I can only take credit for my own ideas... everything else belongs to Veronica Roth.

So for Tobias' Fear Landscape, I am going with the book rather than the movie version of the fears and how they got past them. I like it better that way. I really enjoyed writing this chapter. It just kind of took on a life of it's own along the way.

On a side note, I have an idea for a little contest of sorts. More details to come in the next chapter.

Tris

The week has flown by so fast, I guess it is because I have been so busy. Now it is Thursday and I have my last job shadows today. I have one this morning, and then I will be with Tobias for my last one this afternoon. My time with him won't be like it was with the other job shadows. The computer system is being delivered and installed this morning and it is his job to do the system configuration and testing before tomorrow morning. That is when stage three will finally be completed as we all face our Fear Landscapes.

After lunch, I head straight to meet with him, even though I am not scheduled to be there until 3. I grab him a sandwich, apple, and a bottle of water before I go, since I know that he will not have taken the time to have lunch. When I arrive, I see him typing fervently at the computer. He takes a quick glance over his shoulder to see it is me, before returning to his work.

"Hey, you're early." He says, still focused on the screen in front of him. "I won't be ready to start the testing for a couple hours."

"I know, but I also know that you probably have not eaten a thing since breakfast, and I wanted to bring you this." I say, setting the food down on the desk.

"Thanks, honey." He says with a smile. I lean in and give him a gentle kiss.

"Anytime, babe." I say, then realizing what I just called him.

"Babe?" He cranes his head towards me.

"I don't know. Just sort of came out." I shrug. "No good?"

"Hmm... let's see. Try it again." He grins.

"So, what are you up to, babe." I laugh.

"Yeah, I think I like it." He joins me in my laughter.

"So you approve?"

"Yep, I approve." He pulls me in for another soft kiss.

"So, really, what are you up to?" I ask as I pull a chair up next to him.

"Well, the new computer system was installed this morning for the Fear Landscape system. After they got it set up, it was my job to connect the thin client systems back to the mainframe so we can run all 4 simulations at the same time. After that I had to set up all the parameters for the simulations for tomorrow. Then I had to start re-loading all the data for the previous simulations from the back-ups. Once I get all the data loaded, I will be able to run through a landscape to make sure that everything is ready."

"Ah, that's all." I grin. "I would have had that done hours ago."

"Sure, Tris, whatever you say." He laughs.

"Whatever I say? Hmm... I kind of like the sound of that." I chuckle. He looks at me, suspiciously. "Right now I say...hmm... what do I want? I've got it! Right now... I say... that my wonderful... handsome... fantastic... intelligent boyfriend... needs to stop what he is doing right now..." I pause.

"... and he needs to eat his lunch."

"As you command, my love." He says with a mock bow.

He quickly eats his lunch and then gets right back to work. I simply sit and watch him for the next few hours until he finally clicks a final button and sighs.

"There, finally done. I really hope I don't have to do that again."

"Do they know what caused it to crash before?"

"Yep. It was all because of a paper clip."

"A paper clip?"

"So what we are guessing, is that there must have been a stack of papers on top of the computer held together with at least one paper clip. And at some point, one of the clips fell off the papers and managed to slip inside the back of the computer. It jammed in the cooling fan and caused the cpu to overheat. According to the janitor that found it, there was smoke coming out of the back before he managed to unplug it. When the Erudite tech got here to check it out, she said that there were actually a few chips that had begun to melt."

"I see, so all that work caused by a single paper clip."

"Well not just the paper clip." He shrugs.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"The main cpu was supposed to have nightly backups of the data sent to the servers in Erudite, so that if there ever was a failure, the information could simply be restored. But when I got looking into the system logs, I noticed that there has not been a complete backup done in 22 months. It seems that there was a failed procedure in the database that caused the process to fail, and no one noticed it. So now I have set it all back up from scratch, scheduled the backups to begin running again, and set up system alerts to be sent to the control room supervisor if the backups fail again."

"Have I told you how smart you are?"

"Hmm... not today." He smirks.

"Well, Tobias James Eaton... you, my dear, are a genius."

"Why, thank you." He gives me a light peck on the lips.

"What now?" I ask.

"Now, we are going to test the system."

"How do we do that?"

"Come with me." He says as he types in a few commands into the system. He leads me into one of the simulation rooms and closes the door behind us.

"Is this where we will do the testing?"

"Yep. We are going through my Fear Landscape... together." He says. I find that I am suddenly nervous.

"Are you sure that you want me to see all that?"

"Tris, there is no one else that I would ever want to see it. Besides, you probably know what most of them are anyway."

He places the electrodes on both of us and then injects the serum, first in my neck then his own. We sit back in out chairs and wait for the simulation to begin. Moments later, the room fades into total darkness before it suddenly becomes blindingly bright. I look around and see that we are standing on top of a building. I peer over the edge and find that I am unable to even see the ground. Of course this is his fear of heights.

He has had this fear for longer than I have known him. He once told me that, when he was about 5 years old, he loved to climb trees. The taller the tree, the more he loved it. Then one day, he found a huge maple tree not too far from his house, and he decided to climb to the very top. He had just gotten to the top of the tree when, out of nowhere, it began to storm. He called out for help getting down and when Marcus saw him up there, he said that he had to figure it out on his own. He told him that if he was stupid enough to get stuck up there, he deserved to stay for a while. He was too afraid to climb down the wet branches, so he stayed at the top of the tree, looking down to the ground below, afraid that at any moment he would slip and go plummeting to the ground. He has been afraid ever since that day, and never again climbed a tree.

I see the fear in his eyes, and take control of the situation. I know what we need to do. In order to get past this part of the simulation, we need to jump. I take him by the hand and lead him to the edge of the building. I squeeze his hand firmly, count to three and we both leap from the building.

There is only a brief moment of falling before we are suddenly on the ground again. I look around me and see that we are not just on the ground, we are in side a room. A small room, devoid of windows or doors, no bigger than... a closet. Realization hits me like a punch to the gut. For many years, Marcus' second favorite form of punishment for Tobias, was to lock him in a closet. He was forced to spend hours at a time shut in the closet, not allowed to make a sound, until Marcus decided that his punishment was sufficient and let him out. If he made too much noise while he was confined, usually because of a panic attack, he was also beaten when he was let out. He quickly learned to hold his fear inside to avoid Marcus discovering how much this hurt him.

Then, just as I began to acclimate to the room, the walls began closing in on us. I realize what we need to do the get this to end. I pull T.J. as close to my body as possible and curl up in a ball in his arms. He follows suit and curls his body around mine, so that we were taking up as little space as physically possible. A moment later, I feel the walls begin to retract, and we are suddenly in a different room again.

I see a woman standing across from us and realize that she is holding a gun. She slowly raised the gun in our direction and points it directly at Tobias. This time, he barely hesitates. He reaches to grab a gun off of a table that I did not even notice. He calmly raises the gun and points it in her direction. He aims, takes a deep breath, and turns his face away as he pulls the trigger, ending this part of the simulation.

When the scene changes again, I immediately know where we are. We are back in Abnegation. We are in the house of Marcus Eaton. I see a pained expression cross his face and start the step closer to him, when I hear his voice. The voice of the man that I have grown to hate so much. I look up to see Marcus crossing the room with a leather belt in his hands. "Tobias. I'm just trying to help you... to be better." Then he raises his hand in the air and brings the belt whipping in Tobias's direction. I don't even have time to think before my body moves on instinct, stepping in front of Tobias. I feel the impact of the belt as it stings against my skin, before I take hold of it and rip it from Marcus' grip. Without a moment of hesitation, I raise the belt and whip it back in his direction. Just as the belt makes contact with Marcus' cheek, I am back in the simulation room, Tobias at my side.

I get up from my seat and turn to face T.J., then I am suddenly overcome with such emotions that I can barely stay on my feet. I sway a bit, before sinking to my knees, my body wracked with sobs. I feel a strong pair of arms envelope me and I sink into Tobias' chest as he holds me tightly. He takes my face in his hands and turns me to face him.

"Tris, it's ok. It was just a simulation. It's all over now." He says as he peppers my face with feather light kisses.

"I know. But..." I dissolve into more tears.

"But, what, honey?" He looks concerned.

"So much of that... was because... of him... what he did... how he treated you. I just feel like... I feel like... maybe I could have done something. Maybe I could have found a way to get you away from him. I am so sorry T.J. I just wish..."

"Stop that Tris." He cuts me off and tips my face back up to meet his gaze. "You have nothing to be sorry for... not one thing. You were the only reason I survived all those years with him. You were the only thing good that I had in my life."

"But I could have tried to get others to listen, to help you get away from him."

"Honey, there was nothing you could do. You were just a little girl. You know for a fact that there was no one that was going to take me away from Marcus' custody."

"But someone could have tried."

"Someone did try." He states.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"I have seen some files that I probably am not supposed to even know about, but there were reports filed against him."

"What kind of reports?"

"Allegations of abuse and neglect for years."

"How did you find this out?"

"Well, I have gotten pretty good at hacking into computer files over the last two years. I was able to get into some files from Abnegation and saw dozens of reports about his abuse over the years."

"And nothing ever happened to him?"

"Nope. He was too powerful, had too many friends that could just make the reports disappear. "

"Do you know who made the reports?"

"They are all listed as confidential, but I think I know."

"How do you know if it is not listed?"

"It was not really very hard to figure it out. The first reports were filed when I was 10 years old, about a month after we met."

"So you think it was..." I trail off.

"You mom. I really can't think of anyone else that it could have been. They started just after we met, and were filed at least once a month. The last one was filed 6 days before my choosing ceremony. She tried Tris, but there was nothing she could do."

"I just wish that someone could have gotten you out of his house."

"Well, she tried that too."

"What do you mean?"

"A few weeks after my 12th birthday, there was a new report filed and this one was a little different. In the report the claimant, who like I said must be your mom, stated that she had requested Marcus relinquish custody of me and allow me to live with her family. He refused, and apparently things got heated, resulting in a physical altercation between my father and your dad... well her husband, if it somehow was not really your mom. It seems that while they were arguing, Marcus tired to strike her and he stepped in."

"Oh my gosh." I say breathlessly, as a long buried memory begins to resurface. "I remember that."

"You remember them fighting?"

"Yes. I was in bed one night when I heard some talking downstairs. I got up to use the bathroom and heard my mom yelling. That was the first and only time I had ever heard my mom raise her voice, so it took me off guard. I didn't know who she was yelling at or really what they were fighting about, but I just remember the yelling. I heard her say things like 'Just let us take him.', 'He would be better off with us.', and 'He deserves better than how you treat him.' I probably should have been able to tell what they were talking about, but at the time, I was so confused as to why she would be yelling, that it didn't even cross my mind. Then I heard a loud crash and my father started yelling for him to leave their house and never even think about coming back. It all makes sense now."

"Well, it didn't end there. She filed several more times, trying to get his rights terminated, and get me placed in your home. But that was all there was to it... she filed reports and they went into a file, never to be dealt with. You parents tired to help me, but there was nothing they could do."

"I just wish..."

"I know. But we can't change the past, we just need to learn from it and move on."

"How can you be so calm about all this? That simulation was the hardest thing I have ever done, and they were not even my fears."

"Practice I guess." He shrugs.

"Practice?" I ask.

"Yep, practice over the years of holding back my emotions from Marcus. Practice facing those fears."

"Have you done your Fear Landscape very often?" I ask. He nods in reply. "Why do you do it?"

"To deal with my fears. I keep going in there, but I don't think you ever lose them. Four then, four now."

I can't come up with any other words to say, so I don't even try. I just pull him tighter into my arms and kiss him. It starts out gently at first but soon becomes intense and passionate, leaving us both breathless when we finally pull away. He stands first, pulling me to my feet after him and pulls me into a tight hug. After a few more minutes, he shows me how to shut down the computer systems, locks up, and we leave to go to the dining hall for dinner.

Dinner is spent with our normal group of friends, but the atmosphere is different. I know that this is because we are all nervous about the Fear Landscape tomorrow morning. Then in the afternoon we will get the final rankings, there will be the final cuts, and we will know who will be full Dauntless members, and who will be Factionless. We will also get our jobs and apartment assignments, though I don't need the apartment now.

When we finally head to bed, I am so exhausted I can barely get the blankets pulled over me, before I slip into a dreamless sleep.