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In some dark corner of his mind, Edward had always known. And that's what hurt the most, the knowledge that had he taken the time to do a little soul searching, he would have uncovered the truths his mother had spelled out to him. By deliberately blinding himself to reality, Edward had built his life on inconsistent beliefs, moulding his expectations to inexistent role models.

Edward felt lost and unsure, for his every identity and dreams hadn't survived Esme's revelations. Deprived of his illusions, Edward no longer knew what he wanted from life. His only certainty was the need to distance himself from the man he had become. The magic formula to happiness, the one he had dutifully followed, was nothing more than a lie. He needed guidance because he truly couldn't fathom how to make a woman happy. How to make the woman he loved happy. How to make Bella happy.

Just like that the veil that fogged his mind was lifted. It was about her, everything was about her... the rage... the drinking... Tanya... the capitulation to therapy... the urge to listen to Esme... It was all a reaction to losing her.

Edward didn't have answers, only questions. He had nothing to teach, only to learn. He had much to atone for, but no notion of how to go about it. Tainted as it was, he had only his love to offer. It was time to earn her love or lose her for good.


AN: Don't get too mad... Next, Edward and Bella talk. I promise! Thank you for reading.