CHAPTER FIVE
THE DEMENTOR
Arthur looked down at the pages.
"Chapter Five…the Dementor"
"DEMENTOR?!" Molly exclaimed.
"You know. The Azkaban guard." Tonks joked.
"So soon in the book?" Bill asked.
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"But, you DID drop tea on the photo." Ginny stated.
"But it was an accident!" Ron declared.
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"Molly!" McGonagall gasped.
"Who would have thought it?" Sirius teased.
"I had been young and foolish at the time. And it was before love potions were banned from school."
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"More like that damn cat getting indigestion." Ron muttered.
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"What is the deal with all the green?" Charlie asked.
"It compliments Harry's eyes." Ginny said.
Everyone turned to her. Snape looked disgusted.
"It was a JOKE!" Ginny said in her defense.
Arthur decided to save his daughter from any embarrassment.
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The Weasley parents sighed.
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"Should have done that the year before." Remus said.
"There wasn't any time." Molly defended herself.
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"Ah. Your first inside joke." Tonks teased.
"I remember James and Lily's." Remus said. "OW!"
Sirius had whacked his so-called friend.
"What was it?" Harry asked.
"It was nothing." Sirius said.
"C'mon Sirius." Ron pleaded.
"Might as well." Snape said deciding to go for it.
"You're actually interested in the first inside joke between James and Lily?" Sprout asked stunned.
"If it makes Black THIS uncomfortable, it'll be worth it." Snape said.
"Later." Remus promised with a wink after receiving a death glare from Sirius. "Arthur?"
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"Don't I always?" Harry asked.
"You don't want us to answer that Mr. Potter." McGonagall said.
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"You told him even though I told you not to?" Molly asked her husband.
"I didn't need to anyways." Arthur said.
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"I couldn't agree more." Remus said.
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McGonagall whacked Snape for the look on his face that said that he wasn't so sure about that.
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Fred, George, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Flitwick, Sprout, and McGonagall laughed at that.
"The day THAT happens is the day the Dark Lord takes up knitting." Snape said.
"Knitting is actually quite relaxing." Dumbledore stated.
"Maybe he should then." Fred said.
"But You-Know-Who probably doesn't know how to." George said.
"True." Fred mused before snapping his fingers. "We'll take away his wand and Mum can teach!"
"And what makes you think I'm going through with that?" Molly asked. "Need I remind you two that he is the mastermind behind the deaths of your uncles' deaths."
"We weren't done Mum." George said.
"You can 'accidentally' choke him with the scarf he makes." Fred suggested.
"Or stab him with the knitting needles." George added.
"I worry about what goes on in your heads." Hermione admitted.
"Were they dropped as kids?" Tonks asked Charlie.
"Bill and I MIGHT have had a few incidents." Charlie whispered.
But not low enough.
"WHAT!?" Molly exclaimed.
"That explains SO much." Ron said.
"It couldn't be as much as Harry was." Remus said with a teasing smirk.
"WHAT!?" Molly and Harry both exclaimed and looked to Sirius with death glares.
"It was Peter!" Sirius defended before adding. "And the ONE time I dropped Harry, he bit me and Remus caught him before he hit while we were babysitting."
"Sirius…Harry didn't have any TEETH at the time though he had been teething and your finger was the most available thing." Remus reminded him. "But, you do have a point. Most of the times Harry was dropped was when he was being held by Peter."
"So he's been out to kill me since the beginning." Harry pouted.
"And that didn't tell you guys anything?" Moody asked.
"Wormtail could barely hold a cup without dropping it." Sirius said. "And Lily felt that he just needed to get used to holding Harry."
Hermione turned to Ron and pointed a finger into his face.
"You are going to practice with dolls before I let you hold any kids." She instructed.
"Hey! I'm not as bad as Neville."
"EVERYONE is going to practice before they hold any of my children." Hermione declared.
Ron motioned for Harry who leaned across his godfather.
"Remind me to ask Mr. Granger if SHE was dropped." Ron whispered while gesturing towards Hermione.
"Can we get back to the story?" Flitwick asked.
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"For the best." Sirius recalled. "At the time, all I wanted was to kill Peter and I wasn't going to let ANYTHING stand in my way."
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"They usually find me anyways." Harry added.
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Ron and Hermione exchanged a look.
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"Ronald!" Molly scolded.
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"CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" Moody shouted.
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"Good answer." Sirius said.
"What?" Remus asked.
"You're described as 'quite young.' You're not that much older than me." Sirius said.
McGonagall rolled her eyes before motioning for Arthur to continue.
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"Yeah? How did you know that?" Bill asked.
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"Don't judge a book by its cover." Dumbledore stated.
"Yeah. Look at Lockhart." Hermione said.
"Actually, that one you can. Now, if he was a mess THEN his stories would be more believable." Tonks stated.
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"Don't underestimate Remus. He's had to live with me and James for ten years." Sirius said.
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"Well, you don't try to stay away." Ron argued.
"Yeah. All you need now is the large neon sign." Hermione teased.
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"Why was it going off?" Tonks asked.
"There was something untrustworthy in the room. In a certain someone's pocket." Hermione answered.
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"In person once you got back to England." Hermione answered. "As a belated gift."
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"Truthfully, I was already up" Remus admitted. "I was faking so it wouldn't be so awkward."
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"Yeah, thanks for that." Harry said sarcastically.
"How was I supposed to know you didn't get the form signed. It's not like you told me."
"Have you SEEN my uncle? You've seen the Christmas gifts…and the bars on the window."
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"Not really" Sirius chuckled. "Though I must say, our presence helped."
"How DID you manage it under our noses?" McGonagall asked.
"We're just that clever." Sirius bragged.
"In other words," Remus said. "James transfigured the books on the subject to the thickness of comic books and fit them in their text books."
"Bloody brilliant!" the twins chorused as Molly glared at Remus for giving them the idea.
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"Nothing new." Ginny said with a shrug as Hermione glared at Ron.
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"You were leaving me alone with Hermione. You know how dangerous that is?" Ron asked.
"Meaning?" Hermione asked dangerous.
"Dad. Read." Ron said.
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"That's all you had to do." The twins chorused.
"FRED! GEORGE!" Molly scolded.
"How you two know is beyond me." Bill said.
"I would understand a few passages, but EVERY passage?" Sirius asked skeptically. "FEW know that answer. I'm not even sure Dumbledore knows."
"Even I am not aware of all the secrets Hogwarts hold." Dumbledore confirmed.
"If you ask me, they had outside help." Snape said.
"And just whom are you implying Severus?" Molly asked venomously.
"If I find out, you'll be the first to know." Snape promised her.
The twins gulped.
"I know who." Remus answered.
"WHO!?" Sirius, the heads of houses, and the parents asked.
"I'm sure the answer will be given in the book and we can't get any further unless Arthur reads."
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"So why did you bother asking?" McGonagall asked.
"Worth a shot." Harry said with a shrug.
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"I was actually asleep at this." Remus admitted.
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"It'll take more than a rough night to do Remus in." Sirius bragged.
"I'm not immortal." Remus said.
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Snape got his quill ready.
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"Not really creative, is he?" Charlie asked.
"You're just NOW figuring that out?" Bill asked. "We're talking Malfoy."
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"Get that boy under control." Molly growled at Snape.
Snape felt himself gulp.
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"Good question." Molly said nervously.
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"It can't break down." Bill said nervously. "It runs on magic."
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"Not quite." Harry whispered.
Sirius noticing how nervous Harry was, wrapped an arm around the shivering boy.
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"Not a wise move." George stated.
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"Were you REALLY looking for Ron?" Fred asked.
"Or another third year who had saved you the year before?" George added.
Ginny whacked the twins upside the heads.
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"Dementors." Tonks said with a shiver.
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"Was it attempting the kiss!?" Tonks demanded.
"No. It was just hungry so it was killing two birds with one stone: Searching for Sirius and getting some lunch." Remus answered.
Everyone sort of relaxed.
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"Who screamed?" Flitwick asked.
"It's answered later." Remus said as he placed a gentle hand on Harry's shoulder.
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"But the book said someone screamed." Charlie argued.
"I'll explain later." Remus said figuring Harry wouldn't want to be in the room when everyone learned just who screamed. It was going to be hard enough when it's mentioned in the book.
And from what he remembered about the side lessons, it was REALLY going to be hard on himself and Sirius. Especially that one time when Harry heard James.
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"First time a Defense Professor actually sounded like he knew what he was talking about." Ron said.
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"Good description." Arthur agreed.
"No wonder Azkaban is so horrid." Molly whispered.
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"I felt close to fainting." Ginny said closing her eyes. "I felt like I was back in the chamber."
The twins sandwiched her and wrapped their arms around their little sister.
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"Because nobody had witnessed what you did." Sirius answered.
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"Everyone else does." Harry defended.
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"Hard to miss Hagrid." Sirius chuckled.
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"It's really none of his business." Molly huffed.
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"He's one to talk." Fred muttered.
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"No respect at all." McGonagall sighed before sending Snape a death glare.
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"Most of the time, that's the reason." Harry explained.
"He has a point." Sirius told McGonagall.
She just rolled her eyes at her former pupil before turning to Harry.
"Not ALL the time Mr. Potter. My office door is always open to my Gryffindors and any other student if they want to talk about certain things like family, friends, relationship problems, ailments, or any other things."
Ron leaned over Sirius and Harry leaned over as well to keep the conversation as private as possible, which wasn't that possible.
"I thinks she's trying to hint something to you mate."
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"I believe Madam Pomfrey has asked if it would be possible to engrave the 'Potter' name onto one of the beds." Dumbledore said.
"WHAT?!" Harry exclaimed. "Please tell me you told her no!"
"I managed to convince her to postpone that act…for the time being." Dumbledore said.
Harry pouted and make a silent promise to not wind up in that corridor EVER.
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Sirius laughed…loudly.
Remus glared at his friend who just fell off the couch.
"What is so funny?" Remus asked.
"With as much time as YOU spent there, it's YOUR name she should have engraved on a bed." Sirius said. "Acting like she doesn't know you. That's just too funny."
"She only said that because if it was known she knew Mr. Lupin before, it would create suspicion as to his condition." McGonagall said.
"Age should be a good clue though." Bill argued. "After all, you're talking about the Meddling kids of Gryffindor."
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"Stupid question! Stupid question! Stupid question! Stupid question!" the twins chorused as if they were a siren.
"Ginny. Whack them." Harry requested.
She obliged willingly.
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"That wasn't subtle at ALL!" Tonks muttered under her breath at Dumbledore's mention of invisibility cloaks.
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"Didn't do too good of a job, did he?" Ron whispered to Harry.
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"Two?" Moody asked suspiciously.
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"That's the understatement of the year." George laughed.
"Decade." Fred corrected.
"Century."
"Millennium!"
"Boys!" Molly scolded. "I'm sure the book is just exaggerating."
"No it's not." Everyone who spent September through June at Hogwarts for the past four years chorused.
"And the feeling is mutual." Ron added.
Arthur decided to continue to prevent another argument.
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"Actually," Remus admitted. "The look Severus gave me was pretty tame compared to the look he used to give James."
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"ALRIGHT!" Sirius cheered.
"He deserves it after what he's been through." Charlie added very pleased before pouting.
"What's wrong?" Bill asked.
"I could have had HAGRID for a Magical Creatures professor. You kids are SO LUCKY!"
Ron threw his best friends looks that asked if his brother was serious.
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"I had been petrified for half the time we knew Hagrid's name was involved." Hermione argued.
"But you were the one who figured out the monster and how it got around without being seen by anyone except Mrs. Norris, Colin, Justin, Nick, you, and Penelope." Harry argued.
"Yeah. Without you, both Ginny and Harry would be dead in the chamber and You-Know-Who would have been back since that June as a 16 year old boy." Ron added.
"Gee. Thanks Ron." Harry gasped as Sirius tightened his grip on his godson after the reminder of the Chamber.
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"That's it for this chapter." Arthur said.
"When should we break for lunch?" Ron asked.
"Let me see the book." Hermione said taking it from Arthur. She flipped through the book and looked at the titles on the top of the pages. "I think we should break after we read Chapter Nine."
"Why then?" Bill asked.
"You'll know later." Hermione said. "I might as well read next."
