We know these chapters are taking forever, lovelies, and we are very truly sorry for that. Our lives have been crazy and we don't always have time to write and focus on such difficult subjects like the story line of this universe. But know that we almost ALWAYS have this universe on our minds, whether we are physically able to sit down and write about it or not.

We give a warning for this chapter: We got a little creative with the sexual innuendos and Shelby and Cassie this time around so if you don't like that then be cautious reading.

We also dove into a pretty serious religious conversation later on in the chapter.

However, if you've been following our story THUS far, you know that those two things are not abnormal.

We love and appreciate every single one of you. Thank you for continuing to share our gorgeous little world with us!

Love always, keeperofwords and Hayley

Chapter 52: Love, Religion, and Living with Dee Corcoran

Dee was turned around, facing the kitchen counter as she finished taking a drink out of her glass. Since Cass only saw the back of her, the blonde didn't stop to think that it could be Dee. Cass just assumed it was Shelby when she wrapped her arms around the woman from behind and kissed her cheek.

"Hey sweetheart." She whispered, exhausted and not pulling her thoughts together quickly enough.

Dee scoffed and smirked. "Well hello to you too, sweet cheeks." She responded, her voice one of the only differences between she and Shelby. Shelby's voice was a bit higher in register.

Cass dropped her arms and jumped back. "Damn it, Dee!" She laughed. "Warn a girl."

"Hey," Dee put her hands up in the official "I'm innocent" gesture. "If you can't tell the difference between me and your wife, I'm not the problematic one here..."

"I can't from behind when I'm this tired..." Cass admitted. "…Shelby have any coffee going? Or tea?" Her tone was hopeful as she turned to groggily search the kitchen. It'd been such a long day and she needed some caffeine to power her through.

"Coffee, at this time of night?" Dee raised her eyebrow with an air of disapproval. "I threw that out. I just washed out the coffee pot."

Cassandra July groaned. God help her, she had to stop herself from screaming like she did at her students when they pissed her off. Dee was, however, Shelby's beloved Aunt—not some snotty nosed, pimply faced undergraduate student. Dee did not believe in caffeine after eight o'clock at night. Some of Dee's quirks were funny. Others drove Cass fuckin crazy. Cass did notice that Dee had the tea kettle on.

Maybe I can at least get some tea, Cass thought. I've got to go over some things while my brain is still working... Cass was pleased that Dee was already pouring hot water into two mugs. One of those mugs was the one her dear little star had made her at Christmas time. Cass frowned when Dee did not reach into the cabinet to get the tea from Shelby and Cassie's everlasting tea stash. Instead, Dee reached into a small bag and pulled out a pair of two tea bags.

Gods, what kind is it this time, Cass cringed. Guava juice?

"Try it, Cass," Dee turned around and produced a mug. "It's bug dung tea. Quite a delicacy. It would cost you around a thousand dollars in some parts."

Cass growled internally. Dee was so anal about some things and had these funny ideas. Ideas like no caffeine after eight o'clock at night and drinking bug dung tea.

I wonder if I have one of those energy drink cans in the back of the pantry, Cass thought to herself. Her musing was interrupted by Dee, who had turned off the stove and was pulling off the tea kettle.

"So when did you guys get Rachel back?" She asked, sitting down as Cass moved to do the same, forgetting her energy drink idea. Dee would likely just pitch a fit about it if she saw it anyways. "I got a lot of information without really getting any information."

"We were her Christmas present. She came back a little before her birthday but we didn't know she was here until-"

"Cassie, kiss me, I'm in a mood," Cass was interrupted by her wife who came storming into the kitchen. The blond swerved around in her chair to see Shelby looking tired and frazzled. "I just want to sleep," she admitted. She sat down on Cassie's lap and Cass gave her a soft kiss.

"Tea?" Dee pushed it forward in offering.

A bit of concern, Shelby looked to Cass in curiosity. She knew how out there Dee could be. Cass widened her eyes and pressed her lips together and Shelby sighed softy. "No thanks Aunt Dee."

"You two are so cute," Dee remarked, her voice soft and light. "You really should drink this tea, Cass." She added, noticing that Cassie hadn't touched hers at all. "It's supposed to enhance sexual performance. It's actually quite good, once you can get past the fact that it's made from bugs that ate tea leaves."

Cass rolled her eyes, and, although knowing Shelby would throttle her for joking about sex with her beloved aunt who was so like a mother to her, she just could not help herself. She had to comment back.

"Like the number of orgasms, or the length of each one?" Cass asked bluntly, brazenly reaching for a cup and take a big swig.

Shelby felt herself blush and any thought about kissing her wife left, with her aunt sitting across from them.

Dee, for her part, choked back a laugh. "I'm not sure, to be honest. Always the charmer you are, by the way, Cass."

Cass wasn't listening, she was spitting the tea back out into the mug. "That's fucking disgusting." She sputtered. "Fuck enhancing my sexual performance I'm a firecracker in bed, isn't that right, Shelbs?"

"Shut up, Cass." Shelby sighed, unable to help the corners of her lips from turning up in a very small smile.

Cass smiled and tickled Shelby's sides lightly. "Wow, you really are in a mood, huh?"

Shelby managed to crack a bigger smile. "Maybe extra-long orgasms wouldn't be so terrible after all," she decided to play along. If you can't beat them, join them.

"Your wish is my command, but we aren't doing it with help from that bug shit tea, okay?"

"Well some of us need alllllll the help we can get," Dee told Cass and Shelby whilst sipping on the tea. "I do admit, it is an acquired taste. I am still drinking it even after Simone and I parted in Amsterdam. Though my orgasms now are all in my own hands, if you know what I mean."

"I soooo don't want to hear about this," Shelby all but whined, climbing off Cassie's lap and opening the fridge. "I had forgotten how the two of you talk when you are together." Shelby pulled out the wine bottle they had opened at dinner and poured herself a glass.

"Oooooh, wine for me too, please?" Cass practically begged. "Help me get this taste out of my mouth..." Shelby handed her wife a glass as well and downed her own.

"Where is everyone?" Cass asked after a beat.

"Rachel wanted to stay with Natalie, Holly, and April tonight." Shelby let her know.

Cass nodded in approval, continuing to sip her wine. "Is everything done then?"

"Yeah, everything's over there. They just have to unpack."

Another few moments went by as the three women stretched and took the silence to gather their thoughts.

"So, taking care of yourself alone is not something you tend to do for long," Cass said after the trio had moved to the couch in front of the fire to talk and catch up. "Lima does not have any lesbian bars, as you know, but I do know someone…a new teacher at the high school."

"Oh, no," Shelby interjected, turning Cassie's face and cupping it with her left hand so that she would listen carefully. "No more blind dates for my aunt. That last one you set her on was with a person no older than our college students. My Aunt is not one of those cougars."

"I'm not?" Dee cocked her head to the side in wonder. "Well it's a good thing you told me, Shelbs, or my life could have been super awkward."

Shelby buried her face and Cassie laughed, throwing her head back and downing some more wine. "It's good to have you back, Dee." she decided.

"It's good to be back, Cass." Dee agreed. "I haven't seen the two of you in ages. Now. Catch me up, for the love of god I'm dying over here. I've missed too much. When did April and Holly decide to get serious? Why do you have custody of Rachel? Why does this place look like a complete train wreck? Shelby loathes mess, I haven't been gone for THAT long..." she hit them with questions she was dying to know answers to.

"I swear, the way she asks one question after the other reminds me of another little Corcoran," Cass sat back, amused, watching her wife cock her head to the side trying to decide what to address first. "Hurry it up with the explanations Shelbs. The sooner you answer the sooner we can send Dee to bed and I can seduce you."

"Oh dear lord, you two," Shelby pointed first at her wife and then her aunt. "I swear sometimes you both say things just to try to fluster me." Her remark earned a twinkle in Dee's hazel eyes. Cassie's response was to lean over and give her a long kiss that made her moan.

"Cassandra July, get your tongue out of her mouth so I can hear about Rachel and why she is living here," Dee reached over and smacked the back of the blonde's back to get her attention. "You can have sex on the couch when I am in the guest bed touching myself."

"Oh dear gods, maybe I need to go spend the night with April too," Shelby mumbled, moving to stand up.

"Dee, we'd best behave," Cass giggled, pulling Shelby to sit on her lap. "Shelby, you behave too. You know April and Holly are christening their new bed. Dee and I will be good. We both just feed off each other."

"I am sorry Shelley," Dee spoke apologetically. "I love you, sweetheart, and promise to behave. You are as red as those embers in the fire. Sit back in your wife's arms and tell me all about Rachel, my goodness, I have missed a lot…" Dee looked over at her niece and her niece's partner. "Good thing I plan to stick around so I can get a more detailed version and not just the cliff notes."

"We love having you here," Cass answered quickly. Dee may get on her last nerve sometimes because they were so much alike. But it made for a lot of fun, also. Both were a terrible twosome when it came to teasing Shelby. Shelby both loved and hated it.

"Stay longer than the musical," Shelby's voice had a hopeful plea to it.

"Of course, I have your little one to get to know and stories of your childhood to embarrass you with," Dee told her niece with her characteristic laugh that filled the room. "And I have missed our talks, Shelly."

"I have too, Aunt Dee," Shelby agreed. "I am so happy that you're here. I have missed you so much." Shelby got up from the couch and moved to the arm chair and embraced her. She lost herself in the sensation of her aunt's arms for a few moments. Shelby sighed, smelling her aunt's familiar perfume. It was the smell of unconditional love and family. She felt a kiss to the top of her head and for a moment felt as if she were Rachel's age again. Dee was more of a mother than her biological mother ever was. After a long moment, Shelby stood up once more. Cassie's open arms welcomed her back. This was family. Her family, and it felt wonderful.

Dee had listened to the whole story about Rachel coming to the mansion on the snowy night. She had listened about Christmas and then New Years. Though Cass and Shelby had not gone into much detail, the couple had told her the three were going through family therapy. That pleased Dee Corcoran greatly. Shelby's poor baby girl had been through so much. Both Shelby and Cassandra did not have relationships with their parents. Dee did not know Cassie's history well, but the look in Cass's eyes as Shelby told her story spoke volumes. The whole family needed therapy, time, and healing. They also needed a new beginning and it looked like they were getting it.

Dee put her wine glass down and got up from her arm chair. She moved to sit on the couch right beside her niece. She patted Shelby's leg and let her hand rest of Shelby's knee. Green Eyes met each other and the two Corcoran's spoke without speaking. Both felt the love given to the other and the affirmation of their familial bond. Dee winked and Shelby returned it with a shy subtle smile.

"To new beginnings," Dee made a toast and lifted her wine glass with heartfelt sentiment.

"To new beginnings," Shelby and Cassandra echoed.

A moment of silence followed, the only sound being the crackling in the fireplace.

. . .

The next morning, Dee sat in the butterfly pose in the middle of Cassie's studio. Cass opened her studio door, ready to run through a few dance scenes before her students came in, but was greeted with the scene of Shelby's aunt in her way.

Cass loved Dee, she really did. But she needed her studio.

"Dee? I need my studio like ASAP." Cass let her know. Dee responded with silence—by not responding at all.

Cass let out a sigh. She was never one for patience. "Earth to Dee?" She pounded her dance cane on the floor a few times.

Calmly, Dee opened her eyes. "You're interrupting my meditation center."

"I'm sorry. Use the studio downstairs, this one is mine and I need it for my class." Cass explained. "I don't have much time before the musical, we're doing rehearsals all day everyday starting this morning, and-"

"Give me a few more minutes to finish my cycle?" Dee said it like a statement more than a question. "I'm almost done."

With a sigh, Cass left the studio. She did not like this. She was in charge of her own studio. She was sore from the day before, tired, and cranky. And now Dee had her studio. The studio was her domain. This would not do at all. The blonde bit back a curse, seeing Rachel at the top of the stairs about to come down to start the day. Shelby would relegate her to the couch if tender ears started to mimic her sometimes colorful vocabulary. So for the moment, Cass decided it was best to storm into the kitchen and complain to her wife who was currently cooking breakfast.

"Shelby," Cass complained in a crisp whisper, "She is in my studio. She is in my damn studio." When Shelby did not say anything, Cass continued, "She's doing that weird spiritual shit and mediation. Are you sure she's not a Buddhist? You have got to talk to her. I don't need this to start my day…I'm stressed enough as it is right now…"

"Calm down," Shelby gave Cass a pointed look. The blonde always got so damn possessive over her studio. "Dee isn't going to be there all day every day. I'll talk to her about it."

"We have a studio downstairs." Cass pointed out for a second time this morning.

"So use it," Shelby rolled her eyes.

Cass raised an eyebrow. "Are you fucking kidding me? I have a musical to direct, students will be here in less than an hour..." she didn't bother keeping her mouth clean, she needed her space. All of her blocking was in HER studio, and Shelby knew this very well.

This was turning out to be a tense morning, and way more dramatic than it needed to be. As much as Cass and Dee loved each other, they also loved to hate each other more than anything else. They were too similar, but also too different and they clashed because of it.

"You could join her," Shelby told her wife, her back turned as she cracked some eggs for Rachel, scrambling them. Shelby knew full and well that Cass had the flexibility to do the most complex of yoga positions, she just found it a waste of time. The closest thing Cass did that even resembled a state of meditation was afterglow after a series of orgasms. Because damn, Cassie had a strong sense of sexuality and she was proud of her healthy sex life—of her personal physical connection with Shelby.

"You could share the room. You and I have done so often enough." Shelby pointed out, pulling herself from her thoughts.

The sound of bare feet running down the stairs and into the dance studio came from outside of the kitchen. Both women heard the studio door open and then close immediately afterwards.

"Auntie Dee, Auntie Dee," Cass heard an excited squeal, "Could you show me how you do that?"

"Shelby." Cass had lost all patience and continued her rant after Rachel closed the studio door once more. "I have over 30 students coming in and I am not sharing the fucking studio. I don't care what you do, just get her out so I can direct this damn musical and we can be done with it."

Shelby double blinked at her wife. Where was all of this coming from? "What bit you in the ass this morning?" She asked. "I thought you were happy to see her?" Cass was being weird. Was it just because of stress? Directing the whole musical was a lot to take in after the past couple of months…Shelby was trying to help her but once she had healed Cassie already had a developed system worked out that she didn't have the time to explain to Shelby. Cass was basically directing and teaching choreography on her own. Shelby was left to work with the orchestra and students on singing and performing the music itself.

"I am happy to see Dee," Cass amended, taking a drink of coffee before finishing making a bottle of lemon water to keep in her studio. "Just not in my studio. I have to direct this entire musical Shelby, I can't work with limited space! I have to be able to command the room!"

Shelby abruptly turned off the stove and spun around on the heels of her bare feet. The brunette reached her right hand into the blonde's yoga pants and into her panties to grip her right buttock. With her left hand, Shelby quickly moved up the blonde's tank top pushing up her wife's sports bra up so she could caress the nipple. Shelby flicked her finger on the tip while caressing her wife's ass.

"You always have my full attention," Shelby purred, leaning into Cassie's neck and nuzzling it. She peppered it with soft kisses and added, "You definitely do know how to take command of a room. You are all fire and softness." Shelby's words matched her seductive touches. "I bet I can think of a lot of things we can do for the next thirty minutes until the students come. All of them involve my hands all over you."

This was the best way that Shelby could come up with to distract Cassie and not start a fight in the household. Besides, for some reason her libido was running high today and she knew Cassie would just adore this…she needed something to help her de-stress recently.

Cassandra July's blood was still running hot from the infringement on her studio and its private domain. Now however, her blood was quickly rushing to other very specific parts of her body. Anger had been replaced with a rush of sensual lust.

"Jesus, Shelby, what do you do to me..." Cass rolled her eyes at what she knew her wife was doing-trying to keep the peace by completely distracting her—Cass was no fool. But this morning, she decided that she would go with it. How often was it that Shelby made moves like this, not in their bedroom? "Alright, this morning, and this morning only," Cass agreed, already too enthralled by Shelby's caresses to change her mind. "But if she's in there tomorrow morning..."

"She won't be, I'll talk to her..." Shelby whispered. "Don't start unnecessary fights, Cassie, please, just go with the flow okay?" she nibbled Cassie's ear.

Cass let out a huff of breath and she wasn't sure if it was from exasperation or lust. "That's a big request coming from you," she felt it necessary to point out. "You never go with the flow."

"Therapy is teaching me a lot of things," Shelby defended as she kissed Cassie's neck. Cass took Shelby's arm lightly and pulled it down so that she was no longer caressing Cassie's breast.

"Like how to seduce your wife in order to change topics?" Cass asked, her voice a soft whisper.

"I deny nothing," Shelby purred, demanding her wife's attention. Shelby roughly grabbed her wife's hands and pushed them into her panties. "Wasn't my homework to do things to be good for myself? As you see, I am not having any trouble going with the flow this morning." Shelby placed Cassie's fingers where she wanted them and continued, "Our child and my aunt are occupied in "Your Studio" and I want you to take me here and right now, damn you. You can take command right here and right now."

This was an odd side of Shelby that Cassie had not seen in a long time. But she didn't mind it one bit.

She tilted her head to the side in wonder.

"Who are you, and what have you done with Shelby Corcoran?" she wondered, pushing Shelby slowly until she was backed up against the counter.

Shelby shrugged. "You're in command, July, why don't you tell me?"

Cassie laughed and so did Shelby as she lulled her head back and for once, let go of control.

. . .

"Alright. Take five," Cassie breathed out as Shelby slumped in exhaustion. Cassandra the director gave her wife a wink and slipped off into one of the bathrooms to freshen up before the students showed up. Shelby did the same in another bathroom and then thoroughly cleaned the kitchen counter. That was the most unprofessional thing that she and Cassandra had done in a long time. It was spontaneous and in broad daylight and it was...odd and out of character to say the least. But neither one of regretted doing so.

If nothing else, that was incredible AND it got Cassie's mind off of her studio. She's been killing herself with work and stress directing this damn musical recently... Shelby mused to herself. Cassie needed this, you know she did. Sex and romance and love with me...that's always been how Cassie has coped with her life when it got hard. It's how we connect. She needs to know that she's still in charge, still in control right now when all of these different obstacles keep getting thrown her way...

. . .

Dee Corcoran looked over at her young great niece and smiled as they entered the front door of the mansion. She and Rachel had grabbed their coats and made a hasty exit when the sounds of moaning erupted in the kitchen. Luckily, the two had just gone next door and had some wonderful breakfast quiche. Holly was a great cook. Holly and April had not been surprised at their entrance into the Victorian. April had made some comment about Shelby forgetting to close the blinds.

Dee was bringing two plates of it over now because she knew very well that Shelly and Cassie had not been eating anything but each other. Dee knew she needed to apologize to Cassie, too. She really should have asked before just walking into the studio and starting her morning routine.

And she knew that Cassie and Shelby needed this special moment together, this morning. They'd been through too much recently. She allowed them this moment.

I mean, I stole her studio, it's the least I could do...what else was she going to do, really? Without dancing and sex Cassie July is…well she isn't Cassie July. Dee chuckled to herself. She knew that the two were done with their morning love making by now-students were going to show up for rehearsal soon.

She walked into the mansion with Rachel in tow and set the women's breakfast down on the counter as they were making their way back into the kitchen. Cass raised an eyebrow.

"What's this?" she wondered.

"Breakfast!" Dee declared and scrunched her nose. "Sorry I stole your studio. I won't do it again..."

"Is this Holly's quiche?!" Shelby interrupted, grabbing a fork out of the drawer and digging in. "Oh my godddddd...why doesn't she cook for us more often?" she joked.

"Cuz she's too busy helping us do everything else," Cass was only half teasing. She and Shelby knew that Holly and April helped them almost too often. They planned to pay them back with something huge-they just had to come up with a brilliant idea for it first…

. . .

With her belly full and her libido humming, Cass began her day. Dee, for the most part, stayed out of the way. Cassie's mood was tempered by amusement by the students ogling Dee. The oldest of the Corcoran's was wearing skinny jeans and a sweater that accentuated her figure. Boys kept staring at her and Dee made sure to bend over a lot. The lesbian was playing them and it was so blatantly obvious.

It was curious that Dee looked so much like Shelby and literally every person attracted to females in the room seemed to be propelling towards Dee, though. It made Shelby and Cassie wonder what the students thought about Shelby when she had her back turned or was bending down…

Meanwhile Dee helped Rachel with her schoolwork while the two Broadway stars fine-tuned the minute details of their musical. Cass noticed Shelby had her sexy on today also. The blonde was totally intrigued at how Shelby kept brushing up against her. If the morning and incidental touching was foreshadowing, Cass could not wait to go to bed tonight. Dee had even volunteered to go to the printers to take the final program brochure to print and was now cooking with Rachel and Natalie while April joined the afternoon rehearsal. The whole thing was totally domestic.

Shelby was finding the situation with Dee and the students hilarious. None of their students knew much about their personal lives, much less their families, (save for Mariana and Brandon). The freshman boys especially were looking at her aunt much like Brandon often looked at Cass.

Why do freshman students not have the ability to know that the object of attraction is gay? Shelby mused, looking at her watch out of hunger and curiosity. The smell of lasagna was filling the mansion. Her aunt's cooking was always so incredible.

Rachel kicked her legs back and forth, looking over her shoulder at the Bible that was laying open on the table as they got ready to eat. She could not believe that Auntie April and Auntie Holly let Natalie keep it…much less read it. They must have, though, or she would not have brought it over to read while they waited for Aunt Holly to get back from work and for Auntie April to finish dancing "Cats" with mommy and mama. The two girls were in the kitchen with Dee. Auntie Dee was on the phone while she was leaning over the stove. She was talking in a foreign language that sounded beautiful. Natty said it was French. Auntie Dee did not seem to care that Natalie had a Bible. It was all so strange to Rachel.

Rachel had been very very careful to not even talk about church things. She believed that there was a heaven and a hell still. She thought mama did too, because she heard her tell mommy that she wanted the reverend to go straight to hell.

In bed during their sleep-over the night before, Natalie had told Rachel that she had been thinking more about her mother lately. She'd explained that the more time she spent with Holly and April, the more she thought of her mother who had died. She told Rachel a secret as they huddled under the covers: that she thought her mother watched over her from heaven and she would see her again one day. Natalie had also whispered that Auntie April reminded her a lot of her tummy mother.

It seemed to Rachel that Natalie must still be thinking about her mother because she still had her Bible and was looking at religious things. Holly and April were definitely different than Reverend Andrews. He would have burned anything he did not like in the fireplace. Rachel wondered what her mommy would think about having a Bible in their mansion. She did not dare bring up the fact that Easter was coming up soon, but she was hoping now that she was away from the Reverend she could wear a pretty dress and have an Easter Basket. She did not think she should bring it up, though.

She turned her head when she heard the studio door shut for dinner break. That meant her mommies would be coming into the kitchen for dinner and would mommy get mad about the Bible being on the table?

. . .

"Back, woman," Cass removed Shelby's arms from around her neck and stepped away from her wife. Today, Shelby was experiencing a level of sexual libido that Cass had not seen since their wedding anniversary…or perhaps since that stint a while back when Shelby had hurt herself. Cass had no doubt that if they were alone with no responsibilities, the pair would have spent the entire day in bed. But with "Cats" in the homestretch and a home full of people and students, that was not to be.

"We will conserve water," Shelby replied, playfully bantering back even as she stepped away for Cass to pass by her.

"You know if you go take a shower with me, we both will miss Dee's lasagna," Cass said, wagging a finger at her. "Later," Cass whispered, winking at her wife and running up the stairs.

Shelby laughed to herself and took a deep breath. The whole house smelled heavenly. She could hear talking in the kitchen and moved to join them. Dinner smelled done, so the least she could do was to set the table. The singer crossed the threshold of the kitchen to the sounds of the laughter of Dee, Holly and April. At the table sat her daughter and Natalie, both looking down at an open Bible. Shelby's green eyes did a double take and widened.

Religion has caused this little girl so much pain, yet she still believes in what The Reverend has taught her? Shelby questioned. She locked eyes with Holly from across the room, as if to silently ask, You let her have that?

Holly gave a nod. "She believes it and wants it, we aren't going to take it away from her."

Natalie, sensing they were talking about her, looked up and decided to speak for herself. "I believe in what the Bible tells me, and I have faith. I don't believe in what The Reverend said. But what he said wasn't all true. What the Bible says is all true."

"Even the part where is says me, Shelby, Dee, Holly, and April are all going to hell?" Cassandra asked her question before she could stop herself as she made her way back into the kitchen and realized that she was about to get into a religious debate about sexuality with a little girl.

"Cass!" Shelby scolded her.

Cass backed off.

"I believe that God is a higher power and that he watches over us. His gave his son to die for our sins. His love is unconditional. Regardless of our sins." Natalie said to Cassie, raising her chin with a confidence that the adults had never seen before. "Besides, if you don't believe, then what are you going to celebrate on Easter?" she was genuinely curious about this.

Taken aback, Cass thought about this to herself. Atheists celebrate Easter and Christmas still…I'm not an atheist though, am I? Shit, I don't know what I am…Tired, is what I am…

Rachel looked at Natalie, then up at the adults in the room, and back at Natalie.

She was wondering about Easter, too. But she was more interested in whether or not Natalie thought her mothers were going to hell.

"Answer Mama's question, Natty," Rachel pleaded with liquid brown eyes. Rachel worried Natalie was going to say something that the Reverend would say. If she did, Rachel's heart would break in two.

Rachel sniffed, waiting stiffly in her seat at the table to hear what Natalie would say. She realized this was an important moment. What her older sister said, could determine whether they all could really be a family. Did Natalie even want to be with them if she thought they were all sinners and going to hell?

Natalie felt nervous now. Everyone was staring at her, waiting for an answer. She regretted opening her mouth. She bit her lip and pulled her sleeve up to her mouth, anxiously.

"Like I said, God's love is unconditional," her voice was soft. "As long as Shelby and Cassie believe in him and that Jesus died for us, their sins will be forgiven. They'll go to heaven, and the others will too, if they believe."

Rachel looked up at Shelby and Cassie with wide eyes. "Is that true, Mommy?" she asked of Shelby.

The brunette bit her bottom lip. It was rare that she and Cass discussed religion and she didn't have an answer for Rachel for she really didn't know herself.

"Ummm..." she was at a complete loss for words. Frantically, Shelby's eyes darted towards Holly, April, Cassie or Dee for help. How was she supposed to respond? She wasn't sure she even believed...

"Rachel...sweetie..." Cass crouched down to Rach's level and took a deep breath, trying to give herself time to think about what to say without damaging this girl or confusing her more than she already was. "Look, honey. I'm not sure if I believe in what Natalie is saying and neither, really, is Shelby...we didn't grow up trusting in it and we don't know very much about it...we've never actually discussed it, not really. I can't tell you what's going to happen when we die. Maybe that's what Natalie believes. If you believe it too, we aren't going to stop you from thinking that way..." she bit her lip, wondering if she was actually saying what she was trying to say. She felt like she was doing a terrible job. She stood up. "Can you...can we maybe talk about this after mommy and I have had more time to talk about it?" now she just felt pathetic. She sighed.

Rachel nodded, slowly getting up from her seat and reaching out a hand to both of her mothers. The others in the room disappeared for a moment and in Rachel's mind there was just the three of them, holding hands.

"I don't know what I think either Mama. It's all mixed up inside my head now. Is that ok?" Rachel asked. "I think there is a God but nobody who goes to church and talks about the Bible has been very nice to me. And Santa gave me both of you. I prayed and prayed for my mommy to find me. God did not listen to my prayer but Santa gave me you."

Shelby could not stand it anymore. She reached down and picked up her baby girl and held her close. Mother and daughter cried silent tears. It was Cass who answered Rachel. Shelby was too upset. Her parents had been highly religious though. They did a number on her before becoming traitors and selling off her baby.

"It's alright to still be working things out in your mind about God and what you believe," Cass told the little girl, bending down to her knees to look into Rachel's brown eyes. "There is no set time you have to make your mind up about what you believe when it comes to religious things." Cass reached over and petted Rachel's brown hair and then did the same to Shelby's. The blonde leaned down to cup Shelby's cheek and wiped a stray tear away.

Rachel looked up into her mother's green eyes with questioning brown eyes. Shelby took a breath and tried to gather her thoughts.

"Baby girl, some people on this earth spend their whole lives trying to figure out what they think about why they are on the earth and the meaning of life. At nine years old, I think it's perfectly acceptable you are still figuring what you think is the truth and what you want to put your faith in," Dee Corcoran interjected. The oldest Corcoran had been listening and watching the conversation going on between family members. Seeing that her niece was still getting her thoughts together and having spent a great deal of time thinking of such things as she traveled the world, Dee had to join the conversation.

Rachel twisted around to look at her Auntie Dee Dee and cocked her head. It was obvious to those at the table that Rachel was thinking about what had been told her by both her mama and the oldest of the three Corcorans.

"Have you figured it out yet, Dee?" Holly quipped, "You have been to Tibet and climbed the mountain, after all."

"I have spoken to holy men and women all over the world," Dee answered honestly. "All are seeking to live an honest life…a good, fulfilling lifestyle…their idea of a higher power and the guidebook differs." Dee stopped briefly and reached over to sip some wine out of her glass. "I tend to think it's the journey and how you live your life as you travel up the mountain. What's up at the top of that mountain might be different on my path compared to yours. The truth you embrace up there is personal. It's the journey."

Natalie listened carefully, closing her Bible. In truth, she felt just as mixed up as Rachel. Her father had been spewing lies while violating her for most of her life. She felt now like she was going to go on her own journey. The young teenager somehow felt she was in a good place with good people to take it. She did not quite trust Holly and April enough to tell them that just yet, though. She might tell Rachel when they were alone sometime. For now it was enough for the teenager to see Holly's smile and the way April liked to play with her hair. She felt safe and free to work this out as well as all of the other stuff with her dad, knowing the two women were in her corner.

"Mommy?" Rachel asked, looking into her mother's face. Rachel thought her mother looked like an angel and sung like one too. Surely, she must know something about all of this.

"I am not sure what I think. What my mom and dad believed caused them to treat me and you very badly while I was pregnant with you. I resented that and have run from it since I was just a little older than Natalie," Shelby verbalized from deep within her heart to her family and dearest of friends. Rachel snuggled in close to her birth mother, somehow knowing her mother needed comfort that only she could give. "But you know Rachel, lately…" Shelby leaned forward and kissed Rachel's head before continuing. "I don't think our reunion was just chance. I guess I believe life is more than chances or luck. There is something in control. I have spent my life looking and hoping for you to come back to me."

"I am here now, mommy," Rachel promised her mother, reaching up to play with Shelby's soft long hair that Rachel felt was softer than even Barbra's fur.

"I know, baby and that is my truth and I owe thanks to someone or something above myself," Shelby spoke tenderly at her daughter before looking over at her wife, then her aunt, then April, Holly and finally Natalie. "The rest, well, it's complicated, even for me to figure out..."

"We will figure it out," Rachel promised her mother then looked up at her mama. "Because we are keepers."

"Yes, Rachel," Cass promised, wrapping an arm around Shelby's shoulder with one hand while reaching over to kiss Rachel's forehead. "We are definitely keepers."