"Carly, this one's foolproof," Freddie assured the brunette.
"Freddie, last time your finger squirted blood all over my counter. Can't you do that thing on the patio at least?"
Freddie had just gotten a new home bio-scanner from his grandparents, and was eager to test it out.
"No, I need an audience."
"Than do it for Sam. She's your girlfriend, and the sight of blood doesn't gross her out."
"She's sleeping still," Freddie replied. "Come on, please?"
"Fine," Carly sighed. "Tell me all about your genetic make up."
"Well," Freddie said, pricking his finger and rubbing the blood on the pad attached to his laptop. "Apparently, I'm-"
"Freddie! Your finger again!" Carly exclaimed, watching blood spurt all over her counter. She quickly grabbed him a paper towel.
"Thanks," Freddie said, covering his bloody finger. "Man, you'd think that with those new vitamins-"
"Just wipe up your blood," Carly told him, cringing at the dark red liquid. "Hey, look who's finally up."
"It's only eleven," Sam defended, grabbing herself a muffin from the box by the toaster. "Hey is that blood?"
"Yes. Your boyfriend felt the need to get his DNA all over the kitchen I just cleaned yesterday after your little French toast incident."
"You mean I missed him bleeding? I would've woken up for that!"
"It's like a giant hug," Freddie said sarcastically.
"This could use icing," Sam said, taking a bite out of the muffin. "Too bad I finished it up on that French toast…oh well, I'll grab something when I go out?"
"Where are you going?" Carly asked.
"To meet Amanda at the Groovy Smoothie, wanna come?"
"No thanks. Amanda kind of…grosses me out. No offense, Freddie."
"Eh, it's true," he shrugged. "You remember that we're supposed to meet my grandpa at the restaurant at seven, right?"
"Yup!" she yelled as she slammed the door behind her.
"Wow, Sam seems to be getting along pretty well with your family," Carly said to Freddie.
"Yeah, her and my grandma had an hour long conversation about things that they hated last night," he said. "And her and Amanda have been talking a lot. Of course, it's usually about new ways to cause me pain, which is why I found jalapeno juice in my toothpaste this morning…And then my grandpa is taking us out to dinner tonight because he doesn't think Sam can actually eat a whole ham in under fifteen minutes."
"I hope he didn't place a bet on that," Carly laughed.
"Do you want to come with us tonight? My grandpa told me I could bring a couple of friends besides Sam, and I just asked Gibby."
"Thanks, but I have a date tonight. Finally."
"Really, with who?"
"His name is Brian, and we met yesterday at the Groovy Smoothie. We both ordered a Strawberry-Kiwi Tornado," she said dreamily. "I was telling Sam all about him."
"Well, have fun then," Freddie said. "Hey, I wonder if my finger stopped bleeding…" he removed the paper towel and instantly, blood began spurting out of his finger. Again.
…..
"So, did you see the new guy mom's dating?" Sam asked her sister later that night. She had just gotten back from the restaurant with Freddie and his grandfather. She had, of course, proven his grandfather wrong and eaten an entire ham.
"The one with the back hair problem? Yeah. He seems nice," Melanie said, flipping through the channels of the television. "Except he leaves hair everywhere he sits."
"Better then the guy who had those ten inch finger nails," Sam pointed out.
Melanie's phone went off, and she looked at her text message. "Oh, it's Dylan! Oh my God, Sam, he wants to meet me at Moonbucks!"
"I'll alert the media," Sam said, grabbing the remote from her sister.
"Sam, that's the place where we had our first cup of coffee! You know what this means? He might be asking me out!"
"Uh huh, can you keep the squealing down? I want to see if this guy's smarter than a monkey…"
Ignoring her sister, Melanie jumped up and grabbed her jacket and headed out the door, just as Carly was about to put her key in the lock on the other side.
"Where's she off to?" Carly asked.
"She claims Dylan's about to officially ask her out. Wow, that's one smart chimpanzee; he knew the capital of Burkina Faso!"
"My life sucks," Carly moaned, collapsing on the couch.
"Bad date?" Sam asked, pausing the show.
"Well, it started off really good. Brian came here around six to pick me up, and we made small talk in the car on the way to Petrazini's, but when we got there, we had nothing to left to talk about! We just sort of stared at each other the whole time!"
"Did you get the seafood alfredo? Petrazini's has the best seafood alfredo-"
"Focus!" Carly exclaimed angrily.
"Sorry," Sam said. "So, this guy was a dud. You're hot; I bet by next week, you'll have another date lined up."
"Well…the thing is, I agreed to go on another date with him next Saturday."
"What? Why would you do that if he was totally boring?"
"Because, he's so-sweet," Carly replied. "I-I couldn't say no when he asked me. Besides, it was our first date; maybe he was just nervous. Anyway, I was thinking…it might be a little less awkward if we had another couple with us…maybe one with a nice brunette and spunky blonde?"
"Spencer and Ella? Dude, why would you want to go on a double date with your brother and-"
"I was talking about you and Freddie!"
"Oh. No."
"No? Sam, why not?"
"Freddie and I don't do double dates. It's weird."
"How's it weird? It's two couples going out for some dinner!"
"Yeah, but-"
"Come on, just this once," Carly begged. "Please? I'll do your laundry for a month."
"Melanie already does my laundry."
"I'll buy you smoothies until May."
"I have Freddie for that."
"I'll-I'll give you the key to the mini fridge Spencer keeps in his bedroom."
Sam's face lit up. "You mean the one where he hides his Canadian bacon in?"
"That's the one."
"Alright, I'll do it."
