"The Wolf Girl" – Alvin Schwartz

WITH ARTEMIS AND HER WEIRD, ANNOYING HUNTERS

While Artemis was trying to go to sleep, the other Hunters in various tents were talking about one thing after another. Aggravated, Artemis got up, put on her bunny-rabbit slippers, and headed outside.

It was winter, so Artemis always told her Hunters to get to bed early during the winter. Tonight, though, was a different story.

Artemis reached the first tent, and found all of her ten-year-old-looking Hunters sitting up in their bunks, giggling at something they were talking about.

"So, my girls," Artemis said in a dangerously calm voice, "why are you still awake? It's not Friday night. That's not for another three days."

"But, Lady Artemis," said one, Stephanie, "we're telling funny ghost stories."

"Oh, are you now?" said Artemis.

Stephanie nodded.

"I'll tell you all a story. Go on the logs outside and Stephanie, I'd like you to start a fire for me. I'm going to get the other girls."

Artemis went to the other five tents, and she was even more angry than before. Thalia was texting again.

"Thalia! If you don't stop texting, I'll move you down a rank!"

"But, Lady Artemis, I'm texting my father."

"And what is so funny that you're laughing while you're texting Zeus? Didn't you read rule twenty-nine on the Hunting Contract?"

"No one reads that, Artemis," Thalia said snottily.

"Give me the phone!" Artemis yelled. "And go sit on the logs outside. I'd like to talk to you girls to get you off to sleep."

Thalia reluctantly handed over her phone. Artemis took it and read the texts that Thalia and Zeus were having.

THALIA: Hey, dad.

ZEUS: Hello, daughter.

THALIA: I wish I could date boys. It's not even nine-thirty and Artemis sent us to bed. Stupid goddess!

ZEUS: Now, Thalia, she's still a goddess. You must respect her. Understand?

THALIA: Yeah, but, dad? I don't like these dumb rules.

ZEUS: Well, that sucks. Good night! Guess what Hera and I are doing?

THALIA: What?

ZEUS: GUESS, DAMMIT!

THALIA: No, dad. I know what you two are doing…

ZEUS: Yeah, it's not appropriate for this texting thing.

Artemis was enraged, and that gave her a good idea to help get the Hunters off to sleep.

"So, my girls," said Artemis, once everyone was sitting around the campfire on logs. "I've got a story to tell you about my birth."

"You said you were born on an island called Delos and helped your mother give birth to Apollo," Stephanie said.

"So goes the myth," Artemis said. "Here's what those history guys didn't tell you."

DAUGHTER OF LETO

Once there were two gods named Zeus and Leto. Zeus was a good-looking man, while Leto was pretty and small. They married near a small creek in Texas in 1855.

The thing about their marriage, however, was very odd. Zeus was a trapper (he trapped stuff for a living), and Leto was a housewife who cooked and cleaned and made Zeus pizza on Friday nights when he came home from trapping.

If someone were to travel near Devil's River in Texas, they'd come to their cabin. When Zeus and Leto were married, they'd built the cabin from tree branches. Near it, they had a garden and a few trees. An arbor was placed over their heads, because it got really freaking hot on hot days!

Not long after their marriage, Leto was expecting a baby. She was nine months pregnant, when she went into labor. Noticing this, Zeus the Idiot left his wife home all by herself to endure labor pains, while he raced on horseback to Poseidon and Amphitrite's house, who lived several miles away.

"Who's that at our door?" asked Poseidon, who was drinking a beer.

"Dunno," said Amphitrite. "Get the door!" she commanded.

"Gods!" Poseidon stood up and saw Zeus there.

"Hey, y'all. My wife's having a baby. I need some help."

"Yeah, do I look like I'm a doctor? Heck, I don't even know what a doctor is!" Poseidon said, offended.

"And why isn't your wife with you?" Amphitrite demanded.

"Well," Zeus had to think about it. "Yeah…she's too fat, okay? She's nine months pregnant and I can't put any more strain on Pegasus here!"

Poseidon grabbed some whisky (the natural numbing drug in those days) and a Popsicle, and they rushed off to the cabin.

As they were riding along the bank of Devil's River, a horrible thunderstorm came up, and a bolt of lightning came down, struck Zeus in the chest, and he was killed. Yeah, you heard me! Zeus, the god of lightning, was given a taste of his own medicine. It must've been that chick Hera, whom we all hate with a burning freaking passion.

Anyhow, Poseidon and Amphitrite traveled to his cabin, but they didn't arrive until the next day. By then, Leto was dead, too. She must've given birth before she did, because there was blood everywhere, but they couldn't find the baby. There were wolf tracks all around Leto, so they decided the wolves had eaten it. So after Poseidon ate the Popsicle, and Amphitrite kicked him for doing so, they buried Leto in the garden and headed for home.

Many years later, some stories began to rise about this little girl. Some swore it was true, while others believed it to be a myth.

This story begins in a small part of Texas not far from Leto's grave. One morning, early on, a pack of wolves raced in and killed a bunch of satyrs. Attacks like this were pretty common. A little boy named Hephaestus thought he saw a naked young girl with auburn hair, running with them. A year or two later, Demeter came upon some wolves eating a fresh satyr. Eating the satyr with them, she said, was a naked girl with auburn hair. When the wolves and girl saw Demeter, they bolted. Demeter claimed that the girl, at first, ran on all fours. Then she stood up and ran like a regular human, just as quickly as the wolves.

People started wondering if this "wolf girl" was Leto's little daughter.

As the story goes, some people began to look for the girl, whom they'd named Artemis. They searched everywhere, and one day, they found her, walking in the desert carrying some sticks.

Two men on horseback saw her on this day, and they told her to stay still. But Artemis did the opposite. She dropped the sticks, hid in one of the desert caves, and breathed quietly and waited. But the men found her, and she fought them and scratched them. Soon, she became so scared, she screamed like a scared little girl, and howled like a scared little wolf. Her captors, Apollo and Hermes, tied her up, threw her over their horse, and rode off with her to a prison in the middle of the desert.

"Hey, Apollo," said Hermes, "let's turn her over to Ares once we get the chance."

Ares was the sheriff of the town at the time.

"Good thinking," Apollo said.

So they brought her to the prison and untied her in a room. Artemis was so frightened that she hid in the darkness. But it wasn't long before she began screaming and howling.

"Gods, that's annoying," Apollo muttered.

"I can't stand this!" Hermes replied.

At last, Artemis stopped.

When night fell, wolves howled in the distance. The story says that every time they stopped, Artemis would howl in reply. Suddenly, wolves came in from the desert and killed a bunch of Apollo's cattle he'd been herding all these years—yes, the cherry-red ones. But Artemis was in the room, locked. She pulled a board blocking her connection to the outside world, crawled through the window, and ran off.

Years later, Apollo and Hermes searched again for Artemis the wolf. Soon, they found her, feeding two puppies. When she saw them, she picked up the puppies and ran, and they chased her, but she left them behind. And they never found her again.

STUPID HUNTERS AND ARTEMIS

Stephanie, Tara, and Misty were all biting their fingernails. Other Hunters were impressed with the story, but they weren't as scared as those three.

"Now, hopefully that'll teach all of you a lesson. I'm going to come around in a half-hour, and if I find a tent light on or hear another giggle, I'll get Lady Athena down here," Artemis warned. "Now, my dears, off to bed with you!"