To love an Ancient: An Aeris and Sephiroth story
7780 words
Chapter 53
To love or hate an Ancient? Part 1
Author's notes
Thanks for the reviews you guys. *pauses to check hit rates and the rest of you other anonymous readers! I am glad that none of you were too angered that Aer and Seph were not in the previous chapter. Due to your kindness, I am gonna give you all a special gift...dundundun! "A whole chapter dedicated to the amorous couple!" Hears a few Hurrahs in the b/ground. Yep, Aer and Seph are gonna hog the limelight this time.
I am so happy! Final Fantasy AC has finally been released! Oh I can't contain my excitement! Sephy! Aeris! Vinny! Yazoo And Kady! They all look so beautiful! I think I'll start looking up for some FFAC fanfics. lol.
Ahem...
On with the fic!
By the time the sun waned to dusk, Sephiroth was more than ready to snap. After encountering an annoying mass of weak monsters that seemed to multiply after every battle, and suffering beneath a zealous sun, then having to bear a torrent of endless nagging questions from your sole companion was enough to make anyone crack. But what made the day even worse was that same companion had captured his attention to the point that she made him agitated at even by the most simplest of things. Sephiroth tried to focus his mind to a point of emptiness, and block out all interruptions; but it was a impossible feat. It seemed nothing wanted to go right today. His initial plan was to catch a wild chocobo since it would mean that they could cross the western continent in much better time. However it seemed that it certainly had not been a good year for chocobo breeding. Heck; the swordsman could not even find any signs of chocobo tracks!
It was practically infuriating because the swordsman knew that they could have both arrived at Nibelheim before nightfall if they had acquired such transport. But alas, fate seemed to be mocking him for every stretch of mile he walked. It wasn't like the exercise bothered him; of course his body welcomed such physical exertion. It was just so very irritating that nothing ever seemed to go as planned. He was almost tempted to backtrack to the town of Gongaga and 'acquire' a mode of transport. But at that moment, the swordsman was far too annoyed to walk the long three hours back in the direction he had came; not to forget that he did not wish to hear a certain Cetra's incessant whining on why they were going backwards. No, Sephiroth was certainly not in the mood to deal with Aeris today, and it merely wasn't entirely due to the fact of what happened in the early morning. To his immense surprise, Aeris was spontaneously changeable and he didn't know whether he was fond of such a trait within her. Her emotions transformed like the seasons and at times it simply befuddled him how Aeris could cause so much chaos within his mind by a simple word or a mere glance.
After all the time they had journeyed together, he had begun to slowly distinguish the brunette's attitudes and feelings to a level that he knew them almost as well as he knew his own. The realisation was strangely disturbing as it was almost comforting; to be able to interact with someone to a point that they almost felt like an extension of oneself. It was also strange how Aeris had became such a significant part of his being when she had been with him for such a short period of time. At times, Aeris annoyed him to such a level that he was more than ready to gag her mouth and throw her over his shoulder, and make her stay there for the remainder of their journey. But then there were other times, when her angelic laughter caused his heart beat to slow and quicken at the same time. He could not help but wonder how he managed to be in the presence of someone who could act so sociable around him (when she wasn't angry of course) and did not feel the need to put on any heirs or pretences of mock-respect and fear. She treated him like he was no more than what he was. The thought was very refreshing, especially when he knew there was other special 'connection' that tied them both together. Aeris shared the same ancestry of the Ancients as him. Out of every being that lived on the planet, she was the only one who was united with the same blood bond as himself. It seemed almost too good to be true. But by observing his companion, he knew without a doubt that she was not like a 'normal human'. Her eyes blazed with the spirit of her will. Her passions were fiery and expressive in emotion, yet could recede into gentle embers and glow with such purity, that could only be found within the heart of a child. It was that truth which sparked both interest and irritation within the swordsman, ever since he took care of her. There was something sweet about her childlike innocence that attracted his dark illusive self to her. He knew that she was untouched by the wrath of humans, nor had she been polluted by the physical touch of man. Her purity both managed to blind him with disbelief and awe how a lone Cetran girl managed to remain untainted in a world corrupted by traitorous beings. However, her purity also reflected the girl's naivety of the world, and it was that certain quality that made Sephiroth anger rise at her at the most unpredictable times; such as last night.
Last night's event truly astounded him; Aeris actually wanted him to not eliminate her attacker! He could not understand what would spur her to think such things, let alone to act on them. Sephiroth was entirely shocked how Aeris could not understand that if he set that attacker free, then the sinner would get away unpunished and without judgement; and not only that, if he let the attacker go...then the ninja could return in the future to finish off the job she began. He remembered the very words he said to her.
'Stop this Aeris! Don't you understand that I was trying to protect you? Did you want that girl to kill you?'
However, Aeris had slapped him over his duty for avenging her. It proved how Aeris was far too innocent if she could not understand the meaning of revenge and retribution. This awareness only created a difference between them both that Sephiroth did not like. But even so, the swordsman could not find it in himself to truly hate her. He was almost ashamed to admit how Aeris' lack of faith of him managed to dishearten him so. In the past, he certainly did not care for anyone's feelings beside his own; and even if there was a problem, Masamune was always there to fix it. But Aeris was different from those 'disgusting humans'. He was attracted to her; there was no doubt about it. Whether it was her fiery spirit, or the fact that her almighty will was almost as turgid as his own; Sephiroth could not help but be fascinated with the enigma that was Aeris; and it was that realisation that he hated so much. He had no idea what to do with her. She even seemed to have a form of control over him, despite the fact that she denied so yesterday. What was worse that she did not wish to believe his words of honour when he told her of the girl's fate.
'If she was going to dismiss my truth as lies, then I am going to make sure that from now on my relationship with the girl would be no less than mere acquaintances...'
'But...I...why can't I stop thinking about her...?'
'And why...why can't I fight the urge to look at her...?'
'...why is her face in my mind when I close my eyes...?'
'Aeris...why...no...what have you done to me...?'
He remembered his silent words he made in the morning but it seemed that he was having a difficult time keeping his solemn promise. If only Aeris was silent and obedient then it would have been so easy to regard her as nothing more than an 'acquaintance'. But, as Sephiroth had realised, nothing managed to go as planned when dealing with a certain brown haired Cetra. Everything Aeris did affected him. She was an enigma that he could not ignore no matter how much he tried. The girl interested him. She angered him; confused him, worried him, and yet amused him.
He certainly had no way of understanding how or even why Aeris did such things, other than pure naivety and not having the correct education of her heritage. That certain thought relieved him, slightly. Aeris was only acting rebellious as she had been deluded by the views and values of the human traitors. She cared for the life of those foolish humans because she had no 'mother' like he to teach her the true ways of life. He knew he had to rectify that. Sephiroth then swore to himself that someday he would teach the girl all he knew so that she would finally realise that in the end, he was right all along, and that no human traitor was worth the life of a Cetra. Aeris would be educated in the lessons of 'mother' and himself and then she would finally realise her purpose in life.
'Yes...then she would truly understand...'
'Aeris will realise what I am to her...and what she is to me...'
'Because I...'
Sephiroth knew that he couldn't imagine the thought of Aeris not being with him. The idea seemed strange, terrible and downright unwelcome in his mind, even though Aeris had created so many complications that had all but delayed him from his mother. She had given him so much emotional turmoil and had acted so disobedient; and that if she was a normal human, he knew he would have left her carcass on the streets of Midgar.
'But she is no normal human...she is a Cetra.....and I could not harm her for she-'
'-her blood is like my own. Our enemies are one and the same...'
'We are united by our divine ancestors...'
'The last of our kind.'
'And...I would never abandon her, even for all the power in the world.'
'I will continue to protect the last female Cetra, along with my mother...and nothing will ever change that.'
'But-'
'-that still doesn't mean I have to talk to her today...she still has disappointed me, and Aeris has to learn that I am not going to tolerate her childish attitude or her insubordination.'
And with those words as his final decision, Sephiroth let his thoughts recede into the back of his mind for another time. Night was vastly approaching and the swordsman was very well aware that they needed to find a place of rest soon if they wanted to reach Nibelheim tomorrow.
3 hours later...
The light of day had once again waned into yet another starless night. The air was thick with a frigid silence that seemed to stretch across the lands for miles on end. Sephiroth still refused to talk to the flowergirl ever since their minor quarrel in the morning, and Aeris was now beginning to feel the aftermath of travelling with such an anti-social companion. The first thing that she noted irritably, was how her feet hurt terribly. It did not help that her large brown boots were a few sizes too big, not to mention that the weight of them caused great discomfort on her small, dainty feet. Her body felt dirty and sweaty due to the scorching heat that Sephiroth made them march through, and Aeris all but wished to slip out of her sweat-ridden clothes, and have a nice long soak in the sea; her fear be damned! But alas, her body felt far too fatigued from walking on for countless hours without even a single break; and she was more than sure that she would not have the energy to keep herself afloat if she were to go out into the sea. She certainly did not want to experience drowning again anytime soon; especially when she knew that her 'saviour' would be none to pleased to pull her unconscious body out of the water.
'And I am not even sure he would even 'save' me, not with the way he has been acting today,' the brunette thought, as she munched on her tasteless rations that a certain 'oh so kind' silver haired swordsman had brought for her. Taking a final bite of her hard dried beef, Aeris put the rest of the 'tasty' food into the bag that was sitting right beside her. She knew she wasn't really hungry tonight despite the awareness that she had burned up an exponential amount of calories in just one day.
'Heh. Sephiroth would make a great fitness trainer...' Aeris thought wryly, before dragging her hand through a path of countless knots that was her hair. "Great," she muttered to herself, as she once again stared down at her sweaty and grass-stained dress that certainly looked like it had seen better days. Aeris knew that she could have almost been able to overlook her messy appearance; heck, she could have almost accepted her lapse of hygiene in the last few days if she knew that Sephiroth was going to take her straight to the nearest inn they passed. However, Aeris knew that Sephiroth was not going to take any more 'unnecessary delays' if their twenty mile trek was anything to go by. The brunette even remembered how they passed a village late in the afternoon, yet Sephiroth continued on irregardless. To Aeris, it was practically infuriating to have no control or awareness on where she were going. Of course she knew that Sephiroth was taking her to this placed called 'Nibelheim', however she had no idea how long it would take them both to get there, nor did she know what Sephiroth wanted to do there. There was also the fact that Sephiroth's mother was going to be there and that thought managed to unease the brunette. To be honest, she had no idea what kind of person Sephiroth's mother would be like. But what disturbed her most was when the swordsman commented a few days ago that he had 'lost' his mother's hand. 'His mother's hand!' That realisation was shocking enough but the way Sephiroth said it so casually made it even more undeniably disturbing, if not a little freakish to even comprehend. Aeris couldn't even understand why Sephiroth would even have his mother's hand in his possession, and it made her wonder if the 'hand' was a nickname for something such as a SOLDIER'S secret code of PHS or something. However, the brunette had a feeling that his 'mother's hand' was exactly as she imagined it to be, and Aeris couldn't fight the shiver that swept through her entire body.
'I need to stop thinking such things...' Aeris thought to herself. But it wasn't an easy task since she had nothing, or most specifically 'no-one' to refocus her mind on...
The brunette, aware of her immense boredom, decided to gaze at 'their' encampment. Unlike last time when they rested in a forest, Sephiroth had set up camp underneath a natural alcove that resided near a fantastic view of a coast. The winds carried a fresh scent of sea salt in the air; a smell that the brunette could have enjoyed if it weren't for the fact that the wind was so very cold! Rubbing her goose-pimpled arms with discomfort, Aeris wondered why she had not decided to get ready herself for bed. However the earlier remembrance of her 'luxury bedding', not to forget the 'oh so comfortable lumpy mattress' she owned was enough of a temptation to stay up for a few hours longer. Pulling her knees to her chest, Aeris repositioned herself on her scratchy woollen blanket she had placed on the rocky ground for pseudo-comfort. Even though the brunette did not want to admit it, she felt terribly alone despite the knowledge that her silver haired companion was sitting no further than fifteen feet away from her. To her, Aeris believed that Sephiroth was being more than a little childish with his 'cold shoulder' attitude, but she knew herself that she was in no mood to test the swordsman's explosive temper. Now that she really thought about it, Aeris still did not truly know why Sephiroth was still sulking around her.
'After all,' she mentally began. 'Wasn't he the one who created this problem in the first place with Yuffie, so shouldn't I be the one sulking?'
Another thing that bothered the brunette was why Sephiroth even tried to hide the truth that he had healed Yuffie. To Aeris, it simply made no sense. His actions and secrecy were only creating unnecessary conflict between them both. His words still puzzled her too. She still couldn't believe how Sephiroth could act in such a way; with so much spontaneity that managed to leave her breathless...
'But why didn't he just tell me...' Aeris' mind continued. 'It makes no sense...' The fact that he even tried to evade himself from the truth pained the brunette with how little trust he must have had in her. To be honest, if she thought over her journey with the swordsman, it was nothing short off crazy. After beginning one day like so many others; alone in a abandoned church; before watching a man fall from the sky and into her cherished flowerbed. Then suddenly being kidnapped by Shinra after so many years of hiding from them. Then being branded like cattle and tested and prodded as if she were a piece of meat. Only then to be rescued by none other than the Ex-General of the Shinra army; who shockingly enough shares the same ancient blood as her... Then trekking countless miles through fields of never-ending green, and passing foreign faces both young and old. She had rode on gigantic ships and small cute feathered chocobos. She had seen velvet skies dusted with the freckles of heaven's magic, and gazed at bleeding horizon which slowly relinquishing the sky to the night. Everything Aeris had seen had all shocked and awed her. The nature of life sung heavily within her ears. The glow of life resonated from above. Everything around her was nothing short of a miracle. Aeris knew she should be feeling happy after life bestowed her such wonderful experiences. She knew she should be praying to the ground, and weeping out to the glory of the planet for granting her a companion who could understand her differences; and who could appreciate her differences like his own.
But...
Aeris felt neither happy... Nor did she feel sad...
She felt confused...and felt even more lost than she had ever felt before.
No matter how she looked upon the matter, Sephiroth was still a stranger to her. His face was a glacial mask that reflected no emotion other than the ones he wanted others to see. He could act so indifferent but then become so monstrously temperamental that he still could manage to frighten her. In a way Sephiroth was like a time bomb waiting to go off at any moment. The thought was terrifying. But then when she least expected it, Sephiroth could act so calm; so gentle that it was almost sweet. He had even kissed her; heck he had even 'touched' her when she had all but fallen into sadness. In a way, he acted like a teacher to a pupil. He was stern-faced and cold, yet was encouraging and inspirational that it made Aeris wonder 'who was the real Sephiroth was?'. She only hoped that it wasn't the 'grumpy' man that was sitting away from her.
'I guess I should leave Mr Grumpy alone for now,' Aeris thought to herself. 'There is no need to agitate him further.'
Closing her eyes, the brunette tried to relax to the soothing sound of waves oscillating across the sand. The rhythm was hypnotic and soon Aeris felt her body lull into a calm serenity brought by the sea. As the minutes passed, Aeris felt her imagination flow into action. She imagined herself lying on a white sandy beach with the stars glinting down from above. Then slowly the sea would rise upwards to gently lick her toes, before receding back to repeat the action once again. The waves continued these motions before slowly rising higher; trailing their way up her calves before naughtily wetting the insides of her inner thighs, then gently receding once more. The process repeated again; and again; and before Aeris knew it, the water had risen to the point where it was touching her puckered lips; trailing across her delicate skin like the hands of an experienced lover. The sounds of the water whispered across her body, in a song that human words could never dream to decipher. The cold only heightened the dream and Aeris felt herself gasp as the salt water slipped in her mouth and entirely submerged her whole body into its slippery grasp. But as she felt her body sink deeper into the darkened depths, Aeris felt no discomfort, nor any need to breathe. The sea continued to draw itself across her sensitive skin, and Aeris slowly opened her eyes to see aqua hues blending and mixing with silver before her very eyes. Her lashes fell down onto her flushed cheeks to rise upwards at the call of her name.
"Aeris..."
The swirls of colours moved and began to slowly take form.
"Aeris."
Shapes turned into limbs, and the touches became more frequent; more warmer to her once ice-cold skin.
"...Aeris?"
Coils of silver trailed down like liquid silk and Aeris tried not to gasp as her whole body was enveloped within a pair of heated arms; and pulled towards a firm, warm body.
"Aeris!"
She felt her hands move across a defined chest, while her head slowly moved away from a pounding heartbeat; past a thickly corded neck, and a pointed chin. Her emerald gaze moved from the soft tanned lips; the familiar aristocratic nose, and defined cheekbones. Aeris' gaze continued upwards until her gaze was once again on that beautiful blend of aquamarine. Not really blue, nor either defined as green. It was a colour that haunts the night of its prey; a shade that can never be seen in the eyes of any other being, except him...
'It's...'
"AERIS!"
'Sephiroth?'
Aeris' eyes snapped wide open in alarm, as her body choked automatically from the shock of her dream.
Aeris panted as she stared wide eyed at her trembling palms. Sephiroth was suddenly at her sides, shaking her shoulders with enough force to jerk her body from side to side.
"Aeris! Wake up!" The swordsman literally roared in her ears. "What is wrong with you?"
The brunette winced from the grip. "Stop it," Aeris moaned as her subconscious dissipated into reality. The swordsman's tossing stopped however his hands remained still upon the girl's shoulders.
"Aeris, what happened? You suddenly fell into a coma-state for the past ten minutes," Sephiroth said quickly. "Are you alright?"
Aeris blinked in confusion. 'Is this the real Sephiroth?'
Sephiroth actually looked worried about her. The brunette stared up into his eyes to only regret the action when her gaze latched to the same eyes in her dream. Aeris felt her whole body tremble, and she knew that Sephiroth must have felt it too since his hands were still latched on her shoulder.
"I-I'm fine," Aeris said hastily as she turned her head away from his piercing gaze. There was no way in hell she would let Sephiroth know of her feelings for him; especially since he had been acting like a jerk to her all day. She all but hoped Sephiroth would just leave her alone to her thoughts.
'I still can't believe it. I dreamt I was with Sephiroth...oh gods...what does this mean?'
She wasn't sure if it was her imagination but she thought she heard her companion sigh with what sounded like relief, however his grip did not loosen. But then the swordsman spoke and what he said caused the brunette's own temper to jump in surprise
"Don't do that again," Sephiroth said sharply. The tone in which he said it was fierce and extremely condescending, and it once again made Aeris think of her analogy of how Sephiroth acted like her teacher. It infuriated her on another level how Sephiroth was literally 'telling her off' for something that she was not aware of doing.
'How dare he...'
The brunette's eyes flared at him with undisguised anger. "What? You think I made myself fantasise you..." Aeris began to retort before freezing in shock when she realised what she had almost said. Instead of her face flaring red with anger, it was replaced with both shock and the embarrassment with what she had almost let slip. Aeris couldn't even dare to look up at her companion's face to see what expression he would hold there. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry at her stupidity. She had just admitted that she had been fantasise of her companion. Fantasise? Regardless of the fact that she 'didn't' finish the sentence off, she was well aware of the swordsman's intelligence and that he would quickly gain the implication of her words. She had just had a dream with Sephiroth in more than in a friendly manner. She dreamt of him touching her; watching her; wanting her to submerge herself into his iron embrace. That realisation only meant one thing.
'Oh gods...'
There was no mistake, Aeris wanted to be with Sephiroth. What hurt the most was that she still didn't know who 'Sephiroth' truly was, not to forget that it was doubtful he really would want to be with her romantically. Hell, he had murdered people before her very eyes. He had snapped and scolded her almost on a daily basis for her silliness or tardiness. He had embarrassed her, and hurt her countless times; and more often than not, he treated her like a lowly grunt in the army, or more perhaps...he treated her like a helpless child that could not fend for herself if her life depended on it. Both ideas were so very degrading...But even so, Aeris felt her heart beat quicken till a point where she had to gasp quietly to breath when she stared into his penetrative, glowing, mako eyes...
'I told him-'
He knows...
'-that I dreamt-'
He is already disgusted with me...
'-of him-'
He will want to abandon me...
'-and now he-'
He wouldn't want me...
'-knows the truth...'
Because he knows I am too weak for him...
'-that I love him..'
Aeris felt the beginnings of fresh tears start to gather at the corners of her eyes, and the harder she tried to quell them, the more they threatened to fall.
'I love him?'
By repeating that startling revelation in her mind, Aeris felt the first trail of her tears slip beneath her clenched eyelids. She felt naked and exposed. Angry and upset, and despite everything she felt, she wanted more than anything to be as far away from Sephiroth as possible.
She did not want him to see her cry.
All the while the silver haired swordsman was silent. The only reason Aeris knew that he was still there was because she could feel his slackened grip across her shoulders.
"Aeris?"
The brunette didn't dare to raise her head in fear that he would see the truth in her eyes if he hadn't already.
"...what did you say?" the swordsman asked softly, in a tone unlike his own.
Aeris clenched her hands at her sides, her nerves so tight that she was ready to bolt at any given moment.
'I've got to get away...he cannot know,' she thought to herself. 'I can't tell him. I don't want to look into his eyes and know that they would never look like the ones I saw in my dream...I don't...I can't...I wish...'
"Aeris!"
Hearing the familiar tone of irritation rise from the swordsman's lips caused the brunette to snap. "Oh go away Sephiroth, you didn't want to talk to me earlier on today, so why start now?" Aeris snapped, knowing what she said was cruel, but she was too embarrassed with her admittance of her dream to take her words back. She raised her gaze, uncaring that she was displaying the beginnings of fresh tears. She would never submit to anyone who treated her in such a way the swordsman was doing now.
Although it was slight, Aeris saw the Sephiroth's glowing eyes narrow into what the brunette now realised was his 'pissed off face'.
"If you weren't acting so much like a child, then I wouldn't have to treat you like one." he argued back.
Aeris fought the urge to laugh. "Me, a child? What about yourself Sephiroth?" She exclaimed as she pointed to the irritated swordsman. "You are the one whose been acting most childish with that 'I-don't-want-to-talk-to-you' look on your face all day!"
The brunette's words caused the flecks of green in the swordsman's eyes to brighten, while the rest of his face looked ready for a total meltdown. Aeris met his glare with all her might, not wanting to bow down when she knew that he was the one in the wrong. Their faces continued to clash in a battle of wills that never wanted to yield to the other. But no sooner has the swordsman's face darkened to fury, his expression withered away into emptiness. It was a distant look, that betrayed no thought or feeling. Aeris after staring at that face for countless seconds, decided that she hated that 'look' on his face the most. To her, the expression appeared ugly on his usually handsome features. He looked so harsh, so dark; so very cruel that it hurt to look at him. Sephiroth appeared so cold that if his face was replaced with a statue, Aeris would have hardly been able to tell the difference.
Sephiroth sighed deeply, before extracting his hands from the brunette's shoulders.
"... just get to sleep Aeris," he muttered coolly, before standing and turning his body away from her.
The brunette frowned, shocked and irritated how Sephiroth could so easily brush her words aside and then treat her like a naughty child that deserves to go to bed. She also hated how the swordsman could act so cool and calm when she was more than ready to explode!
"Hey! We aren't finished Mister!" Aeris cried out, as she leapt to her feet and moved so that she was in the swordsman's vision.
"This is what I mean Sephiroth! How do you expect me to act when one moment you are ignoring me like the plague, and then the next you are glaring at me like I am the bane of your whole existence?"
Sephiroth did not comment, and his silence was as frigid as the wind that whipped across her face.
Aeris' angry face softened as she continued to stare at her companion's withdrawn expression. "What has happened to you Sephiroth?" she asked. "I thought I knew who you really were."
The swordsman replied to her question with his same hawk like stare. But then his gaze lifted from her as he turned and walked away from her, causing his long tendrils of silver to dance in the breeze behind him.
"Sephiroth?"
"-----------"
His voice was like a whisper on the winds.
"I thought I knew who you were too."
His words caused the brunette to freeze momentarily; the remains of her anger colliding to a halt. Aeris blinked as she watched the ex-General walk towards the slope facing the sea. His silver locks and leather coat rippled in the cold night breeze, and Aeris swore she could visibly see a black aura surrounding the stoic swordsman.
'Huh...what does he mean by I thought I knew who you were too...she thought in confusion before questions began to flow there mind. '-have I...have I been concentrating on Sephiroth strangeness so much, that I have not realised that I have been acting differently too...?'
"
Sephiroth?"
"-----------"
"Sephiroth?
"-----------"
"Sephiroth...why won't you talk to me?"
"-----------"
"Are you angry at me?"
"-----------"
"Come on Sephiroth! Stop playing around!"
"-----------"
"This is not funny!"
"-----------"
"Sephiroth?"
'He really is ignoring me...I guess I'll have to try harder...'
"Sephiroth? Oh Sephy-Sephy?"
"-----------"
"...why don't you want to talk to Aunty-Aeris?"
"-----------"
"Are you hungry Sephiroth...is that why you are so grumpy?"
"-----------"
"Or maybe thirsty?"
"-----------"
"Okay this is really not funny Sephiroth! Come on! I definitely won't go to my tent and rest if you don't say SOMETHING!"
"-----------"
"Sephiroth?"
"-----------"
"Seph-?"
No matter what Aeris said, the swordsman remained silent; nor did he move to her childlike banter. Aeris was starting to get even more worried about her companion. This had never happened before.
'What is wrong with him?'
'Why is he ignoring me?'
'Have I done something to Sephiroth...have I...hurt him and not realised so?'
The answer was staring her at the face. She should have realised it sooner. Sephiroth was acting distant to her and she was the cause of it. Aeris felt her wide eyes darken with an oncoming feeling of guilt mixed with uncertainty. She did not know exactly what was causing the swordsman to act in such manner...but she could think of multiple reasons. She knew that she had consistently blamed him and moaned at him ever since she had joined him. She had argued and complained more or less at every idea that passed his lips. She rebelled to almost every command he had told her to do, and more often than not she managed to rile him up so much that she could see a nerve twitch in his jaw. She had always thought that teasing and angering the swordsman was a sure way to strip his mask of cold aloofness from gaze and make him appear more...human. And that seemed like the most funniest thing to do. But now that she thought about it, Sephiroth being angry didn't seem funny at all.. In fact, the revelation shocked and shamed the flowergirl, and Aeris now wondered whether such disrespectful behaviour was the cause of drawing Sephiroth further away from her than she had ever thought possible. She certainly hoped not.
Uncaring about the cold air around her, Aeris dropped her blanket and dashed towards the swordsman, ready to get the truth from him before the night was ready to end. Stopping before him once more, the brunette stared at Sephiroth; however his inhuman eyes failed to make contact with hers. The silver haired warrior stared over at the sea in a way that held a glacial calmness. However, Aeris knew without a doubt that the swordsman wasn't at all interested in the scenery. She knew that he was most likely staring at the waves as an outlet to ignore her presence, and for some reason this awareness made the brunette more upset than angry. Had she been so cruel to him as to deserve such treatment? Did she really hurt him and not realise why? Was that why he had been ignoring her for the whole day? Was he still angry from yesterday? Did he blame her for getting hurt last night ? Or maybe it was about something else...did he resent her for being so weak...so defenceless that she couldn't even protect herself? Or did he still resent all those times she slapped him in the face? Or maybe he has finally realised the truth that had tormented her so many nights before...that she was not a Cetra... Did that mean Sephiroth was leave her? Was he silent because he was thinking about leaving her out on the field? Alone; abandoned; lost in a world that was cold and empty of warmth?...Or maybe he was thinking how he would let her follow him despite their differences...But then if that was so... why couldn't he not look at her...? Could he not accept her...if she was not a Cetra? Was that the reason why he was distant...because he cared nothing for a non-Cetra? Or maybe he wasn't thinking anything about her not being a Cetra? Or perhaps, he was truly repulsed by her...and if so......if he really couldn't look at her now... and...someday...if he found out that she was not a Cetra...wouldn't that mean ..he...would truly end up hating her...?
'...if he didn't already...?'
Aeris truly feared the answers to her questions, and that was what spurned her actions on.
"Please, Sephiroth, tell me what's wrong," Aeris pleaded softly, as she moved towards to the silent swordsman. Yet Sephiroth's gaze remained fixed to the crashing waves behind her. Wasn't it only minutes ago that those same waves lulled her to a world of lustful dreams of the man who stood before her? Sometimes Aeris thought her friendship with Sephiroth were like those very waves. One moment, they were calm and gentle, swaying gently to the planet's serenade of life. The next moment, the waters thunders and crashed with raw emotions; thrashing and roaring with all of the might of nature's foulest temper. The idea seemed terrible to admit to.
Aeris felt fresh tears return to the corners of her eyes. "Sephiroth?"
"-----------"
"Sephiroth..?"
"-----------"
"Sephiroth?"
This time, the swordsman did respond, however his words did not help to comfort her.
"...go to bed Aeris, you must be tired." His voice remained a breathless whisper; tired, but not from physical exhaustion as the brunette had now realised.
Aeris knew her voice was ready to crack if Sephiroth was going to continue acting like this. Were her thoughts really coming true. Did Sephiroth truly hate her...?
"Sephiroth?"
"-----------"
"Seph?" she asked, as she lightly tugged his arm.
There was only so much that a woman could take.
"Is that the way you want to play it!?" Aeris shouted, in an attempt to rile up the swordsman's temper. Anything was better than his morbid silence.
"-----------"
His mouth remained ever still and not once did his eyes stray from the dark sea of the night.
"Sephiroth, please?"
"-----------"
Aeris was more than ready to become hysterical. She truly did not know what to do because it was as she feared. Something was seriously wrong with her relationship with the stoic swordsman, and before she just laid it off for him being grouchy. But now she realised it was much more serious and she must have done something to cause Sephiroth to look so detached; so solemn; so empty. It did not help matters since Sephiroth's gaze remained attached to the sea.
'
So if he likes looking at the sea, why don't I ruin his view?'
Aeris was more than ready to do anything to bring back the Sephiroth she knew; so with what little energy she had, the brunette suddenly bolted towards the sea. The wet sand squelched beneath her heavy boots, and once or twice she almost lost her balance against the uneven ground. But then the roaring waves crashed against her calves; penetrating the insides of her boots and wetting the bottom of her dress. The water was unbelievably cold, and it felt like shards of ice slashing across her skin.
'Lets see if he will continue to ignore me now.'
Turning back towards inland, Aeris was all but horrified to know that Sephiroth's gaze had not even moved. In fact, his eyes remained fixed on a specific point; a patch of sea that was miles away from the coastline. Pain, sadness, guilt and anger all merged into one thought within the brunette's mind. If she got to that point in the distance then Sephiroth would finally see her! If she could swim to that distance, Sephiroth would realise she wasn't weak...and maybe if she wasn't weak...then maybe...he could forgive her...for all the troubles she had given him. Aeris turned her head from the land and strode into the thrashing sea. She bit her lip as the cold took over her whole body. One by one, her limbs began to disappear into the icy cold water. Her breathing was frantic, and her fear was at the peak of sheer terror, but Aeris continued on. She waded through the inky darkness as far as she could. Her teeth chattered and her eyes stung with more tears as the water was now at her neck, and she knew it was only a couple more steps before her whole body would be submerged by the choking water. Yet Aeris continued on. As soon as the water became too deep for her to walk any more, Aeris had no choice but to swim. Her clothing clung to her whole figure making it so terribly hard to stretch her legs. The water was roaring in her ears and the taste of salt water was gushing in her mouth after every frantic breath. Tears pooled down her eyes and mixed with the crashing waters surrounding her. She knew she was crying but she couldn't hold it back anymore. She was gonna prove to Sephiroth that she wasn't weak and then he would finally notice her. She knew could not fight. She knew she could not fly. But she damn well knew that she could learn to swim; would swim, if only to prove her worth to Sephiroth. Her arms felt sluggish with their frantic floundering. Her legs hurt from all their relentless kicking. Aeris' body was getting tossed from side to side; thrown forwards and backwards. She felt the urge to vomit as her muscles tensed involuntarily and threatened to pull her under. She was being pulled under! Flashes of memory infiltrated her mind as she remembered the feeling of falling into deep blue depths; feeling her whole body sink deeper and deeper till a point that all she could see was water as her mind fell into unconsciousness. More tears cascaded down her face, blurring her already blurred vision into nothing more than inky blackness. But no matter how the colours of night twisted and formed around her, she could still see that one point in the distance. That one place that she knew she had to reach if only to prove her worth. She would get there even if she had to die trying. But no matter how strong her Cetra will may have been, her body could not match up to her mind; and as she tried to remain afloat, a wave out of nowhere crashed from above, pushing her down into its darkened depths. Aeris' arms flailed out in horror as she tried to rise up to safety but the sea was merciless, and Aeris felt herself sink deeper and deeper into the dark unknown that she knew she had no strength to escape from. Her air was depleting vastly and her limbs had lost the little energy they had.
She was going to drown!
A surge of bubbles rose from her lips as her eyes raised towards the sky, as if pleading nature for the last time to save her from the sea's almighty wrath. She did not want to drown now! She had to prove to Sephiroth she was not a weakling and then he would finally notice her. She could not die now! If she died, then Sephiroth wouldn't be able to forgive her for her weaknesses, and she would die with him forever hating her...
But as the final bubbles rose from her blue tinted lips, all her mind could think of was his haunting green eyes; a wingless angel that watched her as she fell into never-ending darkness.
'Sephiroth...I'm sorry...for...being..so….'
Aeris was unable to finish her thought, as her world hazed to cold silence. She was unable to sense the gurgling water; the roaring waves, or the strong arms that swept themselves around her and ascended her up towards the sky...
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There were no words that could describe the feelings that Sephiroth was experiencing at that very moment. Nothing could have prepared him, nor have shocked him to the greatest degree like the flowergirl's action she had done that very night. His heart was still racing. His lungs were still burning, and all Sephiroth could do was lay on the wet beach, panting breaths that were not created from the acts of over exertion...but horror.
He had watched Aeris do the unthinkable before his very eyes.
He had watched Aeris try to kill herself...
Author's notes
Ooh a cliff-hanger. I haven't done one of those in a long time. Lol. I first planned to do an ultra long single chapter...but then I realised that it would be better to be broken down into two. I don't think Aeris really is lucky with water ne? (and the irony is that she is placed into a watery grave in the game. lol.)
BTW, please don't forget to review. I still like to know whether people are still supporting this fic or not, or what some of you guys are thinking of my portrayal of Aeris and Sephiroth. I know that I have added my own flavour and ideas to their characterisation of two of the world most famous FF characters, and that I have come across a few complaints about how they both sometimes become OOC ... while a lot of you guys have praised me for my originality which I am more than grateful for. bows lowly. I guess I have just never liked the thought of Aeris being a Mary-sue character in FF7 and it proved that SE used her for that role in FF7-AC which I thought was slightly annoying...if not a little cliche. I guess I like showing imperfections in perfection I guess...some people may disagree with my representation of Aeris...but...ah...I guess if you really didn't like it, you wouldn't be reading this fic. LOL!
Ahem...
Anywho...
Ja ne
Aerseph4eva
Don't 4get to review!
