A/N: Once again, thank you all so much for the tremendous feedback you've been giving. It means so much!
***JIBBS***JIBBS***JIBBS***
During the night, nurses came and went, checking Jethro's vitals. They were surprised to find a woman in his bed, most likely his poor wife, especially after dealing with him when he was awake. But no matter what irritation the injured man had produced in them, the sight of his sleeping infant always brought a smile to their faces.
Jenny got up a few times during the night to take care of Julia, but after each time she crawled back into bed with her husband.
He wasn't affectionate, and she wasn't sure if he was pretending to sleep through everything or if he'd been sedated to help his body heal. She didn't care. He had welcomed her into his bed, and it was enough. Granted, the smell of a hospital can be overwhelming, but while she had her head on his chest, she smelled him and the comfort it brought her was immeasurable.
The last time she was up with Julia, she allowed herself to wonder what it would be like in a few hours when they would both wake up in each other's arms. Would he be happy to see her? Would he run his fingers through her hair, kissing the top of her head as he often did? Or would mean Jethro be back? She tried to push the doubts out of her head as she drifted off to sleep again.
A couple of hours later, Gibbs was slowly waking up. He'd slept through the night, which surprised him since he knew Julia must have woken up a few times. He looked down and saw Jenny still asleep, her head on his chest. He inhaled, smelling her shampoo, which brought him comfort. He wanted to wrap his body around her when it hit him.
He couldn't move his legs.
For a moment, he'd forgotten but then reality, like a horrible hangover, pounded at his head. Gibbs felt tears begin to well up in his eyes, his nightmare turning out to not be that at all but rather his current condition. He wanted to hold onto his wife for dear life, to see if she could stop him from drowning. That is, until he spied someone out of the corner of his eye, holding his daughter.
"Dad?" he bellowed, incredulous. He then looked down at Jenny, who was woken up by his yelling. "You called my dad? How could you do that without asking me?"
Jenny sighed as she sat up. And so it began anew. She looked at Jackson and tried to apologize with simply a look between them.
For his part, Jack quickly sized up the situation. "I'm glad she called me, son. If there's any way I can help, I want to be here to do it."
Gibbs groused. "There isn't."
Jenny hopped down from the bed and put her shoes back on. "Yes, there is. Even if you don't, I need him." She turned away from her husband and hugged her father-in-law. "Thank you for coming. Look, Julia, it's your grandpa," she smiled, trying to put on a brave front.
Gibbs tried to reign in his temper. "Go have breakfast or something."
Jack looked from Jenny to his son. "I could go out and get something for the three of us and bring it back here."
Gibbs rolled his eyes.
"That's not what he wants, Jack. He wants us out of here. He likes to push anyone who cares about him away." She then turned her attention back to her husband. "You can glare at me all you want. What did I say that wasn't true?"
"Jenny, can you give me some time alone with Leroy? I'll meet you in the waiting room." He handed Julia back to her mother.
Jenny walked over to her husband before leaving. With her free hand, she grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at her. She stared into his eyes, trying to speak to him that way, their silent language, before she leaned down and gently kissed his lips for a few seconds. She felt his hand caress her cheek as she was pulling away. They continued to stare into each other's eyes. Jenny couldn't help it; a few tears fell down her cheek. She worried how he'd react as she quickly wiped them away. He didn't say anything but she saw a tear of his own slide down onto his pillow. She kept hoping he'd tell her to stay but when he didn't, she headed out of the room.
Jack shook his head. "What are you doing?"
Gibbs was ticked off. "Just go to her, Dad. She's the one who wants you here." Jack looked at him, trying to figure out what was going through his head. "What?"
"You two need each other. Now more than ever. Why are you pushing her away?"
Gibbs remained silent. But he soon realized his father wasn't going to leave until he got an answer. "It hurts too much to look at her. Sometimes I can barely even breathe. I see Jenny and all I can think about is what if I stay like this? What kind of husband, what kind of father will I be?"
Jack shook his head. "I don't mean to be insensitive son, but you're not the first man to go through something like this. Do you think others before you were helped by having a family, or do you think all men in wheelchairs should be single?" He saw his son roll his eyes. "Do you realize you're not even making sense?"
Gibbs glared at his father. "If this is your idea of a pep talk, it sucks."
Jack laughed. "How do you feel having me around? Does it bother you?"
He thought about it for a few seconds and shook his head. "Not really."
"What do you think it would take to get you to reach that point with your wife? Because right now, your rejection is killing her. Anyone could see that, even me. All she wants is to help you through this."
Gibbs sighed. "Dad…"
"Don't 'dad' me. If the worst happens and this is permanent, she's going to be your best ally, your best weapon. I'd hate to see you push her so far away that you lose her. Are you prepared for that?" He saw by the panicked expression on his son's face that he wasn't.
"I wouldn't let that happen."
"So what's your plan? You just want to push her to the brink and then say, 'oops, sorry,' and think it will be okay after that? How much do you expect her to take?"
Gibbs sighed. "I don't know. It's like I'm looking down at myself, watching me push her away and I can't do anything to stop myself. But the thought that she'd be better off without me -"
"Hold on," Jack said, his eyes widening. "Wait a second. Where the heck is that coming from? Are you pushing her away on purpose because you think she'd be better off without you? Are you insane? You don't even know if this is permanent yet!"
"But what if it is, Dad? Doesn't she deserve to be with someone who -"
"She deserves to be with the man she loves. And for whatever reason, that man is you. All this stuff in your head is just noise. You have to push it aside because it's going to destroy your marriage - and you. Instead, listen to your heart. What is it telling you?"
In the hallway, Jenny found a nurse and asked to speak with Jethro's doctor. After about five minutes, a man walked up to her. She was surprised by how young he was.
"Mrs. Gibbs?" Jenny nodded. "I'm Dr. Michaels. I'm the lead doctor on your husband's case. What can I do for you?"
"I'd like to get him transferred to Bethesda as soon as possible. How would we go about making that happen?"
He explained the process to Jenny, and they got the paperwork started. Just as she was finishing, Jack approached her. He took Julia out of her arms and kissed Jenny on the temple. "Go to him."
Jenny was a little nervous by the suggestion but the smile on his face immediately put her at ease and she smiled back. "Thank you, Jack!" She squeezed his arm and kissed her daughter before practically running back to his room. She stopped when she got to the doorway, holding her breath. She slowly walked towards him, their eyes locked on each other.
When she got close enough, he reached his hand up, taking his thumb and caressing under her eye to remove a tear that had formed. "I am so sorry, honey." That was it. More tears came streaming down her face. He swallowed hard. "Can you forgive me?"
She quickly threw off her shoes and climbed into his bed, throwing her arm across his chest and gripping his shoulder. He held her tightly against him. "I love you so much, Jethro. Don't ever push me away like that again. You were breaking my heart."
Her words burned, but he knew he'd feel the same if she ever did that to him. He threaded his fingers in her hair, kissing the top of her head. "I'll try not to but I can't promise that everything will be fine now. I've got so many horrible thoughts running through my head, and I'm not great at pushing them aside."
She scooted herself up closer to his face, leaning on her elbow so she could see into his eyes. "Talk to me. Tell me what you're feeling. But when you shut me out, I feel lost and alone and I'm liable to do crazy things when that happens."
"What kind of crazy things?"
"Let's just say you should be happy we weren't home because I probably would have torched your boat."
He looked at her in shock. "Seriously?"
"No, but it sounded good."
He chuckled a bit, the first real release like that since this whole thing happened and it made him realize his dad was absolutely right. He needs his wife to get through this. "I love you so much, Jen. But I'm scared to death right now."
She nodded. "I know. I am too. But we can handle anything together. It's when we're apart that things…" she trailed off, not wanting to even consider it.
"Did you ever think that life was going too great for us? That something was bound to happen to screw things up?"
She caressed his face. "I refuse to believe the universe works that way. It doesn't get us back together, allow us to survive Kort, give us Julia and then decide we have to have something horrible happen. I can't believe that. I won't believe it."
Gibbs wanted to trust her way of seeing things. He looked in her eyes, trying to draw from her strength.
Jenny misunderstood why he was looking at her and thought he wanted to kiss. She leaned down and covered his lips with her own. She caressed his face as she did this, trying to coax his lips apart so she could deepen it. When he wouldn't let her she backed away. "What is it?" She worried when he wouldn't answer her or look her in the eye. "Jethro?"
He finally looked into her eyes again. "What if…" His eyes began to well up.
Her own eyes widened as she realized what thoughts were probably running through his head. "Are you worried about making love?"
He ran his hands from her neck down to her breasts. "You are a very sexual woman. I'm touching your incredibly sexy body and you can check, but I don't think anything is happening down there." She reached her hand downward, and he could tell by the look on her face that he was right.
The disappointed look on his face broke her heart. "First, you have a lot of drugs that are being pumped inside of you so I wouldn't judge anything right now. Second, I think we've proved this past month that not only are we far more than just sex, but that we're still incredible together even without it. Or have you been secretly wanting to leave me because I haven't been able to make love?" He shot her a look that asked if she was crazy. "So why do you think I'd feel any different? The way you caress my body, kiss my neck or look into my eyes satisfies me more than what any other man could even hope to do." She could see him struggling to believe her. "Even if the worst happens, you are more than enough man for me, Jethro Gibbs, just the way you are. In fact, you're everything." She could feel his heart racing next to hers.
Gibbs reached his hand into her hair again, bringing her head down so their lips could meet. This time he was the one trying to part her lips, wanting to deepen their kiss. She immediately granted him entry, their hunger for each other overtaking them.
