I didn't realize when stepping foot back into the Water Tribe and having fun with the gang will cost my life with Princess and Lady Lili….

"Unhand me, you wretch!" I screamed, seeing that Princess and Lady Lili were taken down with tea and sleeping chemical to the face, but I stood up and had my sword out, pointing at the elderly woman. How was I fooled to think that no kidnapping would happen in the Water Tribe… But I guess my correction was very wrong to begin with. Lili's bodyguards were downstairs to fight off whoever were down there, and I couldn't get their help or else the two young girls' lives would be at stake if I were to leave my post because shouting from where I am at, they will hear nothing.

The elderly lady just smiled, knowingly she won this battle between us. "If you want to follow then simply-!"

WHAMMM!

Something hard hit my head from the back and knocked me out cold.

I woke up in a carriage with the two girls. "Sometimes… I wonder why I always get into these messes…" I shook my head in disapproval of how many times I was taken captive. Too many to count for. "Lady Lili is bad luck in her Tribe." I murmured very quietly, but not silently enough that Princess defended on Lili's honor.

"Seina! It's not Lili's fault, and she's not bad luck." Her pipsqueak voice wrapped around my brain so tightly that it irritated the Hell out of me. I wasn't in the mood for playing little kidnapping games like this. I was tired of this life. I want to settle down and have a normal life where I don't need to fight in wars no more!

"Oh really?! Then tell me why so much happened in the Water Tribe when we had the drug dealer situation? Can you explain that and this situation? Why is the Water Tribe so lazy to keep their own land in check?" I hissed out venom and hate. I was filled with so much negative energy in the Water Tribe because I lost my babies. Everything I had was gone because of that place.

"S-Seina, I can't explain that." Princess struggled on what to say because she didn't know what to do to calm me down.

"Can't explain… Yeah, like how you can't explain why I moved in to get my own babies killed when we faced the drug dealer man!" Only anger circulated in the blood. The memories of it happening was crystal clear. Everything I remember it, it made me very sad to the point I even regret sacrificing myself for her.

"I-it's because you…" Princess' voice was small like a mouse. I couldn't hear her reasoning.

"Because I wanted you to be alive, Princess. But there are days where I regret self-sacrificing myself, and wished it was you, who would've gotten hurt instead of me!" My hurtful and honest words shot Princess' heart. She clutched her chest and curled down, either in pain or betrayal.

"You are her servant, Seina! You-"

I looked over at Lili and scoffed because they did not know the pain I went through. So much pain that I held over these years… True pain, making me wonder why I didn't kill myself when I had the chance to, or when Yoon was doing surgery on me to keep me alive. I clenched my fists and looked away from the two young girls. My eyes were hot with tears.

"What makes you think you can judge me? Why does my actions make me the bad person? You don't know how much I sacrificed for Princess when she was young. You don't even know the price that I've paid to become this monster I am!" I poked my finger to my chest hard. "The tremendous pain will always be with me till I die. The loss of so many people in my lives are gone; dead because I couldn't save them." I gulped, letting the hot tears roam free from my eyes, as I remembered Hyungki. It was my fault. "Guilt will consume you." I wiped off my tears. "Maybe it is I, who is bad luck." My lips quivered, holding in the threatening tears that were to spill out again.

I looked down at the necklace that Jaeha gave me before we met up with Lady Lili for helping reason. I tried to smile and be happy, but I couldn't. To know that my life is way to messed up it hurts. It hurts so much that I think I'm better off without Jaeha or anyone in my life. I can't live anymore. I don't know how to be happy no more. Faking my happiness will only hurt Jaeha. Love and happiness can't mend my damaged heart. I only lied to myself, my front layer... But deep down where I am lost and broken, there I cannot lie. I wasn't happy.

Arriving to the slave area in Sei, we were put on the spot because of Lili's haughty action of grabbing the merchant Nadai lady. Though I was filled with pain from the repetitive events, I went to protect Princess and Lili with my own life, again. And if I didn't, I would be losing them instead of my babies. I swiftly grabbed the whip before it could lay on Princess. My hand was bleeding from the open wound it caused me to have. My blood splattered on the dirty ground, slowly dripping one by one.

I lifted up my nose up high as I stared at the soldiers before me. "You, pesky humans are worthless to live." I reeled in the whip to bring the leader over, feeling the stinging sensation coursing through the bloody wound. "I will slaughter all of you if I have to, even if it means to kill myself in the process." I smirked, knowing Jaeha would be extremely mad at me if I die, but I can't live on no more. I'm done. I will leave Jaeha behind because of my selfishness.

"Seina, no!" Princess yelled, grabbing onto my shoulder, shaking me to bring me back to my sense. "You can't do this! You can't die! Jaeha will be-"

I ripped off the necklace with my free hand and let it off on the dirty ground. How emotionlessly I tore it off my neck, like I never even loved him. But I truly did love Jaeha, yet if the both of us are willingly to die for Princess, then there's no need to cry because it was our duty in the first place. "Tell him that he should move on and that I couldn't lie to myself. I was always hurt since the beginning of time, and I'm better off dead." My words were carved in stones.

"No no no!"

"Get out!" I screamed at the two girls. "I'm doing this alone." No matter how much my voice was straining, I wouldn't let them come closer to me. I wanted them to be alive than dead. I won't let these babies die because of my dangerous action.

I'm losing myself again, I'm sorry.