Back at school Hermione could almost pretend that she was not the product of a dark ritual that sacrificed 5 people. She hid away from everyone and buried herself in school work. Her sister and the marauders tried to give her space, only dragging her out of the library to eat or go to bed at night. Remus was given a brief explanation but Lily regretfully informed him that they just didn't know what the Yuletide revelations meant. Amelia, however, refused to leave her table no matter how many times she was snapped at and asked to leave.
"Look, I don't know what's with you but you have to see that you're hurting them." Amelia hissed in frustration after nearly a week of those Gryffindors hastily changing the subject when Hermione's moodiness came up in conversation.
"I don't know what your talking about. I'm studying for exams." Hermione huffed, not bothering to look up from the charms book in her hands.
"You can lie to me all you want but don't lie to yourself. Something happened over hols. James and Sirius aren't running around like the berks they are, Lily only comes to the library at curfew, you haven't smiled in days." Amelia said in a quiet but firm tone, placing her hand over Hermione's book. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to but you've got to stop hiding."
"Listen...I can't.." Hermione's voice cracked as she stared at the pale hand blocking the words. It was the only thing that drowned out the constant thoughts, her nightmares were worse than ever and she didn't even bother to save them anymore. All she wanted to do was forget.
"Whatever it is...is it really worth you not living your life?" Amelia asked quietly and reached for Hermione's hand, gently pulling at her fingers to loosen her clenched fist.
"Ami...what if...I wasn't supposed to be here. I wasn't meant to be born...if I told you it was dark magic that was my very reason for being." Hermione whispered, staring down at her lap. When she attempted to pull her hand away the Hufflepuff refused to let go.
"Are you practicing the dark arts?" Amelia said slowly with an arched brow, tapping her palm in an attempt to force Hermione to meet her concerned gaze,
"No...I mean, I've learned about them and I seem to have an unhealthy knowledge of them but..." Hermione faltered as she looked up to find Amelia looking at her with so much compassion. The redhead felt her eyes get misty with traitorous tears and she sniffed.
"Are you planning on being the next dark lady or running in the halls torturing first years? Maybe leading your reign with an army of house elves and idiot marauders...although, your older sister could definitely put the fear of Merlin into some of those death eaters." Amelia pressed seriously, almost cracking a smile at the mental image of her only muggle friend on a tirade.
Hermione's head snapped up at she stared at her friend for a moment before bursting into laughter. "No! What the fuck, Ami?!"
"Then obviously dark magic is not your reason for being. I mean, a lot of people want to put a label on magic but...it's all about intent. It's all magic and its up to the user to decide what they are. My mother used blood magic when she was pregnant. She suffered so many miscarriages that she just wanted to make sure I lived...does that make me a product of dark magic? After all, I probably wouldn't be here if she hadn't done it." Amelia whispered softly, Hermione was silent for a moment before launching herself across the table to pull her into a tight hug. She wasn't sure how long they stayed like that but the redhead felt like she a small weight was taken from her shoulders.
"Thank you." Hermione whispered into her hair, giving the Hufflepuff another squeeze. As she rested her chin on Amelia's shoulder, she noticed Severus watching her closely. His obsidian eyes were filled with regret and concern. For a brief moment she considered going to talk to him but quickly squashed that thought. He was no longer her friend, no longer the boy in silly silk shirts that poured over crumbling tomes in their attic and made snarky comments.
-0-
"You know, Snape, those mudbloods are looking quite delicious these days." Nott said airily as he watched his house mate staring down one of the infamous twins. Their friendship through the first five years of Hogwarts bemused some of Slytherin while somehow personally insulted the rest. Severus shrugged noncommittally, turning back to his work. "Your spell creations have been a real hit at the revels. He is getting very interested in meeting you."
"I hope to meet him this summer." Severus said quietly, not taking his eyes off his work. Inside he was vibrating with excitement, it was no question just who his housemate was talking about. He was never mentioned by name but it was a rite of passage for the most talented Slytherins to meet him.
"I know, Ruddy has been raving about that slashing hex. Even showed him what you did to that mudblood last year." Nott's grin was feral while he pretended not to notice the sudden paleness to Severus's sunken cheeks. It was so easy to rile the potions prodigy.
"Too bad she was healed." Severus whispered, tasting bile on his tongue and his eyes traveled to Hermione laughing with the Hufflepuff. He forced himself to look back at his books before his housemate noticed. It was never a good idea to let a Slytherin know your weakness.
"Yes, I didn't know there was a counter...I was under the impression you created it." Nott pressed eagerly, leaning close with an expectant look on his face.
"I did but I'm not quite sure how My-I never came up with a counter." Severus said dismissively with a shrug of his shoulders. He never questioned Hermione's uncanny ability to just know things, if anything he exploited it in their youth. It was one of the many things he missed about their friendship, she was always so patient and kind to him.
"Clever little bitch, I've so been dying to hear her screams. We've been hoping to have twins on the menu at the next revel. Hopefully, you can finish what you started." Nott chuckled darkly as he clapped him on the shoulder. He leaned close so that Severus could feel his hot breath on the shell of his ear as he cooed in a sickeningly sweet voice. "Oh, look it that. Seems like Red misses her snake."
"Wha-?" Severus's head snapped up to find Hermione's emerald eyes staring at him again, for just a moment he could have sworn he saw her features soften. However, it was so brief that in a blink of his eyes she was back to glaring at him harshly. His heart stuttered in his chest and he viciously willed himself to remain unaffected.
"Hmmm, maybe you can get her down to the dungeons...you know Reggie has been swearing up and down that she can't be a mudblood." Nott nudged him with a waggle of his brows, glancing back at Hermione and Amelia as they packed up to leave. "I think he just wants a piece of what his blood traitor brother has."
"She really is a part of a triad, isn't she?" Severus asked bitterly as he turned away from sixth year girls walking arm in arm. His heart twisted painfully in his chest every time he saw one of the girls in the halls. Even when he saw those idiotic marauders leaping to their defense, he still couldn't suppress the longing to be the one fit snugly between the twins. That was his place suddenly filled by his tormentors.
"Never been heard of a mudblood in a triad before...think you could do it, though? We could finally see how dirty her blood really is." Nott smiled cruelly as he leaned back in his chair to watch Severus's reaction.
"I doubt we could get her away from her beloved fiancés." Severus bit out through clenched teeth, feeling the jealousy and hatred boiling inside him as he thought of Potter and Black constantly draped over his childhood friend.
"Well, she's been locking herself away from them for weeks now. It will definitely show our housemates who's side you're really on...and I can win that little bet with Reggie. I just know her blood is thick with mud." Nott sneered as he started to pack away his books, missing Severus's quill snap in his clenched fist. Severus had been watching too and he didn't like what he found. The four Gryffindor sixth years were up to something and he was determined to find out what. Hopefully, it would be enough to win back what he threw away in a fit of rage.
-0-0-0-
I've had a shit day. To make up for it and apologize for the super long wait.
double update.
