Chapter 51:

For the first time in my life, I was truly afraid of my dad. He was holding his gun tightly and I was certain he might try to use it on me, which was why I hadn't lowered my gun either. I didn't recognize the look on his face.

He didn't look angry to see me.

Well, he didn't look happy either but at least he didn't look angry.

"What are you doing here?" he asked blankly trying to clear his voice of emotion.

I looked at his face and knew that I couldn't try to lie to him. He deserved so much better than that and there was no point in trying to lie.

"I was with Tbag...Bagwell...but I left and was trying to find the right place to go."

Then unexpectedly, he lowered the gun and took steps further into the bedroom. My instincts kicked in and I took steps backward. Now I could see the anger written in his eyes and I could feel the tears starting to well up. I hated seeing my father like this and was hating myself for stopping here in the first place. It brought up too many feelings and thoughts that I was not prepared to deal with.

"So you decide to come here? Laney, are you aware of how many federal agents come to this house daily? If someone besides me had come here first you would easily be arrested, or worse."

"I watched the house for a while before stopping, and no one comes in and out of here." I said bluntly and he looked genuinely hurt by my accusation. "I'm sorry. I didn't plan to stay. I didn't even plan on seeing you." A stray tear broke loose down my face.

As soon as the words left my mouth my dad's eyes instantly softened. Now he was just crushed that I did not want to see him and the guilt was crushing me like a heavy weight.

Finally lowering my own gun, "I only meant that I came here to try and find out where Michael might be heading so that I can find him."

That was the wrong thing to say because everything in my dad's expression changed.

He dropped the gun to the floor and ran forward right at me. I tried to back up as much as I could, but he caught me by the shoulders and started dragging me over to my bed. He sat me down on the edge of the bed and sat practically right on top of me. He made a motion as though he was going to grip my shoulders with more force, but paused while staring at the sling.

"You said you were with Bagwell." He said his mouth forming a firm line.

"I did say that." With a sort of smile, "but I have Abruzzi to thank for this."

"Don't you see Laney it's not too late! If you help us catch these guys now everyone will just believe you were with them against your will." He said almost too excitedly.

I pushed further away from him. The fact that he would even suggest that made my blood boil. He didn't understand anything. He wasn't worried about me, just his own reputation.

"I wasn't with them against my will. Ok, maybe at first I was but it's not like that anymore."

"This is all my fault. I never should have sent you into Fox River. You weren't ready and I knew you couldn't handle the pressures that the others would give you."

"I handled it just fine! I let them escape because I felt that most of them deserved to be free. Michael, Sucre, and C-note are not bad people. Lincoln was framed by the very government we work for. I didn't exactly plan for Tbag, Abruzzi, and Haywire to go free but I can't change that now."

My father snorted and stood up from the bed running his fingers through his hair. I knew how difficult it was for him to believe these things, but he needed to hear them anyway.

I changed after hearing them so maybe there was hope for him yet.

"You forgot the kid." he said.

"What?" I said confused.

He turned around to face me.

"You mentioned the reasons for all of the convicts' escape, whether accident or purpose, except for that kid."

Just thinking about it, about him, I felt my face starting to flush. My father went wide eyed just by looking at my expression, and I knew I didn't have to explain myself any further.

"Dear God Laney, you love him! How can be in love with him? He is a criminal!"

My father's face turned so red I thought he was going to lose consciousness. I didn't know what I could do that would make him calm down.

"What happened to you, Laney?" He pleaded. "You were so strong. Strong in body and mind. Now, you have been manipulated by every player in this game, and you don't seem bothered by it. These people have inflicted physical pain on you, and you just laugh it off, as though it's just par for the course."

I was at a complete loss for words. Admittedly, this did look terrible from an outsider's perspective looking in. Then again, why didn't I feel absolute rage for things that happened to me, that I witnessed happened to others? Had I really become desensitized to it all? My father mistook my moment of silence for apathy.

"Why is the world just so black and white for you?" I said blinking through the tears. "They broke the law so that makes them bad and not worthy for any kind of feeling. If you would just take the time to talk some of these people you might discover something new."

He rolled his eyes at me like I knew he would, but I cut him off before he could speak.

"Like someone who robs gas stations to provide a better life for the woman he loves. Or, the one who was dishonorably discharged for standing up for what's right."

"Or how about the dedicated brother who pretended to rob a bank so he could be sent to a prison to help his innocent brother before he was executed. But the most evil of them all has to be the immature young kid who thought he was swiping a harmless baseball card. He deserved to be sentenced to a maximum-security facility and experience horrors you can't even fathom."

I was nearly gasping for air when I had finally finished speaking. Even if my dad didn't believe me it felt good just to say those words out loud in a chance to justify myself, and I did feel justified.

"Dad, I had to make a choice, and no matter what I chose there were going to be consequences." I quivered over my next few words. "And I'm still dealing with those consequences every day."

"What do you want from me?" he finally asked.

"I don't want anything from you. We are going to prove Lincoln's innocence alone, and then we are going to disappear."

I shouldn't be telling him any of this. I wasn't sure that he could be trusted and not rat us out, but I couldn't lie to him anymore. He studied me for a few moments trying to figure out if I was being sincere.

"How the hell are you going to prove that an escaped convict is innocent? You are going up against the entire government."

I never told him it was going to be easy, but it was something we had to do. It was the whole reason I let them escape in the first place.

"I can't just let you throw your life away. I should just arrest you and take you in so you will be far away from them."

Dizziness washed over my body and I leaned against the bed to prevent myself from falling. If I got arrested now it would ruin everything. I didn't want to have to fight my father so I could get away, but what else was I supposed to do? He was staring at me trying to get some sort of a reaction, and I had no idea what to do. Was he expecting me to lash out at him and fight against him? Would he really try to hurt his own daughter?

The thought suddenly hit me that if I got arrested then I would have to face Mahone.

"Fine, you can arrest me if you want but I want to know one thing. Do you 100% trust my life in the hands of Alexander Mahone?"

He looked like I just punched him in the gut. I remained standing exactly where I was, unblinking, waiting for an answer. He shifted uncomfortably trying to think of the right thing to say.

"What do you mean do I trust him with your life Laney?"

"You know what I mean. I saw you were reading his file downstairs."

It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen my dad look truly embarrassed about something. His face was even starting to turn red. We were having a serious conversation, but I was fighting not to laugh.

"That was.. I was just trying..." he stuttered.

"You have always had great instincts dad. You always knew when Melanie and I would get into trouble. She died because of him I just know it."

He looked at me shocked.

"I didn't know you knew about Melanie. It was tragic, they said it was a suicide."

The tears came yet again. I didn't expect us to be talking about her. But I never realized how her death must have affected him too. Even though he would never admit it, he loved her like his own daughter.

In a way, it was as though he lost both of his daughters as an outcome.

"Why would she kill herself?" I said a little angrier. "Here is the truth: After we escaped, Michael, Lincoln, and I needed a safe place to change clothes and seek some minor medical assistance. I went to the one person I could trust and it was her. I don't know why, but Mahone wants to destroy everything that has any attachment to the escape."

There was a serious inner battle occurring inside my father. He was replaying every moment with Mahone, every encounter, trying to find the missing links. Was there something he could have done to prevent these deaths.

"You need to stay out of this one, dad." I said firmly.

"You just told me the man I have been working with for months is actually killing off innocent people, and you don't think I am going to look into it?"

"He will hurt you." I said in a defeated tone.

What I did next surprised the both of us. I moved forward and wrapped my good arm around my dad's waist. His body tensed up at first, but then he slowly moved his arms up to embrace my hug. A few tears still trickled down my cheek, but they were a mix of happy and sad tears.

"I love you kid." he said so softly I wondered if he even wanted me to hear it.

"I'm sorry for everything dad. I'm sorry I disappointed you."

His chin was resting on top of my head, "I may not ever understand why you did what you did, but the one thing I do know is that when you set your mind to help someone, nothing gets in your way and you always fight for what you believe in."

He would never know how much power he had in that statement, and for a moment it felt as though maybe in time he could learn to understand the choices I had made.

"I probably shouldn't stay too late, and push my luck." I said with a half laugh but my dad agreed.

I followed him downstairs and back into the kitchen where he noticed multiple of the files were missing. He glanced over at me and with a sheepish grin I gestured to my backpack.

"I told you I was trying to find out the location of Michael or any of the others."

"Well Laney I think you might be in luck. There is word that Michael and his brother, along with the help of another accomplice were headed back to Chicago, although no one can figure out why."

The puzzled look that probably appeared on my face suggested that I was thinking something similar. There's no way that Michael would risk everything by coming back to Chicago unless it had something to do with Lincoln.

"You probably already know this, but Michael is the number one priority. They figure that the other cons will slip up sooner or later and be easily apprehended, but Michael. They've never encountered anyone like him."

"Tell me about it." I confessed. "If you think I'm devoted to a cause you should meet him. The relationship he has with his brother is…intense. They are so different but any one of them would gladly give his life for the other. Right now, it probably feels like it's them against the world."

By the time I realized I had been rambling, I caught my dad staring at me with a peculiar look on his face. It was obvious that he was going through a sort of adjustment period to all of this, and it was going to take some time before he started seeing these people as more than just escaped convicts. Until then, I should try to maintain a balance for him.

"So, you fell in love with an inmate. Isn't that the first rule when working in a prison?" He said in the most awkward tone I've ever heard, and the only thing I could do was stare in disbelief.

"Out of all the rules I have broken the past few months, you are choosing to focus on that one?" I smirked trying to ease some of the tension that was starting to make it difficult to breathe. "But if it makes you feel any better, I didn't plan for it. In a totally clichéd way, it just happened."

"It doesn't." he stated honestly. "When you were growing up I never had to worry about you with… hmm… boys. And of suddenly, this boy makes you swoon."

"Swoon? He would laugh at that." I teased only to see the serious expression on my father's face. "I can't believe we are having this conversation right now, but if you are going to be insistent, Tweener makes me feel good. Makes me feel happy. In a way, we sorted of needed each other in Fox River."

The loud sigh suggested that my dad was deep in thought trying to process everything. And I thought my life was turning upside down. For a second, I thought as though he might pass out from too much overload.

"Look at the brightside dad." I said in attempt to change his mood. "You would probably prefer Tweener as opposed to my other suitor in Fox River."

Confusion was quickly replaced with anger, so perhaps this wasn't the best strategy. If I wasn't careful I could push him over the edge and ruin whatever little progression, we had made today.

"Abruzzi? Did he lay a hand on you?" he asked in a low growl.

"What? No…ew. It was Tbag."

"Excuse me, how did you manage to catch the affections of Bagwell? I don't think you are exactly his "type" or "age". My dad said uncomfortably.

I laughed. I genuinely laughed at this conversation. If Tbag was here he would be roaring with rage as this insinuation.

"He's not so bad… if you live long enough to see it." I said through my laughter.

"Glad you think eight convicts on the run is so comical." He said with his serious tone returning.

"Well I'm sorry, but they aren't just convicts to me." Sensing that a parting of ways may be fast approaching.

"What do they think about you? You're telling me that they were all just cool with a federal agent hanging around?"

"At first no, they were pretty pissed at me." I gestured at my injured shoulder suggesting where that anger led. "But I was not as I seemed either and with time they came around."

"Or they realized you were a young girl who could easily be manipulated."

I whirled on my father and wanted to give him a piece of my mind again, but he was no longer looking at me, but rather staring out of the window and across the street.


There he was.

Alexander Mahone walking up the front sidewalk at a brisk pace. My breath became short and shallow, and my heart started to race. I needed to leave, like now.

Like yesterday.

My eyes drifted over to dad's and he could see the fear in them. It was comforting in a way to see the fear in his eyes as well. Without words, he was shoving me backwards until I was out in the other hallway. He gripped me into a hug that felt final and put his fingers to his lips. I understood the message clearly, stay hidden. He walked back into the kitchen while Mahone knocked on the door. I crouched down and set my bag on the ground so I could fish the gun out of the pocket. If this got ugly I wanted to be ready.

"Alex, I thought you were in New Mexico tracking the brothers?" My dad said in greeting.

The sound of feet scuffling across the floor that suggested Mahone moved further into the kitchen. The clicking of the door and more scuffling meant that my father must have followed, but they couldn't leave the kitchen without giving me away. I sucked in my breath as I heard the footsteps near the walkway where I was crouched, but my dad pulled the chairs away from the kitchen table

"They are long gone now, but reports have been tracking them back somewhere in the Midwest." He responded with little to no affect. The question was, my dad already knew about Chicago, so why did Mahone leave that part out?

"Truthfully, I was called back to the Chicago field office because there has been a report that Patoshik murdered someone just outside of the city."

Haywire…killed someone. Every time one of the guys hurt someone it only added to the guilt I felt for the escape. As much as I wanted Michael and brother to be free and prove the setup, it was difficult to constantly be reminded of the consequences of that choice.

"Liam, I was wondering if you would be willing to get to the bottom of this situation?" Mahone asked in a way that didn't sound like a question.

"Of course, Alex. Did you really drive all the way over here just to ask me that?" There was a strange hesitation in my dad's voice. He was suspicious of something.

Mahone cleared his throat, "I got word that you used your clearance to see my file. Can I ask what you needed to know about me that you couldn't just ask in person?"

"Just following my own orders that came from the men upstairs. Said it was a routine follow-up and they are doing something similar with all the agents working the case."

Even I didn't believe that, so there was no doubt that Mahone was wary. An overwhelming sense of dread was starting to wash over me about this situation, where I thought that this wasn't just an ordinary visit. Mahone was obsessed with Michael and wouldn't track him all the way back to Chicago just to chat with a colleague.

"Any word from your daughter, Liam?" Alex goaded. "Since Utah, she seems to have slipped under the radar."

He knew I was in Chicago.

Shit.

He thought my father knew about it, maybe even was helping me. While he wasn't exactly wrong, it made me feel nauseous knowing that he was interested in finding me. If he succeeded, it would be very disastrous for me. I also couldn't ignore the sense of unease in the back of my mind that my dad could tell Mahone exactly where I was.

"She's as you put it, Alex, in the wind. If anyone knows how to evade the authorities it would be Laney, and she knows how stupid of a decision it would be to return to Chicago."

I smirked at that little quip and silently shifted my weight from one leg to the other. Realization also dawned that I was in desperate need of another pain pill but couldn't risk pulling them out of bag. I settled my pressing my lips tightly together to try and block out the discomfort.

"I never suggested that she would come back to the city, but it is interesting that you brought it up."

"Then what exactly are you suggesting?" my dad said in a strained voice. He was growing increasingly uncomfortable.

"Where is she Liam? It would be in everyone's best interests to bring her in because she can be helpful in finding the other convicts."

"Whose best interests exactly? The bureau's… or your own."

No dad.

I warned you not to involve yourself in this. Why couldn't he just play along with this game?

"It's unfortunate you feel that way."

The ominous tone to his words made me tremble. I couldn't let this go on any further, and put my dad in unnecessary danger. As much as I wanted to help the guys, this was my one chance to do something for my father, and I owed him so much. Whatever happened to me would be worth it to get the hook off him. Without creating alarm, I slowly pushed forward so my weight was on my toes and I braced my good arm against the wall to support myself as I stood up.

Before, I took my first step, a sound echoed through the halls effectively freezing me to the spot. It sounded as though someone was setting off fireworks from a long-range distance followed by something crashing onto the floor. It was unmistakable to anyone with training in weaponry.

Someone had shot a gun with a suppressor attached.

Tears burned my eyes as I realized that my dad would never open fire on someone in his house, let alone a fellow agent. I kept my hand held tightly over my mouth to prevent myself from screaming out.

This couldn't be happening.

Please don't let this be happening.

Not now, why now?

This was it, the last piece of home of family I had left and because of one stupid choice everything was gone. Memories of him all came crashing through my brain even though I willed it to stop. There was so much I wished I could have said to him, try to make him understand what I was trying to do. I had to lean against the wall to prevent myself from collapsing.

My eyes perked up as I heard footsteps shifting around the kitchen letting me know that he was still here. Now instead of tears, I was blinded with rage and slowly I started to backpedal. The kitchen had two entrances to the living room and I was moving toward the back one away from the noise. The element of surprise was the only thing I had left, and I made sure the safety of my own gun was off.

Swiftly, I raised the gun in the air and was standing the doorway. The tears fell freely now as I saw the slumped form of my father's body with the pool of blood around his middle. There was no movement and I knew he was gone. That's when I turned my attention back to Mahone, and he didn't seem surprised to see me at all.

"Hello, Laney." He said casually.

I pointed the gun right at his face with it shaking so badly that if I pulled the trigger I would surely miss. No matter what I told myself, I couldn't get control of my emotions and right now they were running wild. I was shocked, agonized, and raging all at once and I felt that very soon I wouldn't have the energy left to do anything.

"Laney put the gun down. We both know you aren't going to shoot me without a suppressor. The police will be on your tail and there won't be an escape."

I blinked once and pulled the trigger.