Happy Release Eve! Tomorrow ME3 is released and I shall have my hands upon it and so we can continue this epic tale. I'm looking forward to seeing exactly what the wonderful people of Bioware have in store for us all, especially where Shepard/Garrus is concerned.

Chapter inspired by Christina Perri's Jar of Hearts


Jar of Hearts

"Where is she?"

The voice of the concerned Turian caught everyone's attention on the CIC. Even Joker swiveled his chair to see Garrus frantically searching for his brunette commanding officer.

At last, the redhead near the galaxy map spoke, her voice calm and collected. "The Commander is in the med bay, Officer Vakarian. Admiral Hackett just finished debriefing her on the mission she undertook."

Not waiting around to thank her, Garrus practically bolted back into the elevator. Of course, none of the crew could fault him for being concerned. Two days ago Shepard had gone out of contact for a mission deep into Batarian space and when she'd resumed contact, it had been shortly before the destruction of a Mass Relay.

As the elevator descended, Garrus shifted nervously, his ice blue eyes glued to the doors. Shepard had refused to tell him exactly what she was up to for fear that it would put him at risk. Now the poor Turian remained in the dark with only the knowledge that Shepard was in the medical bay.

Once the doors opened he sprinted out, catching Chakwas as she exited the medical bay. She blinked up at the disheveled Turian, clearly startled at his appearance. Chest heaving, Garrus stared down at the human before him. "Can I see her?"

"Officer Vakaraian, she's gone through an extremely traumatic event…" The doctor shook her head slowly. "Shepard needs time to rest…"

She paused, her gaze finally meeting Garrus' ice blue eyes. The concern in the Turian's face was unmistakable, even across species. With a sigh, she stepped aside and smiled wryly. "I'm going to step away for a bit. The door isn't locked. I'm going to say don't go in there, but I won't back to check."

Slightly surprised, Garrus was still as the doctor strode towards the living quarters. As soon as she was out of sight the Turian darted into the med bay, securing the door behind him. Erin Shepard sat on the last bed in the bay and as Garrus approached, she turned to look at him, clearly not expecting his appearance.

He approached, quiet for his size. "Hey."

"Hey…" Shepard appeared to be all right. A few dark bruises appeared on her arms, but even those were fading quickly. And yet something was wrong…there seemed to be a hastily erected wall of calm erected around Shepard. It didn't take long for Garrus to confirm this.

Sliding onto the bed, Garrus gently rested a talon on his mate's shoulder. "Shep, are you okay?"

Ocean blue eyes wide, Erin gazed at the Turain beside her for only a heartbeat before practically throwing herself into his arms, strong sobs shaking her shoulders. "Garrus, what have I done? I just killed 300,000 people!"

Many years ago Garrus might have been shocked to the point of silence, but by this point he was slightly more prepared for something like this. Enveloping Shepard in his arms, the Turian's chest seemed to hum. "Shepard, I know you and I know that you're not the kind of person to just wipe out a whole system without a reason. What happened down there?"

And like the floodgates had been opened Shepard managed to choke out the story between sobs. She had infiltrated the Batarian prison and rescued Hackett's friend, Doctor Kenson, who had found a Reaper artifact claimed that the Reapers were going to use the Mass Relay in that system to jump to other points in the galaxy. Somehow Kenson had become indoctrinated by the artifact and drugged Shepard for two days before she managed to escape and crash a massive asteroid into the relay, destroying it and delaying the invasion temporarily but at the cost of her military career; Hackett had hinted that she was most likely going to be court martialed for her actions.

Throughout, Garrus sat in a shocked silence. He had always known his bond mate was strong and resourceful, but nothing like this. Now he understood what Chakwas had meant when she mentioned a traumatic event…Shepard could only stay strong for so long before she broke. Long after her story concluded, the brunette trembled in Garrus' firm grasp, occasionally broken by a fresh round of tears until at last, Shepard looked up at the Turian beside her, red-eyed and out of tears to cry.

Gingerly, the blue eyed Turian brushed a few strands of hair away from Shepard's face. "You did what was right. Not everyone will see it that way, but I know what you did was right."

"But what about the Alliance?" Whispered Shepard, her voice husky. "I've always been with them…what if they discharge me?"

At this, Garrus couldn't help but chuckle as he leaned forward to press his forehead against Shepard's. "Then you can always join the Turian military. Or at least try. No matter what happens Shepard, I'm going to be here."

A heavy silence fell between the pair, which caused Garrus to pull back, his mandibles fluttering into a worried expression. Although she was weary and emotionally drained, Shepard met Garrus' inquisitive gaze with unwavering eyes. "Garrus, I'm disbanding my crew. Jacob and Miranda are returning to Cerberus, the others are going on their own…I've already spoken to some of them."

Opening his mouth to protest, Shepard placed a hand over it. "This isn't negotiable Garrus; you're leaving. If you're on my crew, they'll call you in to testify against me. I won't make you do that to me. I can give you passage to the Citadel or wherever you need to go before I have to report to Earth."

Horrified, Garrus now felt like he would be the one to cry. After all they had been through, Shepard was just leaving him? Somehow it felt like he had always known this would happen but…

"Hey." As if realizing how harsh she had come across as, Shepard leaned forward, her hand encompassing Garrus'. "What I promised to you still holds true. I will wear your ring and I will stay with you. But…"

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Garrus started to comprehend. "You have to do what's right by you. I think I understand…not that I like it."

Over the next few days, Shepard ferried crew members across the galaxy. Jacob and Miranda she dropped at a very nondescript location where another Cerberus vessel would retrieve them for reassignment. Tali was delivered to the Migrant Fleet, Grunt to Tuchanka, Zaeed to Omega, Samara to Illium, and Mordin back to a waiting Salarian ship so he could rejoin the Special Tasks Group. Jack and Leigon were dropped off at random points of their choosing, so Shepard didn't ask too many questions.

The last stop was the Citadel, where Shepard said her goodbyes to Kasumi and Thane. While Kasumi vanished into the teeming crowds of the Citadel, Shepard stood aside with Thane, her heart heavy. Although he had done surprisingly well under Mordin's care, both Shepard and Thane knew that his condition was worsening.

Shifting from foot to foot, Shepard offered a small smile and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "I guess this is goodbye."

The drell nodded and cast a glance over Shepard's shoulder at where Garrus was still speaking with Joker. "All is well between you and Officer Vakarian?"

A dusty rose blush crept into Shepard's cheeks. "He's not happy that we have to leave, but we have to do what we must."

Satisfied that Garrus was distracted, Thane embraced Shepard, his voice dropping low. "By grace given me by the Goddess Arashu, I bid her divine protection to you, my warrior-angel, my Siha, to succeed in your destiny. To light your path through the coming darkness. To give you hope, when all seems lost."

"Thank you." Muttered Shepard, bowing her head. "I hope that we can meet again."

Bowing low, Thane took one last look at Shepard, his dark eyes seeming to pierce to the Spectre's core. "I will await you across the sea."

And with that, Thane vanished into the crowds of the Citadel. Shepard knew he was going to be with his son, Kolyat, but it was still a little sad to see him go, especially knowing that he might never return.

"He's off to find his son then?" Garrus' voice was quiet as he approached.

Shepard turned, her heart clenching. She had known that this would be the hardest goodbye to make, even if she fully intended to come back for Garrus. And yet…looking into his baby blue eyes just made Shepard want to call the whole thing off. They could take the Normandy and hide in the Terminus systems…from there they could fight the Reapers and live relatively peacefully. And yet the brunette Spectre knew that wouldn't be right.

As if he knew, Garrus fluttered his mandibles into a smile. "I understand why you're doing this…and I don't think I'd like you as much if you didn't."

"Do you have a place to stay?" Shepard inquired quickly, wanting to keep him talking for as long as possible if only to put off the inevitable.

Wryly fluttering his mandibles, Garrus nodded. "Yeah…an old friend of mine from C-Sec is offering me a place until I can find my own."

An awkward silence fell between the pair. At last, Shepard closed the distance between the pair, hovering just inches from the Turian. Each seemed to search the other's features hungrily, striving to engrave them into their memory.

Standing on tip-toe, Shepard pressed her forehead to Garrus', her deep chocolate locks providing a pleasant contrast to his tan plates. Ocean blue eyes open, she met Garrus' gaze with a fierce determination. "I'm coming back for you. I promise. And I always keep my promises."

Sorrow reflected in Garrus' eyes as he pulled away. "I'll be here when you call."

Hesitantly, Shepard backed up into the Normandy, keeping her gaze locked on Garrus until the doors closed, separating the pair by thick steel plating and millions of miles of space. Only after the Normandy had soared away from dock did Garrus allow himself to turn and head through to C-Sec to meet his friend. Even as he strode away, the Turian had the feeling that part of his heart had been left aboard the Normandy.