Chapter 52.

After school was over both boys went their separate way after agreeing that Frank would come over to Gerard's later. When Gerard and Mikey got home they found that their mother had invited one of her friends over, in the friend's arms was a small baby that giggled and gurgled happily waving its small arms around. Gerard didn't like baby's but he didn't dislike them either they were just there. Mikey got bored and left and Gerard was about to follow when his mothers friend spoke.

"Can you look after him for me?" She smiled at him then at the baby.

"I don't know how" Was all he could say.

"Its easy" She walked over to him baby in arms and said "Put your arms out" He did as he was told. She then placed the baby in his arms "Now just hold him, If he starts to cry rock him gently or get me, okay?"

"Okay" He said as she walked into the kitchen with his mother. As he held the baby in his arms he started to think how cute the baby was as it giggled at him and he couldn't help but coo over it. After about ten minutes he was acting like a mother would cooing over it, cuddling it and just adoring it in general. It grabbed onto a piece of Gerard's long hair and giggled as Gerard smiled at it. Mikey came back down stairs from his room and stopped in his tracks when he saw Gerard cuddle the baby in his arms.

"What are you doing?" Mikey just had to ask

"Looking after him" he said quickly before going back to the baby.

"Really because it looks more like you think that you and Frank made it together and then you pushed it out your mangina" Gerard frowned.

"Just because you can't process feelings and are too young to have sex. Plus you have a mangina"

"Says the guy who is cooing over a baby"

"He's really cute, look at him." He held the baby up and shoved it in Mikey face before going back to cuddling telling him about the newest comic he'd gotten only replacing anything with even the slightest bit of violence to something cuter like throwing candy at the enemy which made Mikey roll his eyes. The doorbell rang. Mikey waited for Gerard to get up and answer it but when that didn't happen he got up and did it himself. He opened the door to see Frank standing there.

"Congratulations on the baby" Mikey said.

"What?" Frank had a confused look on his face which also said 'did some girl rape me?'

"You'll see" Mikey smirked and let Frank into the living room where Gerard was sitting cooing over the small human in his arms.

"Gerard? Did you kidnap that baby?" Gerard looks at him with a confused expression that's full of innocence.

"No I'm babysitting for my mom's friend" Frank looked at the baby with a confused expression on his face not sure what to make of it. So he sat down next to Gerard and watched him tell the baby story's about a turtle that he had named Pedro. The baby was also starting to grow on Frank he had to admit that it was really cute when the tiny baby giggled although he hadn't been completely brain washed like Gerard had. The baby's eyes soon started to droop and he fell asleep in Gerard's arms making Gerard 'aww' at it. The baby's mother soon came back through to the living room asking how her "little angel" was doing.

"He fell asleep" Gerard commented before adding "he's so cute."

"Thank you. I think he likes you" Gerard looked down at the small baby who was holding onto the front of his shirt drooling and making little snoring noises. Gerard got up and passed the baby back to her quickly saying good bye to it before pulling Frank up by his hand yelling a quick goodbye and running out of the house with Frank behind him. He stopped once they were out the front gate and let go of Frank's hand smiling at him.

"Why are you so happy?" Frank asked not quite sure what to make of overly happy Gerard.

"I have a wonderful boyfriend why else?" Gerard was smiling like crazy but his eyes where sad.

"What's wrong?" Frank knew something was wrong.

"Nothing" and Frank would have believed him if he hadn't dropped his smile for just a second.

"Gerard please tell me what wrong" Frank pleaded he knew that Gerard wasn't quite himself. He watched as the smile dropped.

"What if that baby ends up like me?" Gerard asked quietly.

"What do you mean?" Frank had never been asked this question before.

"What if he ends up hating himself or bullied or abused? WHAT IF HE ENDS UP KILLING HIMSELF?" Gerard was getting distressed and People where starting to stare at them a few neighbours where coming out of their homes to see what the yelling was about.

"I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO END UP LIKE ME I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT!" He screamed tears running down his cheeks. Frank pulled him into a hug trying to keep him calm. Several people came running up to see what was wrong. It didn't help, Gerard just hid by placing his head against Franks neck. What was worse was that someone from their school had been out with what looked like their mom and heard, and see, the whole thing.

"Can you lot just go?" he snapped but only a few left.

"I SAID FUCK OFF!" everyone moved away quickly. He went back to trying to work out what was wrong with his boyfriend.

"How about we go back inside?" Gerard shook his head and Frank didn't want to get him to do anything he didn't want to even though people where slowing down their cars to see what was going on.

"Wanna tell me what's wrong?" Gerard nodded and pulled away.

"I just- when I saw that baby I thought about how everything had gone wrong with m-me and I couldn't let that happen to him I didn't want to let him go b-b-because then he'd just end up like everyone else; completely ruined." Gerard went back to sobbing while all Frank could think of was how badly Gerard had been affected because of the last few years then anoughter though hit him.

"Gerard what did you mean when you said that you couldn't take it anymore?"

"Everything's just making it harder for me to cope and I hate it. Everything's a mess and I can't do anything to stop it. I have no control over my life and I just can't take it, I just can't." By the end of it Gerard was starting to get hysterical.

"Calm down. Gerard I love you a lot and I really want to help you but you have to tell your mom. That's the only way you'll get help." Frank held his hands in his as he said this.

"I can't." He sniffed.

"Why can't you?" Frank understood it would be hard but if he was going to help he had to find out what the problem was exactly.

"I can't do that to her she'll feel so guilty I just can't put her through that."

"She'll understand Gerard She's probably surprised that you haven't been acting weirdly already." He kissed him gently but when the kiss was broken Gerard said something that really surprised frank.

"What if I end up as one of those people who have sex with strangers just because I feel so bad all the time?"

"You won't."

"How do you know?"

"Because I won't let you because in the future the only person you'll be having sex with is me." Frank wanted Gerard to know that he had no intention of letting him go.