the phone out in the meantime, but Komaeda couldn't really see what he was doing.
He filled the car up and returned to the car, but unlike he was expecting, Hinata didn't put the phone away or didn't even try to hide what he was doing. Apparently he was writing an email to someone. Maybe it was okay to ask about it since Hinata wasn't trying to keep it a secret…
"Are you sending a message to someone?"
"Ah, yeah. I exchanged contact info with Asahina, and she already sent me a mail…," Hinata explained, before lifting his eyes to Komaeda. "Oh, sorry for doing that without asking you. It is your phone and your info at all…," he sounded a bit worried, and Komaeda smiled and shook his head.
"No, you can do what you want with it, I don't mind. I never used it much anyways, so it might as well be your phone now," he said. The only one who really messaged him ever had been his ex and occasionally Kirigiri about work, so there wasn't much use of it for him now since he didn't really have any need to contact anyone either.
"Well, I don't think it would be right to call it mine either. Asahina asked for both of our contact info after all, and I just told her this one should be enough… So isn't it more like we're sharing it? So it's ours," Hinata pondered aloud, and Komaeda pressed his lips together. There wasn't anything wrong in what Hinata had said but he felt a bit awkward about saying "ours"... In a sense, everything was his but in his mind, everything he had was considered Hinata's because he didn't feel any attachment to any of it, and he wanted to give as much as he could to Hinata.
Maybe that meant everything he had was both of theirs now, but… thinking like that made him just feel shy.
"The sea was kind of pretty at first, but one gets kind of bored looking at it after a while…," Hinata said, sounding bored as he stared out of the window. Komaeda chuckled a bit.
"Yeah, the novelty of it runs out after some time…," Komaeda answered. "Well, we will arrive in Niigata soon so we get to see something else." They had been talking a lot more now, mostly Hinata asking Komaeda questions Asahina had asked from him and the few conversations that had sparked from those questions.
"Will we go eat right away?" Hinata asked, turning away from the window to face forward.
"If you're hungry." Komaeda shrugged, and Hinata glanced at him.
"I mean, I've been eating snacks this whole time, so I guess it's better to ask if you're hungry since you haven't eaten," he protested, and Komaeda pursed his lips. He was pretty used to eating only once or twice a day back in Kyoto, so he didn't really get hungry often. He hesitated for a moment, before explaining the same to Hinata. Hinata was quiet for a moment, and Komaeda felt a bit nervous.
"Well, let's go eat then," Hinata decided eventually, and Komaeda sighed in relief. It felt so much easier to have the other decide… They began to discuss what they were going to eat after they had checked into their hotel. Luckily the hotel had been understanding about their circumstances, since originally they had been supposed to check in yesterday. The room had even had vacancy so that they still could stay the two nights they had planned on.
"Can we go to the beach at some point?" Hinata asked, and Komaeda looked at him in surprise.
"I thought you were tired of the sea?"
"Well, I'm tired of looking at it from a car," he said. "But I would still like to go on a walk on the beach. If it's okay with you." Hinata glanced at Komaeda, and he smiled.
"Of course it is. We can go after we've eaten, if you want?" he asked and Hinata just nodded, sinking in his seat to an apparently more comfortable position. Komaeda smiled softly as he kept looking at Hinata for a little while, before turning his attention back to the road.
Not long anymore.
Thank you so much for reading all the way here~ I'm sorry if the chapter felt short, the next one should be longer! The next chapter will be up on 10th of November as the normal schedule, I hope to see you there!
