A/N: Hey everyone, sorry for the delayed update.
I just wanted to say something in response to a few reviews I've been getting about the level of depression that this fic has descended to. I can't really say too much because I don't want to spoil anything, but I will say that I am a believer in overcoming problems and happy (if realistic) endings. It was a sore spot for me about RTD's writing (especially for DW which is meant to be for kids as much as adults) that so much ended with the basic message of 'Life Sucks!'. I prefer the approach that Don Bluth has (if you've ever seen American Tale, Secret of N.I.M.H., Land Before Time or anything else by him (except Thumbelina and Anastasia), you'll know what I'm talking about) that viewers/readers can handle anything if there is hope. And I do promise you there is hope in this fic.
Enjoy!
Chapter 49
(16th November 2008)
Jack dozed, half lost in soft edged memories of the last time he'd been in a bedroom in this hotel with Michaela. He remembered the soft scent of apples and the smooth feel of her skin under his calloused fingers. He remembered the sweet way she'd tilted her head up to look at him, wide eyed and curious.
"Jack?"
Jack jumped, looking around startled as Ianto's voice was followed by soft knocks on the door. Jack rubbed his eyes and sighed,
"Ianto, go to bed."
"Can't sleep. Besides I need to talk to you."
Jack squirmed in his chair, hearing his spine crack as he straightened up. "Ok, fine."
He got out of the bed, glancing at the still unconscious Michaela as he went to the door. He opened the door and let Ianto inside. Ianto had changed into a t-shirt and tracksuit bottoms and his hair was sticking in every direction.
"Ok, what is it you wanted to talk about?" asked Jack. Ianto didn't answer. He was peering at Michaela with a sad expression. "Ianto!"
Ianto started and looked at him, "Right! Sorry." He licked his lips nervously and stepped closer to Jack, saying quietly, "I've been thinking about… well about everything. Stuff just… well it just doesn't add up."
"What stuff exactly?"
"All of it. Michaela would never do what she did with Connors willingly. And why is she so angry all the time? And that word she said to me… butcher."
"Butcher?"
"Yeah, that's what she said. I thought she meant hurting her emotionally. But… what if she literally meant butcher, like an animal?"
Jack frowned and then his eyes widened, appalled, "The outlined organs!"
"They're all used in organ trafficking. Lungs and heart are especially valuable, and Michaela wrote Blaine in them Owen said."
"But what has this got to do with us?"
"I don't know, but what if Blaine made some threat to her that she never told me? What if he said he'd eventually kill her and sell her organs to some creep?"
"Ianto that's a hell of a conclusion."
"I know, but I've been going over and over it in my head, and what if –what if she thinks we're in on it?"
"Ianto, she's ill, she's not mad."
"I know, but-"
Jack pressed his hand to Ianto's lips. "Ianto, stop. I know you want to fix everything. But you have got to stop. This obsessive drive will only make things worse."
"My best friend hates me and is sick, how could it-"
"Don't. Even. Tempt it!" growled Jack. Ianto nodded and stayed quiet. "Now, go back to bed."
Ianto sighed and glanced around, "I hate being on my own!" he groused.
"Why don't you take the dog with you? You can talk to her." said Jack, slightly joking.
Ianto looked at Dubhtach and said, "Well… call me if Michaela starts to wake so I can bring her back. I doubt Michaela will appreciate if she comes to and finds her dog is gone."
"Ok, go on then."
Ianto turned to Dubhtach and called for her to come. Dubhtach lifted her head but didn't move.
"Come on Dubhtach, come."
Dubhtach whined in her throat and rose to her paws as if it was against her own violation. Ianto sighed, "Ok, lie down Dubhtach. No point in forcing you to come with me."
Jack smiled and nodded, "Bunk with Owen if you're that upset."
"Uh, Jack, are you aware that Tosh hasn't slept in her room here once?"
Jack's eyebrows rose in surprise. "Oh."
"Yup. So… yeah, I think I'd rather take on being alone."
"Ok, try to rest. We'll need all the energy we can I think."
"Ok." Ianto sighed. Jack smiled at his sad eyes and kissed him gently.
"We'll figure this out. Don't worry."
Ianto nodded and left the room. Jack returned on his seat and resumed his vigil. About two hours later, as the sun was beginning to turn the sky grey, Michaela stirred. She shifted on the bed, letting out a soft sigh and then turned her head to the side, while her foot slid to the side under the covers. Then she settled down again and only the movement she made afterwards was the rise and fall of her chest. But Jack knew that it was a good sign, it meant she'd probably slipped from unconscious to sleeping. Another hour passed and Ianto came back,
"I'll take Dubhtach outside so she can do her business." he offered quietly. Jack stretched and heard his spine crack. "Unless you wanna stretch your legs." saidIanto.
"Hmm… well maybe you're right." Jack got out of the chair and said, "I could use some air."
"You won't be long. I can watch her. She probably won't wake up before you get back." said Ianto, stepping fully into the room.
"Ok."
"You'll need a poop bag." said Ianto smiling as Jack pulled a face.
"Right… I'll get one from reception. So many of the people who come here have a dog they tend to keep them on hand."
"I bet none of those people would own a dog as big as Dubhtach." said Ianto, "They probably have the ones that fit in their handbags."
"Yeah, you'd be right."
Ianto grimaced, "They look like rats."
"You're just saying that because you and Micka have a weird thing for giant pets."
"A protest to miniaturisation." said Ianto, smirking.
"Whatever. Come on Dubhtach."
Dubhtach didn't move. Jack sighed,
"Is there some magic word I need to use?"
"Yup. Busy-poop time Dubhtach!"
"Please tell me you're ki-"
Dubhtach climbed off the bed at once and stood at Ianto's feet expectantly. Jack blinked at the dog and then raised his eyebrows at Ianto who grinned,
"You say it and she'll know she has to go with you."
"… God help me. Ok, busy-poop time Dubhtach!"
Ianto laughed as Dubhtach moved to Jack's side and waited. Jack glanced around for a leash,
"You don't need a leash. Just be firm and… well, be the Captain and she'll obey you. Take her outside, she'll do her stuff, clean it up and then tell her to follow you."
"Right."
Jack brought Dubhtach downstairs and the wolfhound did her business. As Jack waited for her to finish, General Oduya and Lieutenant Connors walked up to him.
"Good morning Captain!"
"General." said Jack coolly, wishing Dubhtach would finish up now as Connors glanced at the dog and smirked.
"I can't tell you how glad I am that all that mess is behind us now." said the General.
"Yeah…" Jack thought of the girl in the bed and disagreed that this was over.
"Now, I see you're with Agent Murphy's dog, so you must know where the woman herself is."
"She's unavailable at the moment." said Jack calmly. He refused to look at Connors in case he wound up punching him.
"Ah. Well, when you see her, tell her I wish to talk to her about her setting up a new programme for dog training."
"Dog training?" Jack repeated slowly.
"Indeed. This dog found that bomb after UNIT's best men did not." Oduya gestured at Dubhtach who'd finally straightened her spine and stepped away from her business. "It is very well trained. I think it would be foolish of us both not to take advantage of its skills and get Agent Murphy to train more dogs to do what this one does."
Jack found himself bristling at the repetitive calling of Dubhtach 'it'. The dog had saved them all once and Michaela twice and meant a lot to her. Also,
"You want Michaela to train a bunch of dogs along with travelling between Glasgow, Cardiff and London to make sure we all get along like good little comrades? Doesn't she do enough already?"
"I'm sure she'll be able to handle it."
"Just because she could doesn't mean she should. She's doing plenty already, she shouldn't have to do this as well because you can't be bothered to!"
"Captain, she's the one who trained the dog."
"Then ask her how she did it, but don't try and push her into doing the job for you!"
"We would never-"
"Yeah right!"
Oduya drew himself up with a deep breath, then said stiffly, "Where is Agent Murphy?"
"Unavailable."
"I wish to talk to-"
"Did ye not hear him Oduya?" asked Archie sharply as he strode over, looking like he'd not slept last night. "She's not available at the moment. And don't bother calling her, she won't answer."
"Where is she?" asked Connors a slimy, knowing look on his face.
"She's not well. She's resting." said Archie coolly, his eyes burning with disgust as he looked at Connors. A look that Oduya clearly interpreted as dislike for Connors being the prosecution and thought immature by the look on his face.
"Well when she's able, have her contact us."
"You-"
"We will!" said Archie shifting his foot and crushing Jack's toe. Oduya and Connors walked away. Archie's cheeks coloured as he rounded on Jack and said, "Clean up that shit and get your arse back upstairs! We can't leave you lot alone for two minutes with anyone else can we."
Jack fumed but conceded he'd lost sight of himself. And it was worse when he could almost feel Dubhtach judging him as he cleaned up after her.
"For a lady who makes stool on a pavilion and expects others to clean it up for her you're very judgemental." he said to her as he finished and threw away the bag. Dubhtach lifted her nose into the air and seemed to composedly ignore him until he said, "Follow." which she did obediently.
Back in the room, Jack found Ianto talking to Michaela as he played with her hair. Michaela had rolled onto her side and curled up a little, her hands near her face now.
"She moved when I started talking so… what happened, you look pissed?"
"Oduya wants her to start some training school for dogs on top of everything else! Does UNIT expect her to say yes to everything?"
"Maybe." said Ianto softly as Dubhtach climbed back onto the bed and lay down next to her mistress. "I'm starting to think Michaela has a hard time saying no to them. Probably to keep them from being pissed with us."
"Yeah well Archie's not happy with me for how I reacted to Oduya."
"Who cares? He manipulated her." snapped Ianto.
"Yeah and you were a jackass, it all goes around." said Jack shortly. Ianto flushed and glanced down. Jack sighed and reached out, taking Ianto's hand and tugging him to his feet. He put his arms around Ianto and held him close, saying, "I'm sorry. But… you gotta see you have a responsibility here too."
"I should have listened to you." murmured Ianto, "I should have listened to Owen. Shouldn't have been so relentless with the calls."
"You made a mistake. It's time to fix it."
"How?"
"Right now? We just have to look after her and see what happens when she wakes up."
Ianto nodded into Jack's shoulder and sighed. "I'm so tired of all this fucked up crap."
"I know. So am I. But maybe this is it, maybe this is the last thing we'll have to do."
"I really hope so."
"Go and get something to eat. I'll keep an eye on her."
"Not hungry."
"Go on, and bring me up something when you're done."
Ianto sighed again and nodded, "Ok."
"Did Owen pop in?"
"Called a minute ago, said he was just getting a bite, so he'd be able to look over her properly."
"And you go and do the same."
"Ok. I'm going, I'm going."
~*~
"I'm putting her on a drip." decided Owen. "I'd hoped she'd have woken up on her own and we'd have been able to feed her something. But at this point, I'd rather get some nutrients in her."
"Can you do that here?" asked Jack, scratching Dubhtach's ears as she'd been chased away from the bed by the doctor and had retreated to Jack's side.
"I can do it old fashioned style, no machine to regulate it, but it's not going to do much damage if it's not exactly even. She needs to be fed though. Looks like she's not eaten in days."
"I haven't seen her eat here."
"Neither have I." sighed Owen, shaking his head. "I should have seen she was ill. But I was so desperate for our own problems to stop that I ignored what was right in front of me."
"We all ignored it." said Jack. "But we're here now, and we're trying to help."
"Let's hope it'll be enough."
"It will be. It has to be."
"You need anything?"
"Nah, Ianto's bringing stuff up after he eats."
"Good. Call me if she wakes up, yeah?"
"Yeah. And Owen?"
"Hmm?"
"You hurt Tosh I won't hold Ianto back."
Owen blinked and stared at Jack for a long moment. Then he said quietly, "Noted."
Jack gave him a bright smile and Owen beat a hasty retreat. Jack sat down in his seat again and tried to get comfy. He wished he'd had the foresight to bring a book. Then he wondered if Michaela might've brought one.
Getting up again he went to her suitcase and checked inside, but there was nothing but the t-shirt and jeans that he'd seen before. Jack plucked out the four turtle figures and stared at them for a moment.
'What was someone smoking to come up with ninjutsu wielding, adolescent, mutated reptiles?' he wondered idly. Then he had an idea.
He moved to where Michaela had left her laptop on the dresser and picked it up. It, thankfully, had not been damaged. Using his wrist strap to break through the password, Jack accessed the internet and went looking for episodes of this show to watch. It felt like something he could try to use to connect with Michaela. If she'd brought the toys with her, they must have some importance to her, like that red rocket Ianto thought Jack didn't know about.
He quickly found what he wanted and came to a swift conclusion.
'That is one catchy theme song!'
Ianto came back to find Jack watching the show with some bewilderment. "Enjoying yourself?"
"Trying to understand the appeal. This is just insane… why pizza!?"
"Why does Myfanwy like chocolate?"
"… touché."
Ianto smiled and held out a plate. "Got you some bacon and eggs."
"Thanks." Jack took the plate and lifted the cover. "Do I get coff-"
Ianto set down a mug of coffee with a knowing smirk. Jack grinned, "My hero." Ianto flushed and his smirk became a smile. "How're the others?"
"Gwen won't let Rhys out of her sight. And Tosh and Owen are trying to be discreet. It's hilarious."
"Well, until Micka wakes up, we're not going anywhere. So-"
Jack's words were cut off by a loud gasp as Michaela sat up like she'd just heard an explosion. Jack jumped and the laptop toppled out of his lap, while Ianto knocked over the coffee as he spun around.
"'Kaela!" Ianto cried. Michaela looked at him, her eyes huge, and then at Jack who tried to stay calm. Her eyes then jumped to the IV in her arm and widened to such a degree Jack wondered if they'd fall out. Then she shrieked and ripped it out before either of them could blink. Blood spattered the white sheets and flowed down her arm. "No. Michaela don't-"
Michaela reached under the pillow and pulled out a gun, aiming it straight at Ianto's head. Ianto jumped back as he and Jack both raised their hands. Jack was furious. How had no one found that gun under her pillow?
Clearly this team needed re-training in quite a few areas.
~*~
Owen found Tosh in the tea room curled up with a book.
"Enjoying yourself?"
Tosh looked up and smiled at him. Owen smiled back and slid down beside her. "Yes actually, it's quite good."
Owen smiled and cautiously put his arm around her shoulders. Tosh blushed and kept her eyes on the book. Owen coughed lightly and looked around the room, feeling awkward like a teenager. Despite what Ianto kept singing in his ear whenever he got the chance, the two of them had not gotten further than a few kisses. True, they were sharing a bed, but that was a trust thing more than a relationship thing right now. Tosh was still waiting for Owen to pull the rug from under her feet and stick his tongue out at her, telling her it had all been a joke.
Owen had recently come to the conclusion that he was a total arse.
"How's Michaela?"
"I put her on a drip, but she's still not woken up."
"Maybe she just needs time." said Tosh softly.
"Yeah, I hope so. Ianto's loosing it over her."
Tosh smiled a little, "He cares about her."
"I know, and I have to admit she's grown on me a bit too… although that may be from being around Ianto so much now. But I don't want Ianto going over the edge."
"I don't think he will." said Tosh, setting down her book.
"Why not?"
"Because he's got her to focus on. And he's got you and Jack. He wants to hold it together now."
"Well, let's hope he can."
"Of course he will. He's strong. Just like you."
Owen smiled and pulled Tosh closer so she could lean against him as she read her book.
"Well," hesighed, "I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't wake up until tomorrow."
~*~
"Michaela, put the gun down."
"No!" she snapped clambering out of the bed, all the while keeping the gun pointed at Ianto's head. Jack shifted on his feet, wondering if he could get in front of Ianto. Dubhtach quickly moved to her mistress' side and sat on her haunches as Michaela pressed her back against the wall. Her eyes flew from the door to them to the window and then back. "I knew it! I knew you were with him."
"Who?" asked Jack, although he had an inkling of suspicion.
"Blaine! I knew you were working with him. You think I didn't know he was there?"
"Where? Blaine was near you? What did he do?" asked Ianto trying to step forward but backing up when Michaela took the safety off the gun.
"Don't play dumb with me! I'm not an idiot." she snapped, holding herself steady by pressing her hand to the wall. "I knew he was out there. Every night he was prowling around outside the House. I could hear him, I saw him!"
"You saw him? Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure!"
Jack did not believe her. Actually, no, he believed that she believed in what she saw, but he didn't believe it was real. He did not know much about this Blaine guy, but he doubted that the man had spent every night outside Torchwood House.
"Michaela, why would he be outside the House?"
"So I couldn't run away!" she shrieked, flailing and spattering blood on the walls. "So I was stuck in there until I'd served my purpose."
"What purpose?"
"What purp –the fucking trial! What else? All you cared about was the trial, and now it's over so I've served my purpose. And now you two and Blaine can get rid of me like you planned, like he always planned. Well I won't let you!"
Barely able to walk, Michaela pushed away from the wall and kept the gun pointed at them, but her hand was shaking. "Get out of the way."
Jack didn't move and neither did Ianto. Michaela swayed and ended up holding herself up against the wall again. Ianto leaned forward and reached out a hand, speaking gently,
"Michaela, we're not in league with Blaine, that's… that's impossible. We'd never-"
"You liar!" Michaela jabbed at them with the gun. "I know what you're planning. I know, see!" She grabbed at her t-shirt and lifted it up. Any other time Jack would have made a wise crack about her flashing them, but all he saw was those black drawings of her organs on her pale skin. Owen had not elaborated on how detailed they were. She looked like some sort of anatomical diagram. "I knew what you were planning so I decided to make it easier for you." hissed Michaela, narrowing her eyes at them.
"Easier?" asked Ianto sounding uneasy.
"Yes! If you're gonna gut me and sell me off in pieces… well you may as well know what you're getting."
Jack's eyes widened in disgusted realisation.
Ianto had been right. He'd been completely right.
"Michaela we would never do that!"
"Don't lie to me!" she screamed and the gun, which had been weighing down her arm, was hefted up again so it was pointed at Ianto's head again.
"We're not lying!" said Jack calmly as he raised his hands higher, and wondered what he could say that Michaela would believe. She really did think that he and Ianto were capable of this kind of thinking. Jack tried to imagine what she was thinking, how she was feeling beyond the obvious terror. She was confused, but thought she was clear-headed. She was angry, resentful… and lonely.
Jack could see it, he could almost feel it as it rolled off her. She was convinced no one cared, because she was so lonely, so isolated.
"Michaela, you can trust us-"
"No I can't! Why should I? Everything about you is a lie, one lie and deflection after another. I had to find out everything truthful about you for myself in the Archives. You're a liar and you're more than capable of doing what you're doing so don't tell me you're not!"
"Ok, ok. You're right."
Ianto looked at Jack incredulously, as Jack continued, "I am capable of doing what you think I'm doing, retconning you, killing you… I could do it. I'm capable, yes. But I would never do it! And never to you."
"Oh right." Michaela sneered, "'Never to me'. Because suddenly I'm so special you'll give two shits about me. Don't insult me like that. It's bad enough what you've done already, but don't treat me like an idiot."
"I'm not. I'm trying to make you see that we're not against you. Micka-"
"Don't call me that!"
"Ok, ok." Jack wished he could get Ianto out of the way. He was reluctant to risk upsetting Michaela for Ianto's safety as much as her sanity. "Michaela. We don't want to hurt you. We just want to help."
He realised the moment he said it, it had been a mistake.
"Help? Help!" snorted Michaela, all the colour fleeing her face now. Her ire was unable to battle her exhausted body. "Since when have you ever cared about me enough to 'help' me? All you did was fuck me and swan off to him." She glared at Ianto. "Why is it you who gets the team, the friends, the brother, the lover? Every time, it's always you, ALWAYS!"
There was a knock on the door and everyone jumped. Dubhtach whined softly as a familiar, gruff voice called,
"Jack, what's goin' on in there? I heard shouting."
"Archie…" called Jack, unsure what he'd be allowed to say. He knew Michaela was not prepared to use the gun. It did not change the fact that she had a gun and the safety was off.
"Jack?" Archie's voice was more cautious now. He'd sensed something was very wrong.
"Archie… Michaela is awake… and she has a gu-"
"Shut up Jack." Michaela hissed. But Jack knew Archie had got the message.
"I'm coming in." said Archie through the door.
"No you're not! I don't want you anywhere near me." called Michaela viciously.
"I'm coming in Michaela." said Archie firmly and Jack remembered why Archie had been given the job of Torchwood Two's leader. The door clicked open and swung forward slowly. Archie became visibly to Jack long before he became visible to Michaela. He raised his eyebrows in question to Jack who gave a slight nod of reassurance and Archie shut the door. His sharp eyes passed over each of them and he spread his hands to show he had no weapons.
"Michaela…" he sighed, shaking his head. "Look at what we've done to you."
Michaela's face tightened and Jack growled, "Not a great opener, Archie."
"Shut it Jack." said Archie, not taking his eyes off Michaela. "Michaela… we're not goin' to hurt you."
"Says the man who's been lying to me for years."
"What I did was wrong. I did it to help you, but it was still wrong. And I'm sorry for that. But you have to put the gun down."
"No!"
"Michaela, we care about you and we're certainly not going to hurt you." said Archie gently.
"I don't believe you." she snapped. She was on the verge of collapse and all Jack wanted to do was hold her.
"Ok. That's fine, you don't have to believe me. But… just let me say one thing."
"What?"
Archie inclined his head forwards. "Look at Dubhtach."
"What?"
"Look at Dubhtach. Look at her."
Michaela's eyes darted down to look at her dog who stared up at her sadly. Archie continued, "Michaela, you said it yourself, Dubhtach is trained to sense a threat, any threat to you or to others and to protect you from it."
"So?" asked Michaela, but she didn't sound so sure now.
"So, look at her. She's not barking, not growling. She's not even standing to attack. Instead she's watching you. Worrying about you. Because she knows."
Michaela started to tremble. Her knees bent and she was now leaning against the wall, slowly sliding down it. Her eyes were fixed on her dog.
"Dubhtach." she whimpered, sounding betrayed. Dubhtach whined and licked at Michaela's leg, before gazing up at her mistress again.
"Dubhtach knows we're not against you. And even if you don't trust us, you do trust Dubhtach." said Archie calmly.
"She's just a dog." mumbled Michaela dismissively, but without conviction. She was still staring at Dubhtach as she tried to push herself back up the wall into a standing position.
"Yeah. She's a dog, and you're her leader. And that means that she will defend you above all others. That's how you trained her, that's how she behaves. And she knows that we are not against you. She was the one who showed us where you were in the gardens, she has been guarding you all night. And yet she's not once gone on the offensive against us. And that's because Dubhtach knows you and knows we care about you and want to help you."
Michaela let out a whimper and shook her head. Archie stepped forward, saying softly,
"You don't trust us. But you do trust Dubhtach. And Dubhtach trusts us."
Dubhtach gave a soft, agreeable bark and rested a paw on Michaela's knee. Michaela began to cry and she lost the fight inside her. Her legs gave out and she slid down the wall, drawing her knees up to her chest and hugging them. Archie stepped closer, crouching down so he didn't tower over her and he reached out from a respectful distance and said soothingly,
"Give me the gun Michaela."
Michaela shuddered and buried her face in her knees. Dubhtach lifted a paw and gently brushed the gun. There was a soft click of the safety going back on and then, with another nudge from the giant paw the gun slipped from Michaela's hand and clattered to the ground. Archie slowly reached down and picked it up. He passed it behind his back and Jack plucked it out of his fingers and set it on the dresser behind him.
Michaela reached out and wrapped an arm around Dubhtach's neck, pulling the dog close and keeping her face buried in her knees. Soft sniffles escaped her and she was shaking.
Archie looked up at the IV drip Owen had set up and said,
"Ianto, go get your brother. He'll need to put that back in. It's just nutrients, ain't it?"
"Yeah." said Ianto softly, watching Michaela with big sad eyes. Jack nudged him and he shook his head, "I'll, uh, just get him now."
"No…" moaned Michaela, her voice muffled as Ianto hurried out of the room.
Archie spoke in that same soft voice, "It's just nutrients Michaela. It's just to help you feel better."
Michaela shuddered and then she went very still. Her arm dropped from Dubhtach's neck and limply returned to her legs. Dubhtach rose from her haunches and sniffed at Michaela's hair, her spine stiffening with alarm.
"Michaela?" called Archie, frowning. There was no answer. "Michaela, talk to me."
Jack was rushing to her before he realised what he was doing. He reached out to touch her but Dubhtach stepped forward and blocked his way, standing over Michaela, who had stopped moving.
Yup, there is still hope… I swear to God there is!
Night's Darkness
