Days soon turned into weeks and then into months while life and it's everyday demands took over everyone's day in the group, the couple managed to find a routine for them, but soon they realized that it didn't matter that they lived together now they still need to make an effort to spent time together. Azis was programmed to move in with them in July just a couple of days after Ben's birthday, and Mal was starting to dread having the boy in their space because the few moments she shared with Ben in the privacy of their apartment were the ones that made her feel like they were close.

At the beginning of their married life, Mal remembered thinking that they didn't need to have those spaces. The first weekend after they got married she went to visit Evie and was ready to spend it away from him without a care in the world, but now she hated when he went she wasn't there with her. Ben was as invested in his magazine as she was in her business and even though he used to make sure to send her at least a couple of texts during the day or sometimes eat with her at her office a week after they made their way back from their honeymoon the boy barely spent time with her.

Long meetings took over every hour of his day and even when he wasn't in one Ben was usually busy with articles an presentations for potential investors. In that line of thought, it was that he was starting to plan a longer stayed in Japan so he could talk with some potential investors and kept arriving at the apartment in early hours of the morning when she was already fast asleep.

Mal groaned dropping her pencil over the still empty papers on her desk, she was trying to finish the last couple of designs for her latest line, but her brain wasn't cooperating. Her first thought was to call Ben, but the boy already texted her telling her that he was about to go into a meeting and that he wouldn't be able to have lunch with her and was going to be arriving late at the apartment so she shouldn't wait up for him.

Picking up her phone she texted Evie asking her if she had time to go out for dinner that night and after a couple of minutes of staring at her phone a text pop in with a yes. Mal's mood brightened immediately at the prospect of having a girls night out; she went on with the rest of her day and even though she never finished her design at 6 pm she was out the door.

Evie was happy to see Mal the girl soon started sharing how everything was going at her job and how excited she was to now be in charge of a new line for man. "I have so many ideas about the direction the line should have that I just can't wait to start. I keep drawing things and making annotations after we finished eating I will show you some I want to know your opinion. "

Mal nodded and smiled knowing that this meant that she would probably stay over Evie's that night, sure she missed Ben, but part of her wanted him to miss her. At 1 am she sent a text to the boy informing him that she was staying with Evie and not to worry, the response came almost an hour later with a simple ok. By that time Evie was already asleep next to Mal, so the girl wasn't able to scream her frustration as she wanted too.

Back in Ben's office, the boy was going over a stack of papers for what felt like the hundred time, Tony walked in and sat in front of his desk. "Are you trying to memorize them? Ben, you already read them like ten times today they are not going to change."

Letting his head dropped Ben released a sighed dropping the papers on his desk. "I can't believe that they want to buy the magazine. I just wanted some investors so we can grow, but they are actually talking about taking over. I don't know what to do. I've spoken with them trying to tell them that we can be partners because I can't see myself letting go of the magazine completely. This place was a dream I had back in college, and I managed to make it a reality and I know that I've made it grow as much as I can do alone."

Tony nodded Ben was transparent with the senior staff about his talks with investors so that the magazine could grow and have a more significant online presence a month ago. However a couple of days ago he saw his friend looking overwhelmed and wondered what was going on. Jay and Carrie would spend a large number of hours with him at the office, and everyone seemed to be worried about the boy's state in mind.

Finally, earlier that day Ben called the entire staff and talk to them about what was going on, the investors were interested in the magazine but not in the way Ben was hoping they would. "They want to take over, to buy me out and take the magazine in the direction we had plan but with a larger platform. I've talked to them because my idea was to stay and continue to grow with you, but they don't want that, with that said they did promise that nobody would lose their jobs for at least a year. I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't want to be selfish and only think about my feelings because this place has achieved what it is today due to every single one of you and your efforts. I want the magazine to have a chance to be bigger so I will be thinking about their offer and please feel free to talk to me about any concerned you have about this." Ben nodded at the group in front of him looking defeated and went on his way to his office wondering how long it would be before his staff came to talk to him.

Nobody came in, and Ben was thankful for the solitude although he assumed that Jay and Carrie had something to do with that. By the end of the day, he went on to tried to think of any possibilities that he failed to think about the buyout. Sure, the easy thing to do would be to say no and move on with his magazine just as he wanted, but he was not wired to have himself as the main priority. The money they were offering would also impact Mal's life; sure the girl was doing more than ok with her own business, but she wouldn't need to worry about anything outside her work. Even if they decided to start their family, she wouldn't need to worry where their kids could study, and he would have more time to invest in their family too.

When Tony came in hours later, they talk for a while, and Ben asked him his thought on it. "I'm here because you gave me a chance; without your vision, I wouldn't be here. With that said I understand why you are thinking about the offer, it is a lot of money to ignore, but I think you are doing a great job, Ben."

After a couple of hours, Ben walked to the apartment dreading to be alone, Jay and Lonnie invited him to spent the night at their place but he didn't want to be there. He hadn't shared with Mal what happened with his pitch to the investors; sadly it was still hard to talk to her about certain things. Finally, at his apartment, he made his way towards the kitchen searching for a snack but then giving up and going to straight to his empty bed.

The next day he made his way to the office and pretty much memorize the offer the entire morning before making his way to his therapist office for his appointment. At least, the boy was feeling better about the incident sure he wasn't over it, but at least he now was open to discussing his feelings about it and talking to someone that didn't know him helped him put things in perspective. He even found himself talking about his parents and how their attitude made him feel; he hadn't talked to them since Adam's visit which made him sad. They used to be his number one supporters, and in times like this, he missed the way he could talk to them and asked for advice.

That morning the boy talked with his therapist about everything that was going on with his business and how he felt like the way the investors wanted to have his magazine but not him made him feel like a failure. "Is like everything is great except for me. They love the magazine and the employees, but I need to go if I want them to invest in it. Again I'm the person that doesn't fit."

The men listen to Ben and then started to ask him a series of questions about how the magazine was born even though they already talk about it before, he was trying to show the boy how wrong he was. "You keep saying that they don't want you to be there because you are what is "wrong" with the magazine, but if that were the case, they wouldn't be interested in buying it. I think they don't want you there because they want to take another direction and you wouldn't let it happened. Now what is shocking for me is that you just assumed that you are the problem, if anyone else told you a story like this you would know what is really happening."

Ben argued that the man was the one who did not see things clearly, but the older man continued to prove to him that he was the one that didn't see things like they were and used his feelings to validate his point of view. "Have you asked Mal what she thinks about this?"

The boy shook his head not looking at Sean, the therapist, in his eyes while telling him that after sharing with her that he was looking for people to invest and helped the magazine grow, he never brought the subject again. "You realized that you always do this, right? Whenever you have something exciting or good to tell her you share with her but if the subject is not pleasant or you think that it doesn't put you in the best light you withhold the information from Mal. I'm guessing you've been staying at work late and neglecting spending time with her without her knowing the reason behind the way you are acting that way."

Ben looked ashamed but didn't answer the man. "You can't expect her to share everything that happens with her and be annoyed when you feel like she is pushing you away when you do this. Learn to trust that no matter what happens Mal is going to still feel the same way for you, just like if something change in her life you would stay by her side."

The boy teared up and admitted that he was always afraid that he was not going to be enough for her, since the first time they broke up he kept that fear close to his heart. "I felt horrible; she explained everything but the fear is there. Somedays I don't feel it but when this came up my first thought was that I needed to change their mind before she knew. I know Mal doesn't care about money or status, but I feel like I'm failing her and I hate feeling that and I don't want to tell her that because of course, she is not going to understand. In my mind no matter how many times she tells me I'm good enough I just can't believe it, and I know that is something I need to work out on my own."

The man shook his head with disapproval the boy seemed to have a better idea about the things he needed to work on, but at the same time, he failed to do it. It took him a few sessions to understand how his relationship with Mal made Ben work harder to change and be better, but at the same time, it fed a lot of his insecurities. By the end of the session, Sean urged Ben to talked to Mal and share with her what was going on with him. "You can't expect to build a life together when you keep things from her. I know Mal only by what you told me, and she seems like a someone that would be open to listen and help you with what you are going through. She also doesn't sound like someone that enjoys being kept out of the loop for what you told me, so stop doing that before you pissed her off."

Ben made his way to the apartment earlier than usual that day and went on to cook dinner while waiting for Mal, at first he wasn't sure the girl was going to agree to missed her boxing class, but at the end, she said she would be going home after the office. In reality, the boy never knew how close it came for Mal not to go to the apartment that day at all, she was still mad about the amount of time he spent at his office ignoring her. However, when Evie saw Ben's text asking Mal to have dinner with him at their home, she insisted that her friend made her way to the apartment.

"You can't be mad at him for not spending time with you and ignore him when he is trying to make something special for both of you. Have dinner and then tell him how you feel, we know that Ben only shuts down when something is happening with him, so you go there and tell him that he needs to share with you what is going on." Reluctantly Mal agreed and text Ben that she was going to be making her way home straight from her office. Still, she stayed an extra hour at her office as her way to protest missing out on her boxing class before making her way to the building.

The moment she opened the door to the apartment the smell of pasta hit her, and her stomach growled in appreciation. Mal walked towards the kitchen thinking that she would find Ben there, but it was empty, just as she turned to walk away the boy came to stand at the door smiling at her. "I was waiting for you to arrived to put the garlic bread in the oven. Is going to be ready in ten minutes if you want you can go change before we sit down."

Mal nodded avoiding looking at the boy and walked out of the kitchen not stopping to kiss Ben and pretty much avoiding touching him; she went into the bedroom and change but stayed there until Ben announced that dinner was ready. Taking a deep breath, she walked out of the bedroom and saw how the boy managed to give the table a romantic looked with a couple of led candles and flowers. Ben walked out of the kitchen with the plates and gave the girl a sad smile while putting them on the table and seating down.
They ate in silent until Ben couldn't take it anymore and putting his fork down on the table he reached for Mal's hand while he said her name asking her to please look at him. "You are mad. I can think of a few reasons why but I would rather you tell me why so we can talk about it."

"That's rich; you want to talk about it Ben because I feel like the last thing we do lately is talk about anything." She raised her eyes, and the rest of her argument died in her lips when she actually looked into his eyes. Ben looked so sad that Mal wondered what was going on with the boy, and then felt annoyance filling her because she didn't know and that was on him. The boy quickly ducked his head down once again hiding how he was feeling, and if she didn't feel bad for him, she would scream at him to cut it out.

"You are right, I've been keeping a lot to myself and that is not fair to you because being in the dark is never easy. I've been having some problems at the magazine, the talks I told you about with the investors went in a completely different way." Ben raised his eyes and saw Mal looking straight at him encouraging the boy to continue. Taking a deep breath, he went on to tell her everything that happened, while the girl listened making a few questions along the way and in the end, she asked Ben what he thought of the offer, but after he finished his explanation, Mal looked confused.

"I don't understand you, Ben. You don't want to sell the magazine, so why do you keep thinking about the offer?" A looked of frustration crossed Ben's face but soon disappear.

"Because it is not only my future I need to think about, the magazine is the livelihood of everyone and just thinking of what I want is not right Mal. If I keep it the magazine is done, this is as far as it's going to go, but if I sell it the resources they will bring to the table would help it grow and with it the careers of everyone there. They would get the notoriety they deserved Mal, and I can't put myself between them and a better future." This side of Ben was one of the reasons why Mal felt in love with him, but right now it was infuriating her to the point that she was ready to punch the boy.

"I understand that Ben, but selling the magazine is not what you want and sure the amount of money and resources those investors would bring to the table is excellent, but they are not you. You are the reason why the magazine is successful; you had a vision and made it happened. The people that work there believe in your vision, Ben you gave most of them a chance, and they trust you." Ben shook his head, and Mal could swear that he was angry now.

"You are wrong. Sure, the magazine was my vision, but every single person there help with it." Mal tried to interrupt, but Ben stood making her quiet in an instant. Now with his emotions entirely on show, there was no doubt that he was fuming further confusing the girl. "If I'm such an essential part of the magazine as you keep saying then they wouldn't want me gone. The only thing that they were persistent in was that they would buy me out of it, they don't want me there. So, it is safe to say that I'm not a crucial part of the magazine anymore."

The boy said that and walked towards the bedroom ending the conversation; however, Mal was not done with it and followed him. "We are talking, don't walk away like this conversation is finished. You can't be so blind, not to realize that the only reason they have to want you out is that you wouldn't let them change the core of the magazine. Ben, they just want the name and the respect you work so hard to gain for it and then they are going to do whatever they want with it, and those people that you are so worried about are going to either compromised to their vision or lose their jobs."

Ben shooked his head repeating to Mal that they promised not to change anything and the employees would be saved for at least a year; he then went on to tell her that the amount of money they offered him would mean that they could plan a future without worrying. Mal stood looking at the boy with a shocked expression like she suddenly had a realization that didn't sit well with her. "Is that the reason why you are really considering it? The money? Ben, we don't need it; my company is doing great."

The boy let his head dropped, he knew Mal's company was great and he was proud of how her effort was being rewarded not only with sales but with the praised of people in her same line of business. However, he felt like that didn't help him feel less of a failure about his situation.

A tiny part of him knew that what Mal and Sean told him could be correct, but still, his wounded ego wouldn't let him think straight. "Mal I'm glad that you are doing great, but I want to contribute too, and maybe the best way to do it is to sale. Look I know you hated the amount of time I spent at the magazine since we came back, but if I sell it, I wouldn't need to travel or spent long nights at work. I could look for something to invest and live from that; we could put the money into your company if you want."

"No, if you sell it I don't want you to invest in me. I don't think you should do it, you love the magazine, and you would regret it. I wished you could see clearly what is happening here, but for some odd reason you are not, and I can't think of anything else to say to you." They stood looking at each other in silence with sadness taking over both of them. "I just have one more question. Why didn't you tell me about what was going on before?"

"I didn't want you to know that I was failing." Mal looked confused, and Ben went on. "I bet if you asked anyone to invest in your company people would fight for the chance to work with you, but when I tried they go the opposite way."

Mal shooked her head. "You are not failing, and even if you were, I wouldn't care. I didn't marry the owner of a magazine; I marry the guy that promised to be there for me always. I just wished he would let me be there for him too. Ben we are supposed to share everything, good or bad, but at the first sign of something difficult you retreat into yourself and leave me out. Do you know what hurts most? I'm sure I'm the last one in your life to know about this because for some odd reason you are only ashamed to show your vulnerability to me. You are the first person I've ever shown myself completely. I wished you would trust me like that. "

Ben stayed quiet, not sure what he could say for the girl to understand that he was just afraid of not being enough for her but that she too was the only person he ever wanted to see him completely. Mal took a deep breath making her way to the bed to picked up her pillow. The boy asked her what she was doing when he realized that she was starting to make her way out of the room. "I don't want to sleep near you tonight. I'll go to the other room."

The boy called her name, but she ignored him walking into the guest room and closing the door behind her. That night both of them laid on separates bed unable to sleep thinking back to their argument, wishing that things would be better between them. When morning came, Mal went into their room dreading facing Ben, but to her luck the boy was fast asleep passing out a few minutes before her arrival. Quickly the girl went to pick an outfit and then into the bathroom for a shower to get ready for the day, by the time she was ready to leave the boy emerged from the bedroom and was shocked to see her by the door.

"Mal, please wait. Can we talk?" It took every ounce of restrained for her not to turned, the tone of the boy's voice alert Mal that if she did there was no way she would leave the apartment. Sure, that would be the best way to handle this argument, but she was too hurt right now to talk to Ben. In the middle of the night and idea took over her brain and it didn't matter how much she tried to get rid of it Mal wasn't able to shake it off. What if Ben thought that she was with him for his status and that was the reason he was prioritizing the money now that she was being more successful. A part of her screamed that she was wrong, Ben wasn't like that he was always supportive of her but that was the only reason Mal could come up with for the boy to be so blind about his situation.

"No, is late and I have to go to the office. You know people depend on the boss, so they should be my priority. Bye" With that, she closed the door behind her and went on with his day leaving Ben standing in the middle of the apartment letting his emotions take over him for the second time in the last twenty-four hours.

Note

Not sure what to say here today, I do hope you enjoy reading this.