Disclaimer: I don't own the Lord of the Rings or the Hobbit!
A/N: Good night!
I'm hoping to write one more chapter for you all tonight and then I'll see what I can do tomorrow. I've got a business plan to work on that's due on Wednesday. But that's what Tuesdays are for. (Look in the dictionary for "procrastination" and you'll see a college student). Hopefully this story will run smoothly for the rest of the way.
Enjoy! Please review!
Engine Room Hijinks
Pounding footsteps alerted Thorin to a new presence in the cargo bay. Ùhùrud gave a curious coo as he ducked out from under her belly where he'd been working. Making his way around the Eagle, he stepped out into the open just in time to see Nori storm his way. The Dwarf's star-shaped hair had somehow fallen out of its shape. A yellowing bruise decorated his forehead and he looked both frazzled and furious.
"Nori," Thorin greeted as the Dwarf approached him. "How did the apology go? Are you and Bilbo on better terms?"
Nori didn't even bother stopping to talk. He stormed straight for the gangway's stairwell. "Don't ask," he snarled.
"Nori?" Thorin called after him, frowning. "What happened? Did Bilbo say something?"
Nori's shoulders stiffened. Whirling around, he clenched his fists at his sides. "Never trust a Hobbit," he shouted furiously. "Do you know what that brat did?" Struck dumb, Thorin shook his head slowly. "He threw me out of a tree after I specifically told him not to! Never trust a Hobbit!" His tirade done, Nori turned and stormed up the stairs.
Thorin watched him disbelief. He'd never seen Nori react this badly to falling before. Not even when Kili had accidentally shoved him off a cliff. A throat cleared just behind him. Turning, Thorin spotted Bilbo standing beside Kamikaze. The Hobbit didn't even look insulted by Nori's words. If anything he looked just plain amused with a hint of victory mixed in.
"You threw him out of a tree?" Thorin said, raising an eyebrow.
Bilbo gave him a lopsided grin. "Honestly, I thought he'd hold on." Snorting, Thorin shook his head. Bilbo spread his hands. "What? He's a thief. I figured he'd have the sense to hold on when I shook the tree."
"Not all of us are comfortable with heights," Thorin pointed out. Turning back to his Eagle, he ducked back under the belly to continue working on the wiring. Bilbo followed him.
"Nori spends a disproportionate amount of time in air vents," the Hobbit said, and Thorin laughed. "You'd think he'd be comfortable in trees."
"Air vents are enclosed," Thorin said. Grabbing a wire, he checked the frayed end. Ùhùrud whooped at him as though it tickled. "There is a small chance of falling out of them unless something breaks."
"So you're saying trees are too open for Nori to be comfortable?"
"Aye."
Bilbo fell silent for a moment. Thorin figured he'd gone and continued he work, banging his head against the belly of the ship when Bilbo spoke next. "Why didn't I think of that?" Groaning, Thorin rubbed the back of his head. It pulsed like a drum. "Thorin, are you all right?"
"I am fine," Thorin said through gritted teeth. "How many branches did Nori hit on the way down?" Ducking back out from under the ship, he straightened up to face Bilbo. The Hobbit looked contemplative. "It might tell you how long Nori will be mad at you."
"I don't think he actually hit any," Bilbo said slowly. Thorin didn't doubt him there. Nori was skilled at dodging objects in falls. "He's got the grace of a cat."
"Did he land on his feet?" Thorin asked with a small smile.
Bilbo grinned at him. "Exactly like one," he said. "Hands and knees and he managed to look insulted at the same time. I didn't know he could do that."
"Nori is gifted," Thorin commented. Crossing his arms, he leaned back against Ùhùrud. "What were you two doing up in the tree anyway?"
"We were in the Solar Conservatory," Bilbo said with a shrug. Thorin gave him a disbelieving look. "I went there to think, Nori turned up and asked if we could talk, and the next thing I knew Frodo and Galadriel were heading our way. We didn't have time run anywhere else so we climbed a tree."
Thorin shook his head, laughing to himself. "And I thought Fili and Kili were the troublemakers," he said. Bilbo wrinkled his nose and made an insulted noise. Thorin grinned at him. "When it has been you and Nori all this time."
"I'm not the one who instigates these things," Bilbo argued, crossing his own arms and lifting his chin. "Ninety-five percent of the time it's Nori."
"And the other five it is you."
"Or Bofur."
"Bofur is not prone to taking engines apart when he is bored," Thorin said. Bilbo paused. A sheepish expression crossed his face and he refused to meet Thorin's eyes. Thorin laughed again. "You are impossible, Bilbo Baggins." From across the cargo bay Sparrow gave an agreeing sound.
Bilbo glared at his Eagle who just chortled back. "Traitor," he muttered under his breath. Sparrow gave a scree of disagreement.
"A traitor is someone who deceives their friends for their own gain," Thorin said, earning himself a disgruntled glare. "Sparrow was just doing what she thought was best for you."
"Speaking of what's best for me," Bilbo said, and Thorin's heart sank with the tone. The Hobbit gave him a hopeful look. "Any chance you'll give me my stuff back yet? I don't like being out of the loop." Thorin folded his arms across his chest. Bilbo's lower lip jutted out in a pout with the silent answer. "Why not?"
"Because Galadriel thinks it is a bad idea," Thorin answered firmly. "She told me herself to hide your gadgets."
Bilbo glared at him. "This isn't going to end well for anyone the longer you hide them."
Thorin shrugged. "It will not be for much longer," he assured his friend. "Just until the Fellowship is gone."
"Which should be after tomorrow," Bilbo said, brightening up. Thorin frowned at him, wondering how the Hobbit could possibly know that. "I heard Frodo and Galadriel speaking in the conservatory. Frodo's thinking about leaving the Fellowship. He wants them to protect their own homes."
"And Galadriel is supporting him?" Thorin said in disbelief, dropping his arms. Bilbo nodded. "That is insane. He will not last a day on his own."
"That's what Nori said." Bilbo nodded. "Which is why I need to talk to Galadriel tonight, set it up so that Frodo won't be on his own. I'll need to keep a careful eye on him."
"At least make sure Estel goes with him," Thorin requested.
Bilbo cocked his head thoughtfully then shrugged. "I'll see what I can do," he promised. "By the way, you might be invited to dinner tomorrow."
"Dinner?"
"With the Fellowship. Frodo's going to announce their leaving. I've got a feeling Galadriel's going to want you there."
"That's going to end well," Thorin said dryly, and Bilbo chuckled in agreement.
O.o.O
The door to the engine room screeched open, slamming into its cradle. Thrush gave a surprised cheep and shot under the table. Bofur didn't even bother looking up. He knew exactly who stood in the doorway, puffing. Each member of the crew had a certain quality in the way they moved when they were angry. For Dwalin it was feeling like you were about to killed in one swing. Thorin moved in a way that suggested you needed to get out of his path or else be shoved aside.
Nori, though, was different. When the thief got angry he lost all his sense of sneakiness. His footsteps were heavy, each pounding against the floor. He huffed with each breath like a winded rhinoceros and the very room seemed to gain a strange aura. It was akin to being locked in a cage with angry wolverine, one you wanted to escape as soon as you could.
"Apology not go well?" Bofur asked without looking up. All he got in response was a snarl. Something unhitched and the door slammed shut with such a force it shook the room. Thrush cooed worriedly. "Mind the door."
"Mind yourself," Nori snapped back. Pausing in his work, Bofur glanced over his shoulder. His friend hovered in the doorway, his fingers twitching. Nori's eyes were dark with anger but there was also annoyance in there too.
"Top cupboard to your left," Bofur said. He returned to his work, using a small screwdriver set to fiddle with several crossed wires. The cupboard behind him cracked open. Objects clattered against each other and then the door slammed shut again. "Please don't break the door," Bofur said. "Bifur'll have my head if ya break it."
"He'll have your head anyway," Nori muttered. His heavy footsteps echoed off the grated floor as he moved to stand beside Bofur. The engineer had barely a second to move his work before his friend hopped up to sit on the table, stress ball in his hands. His fingers were already deftly working the material.
"What went wron'?" Bofur asked, setting his screwdrivers down.
Nori sat back against the wall, squeezing the stress ball Bofur saved just for times like this. "He pushed me out of a tree."
Bofur blinked in surprise. "Who? Bilbo?"
Nori gave him a dirty look. "Who else?" he demanded. "Of course it was Bilbo, you idiot."
"Oi, I'm just tryin' ta help," Bofur warned. "So don't snap at me." Nori mimicked his words in a nasty undertone and Bofur grabbed a screwdriver to jab in his direction. "I've got sharp tools." Nori dropped the act immediately, shifting away from Bofur who put the screwdriver back down. "So what happened? And don't use rude words."
Nori inhaled deeply, squeezing the stress ball in one hand. "I went to the Solar Conservatory to talk to Bilbo," he said. Bofur nodded for him to continue when the thief paused. "I'd just found him when Galadriel and Frodo came by so we had to quick climb a tree."
"And that's when he pushed you?" Bofur asked. Nori shook his head. "All right, what happened next?"
"We eavesdropped on Galadriel and Frodo for a little while." Bofur gave Nori an exasperated look. The thief scowled at him. "It wasn't our fault! They were standing right under our tree. Galadriel even saw us." Bofur motioned for him to continue. Nori sighed, banging his head against the wall. "So we talked, Bilbo made plans, and then I apologized to him."
"I'm guessin' this isn't the part where he pushed you out?" Bofur asked, and Nori shook his head. "Then when did he do it? I'm getting' confused here."
Nori scratched his forehead where the yellowing bruise had already begun to fade. "Bilbo shook the tree. I told him to stop and he did."
Those words alone told Bofur where this story was going. "Uh oh."
"Now you see," Nori said gravely.
"You egged him on," Bofur said. Dropping his face into his hands, he spoke through his fingers. "Why'd ya egg him on, Nori? Ya know how he gets."
Nori threw the stress ball at him. It bounced off Bofur's head and rolled away. "I didn't egg him on!"
"Ya told him ta stop," Bofur pointed out, lifting his face. Nori watched him with a furious expression. "And after he accepted yer apology."
"Why are you saying this like it's my fault?" Nori demanded. "You're supposed to be on my side."
"I'm not on anyone's side," Bofur snapped back. "I'm just tryin' ta stop ya from startin' a war that'll ruin this whole ship."
"Then what are you getting at?"
"Yer apology," Bofur shouted. Nori froze, his mouth hanging open with a dumb look. Standing from his chair, Bofur moved to fetch the stress ball. He tossed it back to Nori who caught it with deft fingers. "Did Bilbo forgive you?"
"Aye," Nori said immediately, rolling the ball between his fingers. And then he paused. Realization dawned on his face. "Ooh."
"Exactly," Bofur said with a firm nod.
After the realization came the horror. "Oh no," Nori said softly. The stress ball dropped from his fingers. "I called him a short, pointy-eared, tree-loving bastard."
Bofur paused at that. He stared at Nori in disbelief until he couldn't hide it anymore. Wrapping his arms around his stomach, he burst into laughter. The thief jerked out of his shock and glared at him.
"Why are you laughing?" he demanded. "This isn't funny! Bilbo was being playful and I insulted him!" Bofur couldn't stop laughing no matter how hard he tried. "Stop it! Shut up!" The stress ball hit his head again.
Straightening up, Bofur wiped a tear away. "I'm sorry," he said. "But that's got ta be the funniest thin' ya ever called him. What'd he say?"
Nori crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't know." The words were spoken in an offended tone. "I left the conservatory as soon as I'd said that. And I told Thorin not to trust Hobbits."
"Which he'll ignore." Finally getting his laughing under control, Bofur returned to his seat at the workbench. Nori shifted nervously on the spot. "Ya'll be fine. If anythin' Bilbo probably found it pretty funny."
"You think?"
"Since ya weren't the one ta push him out of the tree, probably." Grabbing his tools, Bofur turned back to his work. "If it'd been the other way around then he'd be pissed at ya."
This seemed to cheer Nori up. The Dwarf swung his legs back and forth, his demeanor changing entirely. Catastrophe averted. "You're probably right. He usually gets this way after accepting an apology."
"Exactly," Bofur said dismissively as he attempted to focus on his work. Nori fell silent, continuing to swing his legs back and forth. Bofur managed a few minutes of work before his friend butted in.
"You're still working on that robotic arm?"
Sighing, Bofur straightened up in his seat. He fixed Nori with a stern glare. "Aye, I am," he said sharply. "And I'll continue workin' on it until the end of time."
"How old's that design?" Nori asked curiously. "Twenty . . . thirty years?"
"Forty-two," Bofur corrected. "I've got almost every other part of the design down, just not the nerves."
"Huh." Nori pulled a leg up onto the table so he could rest his elbow on it. "You'd probably need a Rohirrim for that. And they're not usually willing to give up their ex-nerves designs."
"Don't I know it," Bofur sighed wistfully.
The external nerves, ex-nerves for short, were a form of medical technology that had been designed by the Rohirrim and they kept the secret to themselves. The most anyone knew about them was limited: they were connected to live nerves in the body and were generally used where nerves had been damaged beyond repair. The brain continued to get information that assisted in making sure the body worked as it should. Bofur had been hoping to get the designs for years but he'd never had such luck.
"Imagine if you finally met a Rohirrim with ex-nerves," Nori said. "You could finally give that arm to someone who could really use it."
O.o.O
If any of the Fellowship had noticed Frodo's absence during the day they didn't mention anything about it at dinner. The rain had stopped by the time late evening rolled around so they ate around a fire instead of in the pavilion. Frodo found himself relaxing in the presence of his friends despite his plans to betray them. He couldn't help but laugh along with the Tall Folk as Merry and Pippin fell into an argument over trivial matters anyone from outside the Shire System couldn't understand.
The light mood continued on until after dinner when an Elf approached their group. Merry and Pippin stopped their play-fighting almost immediately. The Elf bowed low, speaking in fluent Sindarin to both Aragorn and Legolas. Frodo watched quietly as Aragorn responded likewise. The Elf gave another bow then retreated from their area. Aragorn and Legolas exchanged confused looks.
"What was that all about?" Merry asked curiously. Reaching over, he pinched Pippin hard on the leg to snap him back from the Elf's mind. His younger cousin yelped and leapt aside, rubbing his leg.
Aragorn frowned thoughtfully, scratching at his chin. "We've been invited to dine with Galadriel tomorrow evening."
"Galadriel?" Sam perked up at the mention of the name. "Why does she want to eat with us?"
"He did not say," Legolas answered, looking just as confused as Aragorn.
For a brief moment Frodo considered telling the Fellowship he knew why but he held his tongue. It wouldn't do him any good to bring their spirits down while they were all in a good mood.
"I for one wouldn't mind seeing the Lady again," Gimli commented from his spot on the other side of the fire. Legolas smiled. The two had become fast friends during either stay on Lothlórien. No one could explain this strange miracle but no one questioned it either. It was just a miracle the Elf and Dwarf were finally getting along.
"Maybe she just wants to talk," Pippin said. All eyes turned on him. Cocking his head, he Read the atmosphere. "What? I could be right, yeah?"
"And you could be dead wrong," Merry pointed out. "I don't think Galadriel has time to be talking to us. She's got a city to run."
"Pip could be right," Boromir said helpfully. Pippin beamed at him. "She might just want to spend some time with us." Even as he said this, though, he looked extremely doubtful about the very idea.
Aragorn shrugged. "No point worrying about it," he said. "We'll see soon enough tomorrow."
Frodo shifted uncomfortably on the spot. It hurt his heart to hide these secrets from the others but he couldn't bring himself to tell them. They would either argue that it wasn't time to leave or fall into a quiet, moping mood for the rest of their stay. Frodo didn't want either of that to happen.
Glancing out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Pippin watching him. The Hobbit had an expression that was both curious and confused at the same time. Frodo turned away. Galadriel had told him she would place a wall around the idea in his head so Pippin wouldn't be able to read it. She hadn't said anything about Pippin noticing it but Frodo supposed the Reader was bound to notice a strange empty space. Or maybe it was more like running headlong into a brick wall. Either way it seemed to irritate Pippin more than usual. He stared hard enough to make Frodo squirm.
"Mr. Frodo, are you all right?" Sam asked. Thankful for the distraction, Frodo turned his attention on his friend. Sam watched him with a worried expression. "You haven't eaten much."
Frodo smiled sadly. "I'm fine, Sam," he said. "I'm just not all that hungry." Sam looked doubtful but didn't press the matter.
Frodo sat back against the trunk of a tree to watch as Merry distracted Pippin once more. Their argument fired back up and soon the two were rolling on the ground while Aragorn shook his head and Boromir tried to pull them apart. It made his heart ache.
A/N: What did you think?
Castor laughed hard when she read this chapter for me. :) I was so glad to finally get some humor into the story that didn't feel weird and actually fit in . . . I think. I'm hoping Frodo's not being too annoying. I really want to avoid creating him as that sort of character. :/
Oddly I've changed my writing font on my computer. Normally I write with Times New Roman but today I started using Verdana. For some reason it just looks so much more appealing to me . . . I have no idea why I felt the need to tell you that.
Here's a checklist of what we have left to do:
-Farewell to Lórien
-Sarn Gebir
-The Argonath
-Amon Hen
-The Breaking of the Fellowship
Almost there!
