Chapter Fifty-Two

For the very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream"

(Hamlet, Act II Scene II)

The rest of the afternoon was spent indoors because of the terrible weather brewing outside. The children listened to a long-winded explanation of the beautiful Sonnet 18, and then continued with their individual lessons until it was supper time.

When the dishes were all cleared and the family was again gathered in the living room, as they had asked her to, Marta approached Maria, who was engrossed in a book on the couch.

"Fraulein Maria?" she asked, tugging at her governess's skirt.

"Yes Marta?"

"I'm tired of studying – may we take a break?"

Maria didn't have to look over at the Captain, who had been reading to Gretl, to answer. "Of course darling, you all have been studying the entire day. Did you have something else in mind that you would like to do tonight?"

"I would like to learn how to dance like you did at the party" she said, her wide brown eyes filled with innocence.

"Oh Marta, I am hardly qualified to teach you to dance properly"

"You danced with Father! I saw it!" Gretl was climbing out of the Captain's lap.

"Oh but my loves, there isn't enough room in here." Maria protested, looking around the small space.

"We could use the ballroom?" Liesl was looking eagerly towards her father.

Maria's eyes widened at the suggestion, remembering her first day at the villa. Even after using it for the puppet performance, she was wary of that room.

"Yes, your fraulein is very fond of the ballroom…" the Captain laughed, and the children were delighted to hear they would be getting their way.

They chatted merrily as they made their way through the hallways and towards the grand room, debating whether a waltz or a foxtrot would be more difficult to learn versus more practical to know.

The Captain and Maria followed closely, and Maria could have sworn she heard him singing under his breath "Dancing in ballrooms and pinecones at mealtime..."

When the Captain flicked on the switch, Maria was again taken by how ornately decorated the room was in its golden splendor.

"Why don't you and father show us a waltz, so we can see what it is supposed to look like before we practice?" Louisa asked not too subtly.

The Captain, who had already begun making his way towards the piano, paused.

"But what about music, darling?" he asked, causing his children to pause, realizing their own mistake.

"We could sing?" Friedrich suggested weakly.

"I don't think waltzes generally have words" Liesl rolled her eyes.

"Hum then?"

Before they could contemplate what to do next, Frau Schmidt knocked on the opened door.

"There is a telegram here for fraulein Maria" she announced.

The Captain sent Maria a questioning look, but she simply shrugged and followed the housekeeper, a slight touch of worry in her eyes.

"Frau Schmidt!" Liesl called suddenly, surprising the Captain. "Who delivered it?"

"Young man Rolf of course." The elderly woman smiled knowingly before accompanying Maria away from the room.

The sixteen-year-old paused, trying to figure out how to subtly extract herself from the room with a father that was infinitely more perceptive than before.

"Invite him in this time, Liesl. It's already storming outside – I don't think you'll make it to the gazebo." The Captain laughed at his eldest daughter's shocked expression.

Liesl ran towards her father and wrapped her arms around him.

"Thank you, Father." She whispered, and Georg kissed her on the temple before releasing her.

"Much better they be under my eye than sneaking around anyways." He noted to Friedrich, as the two men watched Liesl tear through the door, hot on the heels of her governess, both with their arms crossed and a bemused expression.

Within five minutes Liesl and Rolf were sitting in the kitchen drinking tea and munching on cookies, but Maria still had not returned.

With each passing 'tick' of the second hand of the clock, the Captain felt worse and worse. He had no idea what was in the telegram, but for Maria to have disappeared for so long worried him. The first thought that had come to mind was illness – Sister Sophia, the Reverend Mother…they had seemed so healthy a week prior, surely they could not become ill that quickly?

Almost fifteen minutes had passed before Maria finally re-appeared at the door. Her eyes were red, and the makeup the girls had put on her smudged a little in the corners, though she had obviously tried to clean herself up.

"Is everything alright?" the Captain asked as he and his children gathered around her.

"It's fine…absolutely fine" she said, trying to calm her visibly trembling hands. "What would you children like to do now? Still hoping for a dancing lesson?"

Marta had not been told to say anything, but was growing tired of the scripted days that her siblings kept planning but refused to tell her why. She decided it was time to take matters into her own hands to make sure she got at least a half hour of fun before it was bedtime!

"Fraulein Maria, could we go outside and play in the rain?" she asked softly.

Maria thought about it for a moment, looking out the window. The worst of the storm had passed, the lightning and thunder had been replaced with a steady rain shower. She knew it was warm outside – the heat had surprised her when she had met Rolf at the door. But even more than that, and what Marta had no way of knowing, the thought of being confined indoors for another minute was motivation enough.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea, Marta" she agreed, receiving a very mixed response. Marta and Gretl took off running towards the doorway before their father could say anything and ran out into the rain.

Everyone else simply stared at her.

"It's beautifully warm outside, and everyone needs to dance in the rain at least once in their life." She defended herself.

Not waiting for their response, Maria took Brigitta in one hand, Louisa in the other, and pulled them through the glass doors into the rain. Kurt and Friedrich took one look at each other, screamed simultaneously "Mud wrestling!" and ran after their governess, leaving just the Captain in their wake, wondering if he had been somehow transported into an alternate dimension.

It was most assuredly not a good idea – the grounds were slippery, the wind chilly, the sky dark… he stopped his brain, wondering when he had become such an old man. As a child he and Werner loved being outside in the rain, and he would get so angry when his mother made them come in…

And just like that the Captain was eight years old again. He didn't stop to think as he took off his coat jacket, socks, and shoes then followed in the footsteps of the rest of his family.

When you do dance, I wish you

A wave o' th' sea that you might ever do

Nothing but that

(The Winter's Tale. Scene IV, Act IV)

It is the most freeing sensation to be outside in the rain, toes squidging in the wet grass, the dark sky taking away your inhibitions. Maria and the girls had kicked off their shoes, and were singing 'My Favourite Things' at the top of their lungs as they danced in rain.

The Captain had the sense to flick on the outside lights by the lake, giving enough of a glow to the night that he could make out forms, but not expressions.

Was she trying to cheer herself up? Was it all an act so the children wouldn't know what's wrong? Was it an act for him? If so, she was a wonderful actor – despite the dark sky, she was practically glowing as she swung his daughters around, trying to maintain her footing on the wet grass.

The Captain had no explanation for her behavior, but watching her twirl about on the grass, effectively ruining Liesl's dress as she slipped and slid, she had never looked more beautiful. Not when Max had paid thousands for a dress, hair and makeup. Not on the night of the ball. Not this morning when he had been unable to breath.

She danced with all the girls, twirling the little ones like ballerinas, and making an effort to cause Brigitta and Louisa to fall into each other or a deep puddle as often as possible until the three of them were in a heap, their laughter resonating off of the mountains.

Warm raindrops were flowing down her face and causing her eyes to shine in the slight light from the lake. Her cheeks were reddened from dancing about, and her feet never stopped moving across the wet grass. Her laughter filled the night's calmness.

The Captain took the hands of his two youngest daughters and spun them, joining in just so he could be closer to the beautiful dancer.

The boys were playing in the mud, running and then seeing how far they could slide. They called for him to join them, but he resigned, making his way towards a familiar flower garden.

She's beautiful, and therefore to be wooed

She is woman, and therefore to be won

(Henry VI, Act 5 Scene 2)

The girls had stopped sliding and had decided to join the boy's game of slip-and-slide when the Captain finally made his way back. With a smile, he placed a single flower of a different colour in each of the girl's hair wet hair, earning him four hugs before they were off again.

With his last flower he made his way to Maria, stepping directly in front of her.

Without a word he placed the small white flower that he would only ever associate with one woman behind her ear before smoothing the wet hair overtop to hold it in place.

"Why am I always last?" Maria asked with a smile, her hand covering the Captain's that was still placed on her cheek.

"Because you are the most important" he responded immediately without the slightest teasing to his voice.

They could both feel the air between the crackling and in shock Maria took a step back, dropping his hand as her eyes widened.

"Will you tell me what the telegram said?" the Captain asked softly, but could still be heard above the pattering rain. Whatever it was, he had to know. It was the only way he could begin to help her.

"Once the children are in bed," she agreed in an equal tone.

It physically pained her to turn away from the man in front of her and return to the screaming children, but she was too frightened to choose otherwise.


Liesl and Rolf watched her siblings flailing about in the grass with great amusement.

"Liesl, your family is absolutely crazy" said Rolf. "One minute I'm afraid your father's going to send a torpedo at me and the next I see him prancing about in the rain like a child."

"I just hope it's not genetic" she groaned, and they clinked their glasses together.

Liesl shook her head as she watched their ridiculousness, wishing with her whole heart she could be out there with them instead of putting on an act for the boy beside her.

If this is what it meant to be a mature grown up, she suddenly wasn't so eager to turn seventeen.

But her eyes found her governess, twirling about, mud splashing on to her bare legs and dress. And it gave her reason to hope.

Maybe maturity didn't have to be about always acting like an adult.

Just maybe it was about knowing when to act responsibly, and when to dance in the rain