Content warning: lemon-adjacent foreplay. No actual lemon.


Angina/Symphony


Chapter 53

The Mastermind and the Architect


Aghast and tender, indulged in sin

Embraced by loneliness, legions who grin

I blunder into the realms of slumber

I collide with the obscure

And see the last fraction of light go by.

-The Insight and the Catharsis, Dimmu Borgir


Rei didn't know whether to be excited or nervous. She seemed to be oscillating between extremes of the two emotions at a rate of at least fifty cycles per second.

I'm going to his room tonight, she thought, part elated and part sick to her stomach. No, that's not right. I'm going to his bed.

She was sitting in the bath again, for the second time that day. She would have to get out soon, she knew.

Rei knew that, but the nervous feeling stopped her. Getting out would mean she was going there, and there really wouldn't be any turning back. But turning back was the last thing she wanted to do. She remembered the few brief, largely one-sided conversations her mother had initiated with her on the topic of sex, and the memories made her smile.

'She'd order me not to do it,' Rei whispered aloud to herself. Almost without thinking, she lifted herself out of the water and bent down to pull out the plug.

As she dried herself off, towelling her hair thoroughly until it was dry, Rei thought it to herself over and over again. Each time it gave her a minuscule thrill.

I'm giving my body to him. I'm giving my virginity to Aizen Sousuke.

Her skin tingled. It felt like the tingle was spreading down through muscle, through bone. Rei left the bathroom, naked, and sifted through the pile of neatly folded white clothing Ulquiorra had brought her before Grimmjow had become her caretaker.

She dressed herself in a white silk robe which fell to mid-thigh. Rei wondered briefly whether or not to put anything on underneath, and decided not to. She had no idea what Sousuke's tastes tended towards in that department, and surely if he'd had anything he'd wanted her to wear for him he would have given it to her -

She forced herself to stop that train of thought in its tracks.

Rei tied it at the waist, noticing with a mix of self-consciousness and that strange powerful feeling that it was almost transparent. She couldn't possibly walk through Las Noches as she was. Rei found an oversized white cloak, like the one Szayel wore. It was a little bulkier on her, but she knew she was only putting it on for the sake of decency.

After all, anything she put on now was only going to be taken off by Sousuke later.

Rei's face felt very warm. She opened her bedroom door, only to be greeted with the sight of Ichimaru Gin.

'Ichimaru-sama,' she stumbled, quickly checking that the cloak covered everything. 'What did you come to see me for?'

'Ah, Amane-chan, I was just comin' ta check on ya before I went to bed,' Ichimaru replied. Rei thought his grin looked a little less exuberant than usual, and tried to figure out if it was her imagination.

'Ya doin' okay?' he asked her, and Rei started. It was the first time anyone besides Grimmjow - not counting Sousuke - had expressed concern for her wellbeing during her time in Las Noches.

'Yes,' she said, nodding. 'Why wouldn't I be? Oh.' Rei realized. 'Are you talking about the intruders?'

'If ya like.' Ichimaru didn't pause for long after that cryptic reply. 'Who'd ya send after 'em?'

'Three of the Privaron Espada,' Rei replied. 'I really don't think it's necessary to divert the attention of a full Espada to deal with the likes of them.' She added that last part, in case anyone else was listening. She knew that Ichimaru knew about Sousuke using Kurosaki Ichigo as a research subject, but didn't think Sousuke would be likely to make anyone else in his kingdom privy to that information.

Ichimaru tilted his head. ''Kay then,' he said, seemingly indifferent. 'That's all, I guess.'

With that, he leaned forward, embracing her in a hug.

Rei stiffened, unsure of whether or not to return it. What's going on with him? she thought to herself.

Had he guessed that she, unlike him, wasn't going off quietly to sleep? Did he know she was going to his Aizen-taicho's rooms?

Did he, like Grimmjow, pity her? Rei supposed he would certainly be in a position to. She'd seen what had passed between Ichimaru and Sousuke. She knew Ichimaru had loved a female Shinigami named Matsumoto Rangiku, maybe still loved her, but had given her up to serve Sousuke - in more ways than one.

Rei returned Ichimaru's hug. She could feel his body underneath his white clothing, thin and almost-adolescent.

Ichimaru let go. 'Night, Amane-chan,' he grinned, light-hearted again, and disappeared in a Shunpo.

Rei stood still for a moment, staring at the spot where he'd been. Then she kept walking, shivering a little under her cloak.

I guess he didn't really love her, she thought to herself. He wouldn't have left her and betrayed the other Shinigami if he did.

Then again, maybe Ichimaru had loved Matsumoto. It was possible that he'd just loved Sousuke more.

Rei let out an involuntary sigh. She couldn't help it, and she supposed Ichimaru hadn't been able to either. Sousuke was everything. She didn't understand how anyone was capable of hating him, even the Shinigami he'd betrayed.

He was a master at anything he cared enough to turn his hand to, he was flawless in every possible way, and he could run mental rings around almost anybody.

He was the most beautiful person in existence.

And he was going to make love to her tonight.

Rei smiled dreamily to herself despite the palpitations that thought induced. She couldn't imagine what it would be like, only that it would be the most enduring experience of her life.

After all, he was a master of anything and everything. That had to include lovemaking.

Rei made it to his room unaccosted, and paused at the door. She was almost afraid to open it. Then she told herself to stop being silly. It was Sousuke, and she'd already given herself to him in almost every way possible. All she had to do now was finalise the last, most trivial aspect of the deal.

Rei pushed at the door, discovering that it was unlocked. Of course, she thought. He's expecting me. She smiled to herself at that, and entered.

A ripple of music greeted her. It was his piano, and she followed the sound. As soon as Rei saw him, she struggled with coherent thought.

Sousuke was leaning against the piano with his back to it, one hand trailing across the keys almost lazily. His white outfit was open down to his navel, and Rei sighed out loud. She couldn't quite believe it, that she was going to have the privilege of joining her body with his. He was perfect, and she was -

Appealing, he'd said.

'Renata,' he greeted her. Rei walked towards him, feeling as if she were caught in a mirage. Her eyes wandered over his body, the shadow and light playing over the shapes of the muscles beneath his skin. She wanted to reach out and touch him and make sure he was real.

Surely she couldn't be deserving of what was in front of her. Maybe he was an illusion. Maybe what had passed between them in the bathroom this morning had been an illusion too. Maybe he'd only made her think she was immune to Kyouka Suigetsu, and even now she was lying in bed hallucinating all of this.

Rei didn't believe that theory, not for a second. There was no way her mind was capable of conjuring up Aizen Sousuke as he was now, with that sharp wit of his dancing in his eyes in time with the flickering of the candle flame behind him.

She sat on the edge of the piano itself. 'What are you playing?' she asked.

Sousuke turned to face her, leaning forward so that his face was almost touching hers. 'Something I composed some time ago, during my time in Seireitei,' he answered. 'Does it please you?'

Rei nodded, feeling like a shy teenager again. 'It's lovely,' she said, wondering if he'd realise she was talking about more than the music.

Sousuke seemed to. He smiled, and Rei chose that moment to let the heavy cloak fall away from her shoulders.

Sousuke didn't pause in his playing, but Rei saw the approval in his eyes. 'Lovely indeed,' he said, leaning forward to touch his mouth to hers.

The kiss didn't last nearly as long as Rei would have liked it to. She heard Sousuke's chuckle as he pulled away. He was teasing her, just as he'd teased Ichimaru.

The look in his eyes changed from laughing to serious. His right hand, the hand that wasn't dancing across the piano keys, traced the shape of her face. His fingers travelled down the side of her throat, pressing gently on the pulse of her jugular vein. Rei wondered if he was thinking about her blood again, wanting to taste it. The idea made her shiver, but not in an unpleasant way.

He took in the outline of her shoulder with his hand, moving down her arm. Rei wanted to ask what he was going to do, but somehow felt that it would be irreverent to speak.

Of course it would. She was in the presence of a god.

Rei felt as though she were being transformed, transmuted even. She was lead becoming gold, his hand on her skin through the thin silk making her into something more than what she was.

She felt like a butterfly emerging from a chrysalis, because that was always how his influence on her had been. She belonged to Sousuke because he, and only he, had given her the opportunity to embrace her true self.

Sousuke kissed her again, and Rei could feel it. He wanted her as much as she wanted him. Feeling the warmth of his lips, the slight touch of his tongue against her teeth, that knowledge that she was wanted by a god, awakened it in her.

What it was Rei couldn't exactly say. It was excitement and desire and love and lust all together, but something more as well.

When he stopped the kiss she felt light-headed. It felt natural to lie down, her cheek against the smooth reflective surface of the piano. It was cool against her skin, but did little to calm her pulse.

The music in her ears seemed like a waterfall almost, a cascade of notes. Rei couldn't think clearly, and she didn't want to. She wanted to lose herself in him, and she wanted to do it now.

'Do you really like how I look?' she asked.

Sousuke's smile returned. 'How could I not?' His voice was light, charmed, amused. 'It's very picturesque.' He curled a strand of her hair around a finger. 'The firelight from behind makes you appear almost ethereal. It's a shame I'm not artistically inclined.'

Rei snorted. 'So the fact that I'm almost naked has nothing to do with it?'

'Not entirely.' Both his hands were away from the piano now. Sousuke tangled a hand in her hair, loose around her shoulders, and drew her mouth to his. Rei moaned into him.

His tongue moved inside her open mouth, confident and arrogant and sublime. Then he broke off for the third time, and Rei tried to remember how to breathe. 'Do you want more of me, my queen?' His eyes gleamed wickedly, and she knew it wasn't just the candlelight making them that way.

Rei avoided the question. 'You're being unusually considerate about all this,' she observed as he stood, letting the top half of the mostly undone shihakusho fall away from his body. 'It's not like you.'

Sousuke laughed. 'I'm offended,' he said, walking in a half-circle so that he was positioned to the left of the piano. Rei sighed with relief as he finally lowered himself down onto her, the weight of him making the warmth between her legs grow stronger. 'Surely you can't think I'd be so rude as to rush your first time with me, Renata.'

Rei tried to think of some witty reply, but couldn't. It was just as well, because Sousuke chose then to pick up where he'd left off.

His tongue was just as deftly skilled as his fingers had been, producing that rippling flow of music. He seemed to know exactly how to make her groan and gasp and dig her fingers into his bare back.

His hands were busy too, doing everything Rei had imagined and more. Sousuke's right hand was on the back of her left thigh, raising her leg and positioning it so that it was half-wrapped around his lower back. His left hand -

Rei couldn't stop the noise escaping her lips, into his mouth. Those long fingers of his were exploring the skin beneath the hollow at the base of her throat, dancing a line down between her breasts.

He was teasing her, and that made Rei arch her hips upwards in frustration. She was determined not to beg for him, though. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction, as much as she wanted it hard and fast and now.

'Growing impatient, are we?' he murmured.

Rei was suddenly free to speak, her mouth unoccupied. Sousuke was kissing her throat, teeth no longer just grazing her skin but lightly nipping at it. It felt as if at any moment he would bite her, really bite. He would taste her blood like red wine with that skilled tongue of his, tasting and devouring and feeding on her.

'You know the answer to that question.' Rei was surprised she was capable of speech. 'And I'm not the only one who's impatient.'

He stopped, looking down at her and imprisoning her with his arms and shoulders. Rei couldn't have escaped even if she'd wanted to. The half-smile on his face, the strand of hair which he never swept back hanging down to brush her own parted lips -

He wants me as much as I want him.

Sousuke's left hand was being much less well-behaved now. His beautiful fingers were stroking her breast through the silk. All the while, the lustful mischievous look in his eyes was fixed on Rei's face.

'Hmm. I suppose you're right.' His hand slipped inside the front of her robe, eliciting yet another gasp. Rei heard his husky laughter. His thumb was brushing lightly over her nipple, and she couldn't suppress the long starved moan that came out.

Her hands started roaming of their own accord, down the lovely arch of his neck. Rei's fingers sought out Sousuke's nipples, coaxing them into hardness as he was doing to her. Rei was rewarded with a sound of pleasure, Sousuke pushing his hips harder against her own.

She looked down along their partially clothed bodies, noticing with a slight shiver that her right breast was completely exposed. Sousuke noticed her noticing, and chuckled. Wordlessly, he bent his head down again. He kissed her neck where he'd left off, moving down to trace the shape of her collarbone with the tip of his tongue. Rei didn't bother trying to control her erratic breathing. The heat of his mouth closed around her nipple, and she could feel the motions of his tongue -

'God - Sousuke - oh God -'

Looking down at him doing it added a kind of dark voyeuristic pleasure to the sensation. Rei bucked her hips, feeling unbearably warm and tense between her legs. It ached and burned with wanting, for what she wasn't quite sure.

Even if she didn't know, apparently Sousuke did. His right hand moved away from her chest to rest on her knee, not remaining there for long before sliding down her thigh. Rei felt the intrusion of his fingers down there, in the most private of personal spaces where even she had never quite dared to touch herself -

'You're aroused, my dear,' he murmured. 'I'm pleased. It's extremely gratifying, feeling how much you want me.'

And with that, his fingertips began giving her body exactly what Rei had wanted to give it in the bath that morning, but hadn't known how to. She lost all semblance of control over her reactions then.

She let out a short whimpering cry, which broke off sharply as Sousuke pressed his mouth to her breast again. There was something harder and harsher about his kissing now. Rei could feel his teeth more and more, and felt hot bright pain as those teeth broke skin.

In a twisted way, the pain fed into the pleasure his right hand was giving her. Rei cried out again. In a brief glance down she could see scarlet blood welling up already, feel him hungrily licking it away. In contrast to what his mouth was doing, his fingers were surprisingly gentle, moving in long gradual thrusts in and out of her.

She didn't want gentleness. She wanted -

'Sousuke -'

'Yes, my dear?' His voice was as courteous as ever. 'Is something wrong?' Sousuke laughed at that. 'Because this delightful body of yours begs to differ.'

She wasn't going to beg. She refused to beg.

'God - just do it,' Rei gasped, hearing the need in her voice.

'It? I'm confused as to what you might be referring, Renata.' Sousuke raised his head, her blood bright on his lips. He smiled, hungry and predatory, the smile of a feeding vampire. 'You'll have to be a little more specific than that.'

Even now, with her body pleading for release, Rei's tongue stilled. She couldn't think of how to say it.

Then she stopped thinking, and her body's wants took over.

'F - fuck me.' The words came out in a broken whisper.

Sousuke raised an eyebrow, looking reproving. 'That I most certainly cannot do.' Then the smirk appeared again, his tongue licking the blood away from his lips. 'What I intend to do,' he said, voice dark with lust, 'is to make love to you, my queen, until the only thing you know how to say is my name.' His fingers continued slipping into her, Rei letting out little cries and gasps of mixed pleasure and frustration.

'However,' he continued, 'doing that here will prove uncomfortable for both of us. Shall we move -' Sousuke paused, 'to the bedroom?'

Rei could only nod. Sousuke's hand stopped what it was doing, and he made a noise of amusement at her disappointed sigh. He lifted her effortlessly into his arms, her face pressed against his sculpted god's chest, her legs wrapped firmly around his waist. He carried her away from the flickering candlelight, the cool reflective surface of the piano. When they entered the darkened room, it took Rei's eyes a moment to adjust. Much to her surprise, Sousuke laid her carefully on the wide white bed, almost reverently. Then she saw the wickedness in his eyes, and that filled her with desire and pleasure and excitement and no nervousness at all.

Rei had known all along that his lovemaking, the loss of her virginity, would be anything but gentle. That was, after all, why she loved him.