The court stayed at Clissin for the week. Ashura spent some time with Lord Agmundr and the castle stewards and bailiffs, checking on the books and the state of the property, but Clissin was well managed and didn't require much oversight. He only put minimal effort into the ordinary kingdom business that always followed him everywhere, choosing instead to show Fai the castle and take him riding around the grounds, the farms, and the local forest.

Ashura had always been fond of Clissin. Of all the royal estates, it was the one that most looked like it belonged in a storybook, with its graceful towers and turrets and shining whitewashed walls. The castle was practically tailored to appeal to a child. That was why, out of all the properties at his disposal, Ashura had given Clissin to Fai. He had hoped it would capture Fai's imagination, as it had his own when he'd been a boy.

In that, it appeared he had been successful. Fai was enchanted by Clissin.

It was a pleasant, restful way to pass the days. The weather was fine and dry, perfect for exploring the countryside. Fai wanted to see every acre, every stream, every hill and tree—even every bird and hare, it seemed. The child still hadn't smiled, but his spirit seemed lighter, and he raced from place to place, looking at anything even remotely interesting that he encountered. He found a great many mundane things interesting. Ashura supposed Fai had never had this kind of experience before.

It was really quite delightful to watch. Ashura reflected that he might not have heard Fai's first words or guided his first, tottering baby steps, but at least he had this.

One afternoon, Fai lost his latest loose tooth and presented it to Ashura with glowing pride. Ashura preserved it in crystal and promised to enshrine it with the other two just as soon as they returned home.

There were several beautiful, clear nights, so he let Fai stay up late, despite the long length of the summer days and the lack of true darkness, and taught him a little about stargazing. Astronomy and astrology were a part of all magicians' educations, and although Fai was somewhat young for any serious lessons, he seemed to enjoy it. Ashura pointed out the most obvious and easily identified constellations in the deep blue sky. He talked about the wandering stars, and how the positions of the sun, moon, and stars were used to determine the passage of time and the seasons. He spoke of how such things helped the people decide the best times for preparing the land, planting the crops, and harvesting them. Once a brilliant meteor soundlessly flashed by in a long arc and dissolved into a lovely flurry of glittering sparkles.

The moon rose early those nights, a slender, glowing sickle waxing amid the gem-bright stars. Fai demonstrated a particular and immediate fascination for the crescent moon. "Oh," he said, "I love the moon. It's so perfect just like that. I wish I could touch it and keep it." He couldn't take his eyes off it.

Ashura made a light reply and let Fai indulge himself with moon-gazing. After the child fell asleep, Ashura carried him inside and put him to bed. With sadness, Ashura gazed at Fai's peaceful face and recalled how crescent moons had been the major decorative theme at the Witch of Dimensions' abode. Although the dark sorcerer had done his best to own Fai's body and soul, Fai's affinity for the crescent moon seemed a clear sign that he instead would one day belong to the Witch. Or rather, he would if he survived both Ashura's impending decision, and also whatever plans the sorcerer intended for him. Fai's affinity for the crescent moon and its probable meaning left Ashura even more conflicted than he had been before.

What would be, would be. For once, he would not permit himself to dwell on future horrors. He took refuge in Fai's enthusiasm and obvious appreciation for all Clissin had to offer, and deliberately did not allow himself to think of anything beyond enjoying the present.

The idyll was far too short. Soon, they said their farewells to Clissin and its people, and were back on the road, heading for the Southlands.

After years of practice, Ashura could assess the state of the roads, properties, and countryside with half a mind. So he passed the time in conversation, and spent some of the journey discussing the kingdom with Fai. There was no reason Fai should not continue his lessons about Seresu, even unknowingly while viewing the scenery on horseback.

They rode three abreast, with Fai in between Ashura and Kendappa. They talked about the geography, especially of the regions they passed through, and also about how the country was organized and governed. Since they were going to the Southlands, Ashura focused on the situation of the border lords.

"Their leaders are among the greatest magnates in the country," he told Fai, "with large armies and power. The lesser border lords swear fealty to the greater who rule over them. The two strongest overlords, Lord Taishakuten and Lord Ilmarinen, have vast discretion over the exercise of their power and are almost like kings in their own territories."

"I remember who Lord Ilmarinen is. He's Lord Vainamoinen's older brother, right?" Fai said. "My tutor said he's the overlord of Pohjola."

"Yes," Ashura said. He noticed how Fai avoided mention of Lord Taishakuten, and hoped the time in the Southlands wouldn't be too hard on the boy. Perhaps Fai would become accustomed to Taishakuten, and lose some of his aversion to the warlord.

Then again, perhaps Fai was simply tired of hearing about the Southlands. It had been the main topic for much of the time, being the destination of the trip. Maybe Fai just wanted to hear about a different territory for a change. Ashura conceded that some variety might be good and allowed the drift in the conversation. "Vainamoinen's family rules the eastern border lands that abut the kingdom of Lintukoto."

"They have interesting names. They sound almost musical."

"That is because the lords of Pohjola maintain intimate connections with Lintukoto. Vainamoinen's family has intermarried with the nobility and lesser royalty of Lintukoto for centuries. Many of their names reflect their Lintukotoan origin. In fact, my late wife, Queen Luonnotar, was a princess of Lintukoto and a distant cousin of Vainamoinen's."

Ashura heard Kendappa draw a startled breath. When he turned to look at her, he saw that she was gaping at him with an almost comical expression of shock.

"Ashura?" she said softly, clenching her hands on her mount's reins.

He gave her a tiny smile. "It's all right, Kendappa."

She blinked but kept silent.

Ashura knew very well what had surprised her. But since Fai had come to Seresu, things had changed. He wasn't sure exactly when; the shift in his attitudes and emotions had been so gradual that he hadn't noticed until now. The memory of the tragic way his wife and children had died still hurt, and he still felt their absence, but the pain was no longer so keen and unbearable that he couldn't even think or speak of it. He could remember the joy of his time with Luonnotar without being overwhelmed by the pain of loss.

Fai didn't look surprised to hear about Luonnotar, although his expression bore unmistakable signs of wariness. Someone had probably told him the basics, and warned him to never speak of the late queen. Wise advice, Ashura thought, although now it seemed unnecessary. Somehow, this miracle child had healed that old, bitter wound in his heart. He gazed at Fai with mute gratitude.

Those big blue eyes stared back at him. Fai looked much the same as he had during Ashura's dream of killing him on the glacier, his precious little face so open and trusting. It would have to be soon... The latest wound in Ashura's heart gaped a little wider, raw and bleeding. How could he murder his son? How could he even consider it? It was too much to ask, even to save the world.

Yet he knew himself to be capable of it. If such was his decision, when the proper time came he would strangle his own heart and thrust a sword through Fai's without hesitation.

Moisture filmed his vision, and he blinked rapidly to clear it away.

"Your Majesty?" Fai said.

Ashura drew a deep breath. He didn't want to think of that for a while, not during the journey to the Southlands, but that nightmare simply would not leave him be. He pushed it away and offered Fai a faint smile.

"I'm sorry, Fai. I was just distracted by memories for a moment."

"You mean about..." the boy's voice trailed away, and he looked nervous.

"It's all right to talk about her, Fai." Ashura could feel Kendappa's attention fix on him intently, but he ignored her. "Has anyone told you how I met her?"

Fai shook his head. "Did you pick her from a list, like that list Lady Kendappa keeps trying to make you look at?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Ashura saw Kendappa stiffen indignantly. He grinned. To Fai he said, "It wasn't the same at all. A royal marriage is more a contract between countries or high noble houses than a simple union between two people. This time I have been provided with a list and not simply ordered to marry because I'm the king. Everyone has to at least pretend to humor my odd whims and crotchets." He flashed a toothy smile at Kendappa, who rolled her eyes. "But back then, I was barely twenty years old. I was still only the heir and had to do as I was told," he said with small chuckle, "and so Luonnotar was the only choice offered to me. My father and his council were greatly desirous of stronger ties with Lintukoto, and resolved to make a new blood bond with Lintukoto's ruling house. However, being told to get married to someone you've never even met before... Well, even then I knew my duty, but that didn't make it a comfortable situation."

"That means he was about as cooperative back then as he is now," Kendappa put in sourly. She had apparently gotten over her shock and regained her usual tart personality.

Confused, Fai said, "But you married her."

Ashura couldn't help but smile reminiscently. "Yes. But at first, I was a bit..." He hesitated, seeking the right choice of word. "Cautious," he finally said.

"Make that obstinate, bad tempered, sulky, and insufferable," Kendappa said, undermining his efforts at diplomacy. "He was impossible to live with, until..." Her eyes widened. "Oh, Ashura, you're not really going to tell him this story, are you? You'll just give him ideas for mischief, you know." But the corners of her mouth quirked.

Ashura cocked a brow at her. Personally, he thought that Fai needed more mischief in his life. The child was far too young to be so serious about everything. And if...if the worst came about... Ashura didn't let himself finish that thought, but he could never entirely escape the knowledge that soon he would have to choose a future. However, no matter what choice Ashura made, he was determined that Fai should have as much happiness in his young life as possible. And, in hindsight, it was an amusing story.

Fai's ravenous curiosity was out in full force. "So what happened?"

"Well, I was shown images of her, of course," Ashura said, "and told some rather idealized accounts of her. The envoys and ambassadors spoke only of her beauty, her sweet nature, her virtue and dedication to duty, and how she'd one day make such a perfect queen. In plain words, they made her sound deadly dull. I positively dreaded being bound forever to such a tiresome paragon and wanted to escape the marriage, but of course that was impossible. When it finally occurred to me that everyone was probably only gilding the lily, as it were, I decided to go see what she was like for myself."

He heard Kendappa, who already knew the whole story, utter an amused snort. "You were lucky you came out of that encounter relatively unscathed," she said.

"Luonnotar always did have a temper," Ashura acknowledged.

"You got exactly what you deserved."

"How unkind of you, cousin," he replied with twinkling eyes. To Fai, he said, "As you have probably guessed, my late wife and Kendappa got along swimmingly."

Fai's eyes swiveled from Ashura to Kendappa and back again. "Did you get in trouble with her?"

"With Luonnotar? In a manner of speaking, but only because I surprised her. Naturally, I had to keep my plans secret. No one would have ever allowed an unauthorized, unchaperoned visit like that between us. I slipped away from the castle, used magic to find her, and teleported to her location. It was all quite spontaneous."

"Spontaneous?" Kendappa snorted again. "You were careless. It was most fortunate that she wasn't in her bedchamber at the time, or you might have found yourself minus your head. By all accounts, her family had no sense of humor about that sort of thing."

Ashura smiled ruefully and continued, "Luonnotar had secluded herself in a private garden. It was high summer, and Lintukoto is somewhat warmer than Seresu, so it was a very pretty little place. But she wasn't exactly expecting company, and she had excellent reflexes." He paused for effect, then said, "Her attack was quite impressive."

"Attack?" Fai breathed.

"The royal family of Lintukoto produces excellent mages, just like in Seresu," Ashura said. "Her blast might well have done serious damage had I not instinctively put up a defensive shield. Fortunately, I have quick reflexes as well."

"You left out the part about how you got knocked down into a thorny gooseberry bush," Kendappa put in helpfully.

"Fai doesn't need to hear about that."

Fai, on the other hand, looked highly interested in hearing about that.

Ashura didn't give him a chance to ask any embarrassing questions. "As it turned out," he said, "she'd been given a rather idealized and boring account of me, as well. She'd also seen a picture of me, so she did recognize who I was when the dust settled."

"She got a good, leisurely look at him while he was struggling with the gooseberry bush," Kendappa told a wide-eyed and fascinated Fai. "That's when she realized who had just waylaid her. She thought it was pretty funny. She told me she couldn't stop laughing for a sennight."

"At any rate," Ashura said loudly over his cousin's chortling, "because of that unorthodox meeting, we both concluded that neither of us was quite so boring and hidebound as we had been led to believe, and we ultimately decided that we should suit, after all." He didn't add that he'd sulked while Luonnotar had laughed. He'd gotten over his pique fairly quickly, and through some miracle hadn't offended her by the bad temper his wounded pride had generated.

"Love at first blow, as it were," Kendappa snickered.

"We met secretly a few more times before the formal contract was signed and the betrothal announced. We had quite a difficult time pretending we'd never laid eyes on one another when she was brought to Seresu and we were formally wed. I believe only Kendappa knew the truth at the time. Even Tendulkar didn't know about it for several months." He looked over at his cousin. "You never did tell me how you originally found out about it. Luonnotar said she didn't tell you until after the wedding."

"I never reveal my sources or methods, Your Majesty," she replied demurely with lowered eyes. Her modest demeanor conflicted with her knowing grin. "You know that."

To Fai, Ashura said, "Kendappa always knows everything. There's little point in trying to keep secrets from her, especially embarrassing ones." Not that her knowledge in that case was really a great mystery. Kendappa had tended his cuts and scratches from that cursed gooseberry bush and listened to his complaints about the damage. He hadn't told her where he'd found a gooseberry bush with which to wrestle. Instead he had covered himself by telling her only that he'd gone wandering again and swearing her to secrecy. Kendappa had a quick mind. She had undoubtedly put all the pieces together and come up with the correct answer.

But now he had secrets that she would never learn, not until it was too late...

"That sounded fun, but it was a very strange way to get married," Fai said, carefully polite. "It doesn't seem fair that you weren't supposed to even meet her first."

Ashura had rather hoped that Fai might have at least yielded a tiny smile in response to the ridiculous story, but in that desire he was disappointed as always. Still, Fai did look... Well, not cheerful, but his expression had lightened in that indescribable way it often did when he was happy.

"Royal marriages are usually like that, Fai," he said. "What I did was, well, not exactly proper." He heard Kendappa snort again.

"Not that Luonnotar minded," his cousin said.

"No," Ashura said. "She was rather relieved by the whole thing. She'd been envisioning a stern, humorless prince who was completely obsessed with protocol and law. She relaxed a great deal once she stopped laughing at me."

"I wish I could have met Queen Luonnotar," Fai said next. "She sounds interesting."

Ashura's own mood sank a little as he considered the innocent words. Had Luonnotar lived, how different would things be now? Would he have still been condemned to future madness, and Seresu to destruction? Would Fai have stayed imprisoned forever in that pit in Valeria, or would Ashura still have been driven to find Fai to fulfill his own blood-drenched destiny and a sadistic sorcerer's dark plans? Had everything been foreordained, an unchangeable fate in which there were no real choices, only inevitable events and outcomes?

He feared he knew the answers to those questions. He had once thought it a mercy that Luonnotar and his sons had died. That had not changed. He was forced to admit that he still believed their deaths a mercy for them all.

"Are you going to pick a wife for me someday?" Fai asked.

Ashura started a little at that unexpected question, and his mount shied slightly when he involuntarily yanked the reins. Kendappa choked back a giggle. He ignored her, took a moment to calm the poor beast, then answered Fai honestly, "I hadn't thought about it."

There didn't seem to be any point to even considering the idea, no matter which future he chose.

"If you do, please choose someone nice," Fai requested. "Choose someone fun, too, like your wife."

"You're still very young, Fai," Ashura said. "You needn't concern yourself about such things yet."

"But if you do?" Fai persisted.

"I promise you, Fai, I won't ever select a wife for you without consulting you first." Ashura could make that particular promise with perfect honesty and sincerity. He smiled at his son, and inwardly mourned that, regardless of what events transpired in the future, he would never meet Fai's children.