Author's Note: Hey, everybody! I'm gonna crack this chapter out and squeeze it for as much as it's worth, so I'll see if I can't finish this ark in this one chapter! Epic, is it not? Also, I have someone helping me with writing a bit darker for Coron. She's beautiful, she's funny, and she's a VERY talented Author! Ladies and Gentlemen, may I introduce you to the one, the only... MIDNA HYTWILIAN!

Midna: Oh Goddesses, usoda... I'm none of those things. x.x;

Pax: No need for modesty, you know it's true.-

Midna: -.- Usoda.

Pax: -Well... everyone else knows it, anyway. And, in the end, isn't that all that really matters? Right? ...right? Am I right, readers? ...wow, you guys are helpful. ANYWAY, onto the chapter! *Confetti*


Chapter 50: Behind the Mirror


Enter Coron:


After a gut-wrenching ride through a pipe (If it was up to me, I'd take a dark portal over those things), I was flung into the air and managed to roll to my feet as I landed in the snow.

"Amazing!" a Penguin nearby congratulated, clapping loudly. "Simply amazing!"

"10/10, no doubt! Perfect score!" The second penguin nodded to his companion.

My glare got them both to shut up and shift away from me, thankfully.

"Right," I closed my eyes and focused on the ground. It didn't take long for both George and Iuka to fly out of the pipe and land on top of me.

"Huh," George looked around confusedly, "A lot softer landing than I thought."

"GET OFF!" I barked at them from below, my voice slightly muffled. Iuka jumped off as quick as she could with a gasp. George, in contrast, took his time getting up onto his legs lazily before striding a few steps away and turning back to me like he hadn't of done anything wrong. My anger was overshadowed, however, with how impressed I was by his boldness.

"Wow..." Iuka bent down and scooped up some of the freezing snow in her hands. "What is this?"

"You've never seen snow before?" George questioned. Iuka shook her head.

"I've never seen it on my island," she said. "It's always hot and humid there, nothing is as cold as this... 'snow' is."

Her face lit up as she began playing in the snow. Sourly, I hoped she'd discover what frostbite was, as well as pneumonia.

"Alright," I said, trying to get back on track as I sensed the ground for the Dream Keeper's tracks again. A sharp whistling sound interrupted me and I looked up to see a Penguin in a police uniform staring at me.

"You there!" he said. "Where were you on the night of the fourteenth!"

"...it's the third and I don't have time for this."

"A likely story!" the Police Penguin shouted, grabbing my wrists and pulling out a pair of handcuffs. "You're under arrest! Anything you say-"

I twisted my arms and slipped my wrists out from under his grip before flipping him to his back.

"...doesn't really matter, because your free to go," the police penguin rushed out. He got up and waddled away from me quickly.

"That's what I thought," I growled, straightening myself out, "Let's see..."

Mentally, I went over the tracks I just saw. He turned to the West, but ended up turning back and sprinting east. The smart idea, obviously, would to just cut east.

"Right," I spoke to myself as I headed off eastward. I found both George and Iuka following me as soon as I started walking away, Iuka holding her hands together and breathing on them.

"Snow would be better if it were warmer..." she commented quietly, mostly to herself, as we walked away.


Enter Pax:


You know that part in Wind Waker where Link is shot out of a cannon and hits the stone wall face first?

I now know what Link felt at that time.

"Ow..." I moaned as I peeled myself off the wall and fell on my back on the cold stone floor. "Well, on the bright side, the worst is over-"

I was interrupted by my companions flying down from the sky and landing on my stomach.

"Pain..." I whimpered.

"Mario!" Bombette bent down by my side. "Are you okay?"

"Bleeding internally... but otherwise fine," I managed in a horse whisper. After recuperating, we continued onward. It wasn't long at all before we reached a huge castle made of pure ice. The castle seemed to be made so only half was built, but it was built next to a huge mirror, creating the impression of it being a normal castle instead of half-built. Said mirror was actually a huge polished rock wall, polished to the point where it worked like a mirror. It was so perfectly clear, I would have thought it was just a glass wall with doppelgangers on the other side if I didn't know better.

"Alright... either the one who's keeping the Star Card is very cold, or very vain," I said, looking the mirror up and down. "Or possibly both. I swear, if we have to face an Elvis Penguin..."

I grumbled to myself about how horrible a cliche that would be as I opened the door and entered. My friends followed, confused at my words, though by now they knew better than to ask: That would only lead to more confusion on both parts.

The inside of the ice castle was both beautiful and creepy at the same time. Beautiful because of the way the light shined through the windows and reflected on the ice and mirror. Creepy because there was just some strange feeling of... something off inside that castle.

"Hm..." Keeping my hand on my hammer, I moved on through the Ice Castle. Watt stayed behind and began moving around to see it's reflection move along with it. It giggled as it began doing a little dance, but suddenly stopped short and saw that it's reflection was still moving. Watt's reflection suddenly stopped, a nervous look on it's face. Watt suddenly screamed as it flew back after us, freaked out.


Enter Coron:


We were walking for a nice bit of time when we encountered a wall of rock, a single Snowman standing in front of it.

"Hi there!" it said in a cheerful voice.

"A talking snowman," I muttered to myself. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Are you looking for the Ice Temple?" it asked curiously. I started to answer no, but George stopped me.

"Doesn't the Ice Temple sound like a prime location for them to go to?" he reasoned.

"Hm... alright, that's a good point, I'll give you that," I said with a nod to him. "So, where is this temple?"

"I can't just tell you," the Snowman said. "First, I must give you a test! I must see how pure your hearts are!"

"Oh here we go," I muttered to myself as Iuka stepped forward.

"...what is your favorite color?" the Snowman asked her.

"Um... green, the color of the nature around my village," Iuka answered.

"Hm... your heart is true and pure, full of light," the Snowman said with a nod. "You may pass."

"Wait, how can you know that from just her favorite-" I started.

"Your turn!" the Snowman said, turning to me.

"Joy." My voice dripped with sarcasm as I stepped in front of the Snowman.

"Hm..." the Snowman said. "What's your favorite food?"

"Spiced Curry," I said, crossing my arms. The Snowman stared at me, then gasped.

"No... oh Stars, IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!" it screamed. After covering it's face with it's hands and letting out a loud scream, it spontaneously combusted, leaving behind an opening in the wall, leading forward.

"Well that's just rude," George tsk-ed, shaking his head. "It went and died before it could judge my heart."

"Pick your jaw up and follow before it freezes," I said as I passed Iuka and into the cave that opened, for her mouth was hanging open after the combustion. After shaking her head clear, she followed along with George.


Enter Pax:


"Dead end," noted Sushi, looking at the wall ahead of us.

"There is no such thing, so long as we have a bomb!" I said, nodding to Bombette.

"And don't you ever forget it," Bombette said as she walked up to the wall. "Fire in the hole!"

One explosion later, we saw, once the smoke cleared, an opening ahead...

...and FIVE Bombettes.

"Wha... what?" I asked, taking a step back as I looked between them all. "What in the world?"

"What the... what's going on?" one Bombette asked, looking around.

"Okay, what the heck?" another asked.

"This is insane!" exclaimed the third.

"Well... this is certainly odd," I said, tilting my head.

"That's putting it mildly," another Bombette said.

"So... wait, I'm confused," Parakarry said. "Which one's the real Bombette?"

"I am!" every Bombette said simultaneously.

"...well that's not helpful," noted Kooper.

"You're tellin' me..." I muttered, scratching my head.

"Look, I'm the one who blew up the wall, I'm the real Bombette," one Bombette said.

"Quit lying, I'M the one who blew up the wall, and I'M the real Bombette!" another said.

The five then began arguing with each other.

"Alright, look," I said. "I know exactly how to solve this."

I turned to the Bombettes.

"Where did we go for our first date?" I asked.

"Movie!" "Dinner!" "Park!" "Rooftop!" "..."

I attacked the four that gave me answers.

"Trick question," I said as I slid back to the real Bombette's side. "We never had a date, first or otherwise."

"Very clever, Mario," a non-Bombette said, and the four turned into what looked like little people wearing sheets with holes cut in for the eyes.

"We shall not let you pass!" another said, and the four ran at me, screaming. I jumped into the air and landed on their heads, one-by-one, bouncing and knocking them out so easily it was pathetic.

"Alright!" I said, twirling my hammer in one hand and pumping my other fist into the air in a congratulatory pose.

"Uh... Mario?" Bombette asked.

"Hm?" I turned to face her. She looked up into my eyes. Then, she did something that utterly shocked me to no end.

She kissed me.

I can't tell you how long we stood there in the kiss, nor can I tell you how enraged Bow looked, or how appalled Goombario looked. I can't tell you how Kooper "awww"ed, and Parakarry said "I knew it!" I can't tell you that Watt was giggling hysterically, nor that Sushi smiled and nodded as if she was waiting for it the whole time, and I especially can't tell you how Lakilester looked a bit confused at first, but then accepting.

To tell you the truth, at that moment, I couldn't even tell you what my own name was.

I can tell you, however, it was the best kiss a bomb had ever given me, hands-down.

After what seemed to be an eternity, or possibly just a few moments, or even both, we pulled away. Our breaths mingled together as our faces rested together.

"Are you two going to get a room!" snapped Bow. This snapped me back to reality.

"We should... we should get going," I breathed, not taking my eyes off Bombette.

"Yeah," she agreed.

We stayed in that position for a few moments longer.

"We have to let go first," Bombette giggled.

"Uh... right," I nodded, stepping back from her and clearing my throat. "Let's go. We have a Star Card to get."

With that, I walked through the opening Bombette blew into the wall, she close at my side. Everyone else followed, grinning. Everyone, that is, but Goombario and Bow.

"Did you... SEE that!" shouted Goombario.

"Truth be told, I'm trying to block it out," Bow growled.

"We're running out of time..." muttered Goombario. "We gotta make Mario realize Bombette's true colors before it's too late."

With that, the two followed close behind.


Enter Coron:


We were walking through a dark, damp cave. Water was dripping from the ceiling, and puddles of ice spread across the ground.

"Well, isn't this just a bright and chipper little walk?" George asked.

"We don't need your snide little comments," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Why not?" George asked. "Snide comments make the world go 'round!"

"Let's not get into an argument, okay?" Iuka asked, getting between us and holding her hands out to seperate us. I simply glared at her and she backed away from me.

"Whatever," I scoffed, turning forward. "We're almost there, any-"

I froze mid-step, for ahead of me I saw a giant monster made of Ice. It roared as it raised a club, also made of ice.

"Well this is a surprise," George noted with a nod. Iuka screamed as she dived out of the way. I did the same in the opposite direction. The club landed hard on the ground, missing George by inches. He didn't so much as flinch, however.

"Ooh, nice move," George noted.

"MOVE!" I barked at him, turning my arms into swords. He shrugged and walked to the sidelines while I took his place. I glared up at the ice monster. It glared back. It raised it's ice club, and as it did, I dashed forward and sliced up through it's torso. The sound of a knife scraping across ice was heard as the beast was sliced in perfect halves, split up the middle.

"Hmph." I stood straight up, looking at my work up and down. Then, suddenly, the two halves shook and started acting of their own accord.

"DAMN DIRTY ICE TRICKS!" I snapped as I rolled between two ice-punches. I jumped into the air and spun, slicing each half into fourths. Unfortunately, these pieces began moving after me as well. I held out my hands and my fingers stretched out and turned into a tight net around the ice pieces. I squeezed, and they shattered into thousands of tiny ice cubes.

Then, these ice cubes moved as one to attack me.

"WHY! WON'T! YOU! DIE!" I screamed as I slashed and stomped all the ice cubes. After a few minutes, I stood panting on top of a pile of slush, all that was left of the Ice Monster. Suddenly, a ghostly head appeared.

"Well done..." it said in a raspy voice. "You have defeated my guardian... You are truly powerful, and I must reward this power with-"

Ignoring it, I moved forward through the cave, George and Iuka following.

"H-hey... wait!" the ghost head said. "...I'm so lonely..."


Enter Pax:


"That's weird..." I said as we entered the new room. I immediately noticed two things.

1) There was a door situated on the mirror.

2) We had no reflections in this room.

"Either we turned into vampires within the last twenty seconds or something funny's going on here," Lakilester said.

"Hm..." I walked in front of the door. "Well, it's the only way forward, so..."

I turned the knob, opened the door, and stepped through. Half-way, I noticed that the "mirror" in the room really was just a polished sheet of glass.

"Huh," I said, craning my neck around the open door to see my friends and Bombette (I exclude her because after that kiss, I feel like we were more than just friends now) standing there. They could apparently see me too.

"So... this castle is really symmetrical, only with a thick wall of glass split down the middle to make it appear like there's mirror," Bombette said as she stepped through the door as well.

"But what about our reflections?" I asked.

My question was answered as soon as I opened the door, revealing our "reflections" who soon transformed into more of those cloaked creatures from before.

"...I'd like to say I'm surprised," I said, "but really, it's more like you have this nagging question in the back of your head and you finally found the answer that's so simple you're more like 'oooh...' than surprised."

One very brief battle later, we were on our way through the other half of the castle. It was a bit confusing at first, because everything was an exact reverse replica of how it was on the other side of the glass, but we eventually got used to it.

After quite a bit of walking through this reversed half of the castle, we found ourselves outside. Snow was falling, and we were on a raised platform. At the center of it was what looked like an empty cloak floating, with eyes and a crown made of ice. Surrounding it's head were three ice creatures. One was round, one was square, and one was triangular.

"Kneel!" the creature said. "You are standing in the glorious presence of the Crystal King!"

"...the Crystal King?" I asked. "Honestly, that's what you're going with?"

"Well... yeah?" the Crystal King said.

"Well... it's not the WORST name I've ever heard," I said. "Just... not exactly the BEST either..."

"Hey, my mother gave me this name!" the Crystal King said.

"You were actually given the name 'Crystal King' at birth?" Parakarry asked.

"Well, think about your name," Kooper replied to him. Parakarry thought for a moment.

"...oh," he said. "Huh. I never noticed that before."

"Really, never?" Lakilester asked.

"Nope," Parakarry shook his head.

"Well I find that a little hard to believe," Goombario added.

"No really, I never knew," Parakarry said.

We all then began discussing Parakarry's name and how he could have never noticed the pun in it before.

"...hey!" the Crystal King said, irritated. "You should be fighting me right now! I have the final Star Card! Me, Bowser's most loyal and powerful follower!"

"You're also arguably the only one we could easily beat with a hair dryer," I pointed out.

The Crystal King had no comment.

Well... at least he didn't for a few moments, anyway.

"But you don't have a hair dryer, do you?" he asked in a tone that suggested if he had a tongue he would be sticking it out at us. "So there!"

"Bow?" I asked, turning to the Boo.

"What?" she asked. "Do you honestly expect me to be carrying a pocket hairdryer with me everywhere I go?"

"Well, do you?" I asked her.

"...yes," she sighed, pulling said hair dryer out of who-knows-where and tossing it to me.

"Thanks," I said, holding the Blow Dryer like a gun, pointing toward the Crystal King.

"No... you wouldn't DARE!" he cried out.


2 3/16 Minutes later...


A small puddle of water remained at my feet, along with the cloak and the Star Card. I bent down and picked it up.

"Alright!" I grinned. "Lucky Number seven! We did it!"

I raised the final Star Card into the sky.

"You hear that, Bowser?" I called up. "We're comin' for you!"

Laughing and cheering, we all walked back into the Ice Castle to leave, the Star Card held high above my head in victory.


Enter Coron:


The three of us walked out of the cave and onto a frozen lake. Ahead of us was a huge, frozen waterfall. On the top I could see an area that lead to the Ice Castle.

"Finally," I said, cracking my knuckles as I stared at the top of the waterfall. "Time to get cracking."

Claws extended, I made my way toward the frozen waterfall when I was stopped in my tracks by none other than that paradoxical idiot Goompa.

"Hai!" he said with a grin.

"Out of the way, old man," I growled.

"But you gots to head my warning!" Goompa said. "Too much pollution is causing Global Warming!"

"So?" I asked.

"So," Goompa said, "the major effect of it is about to hit this exact spot!"

He then jumped into a rowboat that wasn't there a minute before.

"What's Global Warming?" Iuka asked.

"Well," George started, when suddenly, the sun blared down at us and everything became MUCH hotter. The water melted, and the currents pushed us all back into the cave, screaming.

Goompa, meanwhile, was singing "Row row row your boat" as he rode his boat down the river.

I swear, orders or not, one of these days I'm going to kill that senile old Goomba...


Author's Notes: *Phew* Some Chapter! Sorry for the filler everyone, but this chapter's finally out! Read, review, and enjoy! The next chapter will come out Wednesday as scheduled, and we'll be on our way to the Final Battle! 'Till then, this is Pax the Dreamer, signing out.