A/N: 50 CHAPTERS OH MY GOD. WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT THAT WE'D BE HERE? Certainly not me , that's for sure. Well , you've heard my speech before so I'm not going to bore you again. Just know that I'm grateful for each and every one of you! Also , thank you to my Meredith grey. Lou , I love you. Thank you for encouraging me to do this!
(And yes , I'm all better now! Thanks for the concern.)
Anyway , here we go. Enjoy!
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7 May 2016
He was watching her. He hadn't seen her in so long so being able to watch her felt like a privilege.
He didn't even bother to look away when she looked at him. He just kept staring.
They made eye contact a few times ; when she took a sip of her drink or when she would laugh and her eyes would travel his away or when she would look at him just to make sure that he was still looking at her.
He wanted to go over. He wanted to say hi. To explain himself. To apologize. But he couldn't.
Because one , she was surrounded by everyone they knew and two , he didn't deserve forgiveness.
Owen took a sip of his drink and looked around. The bar was crowded. Everyone wanted to see the great Cristina Yang in person. Everyone wanted to marvel at her and try and soak up some of her success. Doctors , nurses , residents , they were all there for the same reason. And so was he. He watched an intern walk up to her and introduce himself. He could tell the guy was nervous but Cristina was patient and she waited until he was done and then thanked him for whatever he had said to her and then she turned back to her friends when he walked away. It surprised him how much she had changed. A few years ago , that intern would've been shot down the moment he said hi. Maybe he didn't know her anymore. And the thought of that crushed him.
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Cristina thanked the intern and then when he walked away , she turned back to her friends.
"Wow , aren't we popular these days." Callie observed.
"Oh , I was always popular." She shrugged.
"You sure it has nothing to do with that Harper Avery?" Arizona questioned.
"Well ... it may play a tiny part in my new found popularity."
"Uh huh."
Everyone laughed and Cristina looked up at him , he was still watching her. He had been all night and she didn't know what to make of it.
Him being there was distracting her. She couldn't fully engage in conversation with the people she really missed and it was annoying her. But she didn't want him to not be there either.
"So , how does it feel?" Jackson spoke up.
"How does what feel?"
"Being a Harper Avery recipient." He said dreamily.
"Oh , i don't know. You tell me , Jackson Avery?" She emphasized his last name.
"That's different. I could never win one myself. So , I have to live vicariously through my friends who have."
Cristina smiled. "That's pathetic."
"So how does it feel?" April repeated Jackson's question.
"It feels ... i don't know , normal."
"She's downplaying it." Alex stated.
"Okay , it feels extraordinary. Life affirming. It feels like everything I have ever worked for has been rewarded. Happy?"
Everyone laughed again and Cristina looked at him one more time.
Callie turned around and looked at Owen as well and then turned back to Cristina. "Would you just go over there?"
Cristina's eyes snapped to Callie. "What?"
"Go over there."
"No. Shut up."
Callie sighed. "You guys haven't changed , you know that?"
"Yeah , well." Cristina shrugged.
Arizona suddenly stood up. "Hey , Hunt!" She called to him. "Come and join us!"
Cristina whipped her head up at her. "Arizona , what the hell?" She tried pulling the woman back into her seat but she was surprisingly strong.
Owen tried to decline but then the rest of the table started coaxing him over and he stood up.
Cristina dropped her head into her hands and wondered why she had ever missed these people in the first place.
Owen walked over to the table. "Hey." He said awkwardly.
She didn't look up yet. Not until Callie announced that they all had an emergent surgery to get to.
Cristina looked up at her. "Seriously? All of you?"
"Yes , all of us. Major accident. Several injured. Some may have died already."
Cristina rolled her eyes and then looked down , refusing to look up at him while everyone gathered up their things and then they were gone and he was sitting down beside her and she was forced to look at him. And God , she wish she hadn't. He still looked like Owen. Her Owen. And all she wanted to do was wrap herself around him and ask him to take her home.
"Hi." He said softly.
"Hi."
"Where's , Mer?"
"Home. She didn't want to come."
Owen nodded. "How is she?"
"Her husband just died , how do you think?"
Owen looked down. "Right."
They were quiet.
She shifted out of her chair. "I should be getting back to her , anyway."
"Cristina , wait."
She looked at him.
"Can I at least explain myself?"
"No."
"Cristina..."
"Owen , don't do this. Not now." She grabbed her bag. "I have to go. See you around."
She started walking off and Owen started panicking. He needed her to know. He stood up. "I have a son!" He yelled.
She stopped. She turned around to him , shock and confusion evident on her face.
"Cristina ," his voice was more gentle this time. "I have a son."
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She threw her bag on the table. "Wait." She sat back down. "You have a son?"
"I have a son."
"What the fuck , Owen?"
"I know."
"Well , whose is he?"
"Mine."
"Yes , obviously , but who's the mother."
"I , uh ," he shifted in his chair. "I adopted him."
"You adopted him?"
"I adopted him."
"Holy shit , Owen."
"I know." He repeated.
"I can't believe this." She blinked. "You're a father." She laughed a little.
"I am."
"You're someone's father."
He nodded. "Yeah."
"Does everyone know?"
Owen laughed. "Yes. Everyone knows."
"Except me."
His smile faded. "I'm sorry."
She didn't say anything. She rested her head in her hands and both of them remained quiet for a long time.
"Do you want to meet him?"
Her head whipped up. "What?"
"Do you want to meet him?" He repeated.
She wanted to say no. She wanted to get up and leave. She wanted to go over to Meredith's pack her bags , grab Meredith and Zola and fly back to Zürich immediately and just move on with her life. But when she opened her mouth , what came out surprised her. "Yes."
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Cristina looked up at the grey , two story bungalow house before her. "So this is where you live now?"
"Can't really raise a child in a trailer."
She kept her eyes on the house , taking in the green lawn and the beautiful trees and the swing on the porch. "Right."
The front door swung open and a tiny human came running out. He ran against Owen , wrapping himself around his legs.
Owen grabbed him underneath his arms and tossed him in the air , making him giggle. "Hey , buddy!" Owen then placed the boy on his hip. "How was your day? Were you good to Susan?"
He nodded.
"Yeah?" Owen beamed. "What did you do today?"
Cristina stood aside , observing and not wanting to intrude. Owen looked so happy. His eyes were sparkling , as were the child's. He was happy and she wasn't the reason why.
He turned to her. "Hey , Connor , this is Cristina. Say hi."
The boy with dark hair and darker eyes , rested his head against Owens shoulder.
"He's shy." Owen smiled.
"That's okay." Cristina reached out and took his tiny hand into hers. "It's really nice to meet you , Connor."
Owen looked at her and then nodded towards the house. "Would you like to come in?"
She hesitated and he sensed it. "You don't have to stay long."
She gave a short nod. "Sure."
Owen dropped Connor to his feet and the boy made a b line to the front door and disappeared inside.
Cristina then followed Owen down the pathway and up the steps to the door where he stepped aside , allowing her to enter first.
When she stepped inside , she heard Connor yelling for his father and Owen excused himself , disappearing up the wooden stairs in front of them.
She took this time to admire the house. From the beautiful hardwood floors to the beige furniture to the grey and white walls , it was all very Owen. Masculine yet elegant.
To her left was the living room with a large L Shaped couch that faced an even larger TV hanging in between a wall-to-wall bookshelf.
There was a beautiful , fluffy rug that filled most of the room and she wondered how Owen managed to keep it clean with a toddler in the house.
To her right was the dining room with a long wooden table in the middle of it and in front of the dining room , she could see the kitchen.
She looked upstairs for Owen and not seeing him , she walked into the dining room and headed for the kitchen. It was all marble tops and white cabinets and shiny ovens , with an island in the middle and pots and pans hanging above it. She wondered when Owen had the time to plan all of this out.
The kitchen had wall-to-wall patio doors that were allowing the evening sun to shine in , giving the room a peaceful glow.
Through the patio doors , she could see the backyard. The grass was a beautiful green and she could see a barbecue grill and a seating area. She could also see a swing set in the distance.
To the left was a door that lead into a sunroom with another dining room table situated inside and Cristina could practically see Owen and his kid having breakfast in there.
"Hi." A voice behind her said and she jumped.
She turned around to find a redheaded woman smiling at her and for a minute she wondered if she was involved with Owen in some way.
"Hi."
The woman stuck out her hand. "Susan. I'm the nanny."
Cristina tried to hide her relief and took her hand. "Cristina. I'm ..." she had no idea what she was. "A friend of Owens." Saying that aloud hurt.
"Nice to meet you." She smiled again. "Where is Dr Hunt?"
"I'm right here." He said behind her as he let Connor down , who ran straight into Susan's arms.
She squeezed him to her. "I've gotta go buddy. I'll see you tomorrow , okay?"
She then explained to Owen that she'd be running late the following day and she'll have to pick him up at daycare. And then she peeled the boy off of her , gave him one last hug and left , leaving them alone.
There was a silence between the three of them ; Cristina wasn't sure what to do with herself and Owen was too afraid to say or do anything , not wanting to scare her off and Connor was sensing the tension.
"So what do you think of the house?"
"It's lovely." Cristina gave him a small smile. "It's very you."
"Thank you."
She nodded.
They were quiet again.
"Susan seems nice."
"Yeah. Connor loves her. We both do. She cooks , she cleans. She takes care of the both of us. I don't know what we'd do without her."
"I bet."
Connor tugged on Owens hand , pulling him down to his level where he proceeded to whisper into his father's ear.
Owen nodded. "Right." He stood up. "Well , this little guy has informed me that he's starving." Owen smiled. "Do you wanna stay for dinner?"
Cristina looked at Owen and then at the boy beside him. "I , uh , I have to get back to Meredith. She's been alone for a while now."
Owen nodded. "Right. That's fine."
Cristina could sense his disappointment but she had to be strong.
"I'll go get my keys and then I'll take you home."
"I can just call a cab." She suggested.
"I wouldn't be comfortable with that. I'll rather drive you home myself."
She thought about it. "Okay."
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"So none of you cared to tell me that Owen has a son?" She yelled. "Seriously? You could've called , Skyped , texted , hell , you could've sent me a postcard saying 'hey , hope you're well. Everything's great here. Oh yeah , Owen Hunt , your ex husband , adopted a freaking child!'"
No one said anything. She had organized a meeting consisting of Alex , Callie , Arizona and April. She didn't have the heart to yell at Meredith.
"Any one of those would've been very helpful!"
"We didn't think it was our place to say." Callie spoke up.
"Well , then , you should've made it your place because imagine my surprise when I show up after two years and it turns out Owen has a tiny human following him wherever he goes!"
"He's cute though , isn't he?" Arizona smiled.
"Yeah , he's adorable , whatever. The shock isn't allowing me to see past the fact that Owen has a son!"
Cristina sighed heavily. "He has a son." She said slowly. "Oh my god , he has a son."
"What's happening?" April whispered to Arizona.
"Fuck. He has a son."
"Should we get Meredith?" Callie asked the group.
"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." Cristina muttered to herself. "He has a fucking son." She said one last time.
Alex eyed her and then stood up. "I'm getting Mer."
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"He's a father , Mer." She said softly.
"I know."
"He's happy."
"I know."
"Without me." She looked at Meredith. "Is it selfish that I'm jealous that he's happy without me?"
"No." Meredith shook her head. "It makes sense."
She looked away again. "It's just ... he finally has what he wanted. What I couldn't give him and he's happy."
"Yeah."
They were quiet.
Cristina looked at Meredith again. "How are you?"
"I'm good."
"Are you lying?"
"Yes."
Cristina took Meredith's hand into hers.
"I have my first ultrasound next week. Will you go with me?"
"Of course."
"Thanks."
Cristina placed her free hand on Meredith's abdomen and rested her head on her shoulder. "If this one isn't as awesome as Zola , I refuse to be godmother."
"Who said you're going to be godmother again?"
"I have to be." She shrugged. "It's like an unspoken rule or something."
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