Note: Okay this turned ugly. But ummm, it was supposed to be just a little tiff and then Kurapica flipped out. D: I'm starting to feel really, really burned out. This winter/spring have been BRUTAL. Consequently, I'm cutting down on beta so that I can keep writing. And I'm behind again in answering reviews and I'm sorry. I love you all. I'm just totally drained.
Beta-reader: PlatinumOwl.
Chapter summary: A fight and a break.
Chapter 52
As soon as Greenwold's helicopter had taken off, Kuroro made his way to the car and slid behind the wheel, leaving Kurapica to run after him. He wanted out. He wanted out of this blasted motel, out of this insane little trip and out of this tricky situation. If he thought about it rationally however, he knew that his annoyance was misdirected. Of course, he was a little annoyed with how the boy kept seeing him as the enemy, kept keeping him at a distance, but that wasn't all of it. He still loved the challenge of it, and that was the perverse thing about their situation. Too easy, and he would have lost interest a long, long time ago. Too difficult and he would decide to turn back before he wasted his time. This was just the right amount of challenging and exciting, and yet progress was just so, so slow, he sort of wondered why he bothered. The blond plopped down on the passenger seat and buckled his seat-belt. Kuroro started the car and ignored the confused look that Kurapica sent him. He peeled out of the parking lot and drove into the small town, the silence heavy between them. A bit of shopping later, and they left the settlement with enough food to last them until they got back to the city.
Kurapica took out the book he was currently reading, and Kuroro put some music on so the silence wasn't quite so loud. They didn't stop for lunch but ate on the go. Kuroro managed to find his cheer again and started tapping the steering wheel along with the music with the tip of his fingers. When he was done eating, the blond didn't pick up his book again. Instead, he looked at Kuroro pensively for a moment. When the older man arched an eyebrow questioningly at him, Kurapica commented, "You're quiet."
"So are you," Kuroro countered.
"I usually am," Kurapica sent back and the taller man frowned at the road ahead. "But you actually look like you're in a bad mood."
He wasn't entirely wrong, but Kuroro had been pushing his irritation out of his mind before the blond had spoken up. "I'm not," he assured him. "I just had a lot to think about, that's all." He was pretty certain Kurapica would see through the lie, but he didn't really mind either way.
"Like what?" the blond asked, his tone clearly dubious.
Kuroro glanced at him, careful not to let himself be goaded into an argument. "Greenwold," he answered after a moment. "I'm not sure what to make of him."
"He's a nice man," the Kuruta stated. "You could try it, sometime."
It felt a lot like Kurapica was actively looking for a fight, and Kuroro had some suspicion on the reason why. Clearly, the blond would do anything at this point to stop thinking, stop remembering. Kuroro didn't get why he was raising such an issue of it, though. He'd been patient, he'd been gentle; what more did the boy want? "Try what?" he asked, though he knew the answer. Let the Kuruta throw a fit. He'd have to do it without his help.
"Being nice," Kurapica bit out, unnecessarily nasty.
"I am being nice," Kuroro assured him, still quite determined not to be dragged into the argument.
"Only because you want something from me," the blond sent back. "And I'm not even sure what that is anymore! We're a far cry from out original arrangement. So do you want me in your Spiders, or are you just after slaking your lust?"
Kuroro arched both eyebrows at him. "Can't I want both?" he wanted to know. "You're free to refuse on either count. I've made an offer to help you in your quest in return for you to join my team and that was the original arrangement. If our current one doesn't satisfy you, we can go back to that. And if you are still not satisfied, then you can leave at any time."
"And then what," Kurapica wanted to know, "you'll kill me?!"
"Did you leave me any other option?" the Spider Head countered. "You've made it clear you won't stop being a hindrance until you or I are dead. Now we can find a way to work out our differences, or I will have to kill you. I do believe I have mentioned more than once that I would rather not."
"And this is you being nice?" Kurapica challenged. His fingers curled in the loose denim of his pants, his hands shaking from the effort of keeping himself as calm as he could.
"This is me being nice," Kuroro acquiesced. "I'm trying to find a way to keep us both alive, I'm telling you that the choice is entirely yours, and I will respect your wishes, whatever they are. If you decide to end our partnership, I will kill you. If you intend to keep looking for the eyes of your people with me, but would rather not I touch you ever again, you can say the word and I'll respect that."
"Somehow I doubt it," the blond cut in and Kuroro checked a sigh. "You'd never touch me again if I said the word?"
"I'd never touch you again," the taller man assured him. "You could go back to that med student you're so fond of and I would respect your wish."
Kurapica's eyes flashed an angry red. "Leave him out of this," he warned. "Leorio's got nothing to do with any of it."
"Doesn't he?" Kuroro was starting to get irritated again, which was a bad. He had to choose his words carefully, and to do this, he would have to keep his head.
"He doesn't!" Kurapica insisted, nearly yelling now. "There is nothing between us, and probably never will be now, thanks to you!"
"Is that what that was?" Kuroro asked curiously. "You turned him down?"
The blond paused, taken aback for a moment, then he frowned at him. "Is that what what was?" His tone was apprehensive, suspicious.
"The dinner," Kuroro said, knowing he'd just made the situation potentially more explosive with his curiosity.
"How," Kurapica's voice went deathly quiet, "do you know about that?"
The taller man shrugged lightly. "Someone told me and sent me the footage," he said, then specified, "One of my Spiders did. Should I not have seen it?"
Kurapica faced the front of the car and whispered, "Stop the car."
"Why?" Kuroro wanted to know. "You want to – Kurapica!" The blond had pulled on the hand brake and sent the car into a crazy spin, and the Spider Head slammed his foot onto the brake pedal, trying to keep control of the vehicle. It screeched to a halt and the blond unsnapped his seat-belt, the buckle hitting the window hard in his haste to get off. He pulled the handle and slammed the door shut as soon as he was out.
Kuroro cursed softly, undid his belt, and stepped out of the car as well. "Kurapica," he called, but the blond ignored him. Well, there was nothing for it. "Fine," he said and the Skill Hunter book appeared. Immediately, the blond spun around and it only made a bad situation worse. Ah, right, he didn't trust Kuroro, did he. But the Spider Head only made their luggage appear and the small duffle bag Kurapica used for his clothes. He stuffed some of the food they'd bought inside, along with the horrible instant coffee that Kuroro wouldn't be caught dead drinking. He dropped it on the side of the road, put his own things back in the Fun Fun Cloth, then he eyed the Kuruta. He pointed forward. "There's another motel some distance away," he informed him. "You need to cool your head. The walk should take you about three days. I suggest you think about what you want. I will wait for you in room thirteen. I will wait a week, not a day longer. If you decide you still want to come with me, you'll find me there." He leaned onto his open car door. "If you don't show within a week, then I will find you, and I will kill you."
He slid back behind the wheel and closed the door, then drove by Kurapica at normal speeds. Once he'd passed the blond, he glanced into the rear-view mirror to see him look at the car, then go back to the bag Kuroro had left on the side of the road. Kuroro looked back to the road after that. He really hoped that he hadn't been too harsh on the kid, but things were getting kind of ridiculous. He wasn't going to play the blond's personal big, bad wolf forever, and it was about time that Kurapica made up his mind. For good. Oh, certainly, the boy had said more than once that he was going to go through with things between them, but it seemed like his resolve hadn't been as strong as he'd intended it to be if he'd gone looking for a fight the moment things had gotten real.
Kuroro frowned to himself. He was fairly certain no one had even touched the boy before, so it was no wonder the kid was overwhelmed. But there was a limit to how much crap Kuroro was ready to take from people and so long as the kid kept spinning between yes and no, nothing would ever be accomplished by travelling around like this. In a way, this was a lot like the first time that the Spider Head had put his hands on him. He was letting him go to watch him return to him yet again. As with the time that he'd let the Kuruta go to Zhaban to be with his friends, he was fairly certain that Kurapica would return to him. And maybe when he did, they could finally be done with all of the stops. There was a chance that the blond would return only as travelling companion and nothing more, but even so, not all would have been in vain. They'd progressed much faster in recent weeks than he would have hoped. So, their partnership had taken half a step back. If it could make Kurapica fall harder than before, it was well worth the risk of it going back to platonic.
It would suck though. Kuroro had to admit, if only to himself, that he'd started looking forward to touching the boy, to seeing him unravel at his hand. For all his inexperience, Kurapica still made a decent lover. And there was something so thrilling about being able to touch him again and again in spite of the hatred that the Kuruta had harboured for him in the beginning. They were a long, long way from where they had stood regarding each other at the beginning of April. As for what would happen from now, well, that was Kurapica's call. Again. Not that Kuroro intended to let the boy play him, no matter what decision he settled on.
When he reached the motel, he secured two rooms for himself. He did get room thirteen, as he'd told the boy, but when he went in, it was only so he could scribble something for Kurapica onto a blank piece of paper. Then he placed it on the desk, well in sight. He'd left a description of Kurapica at the main office with instructions to let him have the spare key. But Kuroro wasn't going to stick around and wait to have his own poisoned knife stuck in his back while he slept. Instead, he took the room across the small parking lot from door number thirteen. And then, the waiting game began.
He didn't think that the Kuruta would hitch a ride, even on the off chance that a car were to pass by him, chance that Kuroro considered exceedingly unlikely to happen, but he still never really looked away for long. He sat by the window his his room, sitting on top of the desk so that he could see room thirteen easily whenever he lifted his gaze from his books. He napped for short periods at a time to save his strength, but he sat by the window more often than not. One night went by, another, and yet another. If Kurapica were to walk a steady but unhurried pace, he was probably nearing the motel. Yet two more days passed without any sign from the blond. It was getting dangerously close to the day where Kuroro very much intended to leave, with or without the Kuruta. It was a little disappointing, but the Spider Head wasn't going to admit defeat just yet.
Evening had fallen on the last day before he was to leave, when he finally spied the blond looking at number thirteen. Kuroro lowered his latest book and observed him as he hesitated only a moment before he walked up to the door and knocked. The sound was steady, nearly loud in the quiet evening. Kurapica waited in front of the door for some time, then he looked around and stared at Kuroro's car for a moment, where he'd left it right before the door to room thirteen. Another moment and the boy started searching the parking lot once more. He saw the sign for the main office and headed in that direction. The Spider Head gathered his things quickly, glad he'd taken the time to shower a few hours prior. It wouldn't have been right to either smell like he'd spent days waiting or just stepped out of the shower. He waited until the Kuruta reappeared with a copy of the key and watched him walk into the room. The light turned on. Kuroro waited for a little longer, then he finally came out of the door and made his way unhurriedly across the parking lot.
He knocked lightly and went in, making the blond look up from his note. "Saw the light," he said by way of hello. "Thought you might have come in while I was out." He closed the door behind himself and walked a step closer, but then he stopped and tilted his head at the Kuruta. "Have you reached a decision?"
Kurapica set the paper back down carefully onto the top of the desk. "I have," he confirmed.
"And?" Kuroro pressed him.
"I'm here, aren't I?"
