A/N I hope there are a few Jonathan Creek lover's reading this story! 'Cause I added a little twist to 'The Elephant in the room'!
Lovesagoodstory19 Mollykins really just can't help herself... Yeah I really do like her in the series, but she's also really getting on Kyrie's nerves in this story and the bashing just... kind of happens! I'm glad you like the rework of the speech. It felt a bit OOC but, since he was already revealing more of his personal views in that episode anyway, I felt I could get away with it.
Katt96 Yeah, he's adorable! So many cute moments still to come!
Thewickedprincess You will have to wait a bit for the belt to reveal its little secret. I'm glad you liked Kyrie's reactions ;-)
DreamonAlina Aw, I'm glad you liked the speech. Here, have a tissue -throws entire box-
Artemis7448 I hope this chapter will put a smile on your face again!
Enjoy, my dears!
SSS
The guests started to murmur again. This new direction of his speech was apparently received much better by all. John and Mary smiled.
"Mary, when I say you deserve this man, it is the highest compliment of which I am capable. John, you have endured war, and injury, and tragic loss..."
He leaned closer to John. "... so sorry again about that last one..." He straightened up again and turned to look down at Kyrie.
"... deeply sorry..." he told her, softly.
Their eyes locked for a brief moment and she saw in his, again, the deep regret.
"I already forgave you, remember?" she whispered.
"You may have to remind me again, later," he whispered back. The look he gave her made her heartbeat go into overdrive.
"Anyway," he said, turning his attention back to Mary and John. "Know this... Today you sit between the woman you have made your wife and the man you have saved, with the help of this woman here who has the great misfortune of finding herself married to me..."
Or the great fortune, Kyrie thought to herself as she smiled up at him.
"In short, the three people who love you most in all this world. And I know I speak for Mary and Kyrie as well when I say we will never let you down, and we have a lifetime ahead to prove that."
His words had reduced most guests to tears. Mrs Hudson was crying silently into her handkerchief, a few men dabbed at their eyes with various pieces of cloth... one even used the bloody tablecloth!
Molly too wiped at the moist that was pooling in her eyes with her serviette. The look of pity was replaced by a look of longing whenever she looked in Sherlock's direction and a look of helpless envy whenever Molly briefly glanced over at Kyrie.
If Molly hadn't been so weird in her attitude towards her, Kyrie would have been able to sympathise with her... to some degree. She knew from experience that, once Sherlock had managed to get under your skin, it was close to impossible to get rid of him, or to ignore the emotions that came with it. Right now, she felt like blowing her a raspberry.
She smiled when she could hear John whisper to Mary, "If I try and hug him, stop me."
"Certainly not," she assured him and patted his arm.
Seemingly unaware of the emotions he'd managed to evoke, Sherlock moved on to his next card.
"Ah, yes. Now on to some funny stories about John..." He suddenly trailed off when he looked up, all ready to start some funny anecdotes, when he noticed most of his guests were a blubbering mess.
He never did like outbursts of emotion. It made him feel awkward because he couldn't relate and he always had to waste time, waiting for those silly emotions to subside before he could finally partake in the situation again.
"What's wrong? What happened?"Sherlock started rambling again in his rapid fire speech. "Why are you all doing that? John?" He turned to look at his friend as if he held the answer. Kyrie knew he could get a bit flustered when people did not respond the way he expected them to.
"Did I do it wrong?" he asked John, sounding a bit self-conscious.
John promptly got to his feet. "No, you didn't. Come here," he said, his voice a bit gruff with emotion. He then caught Sherlock unawares and pulled him into a tight hug. The guests broke into applause uttering more 'aw's and 'oh's' while Sherlock stiffened under this sudden display of emotion.
Though Kyrie would have loved nothing more than to get up and give him a hug and a kiss herself, she knew he would not appreciate her making an exhibit of themselves... or him.
"I haven't finished yet," Sherlock stated.
"Yeah, I know, I know," John said to him. Sherlock held up the next card and tried to read it, as John slowly released him from his hug. "So, on to some funny stories..."
"Can you – can you wait 'til I sit down?" John interrupted him, clapping him on his back.
Sherlock conceded with a quick nod of his head. He had no choice but to ride out the applause. He looked terribly uncomfortable gaining all this kind of attention. When John sat down, he cleared his throat in a silent cue for his guests. The guests finally quieted down.
"So, on to some funny stories about John," Sherlock tried again. John started to chuckle but a lot of guests were still affected by Sherlock's unexpected moving speech.
"If you could all just cheer up a bit, that would..." Sherlock said, sounding a bit annoyed. The guests immediately started to laugh again. Dear Lord, he was playing them like a fiddle!
"... be better."
When Kyrie noticed the soft expression of silent longing on Molly's face, Kyrie couldn't help but look back at her with a mixture of pity and annoyance. Someone really needed to help her out of the fantasy of Sherlock potentially falling in love with her.
Molly's crush on her husband kept her from moving on to something real, and at the moment, something real was sitting right next to her.
Though Kyrie didn't particularly like Molly at the moment, she did want Molly to find happiness in a love that was actually attainable to her. Also, she didn't like the prospect of having to watch Molly nearly swoon at the sight of her husband for the rest of their 'acquaintance'. Especially now that she and Sherlock were testing the waters of romance themselves.
"On we go. So, for funny stories..." Sherlock started as he reached down into his trouser pocket and took out his phone. "... one has to look no further than John's blog." He grinned as he held up his phone.
John chuckled and leaned in towards Mary. "Here we go," he said to her with a smile. Kyrie leaned over a bit and grinned at him, giving him a thumbs up.
"The record of our time together. Of course, he does tend to romanticise things a bit, but then, you know..." Sherlock slightly turned his head to look at John and Mary.
Though Kyrie couldn't see the look he sent them, she did detect the humour in his voice when he said, "... he's a romantic."
Kyrie smiled. That was true about John!
"Though I probably should be very grateful my wife decided to record our time together by scrap-booking instead of writing a blog. I have a feeling she would be even worse!" He turned his head to give her a humoured smirk.
The guests started to chuckle again but immediately quieted down when he gave them a look.
"We've tackled some strange cases..." Sherlock then continued his story and summed up a few examples. "The Hollow Client, the Poison Giant..."
Kyrie smiled at his words. They were cases John had minutely written about in his blog.
"We've had some frustrating cases. 'Touching' cases," Sherlock told the guests, rolling his eyes.
"... and of course I have to mention the elephant in the room."
Kyrie guffawed, earning her disapproving looks from both Sherlock as the guests. She looked over at Janine and winked at her. She couldn't help herself. They had both been around for that one. Actually, it had been a joke, all designed by Kyrie, Janine and her older sister Kathryn.
She had complained to Janine about Sherlock and how he always claimed to be able to keep a confident composure, even when confronted with the unexpected.
An idea struck, a plan was designed and a lot of strings were pulled... Kyrie didn't even want to know how Kathryn had so many... unconventional connections.
The end result was an actual elephant, obtained through one of Kathryn's friends owning a travelling circus, planted in what was supposed to look like an ordinary room, but was actually a clever set design, created by one of Kathryn's other friends... a designer of illusions for a big stage magician.
Though this Jonathan Creek guy seemed a bit of an odd fish, with his aura of simplicity that was completely belied by his ingenuity and lateral thinking ability, Kyrie thought that Kathryn might have a secret crush on him.
Via a hidden camera, Kyrie, Janine, Kathryn and Jonathan, had been able to monitor – and tape – every detail of the reactions of her Baker Street boys, coming face to face with an actual elephant. And... it... was... priceless!
Those looks of incomprehension on their faces... their eyes flared open as they couldn't believe what they were seeing. To Sherlock's great credit, he hadn't lost his cool composure. His back had been ramrod straight as always. He had not however, been able to prevent his lips from parting briefly in shocked surprise when the elephant loudly trumpeted, before he quickly closed his mouth again.
"So, that is the Great Sherlock Holmes," Janine had whispered. "He is a handsome devil!" Kyrie lightly ribbed her and Jonathan smiled a bit tightly when Kathryn too chuckled at her younger sister's comment.
Though of course Sherlock did figure out it had been a set up and he knew she'd somehow been involved, to this day, he still didn't know how it had been done. Maybe she should invite Jonathan Creek to come over one day. Maybe arrange Kathryn to be there as well? She had an inkling that watching Creek and Sherlock, in one room, would make for a very memorable evening.
"But we want something... very particular for this special day, don't we?" Sherlock told the guests. He briefly looked down at his phone before he raised his eyes again. "The Bloody Guardsman."
Kyrie's mind drifted back to that particular day and she smiled fondly. It was when she and Mary had decided that both of their boys needed a bit of reassurance. Though they tried to not outwardly show it, the women knew the men well enough to realise they were terrified of the change the marriage would bring.
They both needed to understand that, though the couples would each live in their respective homes, the boys could still work together and solve cases together. That day, they were more pre-occupied with planning the wedding and Mary and Kyrie had decided the boys needed a break from the wedding stuff...
Sherlock was standing in the living room, staring at his wall of information behind the sofa. For once, the wall was not covered in 'people to monitor to solve a murder' stuff but rather 'things we need to do to plan a wedding' stuff.
John was sitting in his old armchair looking at his phone, while Mary and Kyrie were sitting at the dinner table, plotting all kinds of wedding things, they even had a 3D cardboard model of the reception venue.
"Need to work on your half of the church, Mary. Looking a bit thin," Sherlock said, turning around so he could look at her.
"Oh," Mary said, looking up. "Orphan's lot. Friends, that's all I have. Lots of friends," she said, winking at Kyrie.
Sherlock had already moved on to a different topic in his mind. "You should have the organ music to begin at precisely 11.48," he muttered.
"But the rehearsal's not for another two weeks. Just calm down," she admonished him.
"Calm? I am calm," Sherlock balked at the very notion that he wasn't, "I'm extremely calm.
"Let's get back to the reception, come on," Kyrie prodded him.
"Kyrie, you think I picked the right dishes for the menu?" Mary asked.
"Yes, you did! The menu is lovely and you've even given a choice. Fish, meat or vegetarian. It's lovely!"
"Aw, thanks, sweetie!"
Sherlock walked over to the table and Mary handed him an RSVP card. "John's cousin. Top table?"
Sherlock briefly glanced at tit. "Hmm. Hates you. Can't even bear to think about you.
Kyrie and Mary both looked up at him. "Seriously?" Mary asked.
"Second class post, cheap card..." He sniffed and pulled a face, "... bought at a petrol station. Look at the stamp... three attempts at licking. She's obviously unconsciously retaining saliva."
"Ah," Mary said, exchanging a look with Kyrie. "Let's stick her by the bogs. Sorry John!"
"No prob," he muttered.
"Nice!" Kyrie winked at Mary as Sherlock said, "Oh yes."
He then sat down to join them at the dinner table. Mary immediately leaned closer towards him. "Who else hates me?" she asked, a mischievous glint lighting her eyes. Sherlock promptly handed her a sheet of paper with a long list of names on it.
Kyrie snorted.
"Oh great – thanks!" Mary said, looking at the names of the people who only pretended to like her.
"Priceless painting nicked. Looks interesting," John suddenly said, still looking at his phone.
Mary and Kyrie looked at the amount of paperwork on the table.
"Table four..."
"Done," Sherlock stated.
"My husband is three people," John said with a chuckle.
"Table five," Mary said.
Sherlock looked at the list. "Major James Sholto. Who he?"
"Oh, John's old commanding officer. I don't think he's coming," Mary explained.
"He'll be there," John said from his seat.
"Well, he needs to RSVP, then," Mary said.
"He'll be there," John insisted.
"Mmm…"
"My husband is three people," John read aloud from his phone. "It's interesting. Says he has three distinct patterns of moles on his skin."
Sherlock raised himself to his feet. "Identical triplets – one in half a million births. Solved it without leaving the flat," he said in his rapid fire way. "Now, serviettes."
He walked over to the coffee table and squatted down. He reached under it and pulled out a tray with two differently folded serviettes. He gestured at them and looked up expectantly, awaiting their input.
"Swan, or Sydney Opera House?"
"Where'd you learn to do that?!" Mary asked in surprise.
Kyrie grinned seeing a faint hint of pinkness stain his cheeks. She knew exactly where and how he learned to do that. She had caught him red-handed, so to speak.
"Many unexpected skills required in the field of criminal investigation..." He tried to smooth talk his way out of this one, but Mary just beamed at him.
"Fibbing, Sherlock," she said.
"I once broke an alibi by demonstrating the exact severity of..." Sherlock continued.
"I'm not John. I can tell when you're fibbing. Also, Kyrie will tell me anyway and from the look on her face... She knows exactly how you acquired this skill."
"Okay – I learned it on YouTube," he admitted begrudgingly.
"My husband, a man of many talents!" Kyrie stated proudly, winking at Sherlock. He gave her a crooked smile.
"Opera House, please," Mary requested.
Kyrie pouted. "Aw! I like the swan! It's so pretty!"
"It's Mary's wedding," Sherlock stated. "Her opinion is the one that counts in this."
Kyrie crumpled up a sheet of paper and threw it at his head. "Rude!" she said.
He shrugged his shoulders. "It's still true."
Mary grinned at the two before she suddenly leaned to the side to reach into her trouser pocket.
"Ooh, hang on. I'm buzzing."
She took out her phone and lifted it to her ear. "Hello?" she asked, listened for a second and promptly got to her feet. "Oh, hi, Beth!"
John looked up from his phone and watched Mary disappearing through the doors of the kitchen.
Kyrie bit her lip, trying not to smile.
"Actually, if that's Beth, it's probably for me too. Hang on," John excused himself and followed his fiancée to the kitchen.
"Could they be even more conspicuous about it?" Sherlock asked as he lowered himself to the floor cross-legged, right in front of the coffee table. "What are they up to?"
"Oh, they just want to argue in peace I guess. Mary is trying to convince John to work a case with you," Kyrie said casually.
"Mm?" Sherlock asked, sounding distracted.
Kyrie rolled her eyes. She was supposed to work him, while Mary was working John. It would make things easier if he actually paid attention to what she was saying.
"You know John loves Mary and he's thrilled to marry her. He's also afraid of the change. He's worried he'll lose his best friend and that you will stop working cases with him. Mary is trying to convince him it's nonsense to think like that."
"It is nonsense," Sherlock muttered. "Of course I won't stop working cases with him!"
"Well, prove it to him then! When they get back and John asks you to take a case, take one."
"What are you doing?" she asked suspiciously when he didn't reply.
"Nothing," he said quickly, too quickly. Kyrie looked up. Her mouth dropped open in surprise.
Just that moment, John walked back into the living room and immediately stopped dead in his tracks.
Sherlock, who had his head propped up on one hand, lifted his head to briefly glance at John. He gestured at the small collection of folded serviettes folded in the Sydney Opera House shape in front of him. There were seven neatly set on the coffee table, with at least ten or so more strewn around the floor.
"That just sort of... happened," Sherlock offered in terms of explanation.
Kyrie smiled lovingly at him. Helping to plan with the wedding... he took the responsibility very seriously and performed his tasks with gusto. It brought out a rarely seen side of him that only made her love him even more than she already did. If that was even possible. Sometimes, her heart felt so completely filled with love, it physically hurt to the point where she thought it would burst.
Though there were also times he could be so incredibly annoying, callous and dispassionate, she could just throttle him.
John shot a nervous glance back at the kitchen, where Mary was still talking to 'Beth'. Well, John was here, on his own, hopefully Mary had been able to bring her point across. He kind of looked as if he didn't have a clue how to begin. Kyrie decided to help him out a bit.
"Aren't you tired of all this wedding stuff yet, John?" Kyrie asked while holding up the different coloured pieces of fabric.
John licked his lips nervously.
"You look like you could use a break."
Sherlock raised himself from the floor when John pulled back the chair where Mary had been sitting and sat down.
"I could, actually," he admitted.
Sherlock briefly looked in the direction of the kitchen before he sat down as well.
"Kyrie, no offence, I know this is as close as you can get to a real wedding... as long as you need to stay married to Sherlock of course... So, I understand why you are enjoying this and like to be so involved in everything," John started rambling.
Kyrie briefly exchanged looks with Sherlock. John was right. This was as close to a real wedding she would ever get. She was, in a way, pretending she was not just helping Mary plan her wedding, but also her own. Though she wasn't very sorry that she never had a wedding reception of her own, she had to admit she would have loved to have the chance to wear a real wedding gown.
Sherlock had a questioning look in his eyes. She didn't know what he was thinking, but she could make a guess. Kyrie smiled brightly at him, knowing she wouldn't trade him for anything in the world. Certainly not for a dress you'd get to wear for one day.
The look in his eyes softened and he smiled back at her.
"Look, I've smelled eighteen different perfumes; I've sampled..." he paused, looking away to think,
"... nine different slices of cake which all tasted identical. I like the bridesmaids in purple..."
"Lilac," Sherlock corrected him.
"... lilac," John echoed.
"Mine will be violet," Kyrie said with a dreamy smile.
"Obviously," Sherlock stated. "There should be some distinction between the matron of honour and the other bridesmaids. Usually accomplished by a slightly different colour or even the style of dress. Mary picked violet because she felt it would compliment your eyes."
"Do you?" she asked him with a smile. He quickly looked away though and John cleared his throat.
"Um, there are no more decisions left to make. I don't even understand the decisions that we have made. I'm faking opinions and it's exhausting, so please, before she comes back..."
He glanced over his shoulder in Mary's direction and activated the screen of his phone. He cleared his phone and shoved it near Sherlock's face. "... pick something," John ordered him.
Sherlock's eyes flickered down to the screen a few times.
"Anything. Pick one," John insisted.
"Pick what?" he asked confused.
John blinked at him and Kyrie stifled a laugh. Ah, for a man who claimed he was never – well, almost never – confused, he sure looked absolutely adorable when he was just that.
John chuckled. "A case! Your Inbox is bursting. Just... get me out of here."
Sherlock glanced at Kyrie who just sent him a pointed look and nodded slightly in John's direction.
"You want to go out on a case? N-now? Are you sure?"
"Please, Sherlock, for me," John pleaded. Sherlock cast a quick glance in the direction of the kitchen and took John's phone.
"Don't you worry about a thing. I'll get you out of this," he said quietly. "Kyrie understands completely, she won't breath a word."
He started scrolling through the messages that were posted in his website. It didn't take him long to find something that piqued his interest.
"Oh," he suddenly said before he read one of the messages aloud. "Dear Mr Holmes," he started. "My name is Bainbridge. I'm a Private in Her Majesty's Household Guard. I'm writing to you about a personal matter..."
"It usually is personal, isn't it?" Kyrie said. John shushed her and motioned Sherlock to continue.
"... one I don't care to bring before my superiors – it would sound so trivial – but I think someone's stalking me. I'm used to tourists, as it's part of the job, but this is different. Someone's watching me."
"Creepy... Oh, sorry," Kyrie said seeing the look on John's face.
"He's taking pictures of me every day. Don't want to mention it to the major, but it's really preying on my mind."
Sherlock fell silent, a look of quiet contemplation on his face as he stared at the phone. "Uniform fetishist. 'All the nice girls like a soldier.'"
"It's 'sailor'," John corrected him. And Bainbridge thinks his stalker is a bloke."
Sherlock looked at the phone again, but didn't say anything.
"Let's go and investigate. Please?"
"Elite Guard," Sherlock read aloud.
"Forty enlisted men and officers."
"Why this particular Welsh Guard? Curious."
"Now you're talking!" John replied with a grin.
Sherlock handed him back his phone, "Okay," he said. "Let's go."
They both got up and walked towards the doors when Mary came back from the kitchen.
"Bye," she said into the phone, smiling and cast a quizzical look at John.
"Er, we're just going to... I need, um, Sherlock to help me choose some, er, socks," John said as Sherlock simultaneously said, "...ties."
Kyrie rose to her feet with a broad smile on her face and went to stand next to Sherlock. She lightly patted his back for his attempt. Hiding herself a bit behind him, she winked at Mary who looked from one of the boys to the other.
"Why don't we go with socks?" she said pleasantly.
"Yeah," John agreed.
"I mean, you've got to get the right ones."
Kyrie looked down to hide her smile.
"Exactly – to go with my..."
"... tie," Sherlock tried again when John at the same time said, "... outfit."
"That'll take a while, right?" Mary asked John. He pointed towards the kitchen.
"My coat in there?" he asked.
"Yes," Mary said and walked a few steps after him.
Sherlock looked down at Kyrie. "Just going to take him out for a bit – run him," he said quietly.
Kyrie placed her hand on his chest and looked up at him with a smile. "I know," she said, her voice tender and full of warmth.
Sherlock beamed down at her.
Kyrie patted him on his chest. "Thank you, for finding him a case. He really needs to know things won't have to change."
"Mm," he said, glancing up to see that Mary was pre-occupied with John and promptly stole a brief kiss from her lips.
"Come on, Sherlock," John called him from kitchen doorway.
Sherlock pulled back from her. "Coming!" he yelled back.
He then turned and walked to the door of the living door. He turned to look back at her and gave her a double thumbs up, while giving her a meaningful grin. Kyrie smiled broadly and gave him a double thumbs up back. From the corner of her eyes, she saw that Mary was doing the exact same thing with John.
When the boys loudly bounded down the stairs, Mary and Kyrie gave each other one look, before they burst out laughing.
