(Ayo welcome back to the G4! We gon have a few matches and things, so yuh, to be honest, this is the greatest chapter yet)

"Welcome back to the G4, I'm Jim Ross accompanied by the lovely Mare of the Night, Princess Luna, and Unicorn historian Firelight Glimmer" JR said

"The following match is set for one fall and is a tag division bout" Tracy said

"Introducing first from St. louis missouri, the viper, RANDY ORTON!" Tracy said before Orton walked out and posed

"RANDY ORTON, RKO, RANDY ORTON, R-K-O!" the crowd chanted

Fireworks errupted and then sparklers,

"And from Ponyville, Equestria, the element of laughter, Pinkie Pie" Tracy said before pinkie hopped out

"Pinkie Pie, and The legend killer, an unlikely duo" JR said

"Indeed they are" Luna nodded as they walked down the ramp

"RANDY! RANDY! RANDY!" the crowd popped as the two entered the ring

"Randy orton is a 16 time WWE heavyweight championship holder, and a force to be reckoned with!" JR explained "He has faced Shawn Michaels, John Cena, Undertaker, Kane, Jeff Hardy, Pink Diamond, Urania the first and Edge"

"That's a quite large list!" Luna said

"And from Ponyville Equestria and Pie rock farm respectivially, Vinyl and Maud 'the rock' pie!" tracy said as the two mares walked out

"ROCKYROCKYROCKY!" the crowd chanted as Maud and vinyl got into the ring

The bell rang and Randy and Vinyl started

"Sup?" Vinyl asked

"...I'm going to BURY YOU" He said before hitting a punt and whipping the mare to the turnbuckle

"RANDY ORTON! RANDY ORTON!" the crowd shouted before he hit a clothesline followed by a neck chop, the Mare kipping up and bucking him torward the ropes befor he bounced off and was met with a

"CODEBREAKER!" JR said

"Actually that move is called the 'final wub' " Luna corrected

"JERICHO! JERICHO! JERICHO!" the crowd chanted before Randy grabbed the ropes and tagged pinkie in, rolling out of the way

"Hi Vinyl!" Pinkie smiled

"Hey pinkie" Vinyl smiled back before she was hit with an RKO

"RKO FROM A PINK HORSE, WHAT THE HELL HAVE I JUST WITNESSED?!" JR shouted before Vinyl grabbed pinkies mane and threw her to the side before tagging in maud and rolling out of the ring

"Pinkie…...you're going down" Maud said before standing up and hitting a

"ROCK BOTTOM!" JR shouted before a pin attempt was made, Randy running into the ring and kicking Maud off of pinkie before rolling out of the ring

"Randy orton breaking up the pin, and Pinkie kipping up" JR said as Pinkie got up

"M-E-C-C-W! M-E-C-C-W!" the crowd chanted as Pinkie picked up Maud and hit an F-5 followed by an elbow drop and pin attempt, the ref diving and counting "1...t-"

Maud suddenly kicked out and kipped up, hitting a snapmare (A/N: no pun intended) on her sister followed by a headlock, Orton and vinyl fighting on the outside of the ring

Pinkie escaping and hitting a kinshasa

"KINSHASA! KINSHASA!" JR shouted before maud fell and pinkie pinned her "1...2...thr-" Maud kipped up and Vinyl irish whipped Orton into a ringpost, Orton then turning around and kicking Vinyl in the snout

"I can feel that one!" Firelight said

Pinkie tagged orton in and the legend killer slid into the ring only to get hit by mauds backhoof, Orton punching Maud in the stomach area and then grabbed her by the nck, placing her backhooves on the top rope before hitting an elavated DDT followed by an Elbow drop and a pin attempt

"1...2...thr-" orton suddenly stood up and tagged in pinkie

"What the hell?" JR asked before pinkie pinned Maud

"1...2...3!" the referee counted

"That was amazing!" Firelight said as pinkie and randy left

"Wel, we tried, so, maud …. is that randy guy your brother inlaw?" Vinyl asked

"...I hope not" Maud said "I'd want that to myself"

"Oh Maud you dirty filly!" Vinyl smirked

(Backstage) (On titantron)

The Elite, Mina, Globgore and AJ Styles stood in Bullet club shirts wearing sunglasses

"Before you even try to talk commantary, your mics have been disabled" Kenny smiled

"This Event is a disgrace to this promotion….and to wrestling" Cody began "I am all for new and innovative Ideas, but fighting alien ponies? Rock people…..monsters fucking uni" Finn walked up to Cody

"...Sorry Balor…" Cody said

"It's fine….this match card truly is horrid though, the main…...wait just came up with soething, the MANE event is a mare dressed as mick bloody foley and my son for two garbage belts!" Balor said

"...I thought the Hardcore championship looked cool" Nick said

"Yeah I mean it's a WCW belt, who doesn't love nostalgia!" Matt asked

"Still, my son is better than this, he faced kenny bloody omega! Why is he fighting a horse?" Finn shouted "WHY IS HE FUCKING A HORSE?! WHERE IS HE?! I'LL TELL YOU WHERE…..DEAD, YOU KILLED HIM! I SAW MY SON LAYING IN MY STEPDAUGHTERS ARMS DEAD! YOU WANT TO PLAY A GAME? ALRIGHT…...WE'RE THE BULLET CLUB, AND THIS IS RUSSIAN FUCKING ROULETTE!" Balor screamed "You shot saturn through the heart, now i'll shoot through the heart of this dimension, the CRYSTAL heart, where is Cadance? It doesn't matter, get her so she can pay in blood for my son's death! My wife, my love has been crying, Eclipsa has been SOBBING for the past 30 minutes!"

"BALOR VS CADANCE! BALOR VS CADANCE!" the crowd popped

"I WILL END HER FOR HURTING MY LOVED ONES, NOT EVEN SHASTACAN WANTED TO KILL SATURN…..AND YES YES I KNOW HE IS STILL ALIVE….BUT THE INTENT WAS TO KILL MY SON!"

{Cut to Commercial}

(Backstage)

Festivia sat on a couch with Saturn, Chibiusa, Usagi, and Starlight watching TV

"...there's nothin good on!" Saturn slumped and groaned

"There's Star Trek….." Festivia pointed out

"Or….we can Watch endgame!" Starlight smiled holding up a DVD case

"...How about we make a comprimise…..Infinity war" Saturn said

"Infinity what? Can't we just watch a Godzilla?" Usagi asked

"Ayo chill wit that….we ain't tryin get attacked for racist claims" Saturn said

"...What's endgame and infinity war about?" Chibiusa asked

"It's a cinematic clash between the titan thanos who wants to erase half the life in the universe and the Avengers" Saturn explained

"The who?" Usagi asked

"Avengers, you know Iron Man, Hulk, , Black Panther, War Machine, Black Widow, Thor, Hawkeye and Captain america" Saturn said

"...Isn't america evil though? They did drop nuclear bombs on poor old japan for no reason" Usagi said

"Yeah...Yeah your watching a documentary about WW2,...and don't cry about japan being evil, yall are chill….it's just, yall allied with the nazis" Saturn said

"...We did? I didn't learn that in school….I didn't pay much attention in school either" Usagi explained "And the nazis were big meanies"

"...the historic massacre of millions of people based on religion and race and the worst you call them are big meanies?" Chibiusa called out "Usagi…..Mom….that's messed up"

"I never knew the japaneese were allies with germany in WWII!" Usagi shouted

"Maybe you shouldn't get your history from godzilla movies!" Chibiusa shouted back

"I didn't know!" Usagi cried

"HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW THAT?!" Saturn shouted "YOU'RE SALIOR MOON, YOU SHOULD ATLEAST KNOW THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD YOU ARE PROTECTING!"

"I'M SORRY I JUST THOUGHT AMERICANS WERE BIG MEANIES, THAT'S WHAT IT SAID IN THAT NEW GODZILLA MOVIE!" Usagi shouted back

"I'M AN AMERICAN!" Saturn said "AM I A MEANIE?"

"NO SATURN YOU'RE REALLY NICE I'M SORRY!" Usagi began to cry

"...apology accepted" Saturn smiled "...So what to watch…"

"Crying Breakfast Friends is on" Starlight pointed out

"That's my favorite…..glim, this Interdimensional cable is the best, you're the best!" Saturn smiled before the door opened behind them

"Pichu?" Mara Squeaked

"Hey mara, you wanna come watch TV?" Saturn asked

"Pi!" She smiled and hopped on Festivia's lap as the door opened again

"Saturn!" Eclipsa ran in "My baby!" she hugged him tightly

"I love you too ma!" Saturn replied as Selene walked in with Star carrying tacos

"S-SATURN?!" Star began to cry dropping the bag of tacos and running at her uncle and hugging him

"Selene…..help me" Saturn said "They're smothering me!"

"...No" She smirked and sat down

"Starlight!" Saturn playfully begged

"Hey guys….Some pony named Sunburst is here….he wants to see Starlight" Tracy poked her head in as Star and Eclipsa released their grip

"Where is he?" Starlight asked

"...At the food stand…...With some older mare named Selltar" Tracy informed

"Sunburst's mom?" Starlight asked "...I'll be right there"

"Bye Glim" Saturn said

"I'll be right back, love you" She smiled

"Love you too!" Saturn smiled back

(Food court)

Sunburst and an older darker orange mare stood in line

"What did you say these things were?" The mare whispered glancing at the undertaker

"Mewmans" Sunburst said "And they aren't things mom, they're creatures"

"I can help who's next!" Urania said, the two unicorns walking up

"...Hello….can I get a medium popcorn?" The mare asked

"Do you want that with extra butter?" she replied

"...No Butter if possible, I'm on a bit of a diet…..Sunburst what would you like?" The mare asked

"Mom I can order my own food, i'm a grown stallion!" Sunburst replied "...I'll have a bag of kettlecorn"

"That'll be 15 bits between the two of you" Urania laughed when she saw their shocked faces "I'm kidding, 4 bits"

"Here" The mare paid before Starlight walked up to the two

"Starlight!" Sunburst smiled "...Where's Saturn?"

"Backstage" Starlight explained "Are you two enjoying the show?"

"...It's quite the production if I must say" Selltar said "we just came during that Pinkie Pie and Randy….Tag Match is it? It was very, what's the word, unique"

"...Starlight, Five minutes to the Celestia vs Undertaker rematch" Tracy informed

"Princess Celestia…...Is here?" Selltar asked

"All four princess are…..and so is princess Star of Mewni" Starlight explained "How about this, you and Sunburst join Saturn and Manekind on commentary for this match!"

"...Welll….having public endorcment would be good for business!' Selltar said "What the Hay, why not?"

(Arena) (5 minutes later)

Selltar, Sunburst and Manekind sat at the announcer booth before Saturn rolled a chair up to them

"Hi Derpy, Sunburst…..Vicki" Saturn said shaking everyones hoof

"It's selltar actually….." she corrected

"Got it, cellsar" Saturn smiled "Anyways welcome back to the G4! Right here with have one of the biggest matches of the night, a tornado tag bout between the brothers of destruction and the alicorn sisters"

(Dark Side WWF)

Kane and Undertaker walked out side by side, Kane raising both his arms before slamming them down as the bass of the song dropped, Fire errupting down the ramp

"Kane and the Undertaker, two forces of POWER!" Saturn said before Undertaker stopped and did his kneeling toungue thing, Kane flipping his hair away from his mask and pushing his gloved thumb against his throat, the two climbing into the ring

"KANE AND TAKER! KANE AND TAKER! KANE AND TAKER! KANE AND TAKER!" the crowd popped as Kane raised his arms, slamming them down making flames errupt from the ringposts

"Now…..Which one is Kane and which is Taker?" Sunburst asked

"Kane's in the mask, Takers in black" Derpy answered

"And why are the princesses fighting these two ape creatures?" Selltar asked

"Undertaker and Celestia had a match yesterday in the crystal empire," Derpy said

"since that was the biggest match, Luna and Starlight decided to schedule a match for the G4 with both alicorn sisters and both brothers of destruction " Saturn explained

Luna and Celestia walked out to a cheering crowd, the two climbing into the ring

"Sunburst I can't believe you have connections to such a powerful unicorn that can just make the alicorn princess do her whim!' Selltar Said

"Not really whim…..more like contractual obligation" Derpy explained as the bell rang Luna and Kane locking up before Kane throwing her to the side, Undertaker Hitting a big boot followed by a dropkick on celestia

"The undertaker…..a man I grew up watching fighting the best of the WWE, John Cena, Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Kofi Kingston, Edge, and even his brother Kane in one of the most gruesome matches divised, the buried alive match" Saturn said as celestia got up and smacked taker with her wing before hitting a DDT and then a knee, Kane grabbing luna by the mane and dragging her back into the ring

"I heard you were in a buried alive match against Kane once" Derpy said

"Yeah, and I lost, I was so busy focused on the title I couldn't help my Neice" Saturn replied as Kane was hit with a buck followed by a huricanrana and a hoof drop, Undertaker getting up and grabbing Celestia and setting up a final ride

"Oh no, Here come's the powerbomb!" Derpy said

"What is that?" Selltar asked as taker hit the powerbomb and Luna ran to Undertaker and hit a codbreaker

"FINAL WUB!" Derpy said

"This is crazy!" Selltar shouted before Undertaker sat straight up from the move and grabbed luna by the neck hitting a chokeslam, Celestia standing on her hind legs and Setting up kane for a tombstone, undertaker getting behind her

"Oh no, taker, no!" Saturn said as he set up CELESTIA for a tombstone with Kane's help, the two hit a

"DOUBLE TOMBSTONE!" Saturn screamed as Celestia's horn shattered, Luna running at Kane and hitting a frankenstiener, slamming his skull into the ground and then looking at Taker "You fix her this instant brute!"

"Celestia's horn!" Sunburst shouted

"...Yes your majesty" Taker sighed before floating Tia's horn shards into formation and melding them to her horn base with magic Kane running and hopping on Celestia's back, locking in a camel clutch as Luna and taker locked up and traded blows

"Camel clutch!" Derpy said "...You know my daughter Dinky has put me in a few camel clutches herself, she's quite the showfilly"

"You don't say, maybe we could arrange a playdate beetween her and Fest" Saturn suggested as Luna smacked Taker with a knee before running and clotheslining Kane off of Celestia, the giant toppling and Celestia slowly crawled over and pinned

"PRINCESS YOU HAVE THIS!" Selltar shouted as the referee counted "1...2" Kane suddenly sat up and was PISSED

"The demon is unleashed!" Saturn said as Kane began to beat on the two with punch after punch after punch, he then grabbed Luna's back legs and began to hit celestias back with her sisters making sunbutt collapse

Taker then grabbed CCelestias leg and locked in a hoofbar, the mare grabbing the ropes with her wing before getting up and stabbing taker with her horn, blood splattering onto the ring, Kane running and grabbing Celestia by the throat and hitting a chokeslam before grabbing luna and setting up a powerbomb which connected into a pin attempt "1...2" the referee counted before luna got up and poked Kane with her horn, she then hit a kinshasa

"CHAOS AND CARNAGE! Discord must be growing in power!" Sunburst said as Kane fell, Taker getting up and grabbing Celestia's hoof, climbing the rope and then tightrope walk, hitting an old school before a deadman lock which she released herself from, Luna hitting a DDT, Kane kipping up and setting her up for a tombstone

"OH MY GOD, NO, KANE DON'T DO IT!" Saturn said as Kane laughed, climbing the ring post while holding luna and hitting a tombstone onto the steel stairs, her horn shattering and flying different areas

"I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK!" Selltar said as Kane got back into the ring, Undertaker helping Celestia up so Kane could hit a punt slaming her back down, he then pinned her and the referee began to count again

"1...2.." Celestia suddenly sat up and reversed the pin "1...2...3!"

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!" the crowd chanted as Celestia and Luna got up Undertaker shaking both their hooves as Kane left the ring

"What's Kane doing?" Sunburst asked as Kane reached under the ring grabbing a steel bat

"OH MY GOD" Saturn said as the demon slid into the ring and slammed the bat into taker's chest before smacking it across Celestia and Luna's back, the three dropped to the ground as Kane dropped the weapon and left the ring and walked backstage, Saturn and Derpy running into the ring to help the three

"Tia, Luna, Taker are you ok?" Saturn asked

"...My horn! MY HORN!" Luna cried

"We can grow it back, Starlight and Sting are mega powerful" Saturn reassured "I'll get you two to the sick bay, Nurse Redheart and Dr. Zoidberg can look at you further"

"Undertaker?" Derpy asked

"M-mick? I'll be fine, it was just one bump, i've gone through worse" Taker explained standing up and leaving the ring, Saturn picking up Luna and Celestia and lugging them over his shoulder, exiting the ring Selltar and Sunburst getting up as they thought everything was over

(Backstage) (On Titantron) (Commentary left)

Sting sat in Starlight's chair as a brunette girl with a shooting star sweater woke up on the floor

"Oh good, you're awake" Starlight trotted in

"Aku You can leave" Bill said internally before the two split apart

"BILL CYPHER! But I thought Ford and Grunkle Stan killed you! Where am I?" The girl asked

"Mabel Pines….how would you like to be a proffesional Wrestler?" Starlight asked

"I'm sorry miss, but i've learned not to trust unicorns" The girl huffed "i had a moment…."

"Smart Kid you got here bill...how does an infinite supply of glitter yarn and candy sound?" Starlight asked

"Come on shooting star! You'd be stupid to pass that up!" Bill said

"Look, Mabel, it's all up to you, if you want we can send you back home right now" Starlight offered

"...I don't know….is there any hot guys here?" Mabel asked

"SATURN IS MY MAN, IF YOU LAY A FINGER ON HIM I'LL GU- ….." Starlight stopped herself "...A few"

"Glim? Sweetie?" Saturn poked his head in "you good?"

"Yeah Babe, i'm good!" She smiled back "What do you say?"

"This won't destroy the universe will it?" Mabel asked

"No! I live in the universe! And so does my boyfriend, and his mom and sister, and my dad!" Starlight said

"Well…..what the heck...I'll join!" Mabel replied

"Cool, just sign this legal document" Starlight said giving a packet to mabel

"One condition…...I want a unicorn back ride NOW" Mabel said with pen in hand

"Oh…..then sign here" Starlight pointed to a seperate page that Mabel signed "Thank you dearie!" Mabel hopping on Starlight's back

"Let's go!" Mabel said as Starlight trotted out

(Backstage) (not on titantron)

Eclipsa sat in the room from before with Mara on her lap and Globgore next to her, Saturn slamming open the door "Crissy i got the facepaint!"

"Crissy went with Fluer to see Sire's hollow" Eclipsa explained

"...I could paint your face" Balor said

"Could you make me goldust?" Saturn asked

"I can try" Balore replied

(Backstage cafe) (JR and Luna are now on commentary)

Festivia sat with Selene, Star, Usagi and Chibiusa

"There's festivia…..and Selene, and Star, and Usagi and Chibiusa" JR said

"You know, it's good to have a girls night" Festivia smiled as Starlight trotted past

"...Starlight's never given me a horsey back ride!" Chibiusa huffed

"Glim's busy most of the time, whoever that is, she must be important" Festivia reasoned as Usagi's phone rang

"Huh?" Usagi looked at her phone "Oh….it's Makoto….This caller ID thing is handy"

"What the hell's a Makoto?" JR asked

"...We have not the faintest clue" Luna sighed

"Hi Makoto!" Usagi answered

"...How did you know it was me?" The girl on the phone asked "Where are you and Chibiusa? It's been a month, Darrion is worried sick! We all are!"

"I'm Safe, Chibiusa made a new friend" Usagi replied

"Oh and Kenny omega beat Usagi's ass dressed as Salior Moon" Festivia added

"...She isn't wrong about that one" JR said

"Kenny who? Usagi we need you! There are monsters attacking tokyo!" Makoto said

"...Have the avengers deal with it, they beat thanos!" Usagi said

"What are you talking about?" Makoto asked, a different voice answered

"USAGI YOU BETTER GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!" she shouted

"Rei, you guys can handle it, if Elmo is attacking you can deal with it!" Usagi answered

"How's MECCW? Is there alot of cute boys there?!" a third voice butted in

"MECC-what?" Rei asked

"You guys don't get SPIKE-Interdimensional?" the voice asked

"...I don't have cable!" Rei reminded

"Will you three be quiet?!" Usagi asked "Yes, there are alot of cute boys here"

"Three? I can't keep track anymore" JR sighed

"...Could you introduce me to Edge?" mystery voice asked

"Fine Minako I'll introduce you to Edge…...Starlight, can you bring Salior Venus here?" Usagi asked the trotting unicorn

"Salior Venus…?" JR asked

"...Sure, whatever, but you owe me" Starlight's horn glowed and the Salior scout appeared ontop of the table

"Great, now my Ice cream has essance of Salior scout" Selene huffed, Salior venus waking up in full gear

"Usagi!" Minako smiled getting up "...So can yo-"

"...I'll introduce you to Edge" Usagi Sighed as Minako got up and followed Usagi to another table

"Edge" She walked up to the superstar

"Hey Usagi…...you thinking over that offer?" Edge smirked

"No you creep! I was going to introduce you to my friend!" Usagi yelled

"Oh that son of a bitch!" JR said

"Hi, I'm Minako!" She smiled "I'm a big fan"

"ARIGATO TO YOU BABY!" Edge grinned "You single?"

"Edge she's sixteen at most!" JR said disgusted

"...I could have another boyfriend" she winked

"Oh lord" JR rolled his eyes

"I like your style kid!" Edge got up "Moon you never told me you had such a smoking hot friend!"

"YOU PERVERT!" Usagi shouted before smacking edge

"Ow, what was that for?" Edge asked

"Yeah, what was that for!" Minako asked

"WHAT THE HELL?!" JR shouted

"I'll uh I'll...I'll leave you two be!" Usagi walked away

"You and I could be GREAT together!" Edge smiled

"You think so?"

"I KNOW SO"

"Hey kid" Randy walked past "Hey edg- no no no, no no no, no , NO!"

"Randy orton has the same reaction you do JR" Luna said

"You ever been to space mountain?" Edge winked before getting RKO'd

"RANDY! I WAS GONNA SCORE!" Edge shouted

"SHE A KID!" Randy shouted

"actually...I'm fifteen" Minako said

"FUCK THAT!" Edge screamed

"Hey kid" Cody walked over "Usagi is it, whatever, I don't care, Kenny wanted me to give you this" he threw a shirt at Minako "You're a bullet club member now, oh, and give this one to Chibiusa" he threw her a smaller one and walked away

"Cody that's not usagi" JR said

"...thank you?" Minako said before walking back to the group and giving Chibiusa her shirt

"Chibiusa…...do you know that man?" She asked

"Yeah, that's Cody 'the american nightmare' " Chibiusa said

"American NIGHTMARE?!" She shouted

"...why were you talking with the bullet club?" Usagi asked

"The 'bullet club' wanted you and Chibi to be members and confused me for you" Minako explained "Honestly i'm only familliar with Kenny Omega and Hulk Hogan, I have no Idea who the other guys are!"

"Kenny Omega…..and the young bucks…...and Finn Balor….And Hulk Hogan wanted ME?" Usagi asked

"Hey guys" Saturn walked up, now in goldust makeup "Can I sit with y'all?"

"Here's Saturn" JR said "...dressed as Goldust"

"Sorry Saturn….it's a girls night table" Star said

"Wait a minute…...Are you Saturn?" Minako asked hopping up and down squealing

"...Minako…...that's my uncle" Star said

"Yeah Saturn isn't that special" Chibiusa said

"...Can you say…..THE THING?!" She asked

"HOLY SHIT YOU'RE FUCKING SMOKING!" Saturn shouted making everyone at the table drop their ice cream

"Really...really subtle there" Luna sighed

"SATURN! MINAKO ISN'T A FLOOZY LIKE YOUR SISTER IS GONNA GROW UP TO BE!" Chibiusa shouted

"Oh lord" JR said

"HEY FUCK YOU PRINCESS BUBBLEGUM! ATLEAST I CAN GET SOME!" Festivia replied

"OH MAH GAWD!" JR screamed

"...ARE YOU FUCKING ABYSS?!" Usagi asked

"No" She said flatly

"Fighting will get us nowhere, Minako, what did you want me to say?" Saturn asked

"...If getting you to say a line will cause chibiusa to call festivia a floozy…..i'll pass" She said

"Smart kid" JR stated

"...where are the other Salior scouts?" Saturn asked

"There are more?" Luna asked

"Who knew?" JR asked

"They're at Rei's…..Is it really 2019 here?" Minako asked

"Yeah, it is….you smoke?" Saturn asked

"Ew, Saturn! cigarette's are gross!" Usagi said

"He's talking about weed, Usagi!" Chibiusa said

"...No thanks" Minako sweatdropped

"Ok" Saturn said before stuffing a card inbetween Minako's knockers "Call that number if you're lookin for a good time!" He walked away

"...he think's you're a prostitute" Chibiusa explained

"Oh lord!" JR said

(Backstage, not on titantron)

Saturn walked up to Starlight who was trotting with mabel on her back

"Glim!" Saturn smiled "...Glim, who's the kid? OH GOD I DIDN'T GET YOU PREGNANT DID I?!"

"What? No, Saturn….this is Mabel…...she's gonna face Festivia in a TLC match at the Unforgiven Budokai Tekashi Tenkaichi" Starlight explained

"Oh?" Saturn asked "Nice to meet you kid" he shook Mabel's hand "Glim…..could you bring THE REST of the Salior Scouts?...I think Usagi is gettin a lil homesick"

"Yeah" Her horn glowed and Salior mars, jupiter and Mercury appeared on the table, Tuxedo mask appearing on a nearby empty table

"...I'm done" Selene huffed and walked away

"Same" Star got up and followed Selene

"Uh…..where are we?" Salior mars asked

"Equestria, Dimension Equis" Festivia said

"...Dimension Equis?" Mercury asked

"...so, this wasn't just a bad dream" Darrion got up and walked to the group

"Merry fucking christmas to you Usagi, I got Starlight to transport these fucks from tokyo to Equis" Saturn walked past flipping off the group

"Usagi…...explain, right now" Mars crossed her arms

"...Well Makoto, uhhhh I'MAPROFFESIONALWRESTLERNOWANDIWORKFORAUNICORN!" Usagi revealed making the senshi's jaws drop

"Are those clowns causing any trouble?" Darrion asked

"...No J and 2 Dope are actually playing Nintendo now" Usagi replied before Kenny, the young bucks, finn balor, aj styles and Mina walked past before stopping

"Let me guess, you guys saw the bullet club and wanted to make a group" Kenny said

"Kenny….that's the Salior Senshi" Nick informed

"No way…...it's Usagi's mom and Dad" Makoto rubbed her eyes

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY?!" Kenny asked

"...that would explain why you dressed up as her for the monster's ball!" Matt joked

"Hey Matt…...fuck you" Kenny flipped off his friend "I'm a human, not a lunarian…..also, i'm not a fucking anime character"

"Not this again!" Darrion said

"And i'm a Mewman Solarian soldier…..not a 'Lunarian' " Mina posed

"...Usagi makes these two look normal" Nick muttered

"Hey Nick….Shut up" Kenny flipped him off too

"Merry Christmas you're all part of the bullet club now" Finn walked up to the Senshi and threw a shirt at each of them "You too Fest"

"Darrion, Festivia, Chibiusa, you're on commentary with JR" Starlight walked past

"Are you a unicorn?" Tuxedo mask asked

"No Darrion i'm a pegasus" Starlight replied sarcastically "Name's Starlight Glimmer, MECCW Commisioner and GM" Glim introduced

"Why me?!" Usagi asked

"Beacuse you sell T-shirts, and your friends could sell MORE!" Starlight smiled "we could be fucking ROLLING IN MONEY, BLOODY ROLLING!"

"Usagi please, didn't you say you wanted me to have friends around my age? I have Festivia now!" Chibiusa said

"...i….ugh fine, we'll stay here…for a few….A few more shows" Usagi said

(Arena)

The four commentartors sat in computer chairs, Chibiusa sitting on Darrions lap

"Hi, i'm Chibi salior moon, acc- accom- I'm with Tuxedo Mask, Jim Ross and my Friend Festivia!" Chibiusa smiled

(WWF- Mankind)

Derpy walked out to the bottom of the ramp with a title belt drouped over her shoulder and a Microphone in hoof

"...My name, is derpy hooves, now I may not be Mick folley, but i'm pretty tough….I've been through lightning strikes to the head, chair shot, falling THROUGH buildings, Tables, Rainbows, Earthquakes, Bugbears and being a single mother" Derpy introduced "I know i'm no Saturn, but i'm sure I can beat him, and if you don't think so, i'll prove everypony wrong, ONE by ONE, This...This is the PWF hardcore belt, it has the 24/7 clause the MECCW title has…..if anyone would like to face me for it, be my guest!"

"...Is that a horse?" Darrion asked

"Pegasus" JR corrected "...what's the mask for kid?"

"...He's a Mewni Market Batman" Festivia joked

"HE'S A SUPERHERO NOT A VAMPIRE!" Chibiusa shouted before punching Festivia

"You BITCH!" Festivia stood up "You wanna go?"

"Festivia….this isn't something to start a fight over" JR said

"She called my da- Tuxedo Mask a batman!" Chibiusa shouted

"...Look Cheebz, i'm just a bit stressed, I didn't get that match I wanted, I thought that my brother DIED…" Festivia said

"Wait, what?" Darrion asked, Derpy still waiting

"...oh well, you guys have a nice day" She said before walking away

"You know that invatation is open to you two" JR said, Festivia's eye's widening as she stood up

"DERPY HOOVES!" Festivia stood up "I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLANGE!" she jumped over the announcer table and a bell rang, Festivia ran and hit a kinshasa toppling the grown mare who then got up to another kick, Festivia then diving under the ring and grabbing Saturn's barb chair

"...can I use the bathroom?" Chibiusa asked frightened

"Go, now" Darrion said, his daughter getting up and running to the bathroom, Festivia slamming the wire into Derpy's back once before Eclipsa and Jerry Lawler ran out from opposite ends of the arena, running to festivia

"FESTIVIA!" They both shouted at the same time before staring at eachother

"Oh no" JR sighed

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" they both shouted

"PARENTING!" they screamed

"Festivia, Stop right this instant" Eclipsa said

"..." Festivia dropped her chair and helped Derpy up

"What do you have to say for yourself young lady?" Lawler crossed his arms

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to make you proud of me for once" Festivia said

"By hitting a pegasus with a chair?!" Shastacan shouted "THIS This is all your ASSHOLE FREAK SON'S FAULT!" he screamed at Eclipsa

"Jerry, take a moment to look over what you're doing" Eclipsa said crossing her arms

"What i'm doing? What i'm doing eclipsa? Atleast I don't let my kids play ECW!" he shouted "you, YOU ARE THE WORST!"

"I'm the worst? Atleas-" Eclipsa and Shastacan were interrupted

"SHUT UP! YOU'RE BOTH AT FAULT!" Saturn said from ontop of the titantron "YOU ARE BOTH NEGLECTFUL, HORRIBLE, SELFISH, AND SELFDESTRUCTIVE!"

"NEGLECTFUL?!" Eclipsa shouted "I wasn-"

"You are now!" Saturn screamed, Sweat dripping down his face "You think this is easy for any of us? NO! It's confusing and draining, my adoptive parents are worried sick as i've gone missing, My sister is in constant danger and her parents don't seem to give a shit until now! I'm so…...constantly, DEFEATED! I DIED! I DIED, and my murderer is apperantly somewhere in this building….." he gripped his hair and began to rip strains from it "YOU WANNA RUIN THIS SHOW BY FIGHTING? TOO BAD, YOU'RE BOTH SUSPENDED FOR A MONTH!"

"Please Saturn! Don't suspend me!" Jerry got on his knees and cried "Please! I'll do anything!" he then quickly covered his mouth

"You wanna keep your job? fine...you two…...are on commentary, for the remander of the program" Saturn said before turning around and hitting a backflip off of the titantron "Go sit down Ma, Darrion, go get ice cream or whatever…...I have supplies to gather"

"Supplies?" JR asked as Eclipsa kneeled down to Festivia's height

"Festivia, go play with Star…..this may be a while" Eclipsa said as Jerry walked to the announcer table

"...ok" She nodded and walked away, Eclipsa then walked to the announcer table, the two sat at opposite ends of JR

"I can't stand you" Jerry crossed his arms

"Atleast we can agree on one thing" Eclipsa crossed her arms

"Can't you two just be adults about this?" JR asked

(GM office)

Starlight sat in an armchair as a knock was heard

"Come in!" She said

"Starlight, I don't wanna fight Rarity and Applejack" Jeff walked in

"This beacuse of Dashie?...wait, WAIT, you like dashie, you like-like dashie don't you?" Starlight grinned

"Starlight that's ridiculous, I have a wife" Jeff said "I- i just think, … ok you got me"

"Ok…..your match is off the card" Starlight said

"R-really?" Hardy asked

"Yeah really, you want some alicorn wing?" she pointed to a wing that was rotating on a rotissarie

"...I'm good" Jeff said before leaving the room

(Backstage, DWO room)

Randy, Pinkie, rainbow, Star, Festivia, Crissy, Mara and Rose sat at a table, the commercials playing on a TV in the background, the door opening

"Hey guys…." Saturn huffed

"Saturn, you look exhausted" Star said

"Emotions can be tiring" Crissy said

"I haven't slept in two days" he explained "except for, you know, dying"

"Pichu!" Mara ran and gave Saturn a hug

"...Mara…...don't" Crissy warned confusing everyone but Festivia

"No….it's Saturn we're talking about" Festivia reminded

"PICHU!" She shouted electricuting Saturn which woke him up

"...thanks Mara, I needed that kiddo" Saturn smiled drowsily "I came here….to ask…...if i'm still a member"

"Of the DWO? Saturn of course you are silly!" pinkie said

"Just…...don't attack twilight again" Rainbow said sternly

"That's fair" Saturn replied sitting on a nearby couch "Hey Crissy, where's your buddy fluer?"

"She's with luna in the Med Bay" Crissy replied "She's a royal guard you know"

"yeah...Mind if I take a nap?" Saturn asked

"Saturn, no one gives a shit, touch yourself for all we care!" Randy joked

"Please don't" Festivia said before Saturn grabbed an Edge blanket from ontop of a shelf and laid down

"I forgot he had that" Rose admitted as Tracy opened the door

"Oh ok, he's asleep" Tracy turned around and walked out of the room

"Why are we still a team?" Randy asked

"Yeah, Sting hasn't done shit in a long time" Festivia said

"Festivia, language…...but she's right" Star agreed "Unless…..he's planning something"

"I think we need to worry about that 'bullet club' " Rose said

"In any case it's still good to have another pair of eyes, we may be acting buddy buddy, but this is a war" Randy said as Starlight walked in

"Saturn" she walked over to her sleeping boyfriend "saturn…..did you book a preformance?"

"...For you babe" He smiled

"Saturn, you're amazing!" Glim smiled

(Cafeteria)

The Salior Senshi sat at a table, bullet club shirts now on

"...so….Usagi" Rei said "2019"

"MOM FESTIVIA HIT A HORSE IN THE BACK WITH A BARB WIRE CHAIR!" Chibiusa ran in crying "I- I don't know what she did next, I was so scared, I came to you"

"...Ugh, come sit on my lap Chibiusa" Usagi said hugging her future offspring, Tuxedo Mask running to the group

"Is chibiusa here? Saturn settled everything..." He explained "Festivia isn't going to hurt anyone anytime soon"

"...really?" she loosened her grip on Usagi

"Really Really" Darrion replied

"Do you mind if I pipe in?" Solaria asked

"...Who is that?" Darrion asked

"...that…...is Festivia's grandma" Usagi explained "...go right ahead"

"Festivia's in a tough spot, she's finding out her life is a lie, she isn't really a princess, she isn't really eclipsa's spawn, and that monsters aren't evil…...that last one's a shock for me too….since, you know, i'm solaria the monster carver….there's alot of emotions brewing, and it's all bottle capping, what we can do as her friends and family is accept her"

"...That poor kid!" Minako said

"No wonder she's so upset" Darrion thought

"...are Mina and Kenny Omega your parents?" Solaria asked Usagi

"NOT THIS AGAIN!" She cried before slamming her head onto the table

"Totally mina's kid" Solaria thought

(Arena)

"Welcome back to MECCW, i'm jim ross accompanied by my collages Eclipsa butterfly and Jerry 'the King' Lawler" JR said

"This is ridiculous!" Eclipsa cried

"I don't see what the problem is, Festivia isn't even biologically mine! I bought her from those pie folk freaks!" Jerry said

"What?" Eclipsa said sternly

"Why do you think I didn't care?" King asked

"You BOUGHT Festivia?!" Eclipsa asked inraged "you didn't adopt her, YOU BOUGHT HER?!"

"I-it's it's like Ted dibiase always said…...every- everyone ha- ha- has a price" He stuttered as his ex wife stood up

"I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL FUCKING MURDER YOU!" Eclipsa shouted reaching for Jerry but being held back by JR

"JR SHE'S CRAZY!" Jerry shouted

"YOU NEVER ADOPTED HER, YOU BOUGHT HER LIKE- LIKE AN ANIMAL!" Eclipsa screamed "THAT'S MY DAUGHTER! THAT'S MY FESTIVIA!"

"...Sorry" he gulped

"Sorry? SORRY! YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN SORRY WHEN WE FIRST MET! I WISH I NEVER MET YOU!" She screamed back

"WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY?! SHE'S JUST A PEASANT!" Lawler replied

"THAT'S MY DAUGHTER!" Eclipsa said grabbing JR and throwing him to the damn rafters

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!" The crowd chanted as Eclipsa grabbed Shastacan's shirt, Security rushing out to break up the two

"SHASTACAN, EXPLAIN YOURSELF RIGHT NOW" Eclipsa demanded releasing the king "Who are the pie folk?"

"...travelling pastry merchants and thieves…." He admitted sheepishly

"PIErates?! YOU BOUGHT HER FROM PIERATES?!" Eclipsa shouted

"...Yes" he said scared

"PIERATES, BLOODY PIERATES!" she screamed "...I'm bringing Festivia and Selene home…...and getting a restraining order"

(Black Parade - MCR)

Starlight galloped out with microphone in hoof "WHERE'S JR?"

Eclipsa pointed up at the rafters where the man clung for dear life, Starlight sighing and floating him down

"Eclipsa….I know where Saturn gets his strength" JR said

"You two…...you know what, I can't, I just can't, I'm breaking this up, Lawler, you are BANNED from the premacies for the remainder of the show, I'll get an escort to bring you back to the island" Starlight decided, Security escorting Lawler out

"You should just fire him" Eclipsa huffed

"I thought about that, but it'd crush Festivia" Starlight responded sitting at the announcer table

(Titantron) (Backstage)

Saturn walked up to Solaria and Mina

"Gran, Mina, I got a question" Saturn said

"Shoot" Solaria replied

"Your match with Matt and Nick…...can I add Spitfire and Kenny to it?" Saturn asked

"...fine" Solaria replied

"The more the merrier!" Mina smiled

"Slappin, your match starts soon, so y'all should get ready" Saturn informed before falling to the ground and dissappearing

"Oh not this shit" he muttered

(Mewni Approx 295 years ago) (A/N: dont worry ill cover the match too)

A teenage Festivia wearing a greek toga sat at a table with the MHC and Mina visibily bored with her cheeck resting on her palm

"...Festivia! Did you hear what I said?" Heckapoo asked

"Something about a budget plan" Festivia sighed as Saturn crashed through the table from the ceiling

"...Wha- oh i'm in mewni again…..hi Mina" Saturn stood up and brushed himself off

"...who's this dingdong?" Mina asked

"Oh- OH" he grabbed a conviently placed bucket of water and poured it on his face, the paint washing off

"ENEMY OF MEWNI!" Romulus shouted before charging at Saturn, the hardcore badass grabbing the magic crystal's arms and locking in a crossface crippler

"Look buddy, i'm here beacuse I got shot by an omega beam, not by choice" he released "Hi fes- FESTIVIA?!" Saturn asked "WHAT DID YOU FREAKS DO TO MY LIL SIS?!" He growled at Heckapoo

"Little sister?" Festivia asked

"...oh my god i'm not in my timeline" Saturn remembered as his phone rang

"HE HAS A WEAPON!" Mina shouted

"Yo chill….it's just a pixie phone" He grabbed his phone "oh look at that….it's MOM" He smiled pointing to the caller id which had a picture of eclipsa enjoying a chocolate sundae

"ECLIPSA'S IN THERE?!" Romulus shouted

"MOMMY?! MOMMY'S ALIVE?!" Festivia teared up

"N-no...no Eclipsa got eaten by globgore!" Omnitraxus struggled to say, Saturn picking up the phone

"Hi Mom…...JR?...The past, alternate Festivia….of couse JR" Saturn said handing the phone to Festivia

"Who the heck is J R?" Mina asked

"Hello?" JR asked

"Momm- I mean...Mom? You sound alot…...more manly then I thought you would" Festivia said

"I'm not your Mother Kiddo, My name is Jim Ross" JR explained

"...Is Eclipsa Butterfly in there with you?" Festivia asked

"Eclipsa's in the bathroom right now, something about a bad burrito made by Pinkie Pie" JR informed "She wanted me to make sure Saturn's safe" Footsteps were then heard

"Mommy?" Festivia squealed

"...Festivia? What happened? You sound….older" Eclipsa pointed out

"MAMA IT IS YOU!" She began to cry

"Yes…...Festivia darling is everything alright? Where are you? Are you and Saturn safe?" Eclipsa asked "i'm putting you on speakerphone….set saturn's phone on a table"

She did as instructed

"WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING ECLIPSA?!" Romulus shouted

"Oh, hello romulus…..is everything ok?" Eclipsa asked

"HOW COULD EVERYTHING BE OK?! YOU'RE FREE!" Mina shouted

"Mina?" Eclipsa asked "...but, you're in the ring with Kenny Omega!"

"Kenny who? What are you talking about witch?!" Mina asked "I'm right here with Festivia and some weirdo"

"Alternate timeline" JR explained

"...oh ok…...love isn't a crime, go fuck yourself" Eclipsa smiled "Or do you need the bullet club to do that for you too?...oh wait, I forgot, your boyfriend and his goons work for my globgore"

"Your Globgore….wait, didn't globgore eat you?" Festivia asked

"No! Balor's Vegan for god's sake!" JR piped in

"Balor?" Festivia asked as a portal opened and the MECCW Festivia, Wearing Saturn's wu tang jacket

"Saturn?...Me?...Saturn can I- Excuse me um Me….What the hell are you doing?" Younger Festivia asked

"IS THIS ONE OF YOUR EVIL TRICKS?!" Omnitraxus asked Saturn

"SATURN ISN'T EVIL! HE'S CUDDLY, AND AND HE'S MY BIG BROTHER DAMNIT" Young Festivia cursed

"...Brother?" Older Festivia asked

"BROTHER!" Hulk hogan walked up "Oh hi Mina, Hey saturn…...who are these jabronies?"

"People Hulkster…..people I don't particually like….but will tolerate for Festivia…...and Star" Saturn said

"...Fair enough" he nodded and walked away

"SATURN BUTTERFLY! FESTIVIA'S!" Ric flair walked up "Rarity forgot to give you something!"

"JUSHTIN?!" Hekapoo shouted "You- You're old!"

Steve Austin walked through the portal and punched Hekapoo "SHOW SOME DAMN RESPECT! THAT'S NATURE BOY RIC FLAIR!" he walked back through the portal

The nature boy smiled and handed Saturn a robe "Try it on, kiddo"

Saturn did as instructed and hugged his uncle, tearing up "Thank you so much….can I?" he released his grip

"Go right ahead" he smiled, Saturn flair struting before falling straight on his face and shawn michaels kipping up, Older Festivia clapping

"THANK YOU, THANK YOU!" Saturn grinned and bowed

"...I bet you two might want a moment alone, this is pretty jarring" Younger festivia said closing the portal and thus exiting

"Yeah, no…..anything you say to her we're monitering" Hekapoo informed

"YOU'RE A FREAK!" Romulus shouted

"Wow, harsh….mom you hear that?" Saturn asked

"I've heard this whole thing darling" Eclipsa responded

"Mom….I have a question, are you…...still with dad? Is dad still alive?" Festivia asked

"...Jerry Shastacan 'The King' Lawler is still alive…...but i am not seeing him…...he LIED about you and made some very very mean comments" Eclipsa explained "...Festivia…I'll go somewhere more private so that no one interrupts *footsteps* Ok…...Festivia, you are adopted from the pie folk…..I still love you as much as I love Saturn…...maybe a little more" she joked

"...Adopted?" Festivia looked up at the MHC who all looked down "...is…...am I even queen?"

"Yes you are kid" Solaria walked up

"SOLARIA?!" Omnitraxus asked

"GRANDMA?" Festivia teared up again

"Yep….grandma, look, fest, even though you aren't blood related, You are family, we're all rootin for you, so be the best queen you can be….and…...don't kill monsters….they…..they're….pe- peop- peopl- people too" she admitted

"WHAAAAAA?" Mina froze

"...Hekapoo…...we're de-segragating Mewni…...and…..throwing a party to celebrate!" Festivia said

"...really? Are you sure?" Hekapoo asked

"I'm sure…" She said "If Solaria's mind is changed about monsters, so is mine"

"BEST DAMN QUEENIE!" Steve austin shouted "...other than Star"

"Thank you austin…...wait how the hell did you get here?" Saturn asked

"I never left…." Austin explained "...you got a beer?"

"I don't drink….often" Saturn said

"What was that?" Eclipsa asked

"...Bye mom!" Saturn hung up as another portal opened

"...So, i'm back, and I brought mom and grandma" Younger festivia said as Solaria and Eclipsa walked through the portal

"ENOUGH GAMES SATURN!" Hekapoo shouted

"...don't shout at my grandson" Solaria crossed her arms

"My liege!" Mina kneeled

"Mina…...that's gay" Solaria said as Festivia ran and hugged Eclipsa

"MAMA!" Festivia began to cry

"...It's ok, Mama's here now" Eclipsa smiled

"Don't leave me again" Festivia teared up

"...I'll ask Starlight for the night off so I can stay here for a moment sweetie" Eclipsa replied "Though I hope you know we can't stay….."

"WHY NOT?!" Festivia shouted before looking at the younger Festivia "You cloned me!"

"No…..Festivia, we aren't from this timeline…" Saturn explained

"THEN GO BACK YOUR TIMELINE YOU FILTHY WITCH!" Romulus shouted before getting fucking rocked by saturn

"That's our mom you're talkin bout buddy" He spoke

"YOU KNOW WHAT SHE DID! SHE RAN AWAY FROM HER KI- KITCHENETTE, HER KITCHENETTE" Hekapoo said

"What are you hiding?" Older Festivia asked the younger one holding a barb metal bat and starring down Hekapoo

"...We…..didn't want Eclipsa with a monster husband, and…...she left her kingdom for him…..they…..they had a child which we swapped out for you…..we gave the monster to future people but somehow, he's here, now, with a younger you, and Eclipsa….and Solaria" Hekapoo revealed

"YOU DIDN'T LET HER LOVE WHO SHE WANTED TO AND COVERED UP A MAN'S LIFE?!" Older festivia shouted "I'M NOT EVEN QUEEN, I DON'T DESERVE THIS WAND, HE DOES!"

"Fest, Bring gran back to the arena" He pointed to the portal "We'll get back….but first I need to chat with other you"

"Got it" Young Festivia nodded as she and Solaria left

"...Festivia, even though you are not my blood, you are my daughter, and you deserve to be queen, you're going to do great, unimaginable things, and that's beacuse we believe in you" Eclipsa sat down

"I….wouldn't make the best king…...and not because i'm a hardcore wrestler either" Saturn joked to a cold response "you have years of training in your field, magic studies, diplomacy, self defense, beaucracy….i'm not the best with the mewman crowd….infact, the only reason they backed me when we went to mewni was you"

"Saturn would probably try to Frankenstiener the economies problems away" Eclipsa joked "you're the best canidate Festivia" Saturn began to fade

"WHAT'S HAPPENING TO SATURN?!" Festivia asked

"No not now, what the fuck!" Saturn shouted before fading leaving nothing but his flair jacket

(MECCW ISLAND, BURIED ALIVE)

"Welcome back to MECCW, I'm Jim Ross, with me on commentary is Former WWE NXT champion Corey Graves, and Princess of the dimension of Mewni, Festivia." JR Said "Right now star and Saturn are in the ring, their respective members of accompaniment sitting ringside, The mother of Saturn Butterfly in his corner, and Mina, great warrior of Mewni, and Marco Diaz, best friend of Princess Star in star's"

(*Kane's music played on electric guitar*)

"And from Parts unknown, accompanied by his tag team partner Jasper, and his half-brother the undertaker, at 7'0 foot tall, weighing 323 pounds, The big red machine, KANE!" the announcer stated as flames erupted from the stage, Kane walking through them as they faded, he looked directly at Saturn and Star slashing his thumb across his throat and then lowering it to his sides, Saturn got out of the ring and started ripping at the mat finding a steel chair with thumbtacks hot glued onto it and barbed wire wrapped around it like cotton candy, the lights shutting off

"What the?" Eclipsa asked from ringside

(YNW Melly - Murder on My Mind)

{And all these pussy - hating tryna knock me off my grind}

But I can't let 'em do it

I got murder on my mind

Bitch I got murder on my mind (I got murder on my mind)

I got murder on my mind (murder on my mind)

I got murder on my mind (I got murder on my mind)

I got murder on my mind

{I got murder on my mind}

The lights slammed back on as Future saturn was carried on a shopping cart charriot pulled by Pig Goats, Warnicorns and Bret Hart…..Just, Bret Hart, no reason

"What the hell? OH MAH GAWD, IT'S BRET HART!" JR shouted, everyone in the ring stopped and looked, then looked at past Saturn

"Don't look at me! I'm just as confused as you are!" He explained

"...Murder on your mind?! Saturn do you want to kill kane?" Star shouted as Future Saturn hopped out of the charriot

"LOOK, YOU KNOW WHO I AM, BUT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN DO CHICA'S, MY NAME IS MALINKO, AND I AM A JUGGALO ELITE WARRIOR FROM THE FUTURE" Future Saturn spoke "GM WANTS A MATCH, SHE'LL GET A MATCH!"

"She?" JR asked, Corey just shrugging

"He says he's from the future, maybe GM got a gender reassingment surgery" Corey reasoned

"THIS IS NOT LONGER, A TRIPLE THREAT…..THIS IS A WAR! AND I'M A NUCLEAR WARHEAD!" Malinko shouted "I WANT IN THE MATCH, NOT AS A TRIPLE THREAT, BUT A FATAL FOURWAY!"

"This is a family matter…." Connor said

"WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE? A DUMBASS?! I KNOW THAT!" Malinko spoke "THIS IS ME LETTING LOOSE CONNOR! I'VE BEEN THROUGH HELL…...OR SHOULD I SAY LUCITOR? THUMBTACKS HAVE BEEN DRIVEN THROUGH ME, CHAIR SHOTS, TOMBSTONES AND ONE WINGED ANGELS! LIES ABOUT MY FAMILY!" he rubbed his facepaint off

"There's two Saturn's?" Festivia asked

"Did you know shastacan is really jerry fucking lawler? Cuz i sure the hell didn't until he threatened to kill me" Future Saturn continued "Or that Festivia comes from pie island and is a pirate like jack sparrow"

"I am?!" Festivia tilted her head as Saturn walked down the ramp, sliding into the ring "

"ADD ME TO THE MATCH GLIM! I'M FUCKING FUMING!" Malenko spoke

"LANGUAGE!" Eclipsa shouted

"I'm, I'm getting word that GM is allowing future Saturn to be added to the match" JR said shocked as the bell rang Malenko jumped to Kane's shoulders and hit a huricanrana

"Hurricanrana!" JR shouted before Saturn got in the ring and hit his counterpart with the chair, Malenko screaming in pain before slowly getting up and kicking Saturn in the chin

"Superkick" Corey said as Kane sat straight up, getting hit with a dropkick by Star, Malenko getting up and getting out of the ring, a look of insanity in his eyes as he grabbed a chair himself from the crowd, he starred at star before setting up the chair and running up it like Sabu and hitting a 450 senton splash on his younger self before they both kipped up, younger Saturn going for Star but then got hit in the back with his own chair by milenko before being irish whipped into a corner, Kane standing up only to be irish whipped into the same corner, slamming against Conner

"HOLY SHIT!" Festivia dropped her facade and her drink "THIS GUYS CRAZY!"

"...no shit festivia" Corey replied

Saturn walked to the two and picked them up, AT THE SAME TIME and set up a Tombstone before jumping and hitting the tombstone

"TOMBSTONE TO KANE AND CONNOR!" JR shouted before Saturn looked at Star , the princess backing up

"Star, you wanna help your uncle with these two?" Saturn asked Star

"YOU'RE EVIL!" Mina shouted

"...Yeah uncle Saturn" She smiled and hit a swanton on Kane before Connor kipped up and tried to superkick saturn, his leg getting grabbed and put into an ankle lock to strain his younger counterpart's stamina, Star then rolling Kane out of the ring, Undertaker holding Jasper back

"He's gonna be fine" Taker said "no matter how bad it gets, You can't interrupt"

The Saturn's watched as Star rolled Kane and dived out to help push him into the grave and began to bury him Together

Saturn then took his shovel and slammed it in Connor's back right on the wings before beggining to choke him out with the handle, folding him by the knees before releasing him and slamming the shovel into his back again, he then grabbed Star and threw her to the side

"I don't want you getting hurt…..I know you'll be fine if you do, and you're damn good with magic…...but I'm dangerous" Saturn explained kicking his past self in the jaw

He ran back to the ring and reached under it, grabbing a trashcan that had a barb kendo stick, a sledgehammer, a bat'leth and a two by four, throwing it into the ring before being grabbed by mina

"Star, You grab the other freak!" Mina instructed before being hit with a snap mare by milenko

"This kid, Milenko…..is a bulldozer!" JR said as Past Saturn got up and Smacked Star with a shovel, breaking it

"STAR!" Future Saturn shouted before looking at Eclipsa "Hi mom"

"H-hello Saturn" Eclipsa stuttered as Saturn ran at Connor and hit an RKO, pushing him into a grave and began to bury him under dirt

"Star…... it's down to me…..and you, do you know what that means?" Saturn asked

"...I'm not fighting you" She replied

"No shit…..we won" he smirked, Kane reaching his arm out of the dirt like a zombie as Festivia and Eclipsa ran to dig out Past Saturn, Future Saturn fading

"Bye guys, call me! My line's 555-315-1227!" Saturn faded

(Mewni, Monster Temple)

Eclipsa, holding an unknown baby, Star, Marco and Moon stood in the temple as a solarian mina stood in gigantic mech sized knight armor

"No if you don't mind moon, i'm gonna need you to scoot to the side a little" Mina motioned with her hand

"I- wait what?" Moon asked

"You know, just scoot a little so I don't accedntially getcha when I run her through with my sword and all" Mina waved her solarian sword

"WHAT!" Star shouted grabbing Eclipsa and the baby

"That won't be neccasary Mina" Moon expressed

"DIPDOWN! DIDOW, DIOW!" The baby shouted before Saturn fell from the ceiling

"GAH! FUCK, MY BACK!" Saturn shouted "...Hey mina, you just get back from Kenny's house?"

"ATUR!" The baby smiled

"Who the heck is this dingdong?" Mina asked

"...I have no Idea" Star replied

"ATUR!" The baby shouted

"...Ok, Star, Marco, situation, go" He huddled with the two

"Um, Mina wants to kill all the monsters" Star explained

"Same shit different day, got it…" Saturn nodded and released the two,

"Mina…..what would Solaria think about this?" he asked sitting down and texting his grandmother before being called

"She'd love this! She hated these filthy monsters!" Mina shouted back

"...hi gran" He picked up "Dimensions…..uhhm, Moon what timeline is this?" Saturn asked

"...12345ab" She answered

"12345ab…..NO DON'T BRING MINA AND KENNY! ….DON'T BRING MATT AND NICK EITHER…..NO GRAN…...NO BULLET CLUB MEMBERS, NO! NO FESTIVIA EITHER! GOD IF MY LIL PIRATE SISTER GOT HURT I'D…..JUST YOURSELF GRAN, I LOVE YOU TOO…..NO DON'T BRING GLIM!" Saturn said before a portal opened and Solaria walked out

"No way!" Star said

"M-mother?" Eclipsa asked

"Hello my little snookers bar" Solaria smiled

"H-how? How did you raise her from the dead?!" Mina asked

"Mina Stand down,...I was wrong" She looked to the side

"NEVER! I SWORE AN OATH TO FIGHT MONSTERS IN YOUR NAME!" Mina replied

"MONSTERS AREN'T EVIL!" Solaria shouted back

"...Mother…" Eclipsa smiled and teared up

"What would Kenny think of this? Or Nick? Or Matt? Or Balor? You think Balor would approve of this?!" Solaria began "He wouldn't you racist piece of shit, you're putting my grandbabies in danger! Poor Meteora is clinging to her mother! Saturn, my dimension's meteora has done everything to stop this kind of shit!"

"M-MY QUEEN, I'M SO SORRY!" Mina cried "BUT I HAVE TO GO THROUGH WITH THIS!" She smiled

"Mina…...you have become the very thing you swore to destroy….a monster, not on the outside….but the inside" Solaria crossed her arms

"That's….deep" marco said

"I'm not a monster, if anything you're a traitor to your own cause!" Mina shouted

"Your oath was to protect mewni, not attack it's people" Solaria replied "YO-YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A BITCH!"

"ATLEAST MY DAUGHTER ISN'T A MONSTER SMOOCHER!" Mina shouted back

"...can I just shoot her?" Saturn asked

"No, she may be crazy but she's still my best friend Saturn" Solaria said

"I'm not crazy! You're the crazy one!" Mina shouted back before Festivia walked through a portal with Kenny

"...FESTIVIA DON'T BRING HER BOYFRIEND HERE!" Saturn shouted

"Festivia?" Eclipsa tilted her head

"Boyfriend? This twig?" Mina asked "I bet he can't even fight!" She began to laugh

"...Kenny beat My grandma" Festivia said

"That's why i'm the best, I'm the greatest! I'm a triple threat, I'm a shit talker, i'm a soilder, and i'm a lover! Oh yeah!" He winked "YOU WANT TO MASSACRE, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE CLEANER!"

"Ha, you and what army?" Mina asked

"Show her" Solaria smiled

"...Yo, you didn't!" Saturn fangirled as the portal opened and the Bullet club, excluding AJ Styles, Cody, Mina and the Sailor Scouts, walked out with Abyss and the DWO excluding Star

"These freakazoids?" Mina asked before Saturn ran and jumped, hitting loveberry with a hurricanrana out of the suit and torward the group

"What the flip?" Mina got up "Tshat's it, i-"

The young bucks ran and superkicked mina before Kenny grabbed her legs and lifted her up

"...Meteora? What have you done?" Eclipsa looked at her daughter

"Di dow!" She smiled

"Ha, I have your legs!" Kenny said "Now normally i'd have a problem fighting my little loveberry, but you're an evil counterpart!"

"What are you saying you pesky hunk?!" Mina asked before getting hit with a one winged angel which crashed through the floor

"Hey! Chill!" Saturn said before balor ran into the room

"We'll deal with the others" Crissy said before frontflipping down the temple

"...We'll also take the stairs…..I can't fly" Kane explained before walking down stairs

"What's this we?" Pink asked jumping down as Kenny and his fellow bullet club members beat mina

"...This, this is just fucking stupid…..I'm sorry, but this is fucking stupid" Saturn walked away

"I WON'T STOP UNTIL EVERY MONSTER AND MONSTER SMOOCHER IS DEAD! ESPECIALLY GLOBGORE!" Mina shouted

"Oh?" Balor smiled "Why didn't you say so?" he snapped and in a cloud of smoke transformed to his true form, a white haired demon looking creature with red tiger striped skin and two pair of eyes, he wore nothing but a speedo

"Dad….you look like ricardo milo!" Saturn covered his eyes

"WHAAAAAAT?' Mina stood up "this is impossible! If you're globgore….where's your scar?!"

"He does look like ricardo milo" Matt joked

"Can it jackso-" He then coughed up a whole onion "That was in there for a DECADE!" he said with a soft spanish accent

"IF KILLING ME WILL MAKE YOU LEAVE MY FAMILY ALONE….DO IT!" Globgore said "THEY'RE ALL I CARE ABOUT!"

"Finally! A monster has a good idea!" Mina smiled

"...he's distracting her…..run" Saturn whispered "Get your timeline's Da- Globgore and run" he instructed Star, Moon, Marco and Eclipsa who did so

"...If you try we'll kill you" Kenny told Mina as Starlight poked her head through a portal next to saturn

"Saturn…..Derpy had to go home….her filly's sick" Starlight explained "we've been recording and broadcasting your adventure after solaria's match….Mina, how'd you like a street fight against Saturn? Last consious wins"

"Who?" Mina asked

"That's Saturn…... my son" Globgore patroniesed

"...You're a dick, you know that?" Nick asked

"A MONSTER SMOOCHER BABY?! I'LL SLAUGHTER HIM!" Mina shouted

"Come through this portal then" Starlight smiled as Moon, Eclipsa, Star and Marco tried to sneak off

"MOON! ECLIPSA! COMMENTARY!" Starlight shouted

"Excuse me?" Eclipsa asked

"sorry…...I thought you were another timeline's Eclipsa and Moon…...go do what you were doing" She waved them off with her hoof "Moon…..would you be up for commentary for a wrestling show?"

"Well….can Star and Marco come with me?" Moon asked

"A-HEM!" Eclipsa held up Meteora

"...and Eclipsa and her daughter?" Moon added

"Fine…...but this is a one time thing….also, wear a bandana or a different hairstyle so we can tell you guys apart" Starlight said "Where's your eclipsa?"

"With a festivia…..who is textbook festivia and not cool lil sis festivia" Saturn explained "...I could call her"

"Ok, just tell her, and Festivia if she's clingy I want my mommy but she was 'eaten' fest and not gurlfriend fest" Starlight said as Saturn texted

"...they'll be there" Saturn nodded

(WOOOOO, LONGEST CHAPTER EVER? MAYBE….MAYBE NOT!)