a/n---Sorry this chap is kind of short, Its just to show a bit of Breaking Dawn in there, I tend not to include alot from the books in Emily s pov, just cause I dont think shed be that involved with the pack inner workings and such. Anyways.. Thanks Mediate89 for being an awesome beta and sometimes co-writer, and thanks Liljenrocks for badgering me to write lol. Also check out this new sam and emily fic called Breaking Fate by Embryakakryslover Its really really good. Also, I love each and every one of you who reviwed the lasst chapter for me and for hanging in there with me for the end of this fic thats coming closer.

Chapter 48 -- A not-so-much-like-Christmas story

I smiled down at Adam's chubby face as I balanced him on my hip. I was determined to act like this was a perfectly normal Christmas season, even though we all knew that it was far from it. I'd managed to ignore most of Sam's pack issues while I was pregnant but this wasn't something I could push away. There might not even be a pack left.

I stirred the broth around in the stock pot on top of the stove and moved slowly to the table to sit down and finish feeding the baby. I settled him in my lap and began spoon-feeding baby cereal into his eager mouth. Sam was gone; he'd been gone from us for two days now but promised he would be back tonight. He'd had a werewolf explosion happen as a result of all the vampires coming to the area for the big battle and sometimes stayed out in the woods for days at a time. It was tough, but I knew he didn't have a choice.

Adam touched the scarred side of my face lightly with his tiny fingers and giggled, making me smile. As much as I hated the situation, I knew where Bella was coming from. I would do anything I could to keep Adam safe, just like Bella was doing for Nessie. I'd gone with Sam not too long ago to see the baby. She was adorable; I could see instantly why Jacob loved her so much.

I heard a gurgle and brought my attention back to the baby in my arms. Despite all of the vampire/werewolf problems, it was Adam's first Christmas and I wanted it to be as nice as it could be, unlike Mine and Sam's last birthdays and our first Christmas together which had been thrown to the side. I wanted Adam to have a memorable first Christmas. I had everything planned out perfectly, right down to the Santa suit I was intent on having him wear.

We were going over to Charlie and Sue's tonight for Christmas Eve, but were spending Christmas Day with my family. Sam was leaving me in Makah afterward, deeming it safer for me and Adam in case the wolves didn't win the fight. I didn't even want to think about what would happen if they didn't, if Sam didn't make it back to us alive. I could tell that he was worried about it too, even if he tried not to show it, by the way he was acting. I could see the sadness in his eyes when he looked at Adam, hear the uncertainty in his voice when he held and talked to him. I knew that he was trying to come to terms with idea of his son never knowing who he was.

I moved Adam to lay over my shoulder and stood up again so I could check on the things I had cooking on the stove. The clock above the sink told me that I needed to get dressed and get Adam into his Santa suit so we could head over to Charlie'shouse. I went upstairs, carefully carrying Adam and rummaged through the drawers for the little red ensemble. After I had him looking just like a tinier version of the jolly old elf, I placed him in his bassinet and dressed myself in a pair of jeans and a dark red sweater.

I heard the back door pushed open as I was getting Adam's diaper bag ready to go. I felt the familiar tug and knew that Sam was home. I rushed downstairs, leaving Adam cooing happily in the bassinet and ran to Sam, throwing my arms around him as soon as I reached him. Sam hugged me back and gave me a kiss but pulled away a second later.

"I'm filthy, Emily." He leaned down to kiss me again. "Let me go take a quick shower and then we can cuddle all you want." He kissed me a third time and ran his fingers through my long black hair. I fought back the urge to reach up and do the same to him.

We made our way back upstairs and I followed Sam into our room. He immediately made his way over to the bassinet and looked down at Adam who was sleeping peacefully. "Emily," he groaned. "What did you put him in?"

I crossed my arms over my chest. I knew where this was going. "It's a Santa suit. It's adorable."

Sam turned to look at me with a pained expression. "It's got fur on it."

"So?"

"So boys don't wear fur. Can't you put him in something else? At least while we're out?"

I rolled my eyes and Sam made his way over to me in one long stride, stopping to give me a quick peck on the nose. "I love you, Em, but could you save it for when we have a girl?" He flashed me a quick smile and then left to head to the bathroom.

He was out a few minutes later with a towel wrapped around his waist. He grabbed a t-shit and a pair of jeans – a step-up from his usual cut-offs – out of the laundry basket and started to put them on. After he dressed and ran a hand through his hair he pulled me into a warm embrace. I breathed in his scent now mingled with soap and sighed contentedly. "I missed you," I admitted. Sam leaned down to kiss the top of my head.

"I missed you too. I'll try not to stay gone so long next time."

Adam whined suddenly from the bassinet and I started to pull away so I could tend to him but Sam bet me to it. He hurriedly made his way over to the fussing baby and lifted him into his arms. "Hey, man. I've missed you," he whispered to the baby, who was calming now. "Sorry I haven't been around much. I promise I'll make it up to you" He kissed the top of Adam's head and moved slowly around the room. "And don't worry, daddy's gonna get you out of these girl clothes too."

I made a face and finished brushing my hair. "It's his first Christmas, Sam. He should look festive."

Sam went into the nursery and flipped on the lights, still holding the baby in arm one. He dug through the dresser until he produced what he'd been looking for: a pair of little red sweatpants and a red long sleeved t-shirt. No fur trim like the Santa suit had. Sam carefully laid Adam on the changing table and all I could do was sit back and I sigh as he changed Adam's clothes. He removed the little black booties and replaced them with a pair of white socks and a pair of baby sneakers.

"There," Sam said proudly, lifting the baby up, "that's Christmas-like too."

"Fine. He can wear it but he's taking pictures in the suit later. It's too cute." I compromised, handing him Adam's heavy jacket. Come on, we needed to get going.

We drove to Forks, talking softly to each other the entire way about Adam, life… and the impending vampire battle. Sam had everything planned out for the worst-case scenario, or the best. By the time we made it to Charlie's house, the rest of the pack was already there along with Bella, Edward, and Nessie. I got Adam out of the truck, letting Sam carry the rest of the stuff and followed him into the house where we were greeted warmly by everyone. I passed Adam back to Sam and went to help Aunt Sue with getting everything ready. I couldn't help but laugh when I heard the pack singing carols. They were terrible.

We hung around until late that night, laughing and sharing stories about our past Christmases. No one really said anything about this possibly being the last one where we were all here together. I knew Bella wanted this to be exactly what I did-- Christmas for Renesmee, even if it was a bad timing for it, just like I wanted it for Adam.

I yawned sleepily as we pulled into our driveway. I was tired, but there was no way I was going to bed yet. "Are you… staying home tonight?" I asked Sam. Sam smiled and nodded.

"Yep, I'm all yours. We only have a few out running patrols since everyone wanted to be home for Christmas, but that's about all we need right now. The Cullens' friends are staying off the land well enough. They'll howl if they need anything."

Sam carried the carseat inside for me and sat it on the coffee table. Little Adam had fallen asleep hours ago. "I'm leaving his presents in the truck for tonight," I said as I kicked off my shoes. I didn't feel like lugging them inside. Even though presents were decided against for us, the pack and everyone else it seemed thought Adam just had to have something. Needless to say, the back seat was filled with noise-making objects.

Sam carried Adam into our room instead of the nursery and laid him in the bassinet beside our bed. He must have wanted him near tonight. I watched as he took off the baby's Santa hat and little shoes and covered him with a blanket. "I miss him," Sam murmured. "I hate being away from him."

I walked up behind Sam and wrapped my arms around him. "He misses you too. He fusses and cries every time you leave for longer than a couple of hours." Even in the dim lighting I could see the pain in Sam's eyes when I said that.

"I can't help it," he said more to himself than to me. "I've got to be out there when there's this big of a threat. I can't let the pack fight blindly without a leader."

"I know, Sam. And even if you weren't Alpha I know you'd be out there anyway trying to protect us, and that's what I love about you." I rested my head against his arm and we stared down at our sleeping son. He was looking more and more like Sam every day.

Sam sat on the edge of the bed and pulled me down beside him. "You tired?" He asked quietly. I shook my head and despite running around outside for two days, Sam didn't seem to want to waste the night sleeping either. We settled back against the pillows and I snuggled against Sam's warm chest. "I love you," he whispered into my ear.

"I love you too," I mumbled. The heat radiating off of Sam's body, his comforting scent and his deep, even breathing had me feeling sleepy fast and my attempt at staying awake failed before the hour was up.

Sam shook me awake the next morning and I reluctantly packed my things to go to Makah. Sam held onto Adam all morning until he was forced to put him in his carseat so we could get on the road. The two-hour drive wasn't bad, and Adam seemed to be enjoying it by the way he was giggling and cooing in the backseat. It was arriving at our destination that was the hard part.

We went inside and were greeted warmly by my parents and grandparents. No sooner had I unwrapped Adam from his bundle of blankets the ladies were trying to pry him out of my arms. Adam started fussing from all of the attention and didn't start to relax until Sam insisted on taking him. He didn't let him go while we ate dinner or even when we opened the presents from my family and I tried not to remind myself that it was because he was trying to get every moment in with his son in case he never saw him again.

It was starting to get dark out and I knew that Sam had to leave soon. I tried to keep my composure as he led me into the bedroom to say goodbye. He handed me a sleeping Adam and pulled me into a kiss, soft and sweet. The perfect goodbye kiss. I tried to keep my tears at bay but there was no stopping them as he pulled away.

"I love you, Emily." He kept his voice low. "I don't want to scare you but I honestly don't know how this is going to turn out, and if something happens to me I want you to take care of Adam. Let him know that I love him and that I never would have left him if I'd had a choice." He reached out to run his hand through Adam's soft black hair.

I nodded silently and laid Adam down on the bed so he could rest comfortably.

When I turned to face Sam again, he lifted my chin so I was looking into his eyes. "You'll be fine Emily, and try not to worry too much. I won't be able to concentrate if I know you're upset."

I nodded again, not trusting my voice. Sam sighed and wrapped his arms around me. "I love you, Emily. If everything goes well, we'll all be back before you know it. You should be preparing yourself to start looking after six new wolves." He smiled at me and ran his thumb across my scarred cheek.

"I love you, Sam."

Sam took hold of my hand and gently tugged me toward the bedroom door. "Come on, walk me out."