Holy shit.
Guys . . . we're here. Over a year later, we're finally here!
Oh man, this is just . . . christ! I mean, there's an epilogue after this, but the actual story itself is . . . finished! Holy shit guys!
But don't think this means the end, my friends. There are sequels in store! Although, it may take some time for that, because I have to hammer out the details and, joy of joys, school has started! Huzzah!
Anyway, before slavery begins anew, I wanted to leave this with you. I hope you brought tissues.
Enjoy.
Obligatory Disclaimer: I own nothing except my OCs.
My Sanctuary
I sat up with a start, heart pounding as the nightmare settled.
No . . . not a nightmare. It was real. I remembered everything! Evangeline, the platform, every encounter I'd had there!
And . . . my last one . . .
I leaned forward and pressed a hand to my aching head, taking long, deep breaths as I tried to slowly process everything I had learned. Even so, it was overwhelming.
I was . . . a Nobody. And not just any Nobody, but the Nobody of a girl who'd had my mother's name. Except it wasn't my mom's name, it had never been. And my mom, she'd been there too, somehow! Was she really my mom, though? Did I have a right to call her that?
And that wasn't even the worst half of it! The very idea that not only was my life not my own, but that it was being controlled by an unknown force was enough to send chills down my spine. And how did I go about finding out who it was?
. . . Eri. He had known something, hadn't he? Hell, he might have even known everything! But he was gone, having slipped through my fingers like smoke once more.
What did I do about this now?
But you have an advantage. They don't know you know the truth. And . . not every memory is fake. This journey you went on, like you said, is your own. The places you went, the people you met, all of that was real. Keep those memories close, Hikari, because those are the proof that you are you. And those bonds will be the things that will guide you back to your home . . . and to your heart.
Evangeline's last words rang in my head, and I clung to them like a child to a security blanket. That was real. I was real.
I repeated that sentence over and over again in my head, a mantra that soothed the ache away, allowed me to get control of myself again. With a shaky sigh, I placed a hand over my heart and felt it beat beneath my palm, savoring the feeling, letting the gentle cadence remind me of myself.
When at last I felt like I had a decent handle on my emotions (because I had emotions. I'm not just nothing), I gingerly opened my eyes and looked around.
Dark, that was what I saw. And . . . lots of rocks. Where was I?
Carefully, I rose to my feet, eyes peeling apart the shadows in search of enemies. Fortunately, it looked like I was on my own here. Everything was still.
I became aware of something hard in my clenched hand. Eyebrows furrowed, I lifted it up and looked.
Evangeline's necklace sat there in my palm, as solid and real as I. A sad frown tweaked my lips down, shoulders drooping as I thought of my Somebody and how she'd just disappeared. Huh, ironic, wasn't it? That the one not born of nothing would be the one to vanish. Even if she'd told me it was inevitable, that it was the way it was supposed to be . . .
She'd sacrificed her existence for me, I realized with a jolt. Her cold words had been nothing more than an attempt to rile me and get the response she wanted, to teach me what I needed to know. And as a result of that . . .
I held out my other hand and watched as Origin flashed into existence. I sensed great power thrum through it, so great it felt unreal. But it was real, and it was mine. Because of Evangeline. And now she was gone, too.
Huh, all along, I thought as my eyes trailed along the keychain, I had you with me the entire time . . .
Biting my lip, I banished the beautiful blade from existence, feeling no sense of victory for this achievement, not right now. Not when someone's life had been given for it.
But there was some proof with me that she had existed. The necklace in my hand.
I debated and moralized for only a few seconds before I undid the hook on the ends and carefully wound it around my neck, feeling the weight hang heavy against my chest as I clipped it into place. It was more than just a pretty trinket. It was Evangeline's life, her heart, and her spirit.
And I saw no reason to not try to keep some of that alive.
That done, I looked around and set upon my new task.
Finding my way out of here. Back home.
My feet moved of their own accord, and I let them lead me. Everywhere was strange, and I had no map to guide me, so I might as well just follow my gut and see where it led. Sometimes, I heard skittering in the shadows, saw a gleam of yellow in the dark. But as soon as I summoned Origin, the creatures would flee back into the darkness and disappear. It felt like I walked forever, and the more I pressed forward, the more aware I became of just how lonely this place was. And in turn, just how alone that made me feel.
After everything, I wanted nothing more than to see my friends again. See their smiles, hear their voices, and revel in the feeling of being home again. For they were my home now, I knew. No other home waited for me anywhere else. They must be worried . . . I was bound to get an earful once I got back . . .
I'd have to tell them the truth, too, was my unspoken conundrum. But this time, I was resolved to do it. No more secrets. And, strangely, I didn't feel as nervous about it. I mean, I was still nervous, scared shitless even. Not everyday you tell the most precious people in your lives you're not who they thought you were. But keeping something like this to myself would serve no one, and cause problems way down the line.
Trust . . . I had to trust in them like they trusted in me . . . I wouldn't make that mean nothing.
Just as soon as I found my way out of here . . .
After some time of aimless wandering in places that looked no different from the other places I'd been, I did eventually come across something that was.
A beach. A . . . very strange beach, certainly not one I'd recommend for a vacation. The black sand led all the way down to a shore washed with waves of inky water, the ocean beyond looking slick and oily in the dark light of the moon that hung suspended above it. Arches of tide-slicked stone jutted out over the water, looking eerily similar to fingers dipping their tips into the water. Their towering forms cast long shadows across the beach, crisscrossing in many places like a phantasmal web.
But the crashing of the waves was soothing, and if I closed my eyes, I could almost pretend I was back on Destiny Islands . . .
"Hikari?!"
The distant voice brought me back, and I stared down the shore in puzzled bewilderment. That had sounded like . . . but it couldn't be, could it?
Then I saw. Close by the water's edge were two shapes I'd missed in my cursory glance, one who was now springing to their feet and running toward me while the other remained seated. As they drew closer, the shadows seemed to part, and my heart swelled when at last his face became clear.
"Sora!" I shouted, an overjoyed smile crossing my face as I broke into a run.
"Hikari, what are you doing here?" I heard him ask, his pace slowing as we neared eachother.
I didn't slow down. I didn't slow down at all, and before Sora or even I really knew what was happening, I slammed into him with enough force to topple us both into the sand, arms wrapped tight around his neck and face buried in his chest.
Any other time, I would have died from embarrassment. Hell, I never would have even attempted to try this. But right now, I did not care. All I cared about was holding on as tightly as I could, savoring the warmth I feared I might never find again. The warmth that I'd almost willing allowed to slip away.
"Ow . . ." I heard him mumble, and I felt him shift as he pushed himself up into a sitting position, hands braced against the sand. I didn't let go.
A hand was placed on my shoulder, "Hikari, are you okay? What's wrong?"
The concern in his voice drew me out of my languid state, and I reluctantly pulled away. Smiling sheepishly, I rubbed the back of my neck and lowered my head, "I'm fine, Sora. Just . . . happy."
"I don't get it, weren't you supposed to be with the others?" Sora asked, looking me up and down like he thought I would disappear at any moment. A second later, he abashedly scratched the side of his cheek and added, "N-not that I'm not happy to see you too, but . . ."
I shook my head, "It's okay, Sora. I'll . . . explain."
I glanced down to where the other figure, Riku, I realized, still sat, watching us intently and looking as if he could join us. Could he not? Was he hurt?
"Maybe . . . we should join Riku first?" I suggested quietly. Maaaybe it was prolonging the inevitable, but . . . I was nervous. How did I even start?
He looked back, then nodded, "Okay, sure."
He stood up and extended a hand, one I accepted gratefully. We went to where Riku was waiting, the sound of waves growing louder, more constant. It was . . . comforting.
"Everything alright?" Riku asked as soon as we neared.
"I . . .think so," Sora said, but he looked at me for confirmation.
"I'm not hurt, if that's what you're worried about," I reassured them, "Just . . . lost."
"We all are, in a way," Riku explained. He gestured with his chin to the dark land behind me, "This is the Realm of Darkness."
I blinked and followed his gaze, "The Realm of Darkness, huh? Can see why they call it that."
"We got stuck here after fighting Xemnas. How'd you get here, Hikari?" Sora asked, looking at me curiously.
"Yeah, you should have been taken to safety with the others when the portal closed," Riku added.
"Wait, Xemnas?" I started, looking between the two "Didn't we take care of him before that happened?"
"He tricked us," Riku said.
"But he's gone for good now, so no need to worry about that," Sora jumped in. Then, he placed his hands on his hips, "Buuut, that still doesn't explain how you got here. Quit holdin' out on us, Hikari!"
It was meant to be playful, but for all it's lightheartedness, I couldn't stop myself from biting my lip and looking down, a sudden vertigo of anxiety making it hard to think straight. But I had to tell them.
I stayed silent a tad too long, for both boys looked at each other, eyebrows creased with worry. Sora stepped forward, "Hikari?"
I let out a sigh, "Let's . . . sit down first. It's . . . a long story."
Another look was exchanged, but Sora did as I asked, taking a seat beside his friend. I sat on his other side, and, after a quiet moment of gathering my thoughts, I opened my mouth and told them my tale.
I kept my eyes on the horizon, watching the moonlight dance along the waves as the story fell from my lips. From beginning to end, Cloak to Evangeline, and . . . the truth of who I was. I never looked away from the water, so I didn't see Sora's eyes gradually getting wider, nor Riku's quiet, yet contemplative stare, absorbing the story in their own ways.
"And that's . . . how I got here," I finished quietly. At some point, my hand had gone up to finger the necklace around my neck, feeling the grooves in the gem and finding it strangely calming.
At first, neither of them spoke, the only sound the waves cresting against the sand.
"So . . ." Sora started tentatively, as if he were treading over glass, "What the Organization was saying . . . was true? You're really a . . . ?"
I nodded once, voice barely a whisper, "Yeah . . ." I looked away, giving a short, sad laugh, "Sorry . . . you must be disappointed that I'm not who you thought I was . . ."
"I didn't say that," Sora said with a shake of his head.
"The things Evangeline told you . . . you don't think she's lying?" That practical question came from Riku.
"I don't see what she'd have to gain from it. Especially now," I responded, eyes still on the sand, drawing idle circles in it with my finger, "So, no, I don't think she was lying."
"I see . . ."
Silence, nearly suffocating, and it was all I could do not to choke and have a panic attack then and there.
Then, "Don't let yourself get eaten up by it."
For the first time since I'd started talking, I looked at Riku, noting the small, yet comforting, smile on his face as he spoke, "Like I said before, even if you were a Nobody, it wouldn't matter. You've proven where your heart is. So don't worry about it."
My shoulders sagged a bit, heart feeling a little but lighter at that. But . . .
I hesitantly turned my gaze to Sora, looking like a puppy who'd been caught rifling through the trash and now awaited the master's verdict.
Sora's eyes were clouded, expression curiously unreadable. But when he met my stare, it held no anger or disgust, only a strangely calm acceptance, "I . . . to be honest, that stuff is all kinda hard to believe. Like, really, kinda hard. But . . . I do believe that you're my friend, and I don't want that to change! So . . . we won't change, right?"
I almost laughed at the question. Here I was, revealing that I was not in fact the person they thought I was, and yet Sora was the one asking me that? Like he was the one who'd just told the secret? Really . . .
"No Sora," I said with a smile, answering him regardless, "We won't."
"That's good!" he said with look of relief.
My smile grew a touch wider, heart feeling much lighter than before and not so cluttered, and with a gratitude I could never truly express in words, I whispered, "Thank you."
"Hm?"
I shook my head, "Nothing."
I looked around until I caught Riku's eye, "So, I don't suppose there's a way out of here."
"Not that I know of," he responded, a shadow of regret crossing his face.
"It's fine though!" Sora cut in with a chipper smile, revelations pushed aside and forgotten, "Our friends on the other side are safe now, so it doesn't matter if we're stuck here!"
"Is that so . . ." I mused, staring back out over the water. It was true, the threat from Organization XIII had been removed. But it didn't . . . seem right to just sit down and relax. There was still a lot I didn't know, and something told me it could be a danger if left unchecked, perhaps even greater than Xemnas.
Before I could contemplate it further, however, Sora's voice cut into my thoughts with a question,
"Hey, Hikari . . . could you sing us a song?"
My eyes fell on him in disbelief, though I kept my face a careful neutral as I studied him. He looked away, blushing, "It's quiet here, so I thought it would . . . be nice . . . and things . . . please don't hit me."
Behind him, Riku raised an amused eyebrow.
Sing them a song? He asks that like it's easy for me. But then, it sort of was . . . if I pretended no one was around, which there kind of weren't. And he was right, it was quiet here save for the ocean. Some would call it a 'perfect atmosphere' for singing.
And . . . perhaps I could ease up just once . . . just to say 'thank you' without having to speak. And there was a song I could use here . . . a song about home. Somehow . . . it seemed right.
Both boys were silent, now staring out over the water, and it was clear neither expected anything from me at this point. I could only imagine the surprise on their faces when I closed my eyes and started to sing;
"In you and I, there's a new land. Angels in flight . . . my sanctuary . . . my sanctuary, yeah. Where fears and lies, melt away. Music inside. What's left of me . . . what's left of me now . . ." I let the song flow like words from my soul, setting them free like birds trapped too long in a cage, "I watch you, fast asleep. All I fear . . . means nothing . . ."
"In you and I, there's a new land. Angels in flight . . . my sanctuary . . . my sanctuary, yeah. Where fear's and lies, melt away . . . Music inside . . . what's left of me. What's left of me . . ." the music in my mind slowed and swelled, a tempo that matched the beating of my heart, "You showed me, how to see, that nothing is whole and, nothing . . . is broken! In you and I, there's a new land! Angels in flight . . . my sanctuary . . . my sanctuary, yeah! Where fears and lies, melt away! Music inside . . . what's left of me . . . what's left of me, now . . ."
My voice softened, falling as the song fell, slow like the water that lapped at my feet, "My fears, my lies . . . melt away . . . aaaaaah . . ."
"I need more affection than you know."
I opened my eyes and breathed, the silence washing over me again as my song ended. Feeling a soft flush of heat to my cheeks, I glanced to where Sora and Riku sat, and blinked when I saw that none of them were looking at me. Instead, both of them had leaned back, faces upturned to the sky, eyes closed and faces peaceful, relaxed, absorbing rather than listening.
Smiling, I leaned back as well, deciding against disturbing the tranquility, at least for a while. Later, I'd get these boys off their asses and start looking for a way out, for I had no intention of just sitting here without getting some answers. Proper answers.
But for now, Realm of Darkness or not, I'd enjoy what peace there was. After all that had happened, I believed I was in my right to say I deserved it.
"Sora?" Riku's voice broke the stillness, and I curiously looked over as the silver-haired boy handed his friend a thin piece of brown parchment, "I think it's for you."
I pursed my lips and subconsciously leaned a little closer as Sora straightened the paper out. I wondered where Riku had found it . . .
"Thinking of you, wherever you are . . ." Sora's voice trailed away, eyes slowly traveling over the page as they flicked from word to word, and his face seemed to grow softer with every line.
I read the message myself over his shoulder, curiosity overwhelming my restraint, and as the sentences flew by, a warm smile slowly started to spread.
We pray for our sorrows to end, and hope that our hearts will blend.
Now I will step forward and realize this wish.
And who knows:
Starting a new journey may not be so hard!
Or perhaps it has already begun.
There are many worlds, but they all share the same sky.
One sky-
One destiny.
Kairi.
Light flooded my vision, and I looked up in startled wonder as a doorway made of luminous radiance split apart the shadows of the sea and opened before us. With a surge of excitement, I sprang to my feet, needing no explanation as to what it was. I already knew. I could feel it in my heart, a gentle tug that pulled me in it's direction, guiding me to the one place I wanted to be most.
Home.
"Light," Riku breathed, eyes remaining locked on the portal.
"The door to light . . ." Sora whispered, staring.
Then, the brown-haired boy climbed to his feet, the light making the hope and the joy in his eyes shine even brighter as he switched the message to his other hand and held the free one out to Riku, "We'll go together!"
He glanced at me, "All of us."
I smiled at that and gave him an affirmative nod, "Course."
At the same time, Riku grabbed Sora's hand and allowed his friend to pull him to his feet, "Yeah."
As one, we turned to the light, unafraid. Then we walked, heads held high as the water swirled around our ankles, the light steadily growing brighter, banishing the darkness that nipped at our heels.
I honestly could not tell you what happened next. In one instant, I was walking side by side with my friends. The next, I was suddenly falling headfirst through the clouds, with seemingly no transition between them. But I felt no fear. Instead, I felt at ease, at peace, watching the clouds zip by, leaving the sky behind as we plummeted to he waters below. Our descent ended in a loud splash and a cloud of bubbles, the water closing over my head as the waves caught me in it's hold.
With quick, strong strokes, burgeoned up by the water itself like it wanted us to find air, I broke the surface, shaking the water out of my eyes and trying not to swallow the salt-tinged liquid as I looked at my new surroundings.
Blue sky, tinged with sunset and sprinkled with fading clouds, the half-sunken sun sparkling gold along the azure waves that bobbed gently around us. Overhead, a seagull cried loud and clear, soaring overhead on white wings. Familiar surroundings . . .
"Sora! Riku!"
"Hikari!"
I spun around, water sloshing over my arms when I heard those warm, achingly familiar voices. There in the distance, on an island I'd only ever seen from far away, I saw them. Kairi, Donald, Goofy, the King, Mari-all of them! Waving their hands over their heads, jumping and shouting and cheering!
With a shared glance of excitement, the three of us began to paddle towards them, pushing through the water, our eagerness giving us wings. I felt my hand graze against the sandy banks below the water, the grains soft against my skin, and I jabbed my feet into it. Water sucked at my clothes and threatened to pull me down, but my joy mixed with my determination to make it back home kept me up on my feet, legs slogging as quickly as I could through the cold waves.
Several people were already splashing out to meet us. Donald and Goofy, faces filled with boundless elation, dove onto Sora, who failed to support their weight and they all went crashing down into the water with a splash. The duo pulled Sora up a moment later, embracing him and pressing their faces against his own and laughing!
Mickey shot by the trio like a bullet, as if he couldn't get fast enough to the silver-haired boy behind them. He sprang and Riku caught the mouse with ease, spinning him around, smiling hugely as the pain of separation eased and disappeared.
The next thing I knew, I was on my back as well, choking on sea water but finding it impossible to be angry. Mari wrapped her arms around my shoulders like a vice, squeezing and squeezing like I could vanish at any moment. And I'd very nearly done that to her. How selfish of me . . .
She was crying, I realized. Crying and yelling 'stop disappearing, you idiot!' before the words were choked back by tears. My best friend Mari, with a heart bigger than any world I'd seen and who had stuck by my side even when she'd had no personal stake in the matter at all.
Smiling, I returned the embrace, holding onto what I'd almost given up in my darkest moment. And if anyone saw the tears I shed then, I'd tell them it was saltwater.
She sat back and wiped at her eyes, and when she looked up, a smile was on her face, "Next time, take me with you, okay? You need someone to back you up."
Still smiling, I leaned closer and pressed my forehead against hers, voice soft and unusually gentle, "Promise."
Keep those memories close, Hikari, because those are the proof that you are you. And those bonds will be the things that will guide you back to your home . . .
Evangeline's words echoed through my mind like a soft and gentle chime. With one hand, I reached up and clasped the necklace tight, wondering, hoping, that maybe if I squeezed hard enough, she could feel what I felt now.
Mari gripped my hand in her own, and just over her shoulder, I saw Sora and the duo look back at us, the largest, happiest grin I'd ever seen practically taking up his whole face. Mari and I returned the gesture, and when Sora turned away, I saw him rifle through his pockets and pull out the thalassa shell charm I'd seen him hold in his hand the day I'd first met him. Unbidden, my free hand reached down and pulled up the one that had been clipped to my bag. The violet petals were lined with droplets, pearled beads of water dripping from it's tips, but that only made it more beautiful in my opinion. An orange one suddenly appeared in my line of sight, and I looked up to see Mari smiling meaningfully at me as she pressed the ends of two petals together.
By the shore, Sora had turned to Kairi, who was looking down at him with soft, fond smile, wiping his eye as he exclaimed, "We're . . . w-we're back!"
Kairi merely held out her hand to him, and though her voice was soft, I heard it just the same;
"You're home."
And to your heart.
And when Sora reached out to clasp that outstretched hand in his own, the thalassa shell pressed between them, I knew Evangeline had spoken the truth.
~To Be Continued~
Thank you for this truly magical journey, all of you.
And I wish you all an absolutely marvelous day.
Until next time.
