A/N: Yay, the review issue is fixed and I was able to see everyone's reviews! So if you were holding out reviewing last chapter because of the problem, you no longer need to worry about that. Also, we are so close to 500 reviews, which is really, really exciting!

I also want to welcome pinkprincess06 to the club and say thank you for reviewing several of my stories!


Ever notice how time seems to fly when a dreaded event is approaching? That's exactly how Alec felt the last few weeks of the Spring semester.

That Saturday morning in May dawned bright and sunny. An occasional wispy white cloud passed overhead, but otherwise the sky was brilliant blue. The flowering trees were doing their job, making everything pretty, and everyone sneezy. Everyone was happy, excited about the warm weather and summer plans and their futures.

Everyone except Alec. He found himself sitting in an uncomfortable folding chair at the far end of the gymnasium he'd come to know so well, feeling as gloomy as if it were pouring down rain in the dead of winter. He knew he shouldn't. He knew today was a special day. But he just couldn't shake the sadness that had settled on him since he'd taken his last final of the year.

Today was Magnus's and Cammie's graduation day. Today marked the day they would officially enter their adult lives and leave their schooling behind. Today was their last ever day of college. Today was the end of the life Alec had grown to love.

And he wasn't coping very well.

He looked up when he realized someone was trying to move past him down the row of seats. Momma H, Will, and Jem were the newcomers. They each smiled at him as they passed, Momma H softly patting his shoulder. He returned their smiles, but didn't engage in their conversation. He was too wrapped up in his own mind to sort out their words.

Alec stared ahead, eyes unfocused and unseeing, and he was, therefore, surprised when Cammie's face suddenly came into view.

"What's your problem, Lightwood?" she said conversationally.

"My problem?" he said, sounding kind of dazed.

"Yeah, your problem. The sky is blue, birds are singing, your favorite people are graduating…"

Alec lifted one side of his mouth in a wry grin. "I think you just nailed it."

She slid down in the seat in front of him and lowered her voice. For the first time today she sounded annoyed. "Listen to me, Alec. I know you are upset about us graduating. I know you are worried about what's going to happen with you and Magnus in the future, but today is not about you." She pointed behind her to where Magnus was standing, chatting with a group of seniors Alec didn't know. "Today is about him. He needs you…you know, to not be a selfish prick."

That's Cammie. Calling it like she sees it since the day he met her. "I'm not trying to be a selfish prick. I just…know what's coming."

"Really?" She cocked her head to the side like an interested dog. "I was under the impression that you two were waiting until draft day to figure out what was going on. Didn't know you had some insight that the rest of us don't have."

Alec rolled his eyes. "I don't have any insight. I just…know the odds."

"I thought you were being optimistic."

"I was, but…I have to be realistic sometime."

He winced when she smacked him upside the head. "You're not being realistic. You're making assumptions without the facts. Well, here's some facts for you. That man loves you. He wants to be with you. He's trying to stay positive while his life is in limbo. He's been through more than his fair share of hardships, and he's come out on top. He's graduating from college, an accomplishment that many people in his situation, that come from his background, never get to do. The least you could do is be supportive, instead of moping around like your dog just died."

Alec looked away, because he couldn't maintain eye contact and feel the shame she'd made him feel at the same time. She was absolutely right. Today was not about him or his fears or worries. Today was a day to celebrate Magnus and everything he'd accomplished so far. He felt horrible for the way he'd been behaving.

"Go talk to him." Cammie gave him a look that left no room for questions.

He lifted his lip in a half-smile, and patted her arm as he stood. He started up the aisle toward Magnus. When Magnus saw him approaching, he leaned over and said something to his friends, then gave them a little wave and met Alec halfway down the aisle.

"Hey."

"Hey," Alec replied. He didn't know what he was going to say, hadn't thought that far ahead. "Can…can we talk?"

Magnus raised a questioning eyebrow, then gestured with one hand, and placed the other on the small of Alec's back. Alec led him through the big, green double doors of the gymnasium. They closed behind Magnus with a metallic clang.

Magnus leaned against the cool concrete, drawing one leg up and propping his foot against the wall, looking all kinds of casual. Alec wondered how casual, how calm and collected he really was. "What's up?"

"I…I just…I wanted to say…I'm sorry," Alec said to his shoes. He couldn't quite make himself look Magnus in the eye.

"For what?" Magnus's voice sounded curious, like he really didn't know what a basket case Alec was inside right now. Or maybe he just wanted to hear him say it. To make him confess to what a shitty boyfriend he was being today.

"For being so moody." He forced himself to look at Magnus now. "For not being as happy as I should be today. For not being there for you…" His voice trailed off. The look in Magnus's eyes made him want to clarify what he'd said. "The thing is, Magnus, I am happy for you. I'm so proud of what you've accomplished. And I love you so much. I'm just…" He dropped his eyes to the floor again, unable to finish his sentence.

"Just…?" Magnus prompted. He really was going to make him say it.

"I don't want to lose you. And the closer we get to the draft… It just feels like that's it. Like we are counting down the days to the end of…us."

Magnus took his hands and loosely shook them. Alec knew he wanted him to look at him, and it took a monumental effort to do it. He felt the sting of tears in his eyes.

"Do you really think I'm not just as scared as you are? I've spent my whole life dreaming about playing in the NBA. I didn't know the exact date like we do now, but I've been counting down to June 23, 2016 for as long as I can remember. And now I have to wonder what price I'm going to pay to get there."

He pushed himself off the wall and paced a little. "I don't want to lose you either, Alec. I love you, and I want us to be together. I just -"

"I'm coming with you," Alec interjected, cutting him off in mid-sentence.

Magnus gaped at him, opening and closing his mouth like a fish. It would be comical if the subject wasn't so serious. He seemed to be searching for the right words, or maybe trying to remember how to form them. What he settled on was, "Wh-what?"

"I said I'm coming with you," Alec said with more confidence. He hadn't made that decision until that very moment, though he'd thought about it plenty in the last few weeks. He was suddenly sure that was the right thing for him to do, the only way to keep them together.

"No way," Magnus said, shaking his head. "You can't. Your whole life is here." They were standing barely a foot apart, his eyes searching Alec's like he really couldn't believe his ears.

Alec took his hands again and pulled one up to his mouth, placing a tender kiss on his knuckles. "My life…is with you."

Magnus still wasn't convinced. "What about your family? School? Cheerleading?"

"My family will be fine. Hell, Jace is leaving to play soccer at Wake Forest. Izzy's moving to Paris to study something or other to do with fashion. I have no idea, honestly. Everyone's being scattered on the wind anyway, so my leaving won't make any difference."

"No, Alec, that's all the more reason for you to stay. Do you really think your parents can handle all three of you leaving at the same time?"

"Yes, I do. Look, they've done their job. They raised us. We're adults now and it's time for us to make our own decisions, to figure out what's best for us. Besides," he added with a sheepish grin, "my dad's a multi-millionaire. You are about to be a multi-millionaire. And in September when I turn twenty-one, I'll be a multi-millionaire. I think we can find a way to get together with my parents if we really want to."

"Okay. What about school? There aren't very many Sports Medicine programs in the US. I won't be the reason you give up your dreams so I can follow mine." Magnus looked every bit as stubborn as Alec knew he could be. Was it wrong that he found that sexy?

"I did some research. There are four other cities besides Brooklyn with a pro basketball team and a college with a Sports Med program. If we don't go to one of those, I'll just change my major to Physical Therapy. There are PT schools all over the place." He shrugged like this was no big deal, no sacrifice at all on his part.

"Hell, no! If you don't get the Sports Med degree, you won't ever get hired by the Knicks. How is that fair to you? And if you transfer, you won't get to cheer. What about your scholarship?"

Alec sighed exasperatedly. "First of all, my parents pay for my schooling. I didn't take the scholarship money, so that means nothing. Second, do you really think I give a fuck about cheering if you and Cammie aren't there? You two are what made it fun these last two years. Without you, it means nothing to me."

"Alec -"

The door rattled next to them and a sandy-haired head poked itself into the hall. "Magnus. There you are. They're ready for us to line up now," the head said. Alec had no idea who this guy was.

Magnus glanced in his direction. "Thanks, Tim. Be right there."

Now that their argument had quieted, Alec could hear music that hadn't been playing when they came into the hall. Tim gave Magnus a nod and disappeared back through the door, which clanged again as it closed. Magnus turned back to Alec.

"I have to go," he said, looking for all the world like that was the last thing he wanted to do right now. "Can we talk about this more later?"

Alec looked away. "Whatever," he mumbled. He knew he was being difficult, but everything Magnus had said to him hurt so much.

Magnus caught his hands, tugging them to get Alec to look at him. When their eyes met, Alec could see that Magnus was hurting, too, and suddenly felt like a total ass. "Alec. Baby, I'm not rejecting you. The selfish part of me is screaming at me to shut the fuck up and let you come with me. I'm just scared that would be a mistake, and you'd end up hating me for it down the road."

"What? I could never hate you, Magnus. I love you. Don't you know that?"

The next moment he was buried in Magnus's arms, snug against his chest, breathing him in. Magnus held him tightly, and Alec could just make out his words. "I love you, too. God, I love you so much."

When Magnus finally released him, he said, "I gotta go. I'm sorry. We'll talk later, okay?"

Alec nodded and Magnus kissed him on the lips, then on his forehead before disappearing back into the gymnasium. Alec took a few moments to get himself under control. When he opened the heavy door and started back toward his seat, the band started playing. Alec recognized the brassy notes of 'Pomp and Circumstance' as he found the row where Will and the others were seated. A new someone had joined their group in his absence. Austin looked up and smiled at him as he took his seat.

The smile faded quickly. "What's wrong?" he hissed just loud enough to be heard over the music.

Alec suddenly found himself fighting tears again. He picked at his cuticle as he said, "My boyfriend doesn't want me to go with him if he leaves New York."

"What?" Will said, his voice carrying and causing the people around them to stare. He leaned over, lowering his voice, as the first of the graduates entered the gym. "He actually said that to you?"

"Basically. Yeah."

Magnus and Cammie entered. Since his last name started with Ba- and hers with Be-, they were only separated by a few people. They grinned when they saw Alec, Will, and the others, and both waved. They all waved back, Austin shouting a little 'whoop' for Cammie.

Will sat back in his seat. "I'll kill him. I'm gonna beat his fucking ass."

That got Jem's attention, and then Momma H leaned over and told them all to be quiet. Alec dropped his voice and said, "Don't, Will. If he doesn't want me, he doesn't want me." He choked on those words, barely able to get them out.

"He wants you," Austin assured him.

Will nodded. "He does. I don't know what he's thinking…"

Another loud shhh from Momma H effectively ended the conversation.

Alec tuned out the majority of the ceremony. He wasn't in the mood to listen to speeches about accomplishment and having their whole lives ahead of them and what wondrous things the world had in store for the graduates. Those were just reminders that on June 23rd, life as he knew it would end. Yes, he was vaguely aware that his thoughts were nothing more than a self-indulgent pity-party, but he couldn't help it. Magnus said he wanted him to stay in Brooklyn. How else was he supposed to feel?

He did tune in when they started calling the graduates names. At least, for the first part of the alphabet. The part that involved his boyfriend and a woman he thought of as a sister. After that, he zoned out again, crawling into his own mind and wallowing in his misery. Cammie would be pissed at him for not putting on a happy face, but at that moment, he just couldn't do it.

After the ceremony, there was much mingling and congratulating and happy, excited, and sometimes squealing people. Alec was quiet and reserved and let everyone else do the talking. He didn't have much to contribute, anyway. Graduation had come and gone, and there was one less milestone marker between him and whatever June 23rd held in store. He was really beginning to hate that date.

The group apparently decided to go out for dinner. Alec wondered when that conversation took place. He continued his silence, and barely even noticed where they went, how they got there, or what he ate. At some point during, or maybe it was after, dinner, Magnus excused himself to go to the restroom. Cammie slid into his seat.

"I thought you were going to be happy for us," she hissed, looking irritated.

"That was before he told me I can't go with him," Alec whispered back.

"What?" Cammie's eyes were very round with surprise. "He said that?"

Alec nodded, and dropped his eyes. He just couldn't stand the pitying look people gave him when he told them that. That was almost worse than hearing it in the first place.

Alec checked out of the conversation again. He didn't know if Cammie said anything else to him before she went back to her seat. He felt when Magnus sat down next to him again, though.

"Are you okay?" Magnus breathed into his ear. Alec simply nodded, not wanting to get into another argument at the restaurant. They'd have to wait until they got home for that. Or maybe it wasn't worth fighting over. If Magnus didn't want him to go…

Sometime later, Alec found himself at a club, wondering how he'd gotten there. Why didn't he just go home? Say he wasn't feeling well and just leave? Oh, right, because today wasn't about him.

He quietly watched as Magnus, Cammie, Austin, Will, and Jem threw back some shots. He had no idea what they were drinking, just that they were and he was underage and couldn't. Self-medicating appealed to him at the moment, though. When Magnus ordered some kind of fruity cocktail thing, he took the glass from him and downed it in one gulp.

Magnus stared at him, his eyes wide with surprise, but he didn't say anything. "Order another one," Alec demanded, and Magnus did as he was told. Alec knew they could all get in trouble if he was discovered drinking in a club while underage, but he couldn't seem to muster up the ability to give a shit just then. Magnus returned with the drink, and Alec tossed it down his throat just as he had the previous one.

He was already feeling the effects of the alcohol. Two cocktails taken like shots? Yeah, his spirits were starting to lift a little, his whole body feeling warm and fuzzy. He noticed Will and Cammie having a rather animated conversation with Magnus, who kept throwing furtive glances in his direction. They were out of earshot so he couldn't tell what they were saying.

"You feeling okay?" Austin said, and he turned away from Magnus's glances.

"Am now," Alec said with a grin. "Don't tell anyone, but I'm a little buzzed."

Austin laughed. "I saw you stealing Magnus's drinks." He tossed his chin in the direction of their significant others. "What do you suppose is going on over there?"

Alec shrugged. "No idea."

At that moment, Magnus broke away from Cammie and Will and marched over to Alec and Austin. That was the only fitting description to the way he moved. He looked irritated, maybe exasperated, as he grabbed Alec's arm and, again, marched him passed Austin's stunned face, out of the club and around the corner into a dimly lit alleyway.

"What the hell is going on?" Magnus demanded.

Alec blinked at him. His fuzzy brain was struggling to keep up while trying to figure out why his boyfriend was angry. "What?"

"I was just read the riot act by Will and Cammie for telling you you can't come with me. What. The. Fuck?"

Alec sobered some with that statement. "Oh. Is that what they were doing?"

"Yeah. Mind telling me why they think I don't want you to come with me?" Magnus sounded seriously pissed off.

Alec slumped against the cool brick of the alley wall. "That's what you said…" he said miserably.

Magnus grabbed his upper arms and shoved him against the wall. It hurt a little, but Alec was much more aware of the dangerous look in Magnus's eyes, and the sweet scent of his breath. "That's not what I said." He shook Alec a little, then abruptly released him. He ran one hand through his hair, the other on his hip as he started to pace. "Shit." He looked at Alec. "Is that really what I said?"

Between the alcohol and Alec's self-pity, he was struggling to remember Magnus's exact words. He finally gave up and said, "That's what I heard."

Magnus gripped his arms again, more gently this time, and pushed him against the wall with his body. "That's not what I meant. That's not how I wanted it to sound. I love you, Alec. I want you with me. I hope like hell I get drafted to one of the New York teams, or even a team that's in the same city as a school with a Sports Med program. I really mean that."

"Then why did you say…?"

"I'm trying not to be selfish here, Alec. Think about it. What happens in five years if we don't make it? If we break up? You've given up your dream to follow me, and you'll have nothing to show for it. It'll just be one more reason for you to hate me."

His eyes held a plea for understanding, but Alec couldn't meet them. He said in a soft whisper, "You don't think we'll make it?"

Magnus cursed and pushed away again. "That's not what I meant. I don't know what the future holds for us, Alec. But there are a lot of couples, couples who love each other just as much as we do, that don't make it. Hell, look at the divorce rate in this country. Things happen. Life happens. People change, and sometimes they grow apart. Sometimes there's nothing you can do to stop it."

Alec wondered if he was thinking about his mom and stepdad when he said that. Alec was thinking about his own parents. "Sometime people stay together forever, though."

Magnus's expression softened. "Sometimes they do, and I hope like hell we are in that group. But I'm not willing to risk your future and happiness for hope. As long as you get your degree and have a shot at your dream job, I'm happy. I will find a way to survive without you for two years if that's what it takes. It'll suck and I'll hate it, but I'm willing to make that sacrifice for you."

"So…you're not trying to get rid of me?" Alec truly hated how pathetic he sounded just then, but he needed to know.

Magnus scooped him into his arms, kissing his cheek, his hair, his ear. "God no! I'd wait forever for you."

Alec breathed out a sigh of relief, followed shortly by a laugh, and then the tears fell. Surely he can be forgiven for his moment of weakness. Surely his doubts and worry were understandable. He cried until the tears ran out, and Magnus held him through it all. He felt so much better afterward.

"I really needed to hear that," he said, somewhat embarrassed for the way he'd been acting.

Magnus smiled warmly at him, and brushed a lock of hair out of his face. "Maybe I was wrong in insisting that we wait until after the draft to talk about this. I think I made it worse, but that wasn't my intention. I just wanted to be with you without the pressure and stress of dealing with the future, especially since we don't know what it holds. But I never meant for you to think I didn't want you, or didn't want to be with you. Hell." He chuckled. "I've even thought about not signing a contract and playing in the D-League if they'd let me play here in New York, just so I could be with you."

"Like hell you're going to play in the fucking D-League! That's insane! You're gonna be a star, an NBA All-star. I won't let you trade that to stay in New Fucking York with me!"

Magnus smirked. "See? That's exactly how I feel about you. We have to go where our careers take us. We'll have plenty of time to be together. I promise."

They held each other for a long time, right there in the alleyway. Alec accepted what Magnus was saying. It was the same thing Cammie had said to him weeks ago. He knew they were right, but that didn't make it any easier to think about two long, lonely years without Magnus.

He had a little under two months to hope and pray and wish for the future. For Magnus to get to stay somewhere in New York. For him to go to one of the cities where a Sports Med program existed. Or for him to at least stay on the East Coast where he'd play in and around New York more often.

So many questions. So few answers.