We sneaked back into Chloe's house again, albeit making a lot of noise from tripping over.
May 13, 2015 11:38 PM
I'm back in Oregon again. Kate showed me something… I hate to write this down. She has cuts on her arms. They were covered. I wanted to cry for her, knowing how much pain she really is going through. I held her. I held her, never letting go for a second. She cried and cried and cried. I never wanted to leave her. I had to when she slept. And now, here I am in Arcadia Bay again. I'm no bounty hunter or anything, but Chloe and I are after the person who did this to her. Not kill her, but sternly talk about it.
Speaking of Chloe, she's on her fifteenth day of being sober! I should make her a badge or something.
The next morning, I woke up earlier than Chloe and I couldn't help but go to the bathroom to just look at myself. I was like a dress-up doll for her, but if I stared long enough, there were things that I liked about it.
Blue hair, tattoo… I'll be Chloe for sure if I wear a beanie and be gay for Rachel.
I grabbed my phone from Chloe's room and walked out again, leaning on the stairs' railing, calling Kate once again to check on her.
"Hello?" Kate answered, sounding happier than ever.
"Hey Kate, I'm just checking up on you." I replied. "How are you feeling today?"
"Better, I spoke to a couple of friends and they want to kill my ex too. I thought it was funny, but… I don't want her to get hurt, even… even after what she did. I finally slept well last night."
"I'm so happy to hear that. And, Chloe wants to hurt her too, you know, hit her with a pizza."
Kate laughed again, "I don't want that to happen either! It looked funny in my head, but don't hurt her."
"We'll try our best." I reassured. "She's going to be up soon, so we'll search for her." Because Victoria was too scared to admit we're semi-friends, I have to fake not knowing where she is.
"It won't be hard. I'm sure she's still around the same area. But, listen, Max. When you get back here, let's go out somewhere, okay?"
"Absolutely, we should do that. It's... It's a date." I hesitated, but I felt happy saying so.
Kate giggled, "It's a date. Good luck. Bye."
"Talk to you later."
"Uh," I heard behind me, "What is this about a date?"
Chloe was standing at her doorway, wearing the same clothes from yesterday and with an unlit cigarette between her teeth. She looked less bad ass and more ridiculous when she didn't have fire close to her face.
"Why are you doing that?"
She shrugged her shoulders, taking it out of her mouth, "No clue. I missed the feeling. Whatever that motherfucker does in that one book, I get it now. But, what is this about a date?"
"I was talking to Kate and she suggested it, so we have a date." I said it so casually, but on the inside, I was freaking the hell out. I then felt a vibration in my pocket:
Victoria: I hope that bitch chokes. Scary, yet so, so Victoria.
Me: On air.
Victoria: Anything. Just choke.
"Good fucking job, Max-Attack! Anyway, mom's already gone and David left, too. We're heading to Two Whales for some grub and then we're going in for the kill—not literally." She specified, holding her hands up defensively.
"You better not really hurt her. Kate said not to!" I said firmly. I could see Chloe roll her eyes, but said, "Fine."
"It's good to hear you decided to see your hometown again. It must be difficult having someone in your life going through a heartbreaking situation. Acknowledge yourself for being so strong, for this friend and the one you mentioned before. Anxiety is a very challenging obstacle; however, it is doable to overcome it. Practice grounding yourself and remind yourself it's okay to leave an overwhelming situation." My therapist left a voice memo for me, after I had left one for her the day before. I really was proud of myself.
Chloe did the same thing too, listening to a voicemail on her phone and nodding as if her therapist was in front of her. I avoided asking anything about her sessions, as she did to me because of client-therapist confidentiality, but despite her saying she hated it, she was listening.
Without saying a word, we got ready for our day and went out in Chloe's car, instead of the truck. I didn't know how to feel about meeting Kate's ex-girlfriend-slash-awful person. I should be nervous, but at the same time, I really was upset about what Kate was going through and what she forgot the whole year. I didn't want to bring it up to Chloe either, since our day started out so good. I crossed my ankles as I stared out of the car's window, watching Arcadia Bay go by.
"I can't wait to eat so many fucking waffles." Chloe snorted at herself.
"Me too, I've been going on without them for too long." I chuckled. We stopped in the same old parking lot of the diner, still the fading blue color and busy as always. In the lot, there was a huge RV with "Free Candy Inside!" written on the side, taking up about five of spots. With the dirty-covered beige color and being so rundown in general, it was too familiar.
"Frank's here?" I pointed at it before Chloe left out.
"Are you fucking kidding me." It was a statement. Chloe hated seeing him more than anyone else. Let's just say Rachel was involved, but she chose Chloe in the end (but she admitted she was only with him for drugs).
"You know what," Chloe kicked her door open, making the hinges squeak, "Don't give a shit. Let's have some grub and then head on out."
"How much you wanna bet he's eating beans?" I asked with a smirk.
"Twenty bucks."
"Deal." We shook on it, connecting together with a loud clap. Right, Chloe knew he would be, but I thought maybe he changed in a year.
We waltzed in there, like we owned the place, and sat at a booth, a couple seats away from the ancient jukebox. On the other side of the room, we saw Frank Bowers with his head down, hat low, and on his plate, was beans, covering every inch and steaming into the air.
"You win, Chloe." I reached into my messenger bag and found two crumpled ten dollar bills and threw it in front of her.
"Thank you very much." She grinned as she grabbed them and shoved them into her pocket. "Speaking of cash, I need to head out to buy some shit."
"Not to hurt Kate's ex, right?"
"... No." She replied. "I need some snacks and some other things."
"Sure."
"Morning, you two!" Joyce was in her blue uniform and half apron, holding a newly brewed pot of coffee. "How did I know you two will be here?"
"Hey mom," Chloe slapped her hand on the table, "Two of those bomb ass waffles and coffee for Max. Oh, make that two, one for me."
"Some things never change." She reached with her free hand and messed with Chloe's hair. "Coming right up."
Joyce walked behind the counter, where truckers and a couple of police officers were sitting at with their food and drinks. Noises like the TVs playing the news, some students from Blackwell messing with each other, and even music from the jukebox playing softly all mixed together into a big mess of noise.
Between eating the stacked high waffles and talking about how the diner was still the same, I was texting Dana that we were back in Arcadia Bay. Dana: Have fun and make sure to see Blackwell again! When I asked Chloe if she wanted to go see the school again, she said, "Hell no, I rather die." Well, Dana would not want to hear that.
"Are you gonna finish that?" Chloe stabbed her fork into the last piece of waffle on my plate.
"Not anymore." I answered as I pushed the plate closer to her.
"Thanks." She ate the piece in one bite. With her mouth full, "Hey, we should do something."
"Great, can you tell me while not spitting syrup at me?" I wiped my cheek.
Chloe took a minute to chew and swallow and then leaned over the table to whisper something to me. The plan was evil, but not different to what I did before. As I looked over Chloe's shoulder, I saw that Frank has somehow not made a dent in his food.
"I got your back," Chloe nodded. "You do it, then when you run, the door's open."
I sighed, tired already, "You owe me." I'm gonna regret this. Sorry therapist, at least I'm going out there.
"Fucking duh, now go!"
I stood up, legs nearly shaking violently, and approached Frank's table. I was afraid of him hitting or wanting to verbally fight me immediately, but I continued with Chloe's ridiculous plan. He was still a sad, dirty drug dealer, even wearing the same jacket, but now he had a large tattoo covering his entire neck. I couldn't tell what it was.
"Rachel?!" That was the same reaction he had to me last time I saw him. I keep forgetting that flannel and plaid was a Rachel thing in Arcadia Bay. "Oh... it's just you. What the fuck do you want?"
"Can't I just have a casual conversation with you?" I shrugged my shoulders, already uncomfortable.
"Wow, blue hair and that fucking outfit? You want to be them so badly, but news flash girly, you're trying too hard."
Wowsers, is he serious? They're my moms, you asshole.
"Whatever, just came here to do one thing." I grabbed his plate, letting all the contents spill onto the tiled-ground and then dropping the plate with a clatter. "Fuck you."
"Those were mine, you bitch!" He stood up and was ready to grab me.
I ran out of the diner, Chloe was already in the exit, and ran to her car, immediately jumping in and driving out of the parking lot.
"Holy shit, Max!" Chloe was hopping in her seat as she drove. "That was hella insane! Rachel will lose her shit once she hears this!"
"I can't believe I did that! What magical powers do you have that possessed me to do that?!"
"I don't have any! You're just hella reckless! You're becoming more like me every damn day, high fucking five!"
No hesitation, I slapped my palm against hers.
Our day was almost like I never did that to Frank. We went to a gas station for Chloe's car, but we also went inside to get some snacks and candy to pass some time before hitting up the pizza place. What I noticed was that Chloe bought two things: two Ring pops. One was pink-and-blue and one was red-and-orange. I didn't ask what they were for, assuming she would just eat them. She bought another box of cigarettes too, but no lighter or even anything to light them at all.
"Come on, you don't even have to light it." Chloe was trying to hand me a Marlboro cigarette.
I stared at the nicotine stick in her hand. I didn't have any reason to put it in my mouth; I didn't have a reason to have it anywhere near me! I would just be another Chloe, which I think was what she wanted.
"Do you want to light yours?"
"Well yeah, I used to do it all the time. The feeling doesn't go away, Max. Getting clean is… not easy."
I huffed, and reluctantly grabbed it, "Fine." I stuck it between my teeth, moving it around with my tongue. It sort of felt like a gross straw, but I immediately gave it back to her. Chloe shrugged as she put the one I just gave into hers, making her look like she had two fangs.
"Can you put all of them in your mouth?" I grabbed the whole box from her lap. "I'll send the pic to Rachel."
Again, no rejection or hesitation. She lined up all the cigarettes in her mouth and then posed for the shot, like it was an artsy and angst-y photo. But, we were sitting in Chloe's living room in the middle of the day. Plus, they weren't even lit. But, I took the picture anyway and Chloe sputtered as she put them out onto the couch and floor.
"Thanks, I look hella stupid." She said. I watched her send the picture to Rachel regardless.
I laughed, agreeing with her, "You're just reminding Rachel who she's in love with, that's all."
"Uh, yeah, I'm awesome." Chloe tossed her phone to the side, falling in between the cushions. "But, what's the big plan with the ex?"
"Before that," I reached into my bag, taking out a crappy post-it note with "15 Days!" written on it. "I forgot to give this to you! Congrats on being sober for fifteen days!"
She smiled and chuckled, amused, and stuck it to her jacket, "Thanks, now, can we please talk about the other thing?" She's impatient, but she's grateful. I can see it in her eyes!
"Right, since she's delivering pizzas, I say call the place before they close to force her into overtime." That sounded less lame in my head.
"That's so fucked, I love it." Chloe dug in the cushions to find her phone again. "Catch her when she least expects it! I didn't feel like driving anymore to that christian school or that pizza shop—I have a hella headache right now… not today anyway. She can come to us."
"Exactly," I snapped my fingers, "So, we'll wait right now and then when the time's right, we'll call the place and get her over here."
That was what we did. We waited and waited, watching TV and getting snacks from time to time. Turns out, both Joyce and David had to work overnight, due to Joyce needing more money and David watching out for more students breaking in. Chloe and I were simply waiting, calling up Dana and Kate and even Juliet (hell, I called Victoria and Warren too), to pass it faster. Kate expressed how she couldn't sleep again, which was fine with me. I had all-night to text her.
"It's time!" Chloe grabbed her phone and then called the pizza place's number, practically stabbing her thumb into her phone screen.
"Yo, can I get a, uh... large half pepperoni-half cheese pizza and, uh, two-liters of Coke?" Chloe asked. The sun was setting outside; place closes earlier than any other place. "Thanks, my address is—"
My phone started to ring. I checked and it was Kate again.
"Hey, what's up?" I asked first.
"Nothing, I just wanted to hear your voice again." She sounded tired this time.
"Your voice is nicer than mine." I complimented. "We found the place and calling it right now, so our plan is in motion."
"Again, please don't hurt her."
"We won't. Is that all you needed from me? To hear me talk?"
"That's it. And that I've been thinking about you. I could never tell my friends this. I'll never hear the end of it."
"Well, I'm flattered to be the only one to hear that." I chuckled. I could feel Chloe's eyes boring into the back of my skull.
Kate did a tired giggle.
"How are you feeling? Really?" I asked seriously. I hope she wasn't pretending to be happy. I mean, she didn't have to with me.
"I'm certainly smiling more today than the last few days."
"Good, I need you to smile every day."
"I will, Max. Good luck on your mission."
"Thanks."
I ended the call and then turned around again to face Chloe, who was looking at me with a smirk. "Just how gay are you?"
I didn't answer, only with a smirk. We both waited for the pizza. Since the place was miles off towards the center of Oregon, we were waiting a while. I even took a nap in that time and she still hasn't shown up yet. I'll set up a phone right now. I searched around the room. I need to record this, both video and microphone. Maybe Victoria could use this.
"Chloe," I called her, standing from the couch, "can I see your phone? We should use it to record this. We might need it."
"Oh, right, that makes sense." She took her phone out from her pocket and handed it to me. "Talking about it wouldn't do shit, I guess?"
I nodded, hiding her phone in the room, in a plant actually and, with the help of Chloe's height, she made sure it was aimed correctly.
It was nighttime and the door finally had a few couple knocks. Chloe practically ran to the door and opened it.
To be honest, we did have the same features. Brown hair, blue eyes, same height... but we were completely different. She was more feminine than me. She didn't have short hair anymore like Kate described, but a pony tail pulled through the back of her work hat.
"Uh... pizza and soda?" She asked with a tired and awkward smile.
"Can I ask you one question?" I started the forced interaction.
"Of course?"
"Did you know Kate Marsh?"
It was dead silent. There was fear in her eyes as she stared at the both of us. She threw the pizza at us and dropped the coke on the ground, running to the car. Chloe was faster as she ran after her and grabbed her, lifting her off the ground as she thrashed and kicked. She dragged her into her house, closing the door with her foot. What a waste of food and drinks. It's all on the damn ground!
Chloe stuck her onto the dining room chair, turning on the light like it was an interrogation.
"Please don't hurt me, I-I'll tell you anything and everything about Kate! I knew her in ninth grade and we always shared a dorm, I'll say anything!"
"You're such a pussy..." Chloe rolled her eyes.
"Don't be scared. We just have a few questions. Or, a lot of questions."
"Shoot! I mean—please don't shoot. Ask anything."
I had to get the adrenaline out first. Like an interrogation, Chloe was watching her with a death glare while I paced behind her. "First... why? why did you do that to Kate?"
She calmed down. Interlocking her fingers on the table and the staring down at them. "I... I didn't know either."
"What do you mean?"
"Like, I didn't understand that I was doing that to her too. I forced her to do things... I forced acts onto her and when it was over, even when she was clearly hurting, I tried to tell her that everything was okay. What I did was okay. And... it worked! Kate was in love with me. I was in love with her. But, as I grew more, I realized I hurt her. I tried to ignore it at first, but it was eventually too much. I had to admit that I did that to Kate. But, I know there's no excuse..."
"You hurt Kate. The moment you did, you knew what you were doing."
"I don't get it either!" She was on the verge of tears. "I tried to figure it out, but nothing! I loved her! I didn't want to lose her!"
"Was your first time, the one she told me, the truth?!"
"Yes! Our first was awkward and bad and didn't work out, but I... wanted more. I needed more. I needed her!"
"So you lied!"
"Fuck you!" Chloe took matters into her own hands and slammed her fist into the pizza girl's cheek. "Fuck! You!"
"Please... I just want to talk to her."
"Shut up." Chloe spat at her.
