A love lost and loves sacrifice.

Chapter 50.

The painful truth.

Holding the palms of her hands up in surrender Kathryn insisted "B'Elanna, it's not what you think." as she too stood to face the very angry looking half-klingon and trying to defuse the situation.

"Want to start telling me what it is then?" growled the half-klingon with her deep brown eyes blazing with anger and her teeth bared at the now rather flustered bride.

Tom jumped to his old friends defence and stood up to his wife saying "Lanna don't blame it on Kathryn, not on her wedding day."

With a heavy sigh B'Elanna's heart sank at her husbands words, she didn't want to ruin the long awaited and much anticipated wedding day, turning to her husband who she loved very much she asked in a slightly more gentler tone of voice "Tell me one thing Tom, were you and I married when you and she were in this relationship."

Tom glanced quickly from B'Elanna to Kathryn who was watching him closely for his answer; giving Kathryn an awkward look and slowly turning back to his wife he stumbled as he said, "I am not sure I would call it a relationship."

"Tom!" B'Elanna growled warningly, her eyes still blazing with pure anger.

Taking in a strong breath Tom stated steadily "No Lanna, no we weren't married."

"But we were together?" she pressed in her questioning.

Kathryn turned to Tom and then back to B'Elanna, hitching up her long white train on her dress with one hand and placing the other gentle hand on the younger woman's shoulder her said in her soft but husky compassionate voice "B'Elanna nobody wanted to hurt you."

"And your husband does he know you cheated on him?" B'Elanna asked as she turned her face to look into the deep blue eyes of the woman she loved and trusted no matter what.

With a deep sigh Kathryn removed her hand from B'Elanna's shoulder and with a small nod whispered, "He knows I wasn't always faithful, nor was he."

B'Elanna watched her closely for a second until Kathryn found her sapphire eyes could not hold the gaze of the half-klingon. As Kathryn dropped her gaze to the floor B'Elanna who was slowly defusing her anger and shock tilted her head and told the older woman "after that story he told today, all about how it was never with a member of the crew." At these words Kathryn turned away even more but still B'Elanna made her point "I am taking he didn't know then?"

"Not at the time no." sighed the deep voice of Voyagers former captain.

"But he does now?" snapped B'Elanna.

"I admitted I cheated on him with a member of the crew, yes." Agreed Kathryn though to say the words was breaking her heart.

"With another woman's partner?" pressed on B'Elanna.

As Kathryn turned to face the deep brown eyes of the half-klingon she felt tears begin to form in her eyes, she had not meant for this, this was not meant to be. Slowly she whispered feeling the pain "I am so sorry B'Elanna."

B'Elanna who saw the pain in the older woman's eyes did care but her klingon rage once more got the better of her compassionate human half "I can't believe it, I trusted you, looked up to you, admired you!" she growled reminding both Tom and Kathryn of a Klingon about to do battle "do you think being captain gave you the right to have any man on the ship you wanted? How many of the crew were you sleeping with while you to so bravely sacrificed yourself to get us all home?"

"B'Elanna that's not fair!" Yelled Tom as he stepped in front of Kathryn to tower above his angry wife.

"No Tom, it's fine." Said Kathryn steadily as she held her gentle hand up to push in aside, looking lovingly into B'Elanna's eyes she stepped forward and said in a steady vice with a deep conviction "B'Elanna, I care for you a great deal, I always have. I always loved Chakotay, Tom has always loved you-"

"Save it!" interjected B'Elanna "I just don't get it, you're a fraud, if you loved Chakotay so much why did you cheat on him?"

Kathryn's heart sank, she didn't really know how to answer that and she had been feeling the pain and guilt of that very statement herself. Instead of giving an answer she began to frantically trying to see if any of her wedding guests where aware of their conversation. Nobody seemed in the least bit phased and for that at least Kathryn was grateful. It was Tom who jumped to her defence to explain to his wife what had gone on between them "Lanna darling, it wasn't like that, you and I were struggling, Kathryn was there, she listened to me when I talked of my hurt, we didn't plan anything to spark between us."

As B'Elanna simply stared into the blue eyes of her husband Kathryn's heart was pounding, she might have explained it slightly differently to Tom but nobody had chance to say or do anything else because suddenly Kathryn felt a steady hand appear lovingly on the small of her back ad her husbands deep voice ring in her ear as he came to stand beside her "There you are!" Kathryn's heart froze, she didn't dare look at him, and she didn't want him to see she had been crying. "It's nearly time for our dance." He said with his joyous smile, which was only met by a silent sad looking stare from Tom and B'Elanna. Chakotay looked from one of his old friends to the other and then at his wife who was still deistically not looking at him. Removing his hand from the small of her back he felt deep concern for her as he moved to look her in the face and saw she was still trying to turn from him "Kathryn sweet heart what's wrong? You look a little flushed." He asked with deep concern in his voice as she took her hands and stroked her knuckles with his thumb.

"Flushed! She's more than flushed!" Snapped B'Elanna.

"B'Elanna?" a very confused Chakotay asked as she looked from the face of his wife to his old friend who he knew well enough to know was hurt and angry.

"Darling we need to talk, now." Insisted Kathryn as she grabbed tightly on her husbands hand and tried to lead the confused and worried man away.

"I thought he knew," snapped B'Elanna folding her arms and watching the newly weds.

"Knew what?" questioned Chakotay as she refused to walk away.

"B'Elanna please!" begged a tearful Kathryn, this was not the way she had wanted Chakotay to find out she had cheated on him with Tom Paris!

"Lanna this is their wedding day!" Gasped a wide-eyed Tom taking hold of his wife and trying to sternly guide her away. Looking over his shoulder at Kathryn and Chakotay he said softly "I am so sorry."

"Your sorry? For what? For sleeping with her?" yelled B'Elanna, at her words all froze and stared at her. Tom stopped walking and let go of his wife sadly, still unable to turn to face Kathryn or Chakotay. B'Elanna was staring at her husband with blazing eyes. Chakotay froze and look in horror from B'Elanna to Tom, until it dawned on him that Tom nor Kathryn were denying B'Elanna's accusation.

Slowly turning to his own wife he saw pain and guilt in her face as he asked steadily and yet deeply "Kathryn?"

"Oh Chakotay, I am so sorry." She whispered sadly as she turned her deep watery sapphire eyes to her new husband. She wanted to move towards the man she loved with all her heart, she wanted to embrace him and claim him as her own but when he returned her begging eyes with a steady heavy breathing and a dead pan look she knew his anger was about to spike, her heart clenched and her soul sank. His silence broke her heart "Chakotay, please say something." She begged as she looked into his eyes, which met her with the ultimate look of betrayal.