CHAPTER 48
Marlene consoled Rebecca holding her as she began to come down from the shock she was feeling, "It's ok to cry Rebecca," Marlene assured her, "I just can't believe this, this happening," She pulled Rebecca's face back to look in her eyes, "Does he have family?" She asked. "I know both of his parents are in England and both were in bad health he was an only child," Rebecca grimaced answering, "Did you meet them?" She inquired further. "No never he went home last Christmas but didn't offer much about them when he returned," She voiced thinking back to the time they were together, "Will you try to let them know?" Marlene was curious. "I don't think so," She shrugged, "I mean I didn't meet them he didn't talk about them much at all and I don't know with the health he said they were in," She shook her head once again in disbelief, "Shh, its going to be ok," Marlene comforted her again rubbing the side of Rebecca's face with her hand. "I love you," She then moved her hand to Rebecca's abdomen touching it softly. "I'm tired and I'm not hungry would you mind if I go lay down for awhile?" I really need some alone time," She stood up from the sofa and slowly walked to the bedroom falling onto the bed in grief she clutched her abdomen and sobbed loudly the pain she felt at losing someone she was once close with was devastating. Marlene walked outside and sat out on the back porch she hung her head in sorrow for Rebecca she quickly phoned Grace, "Can we talk?" She sternly asked, "Yes, I'll put some tea on come on over," She went in and checked on Rebecca and then left her to grieve.
Marlene hurried up the stairs and into Grace's kitchen she had placed the teapot and cups on a tray, "You seemed upset, is everything alright with Rebecca?" She curiously asked. "Yes and no," Marlene worded they took the tray out to the porch and sat down, "Rebecca is feeling fine but we've had a rough patch," Marlene started to say, "Oh, well I hope its something that can be worked out," She poured Marlene's tea as she spoke. "Grace, I think Rebecca is going to keep the baby," She quietly inserted, "Its her decision," Grace appeared relieved, "Yes and Eric is definitely the father, did you know about this?" She probed for an answer. "No," She sighed realizing this may cause a rift between the two of them, "I did not, Rebecca didn't say a word and David certainly wouldn't, patient privacy," She replied. Marlene thought for a moment, "I wasn't sure I could deal with her being pregnant, she loves me and came here to be with me and sleeps with a man from her past," Marlene complained in a ramble. "And are you holding that against her?" Grace was quick to respond, Marlene eyed her, "I shouldn't, I denied her too many times, I can't totally blame her, I'm as much at fault and if I'm being realistic with myself he walked in at a time she was very vulnerable," She admitted. "What decision have you made?" Grace asked, Marlene managed a grin, "I've asked her to marry me Grace," There was a second of silence between them she grasped Marlene in a tight hug, "I'm so happy for you she did say yes?" Grace's question hung in the air, "She did," Marlene seemed sad to her. "So she really has decided to keep the baby?" Grace questioned again in uncertainty, "We discussed it in lenght earlier," Marlene quietly answered.
"Marlene you seem unsure, what's going on?" She interjected, "Rebecca and I talked and we both agreed that Eric should know," She took in a deep breath. "She had been trying to reach him and she called the magazine he works for only to find out that Eric was killed by a hit and run driver in Milan while he was on assignment," She explained. "Oh my god, Rebecca must be devastated," Grace, remarked looking at Marlene with sadness "And that's why I'm here she needs some alone time," They finished their tea. "I should go and check on her if she awakes she'll wonder where I am," Marlene winced walking to the door, "One other thing," She began again, "And what's that?" Grace quizzed, "Rebecca and I have discussed where we would like to marry and we were wondering if you would mind if we married here?" Grace's sad face turned to a grin, "David and I would be honored," She embraced her. Marlene pulled back, "Will you stand up for us?" She inquired with a grin, "Certainly, you're my best friend Marlene and I feel I've found a real friend in Rebecca as well," She spoke with excitement, "So I guess we will need to make arrangements but first I need to help Rebecca get past this devastation," She advised. "Well when you come back to work in a few days we will talk, Rebecca also needs care for her health and with a baby," She arched her brow speaking, "My god we are going to be parents," She smiled thinking, "Yes and sooner than you thought but I have to ask Marlene," Grace paused, "You didn't want children with Mark," Marlene stopped her, "I didn't love Mark, I didn't demand Rebecca have this child she had the option but I love her and I want this for us," She pled. "You will be a good parent Marlene, I have no doubt," She saw her out.
Rebecca sat curled up on the sofa, "Hey where have you been?" She yawned in question as Marlene closed the door, "Grace's, I thought you could use the rest and the alone time," She answered. Rebecca groaned, "It still doesn't help the pain, I just feel awful the last time I saw him, I hurt him badly knowing he was in love with me," She rehearsed, "Rebecca you can't beat yourself up over this, I know he meant something to you after all he's the father of this child," She spoke firmly. "I know Marlene but I feel bad and," She stared deeply into her eyes, "Could you please just hold me?" She begged in a question. Marlene took Rebecca in her arms, "I love you Rebecca and more than you'll ever know, I, don't ever want to live without you," She ran her fingers through her hair, "Marlene, I hope that your not angry with me, I mean I caused this," She voiced leaning her head against her chest. "We are going to be parents, once our child is born I can adopt and truly become his or her mother," She managed to get a grin from Rebecca, "You are in a very delicate situation Rebecca, you can't afford to be stressed or not get the rest you need to build your strength back up, we don't want you back in the hospital," Marlene brushed her index finger against Rebecca's chin. "I have an appointment with a Dr. Raines on Monday, David sat it up," She spoke becoming serious, "You need to make sure the baby is alright, there will be tests to determine that the medications you were on didn't harm the fetus," She spoke with an informative tone. "Yes, I know," She caressed Marlene's face in speaking. "And you need to eat not only to keep your strength up but you're eating for two now," Marlene picked trying to lift Rebecca's damaged spirits.
They sat to the table together, Marlene picked up her drinking glass, sipping her water and swallowing, "I love you," She mentioned, Rebecca toyed with her food, "I love you too," She whispered, "Finish up the rest of your food Rebecca," She urged her she did, Marlene cleared the table doing the dishes, Rebecca helped they stood at the sink looking out of the window, "It's a beautiful evening out why don't we put on our sweaters and take a walk, I could use it," Rebecca calmly stated. "Its close to dark Rebecca, just a short one, I don't want you in the night air," She remarked they slipped on their sweaters and headed down the sandy path to the shoreline. Rebecca took Marlene by the hand, "Do you know how often I've dreamed of a walk like this?" She began, Marlene smiled, "One of the things I missed the most about us was our walks and horseback rides," She further added, "Me too," Marlene answered. "I miss the alone time we shared," She giggled, Rebecca wheeled her around, "I know but I worked all the time and we lost that in the shuffle of things," She pointed out rationally, "My visit to New York did yield something for me," She spoke shifting an eye towards Marlene as they continued to walk, "And what was that?" She questioned. "The shop on Stanton Street is available and I rented it," She felt her throat tighten as she spoke. "Hmmm," Marlene groaned, "I think its great," She smiled answering, "You do, you mean it?" Rebecca probed with a wide grinned clutching her closely her lips met hers in a tender kiss, "More than anything I love you Rebecca and I know you want to work, I would never ask you to stop doing what you love, I don't want to go back to Germany," She hesitated briefly, "You returning there, to LCL," She lowered her head, "Just isn't in the cards for me," She braved the words speaking them.
Rebecca moved her face closer to Marlene's, "And when I told you I would make sacrifices to be with you that's exactly what I meant, yes there will be times I will need to return home and do things at LCL, its my business Marlene the shop on Stanton Street gives me the chance to prove myself, solo, as an individual who can make it on her own," She reflected. "Don't forget we're having a baby," Marlene teased embracing her, Rebecca felt sadness she looked at the last rays of the sun creeping down over the ocean, "Today is for Eric," She grimaced looking down to her belly, "I can agree, I know that deep down he meant something to you, a wonderful man who fulfilled the lost need you had," Marlene surmised quietly. Rebecca sighed deeply, "What a loss, a loss some other woman could've shared his kindness and aspirations but not me," She added, "Let's go back to the cottage," They walked back."The upstairs," Marlene pointed and then continued, "Will that be your office?" Rebecca grinned, "Yes, I plan to design and sew there," They moved to the couch sitting down, "I intend to hire a manager, designer and seamstress for the Stanton Street store, I'll draft the designs have the new designer tweak them and go from there, a small operation but a fantastic one," She giggled tickling Marlene. "I know your intentions for Stanton Street are good," Marlene spoke and then looked down to the floor, "Hey, I know your worried about LCL, I've spoken to Elisabeth about it and she thinks it's a marvelous idea, Tristan too, they just want me to be happy," She clutched Marlene's face. "So this won't be broad scaled?" She dug for an answer, "No, a simple dress shop catering to the needs of those who want top of the line designs at an affordable price," She made her feel more at ease. "What about LCL?" She asked, "As I said there will be times that I will need to attend to things there, meetings, fashion days," She smiled, "But I'm not going to live there this is where I want to be with you, you have a career now and its time to let you live your dreams, no arguments," She smiled kissing her.
"I worry that you won't be happy settling here," She began to speak in a realistic tone, "Nonsense, I love you and I want to be with you no matter what and if it means sacrificing then, then," She stood up from the sofa and walked to the window. "What is it Rebecca?" Marlene had an air of concern, "I can't help but think about how deeply I hurt you in the past, my stupidity when it came to our personal lives, the lies I told, I just lost it and when you left it was a wakeup call, I let you get away, I didn't fight hard enough but deep down, in the pit of my stomach, I knew that you needed a release, all you went through with Hagen, the rape, Tristan," She stammered. Marlene moved closely behind her, "Shh, that's all over with, yes its true, I didn't make the best choices and I should've given you another chance," She turned her around her finger lifting her chin, "But I love you and its all ok Rebecca, we have to move past all these worries and doubts a fresh start with nothing holding us back just you and I," Her smile warmed Rebecca's heart. "I know I was never good at keeping promises but I promise you that I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy," She reached forward touching her lips to hers, "You already have just by saying you'll marry me," They embraced. "Marlene," Rebecca stared swallowing hard, "Yes Rebecca," She whispered her lips slightly trembled, "Make love to me," Her hand caressed her throat she took her hand leading her to the bed, "Are you sure?" She lightly questioned as she began to unbutton her shirt, "I'm sure," Rebecca let her finish unbuttoning her shirt exposing the goose bumps that covered her skin. "My god you drive me insane," Marlene quirked her fingertips caused Rebecca's skin to flinch as she touched her with tenderness. Marlene gazed at her flesh unzipping her pants and slipping them off of her.
Rebecca lay on the bed spreading her legs and accepting the touch of Marlene's tongue inside her void she moaned and groaned in unhindered passion her hands rifling through Marlene's hair as she gasped for air, "Please don't stop," She begged loudly. Marlene tightened her grip on Rebecca's hips driving her tongue even further inside of a wanting Rebecca she became rigid as she jerked and twitched in a flurry of orgasms. Rebecca quickly rolled on top of Marlene kissing her wildly and with erotic pleasure. "You are so sexy Marlene," Rebecca teased seriously nibbling her lips her hands caressing her sides, her fingers entering her crevice, "Rebecca," Marlene panted catching her breath, "What," She whispered softly, "I want you inside of me," She clutched her shoulders pushing Rebecca down to her mound Rebecca's tongue traced the outline of her void piercing it with steady strokes until Marlene winced in climaxes uttering in pleas of sexual release. Rebecca soon fell asleep from exhaustion Marlene laid there caressing the side of her arm with her fingertips holding her closely. "I love you so much you mean everything to me," She voiced calmly kissing the top of Rebecca's head she could feel her breath heave in and out of her chest. "There is so much for us," She whispered in continuance falling asleep still cradling Rebecca in her arms.
Marlene paced in the waiting room of Dr. Raines's office when she heard the creak of the door opening she turned to see Rebecca standing there, "Is everything ok?" She rushed to her side, "Well I'm definitely pregnant she did some blood work and schedule some tests for tomorrow but given the situation I was in things just couldn't be helped," Rebecca had a worried look, "I'm due around the end of April," She muttered as they walked out. "Are the tests at the hospital?" Marlene asked helping her in the car, "They are, nine o'clock," She stated, "Ok we will just hope for the best, will Dr. Raines be doing those tests?" She asked curiously, "I don't know she just told me to report to the front desk and they will take me in," She repeated herself, Marlene drove her back to the cottage. "What if things aren't good?" Marlene asked with an air of concern, Rebecca shrugged her shoulders a streak of fear crossed her face, "I don't know Marlene, I just," She paused momentarily, "If the child is deformed or," She shook her head and then looked up to Marlene, "Then it wouldn't be fair to keep it, I can't see putting a child through unnecessary crisis," She wept as she spoke those words, Marlene nodded. "I understand Rebecca it wouldn't be fair but your timeframe for an abortion is very short and a quick decision would have to be made," She sighed in an answer. "I'm tired, I think I'll shower and turn in early," She kissed Marlene sweetly on the lips leaving her to think about the delicate situation they found themselves in.
Grace met Marlene in the waiting room of the women's wing of the hospital, "Are you alright?" She rubbed the side of her arm, "I will be when I hear something," She attempted to smile but found it difficult, "Why don't we get some coffee," Grace ordered taking her hand, "I should wait," Grace smiled, "It will be awhile, come," Marlene followed they found a seat at a table close to the door of the cafeteria. "Rebecca, what are her feelings?" Grace probed, "We talked last night about it and I agree with Rebecca, if the child is not normal she won't keep it," Grace closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, "That's a big step but understandable," She reflected embracing Marlene, "I want what's best for her, really Grace," She implored staring at the last of the coffee in her cup, "I want to get back upstairs," She quickly finished her coffee leaving Grace at the table. Marlene paced in the elevator as the doors opened she looked around the waiting room but didn't see Rebecca she took as seat thinking of how Rebecca must be feeling. "Marlene," She was startled from her thoughts by a smiling Rebecca she clutched her shoulder and then slipped on her jacket, "I'm hungry," She announced not offering much to a quiet Marlene, "What did the tests say?" Marlene asked as the elevator doors closed leaving them alone, "I'm fine and the baby is fine," She groaned in relief, Marlene took her in her arms, "Thank god," She held her tight. "I will be monitored closely and there will be other tests so keeping our fingers crossed," She answered laying her head on Marlene's chest, "I think we should marry soon," Rebecca gave her a shake of the head they kissed when the dinging of the elevator doors sounded and opened startling them.
