Jackie pushed open the imposing double doors to what had been home to her for most of her life. The Burkhart Mansion was exactly as she had seen it last, and despite it being massive, empty and dreary, she had decided to move back in for the time-being to save money on rent.

It was the only asset leftover from her family's glory days that the bank had not seized upon — for her dad had in one of his more prudent moments, deeded it over to her mom before everything went belly-up in the corruption scandal that had him sitting pretty in jail at the moment.

She hadn't intended to ask for any help moving in or cleaning it up for that matter, to disbelieving snorts from Fez. Anyhow, he had let slip that she had intended to move back in, and Donna had told Kitty, who had strong-armed Red, Hyde and even Sam to come help her make it liveable again.

And so here they all were, one big happy family - despite Jackie's insistent protests - to help her move back in. The moment she had stepped into the mansion, however, those protests died on her lips, for it had been two years since anyone had lived there, and frankly, the place was a giant mess. Dust bunnies bred in every corner and she could've sworn that she even heard the scampering of mice, (mice!) somewhere in the house.

And so they all got to work. There had been a moment of stunned silence all round when Jackie had disappeared somewhere and re-emerged from the depths of the house with pails and mops and brooms, dressed in overalls and her hair up in a functional ponytail.

She glanced at them with raised eyebrows. "What?"

"I didn't know you even owned overalls," Donna said, still a little stunned.

"Or knew where the cleaning stuff was," added Fez.

She waved her hands dismissively. "Yeah well, seems like I do." She looked around the cavernous room, unsure where to start.

Kitty jumped in and seized control, which Jackie more than willingly relinquished. She divided the house into sections and sent them off to their relative sections. There was a brief argument about who should get which section, all of them clamoring for what they claimed was the 'easiest to clean', but Kitty settled all that by pairing them up and sending them on their way.

"Donna with Fez," she ordered.

They looked at each other and shrugged.

"Sam, you're with Randy."

"But, why?" Sam protested. "I wanna be with Hyde."

Kitty shot them a stern look. "No, I know what you'll end up doing if you two were together. Randy knows his way around a house so you stick with him and do what he tells you."

"But—"

Kitty ignored her and turned to Red. "Honey, you're with Steven, and Jackie'll be with me."

They started to trudge off when Kitty frowned, seeing the flaw in her plan. "No, no. That won't do."

"Red!" she called him back. "You're with me, and Steven's with Jackie."

"Uh, Mrs. Forman," Jackie started, looking uncertainly at Hyde, who had his arms folded, shades on, and Zen firmly in place. "Why can't I work with Mr. Forman?"

"That's because Red won't lift a finger unless I'm there to make sure he does, isn't that right, Red?" She looked at him pointedly.

He rolled his eyes and plodded out of the room.

"Oh you two'll be fine," Kitty said to her offhandedly, pulling out an apron and tying the strings. "And no, you can't be with Fez either cos Donna's the strong one, and well, we both know that if we put Steven and Fez together, you'll never get anything done."

She finished with her apron and clapped her hands together, looking at Jackie purposefully, "Do you want to get this house in order or not, hmm?"

Without waiting for an answer, she whirled around and headed off to the kitchen.

Hyde pushed off the Baby Grand Piano he was leaning on to toss Jackie a rag. She could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"C'mon," he muttered, then shuffled out of the room towards the wing that her bedroom was at.


Her room was exactly as she had left it, and stepping into it was like walking back in time. There was a layer of dust covering everything and she sneezed several times in quick succession.

"You okay?"

She nodded and sneezed once more, heading to the windows to draw the lilac curtains and open the windows. The windows to her room offered a full view to the pool below and she sighed as she saw the thick layer of dead leaves at the bottom of the empty pool.

She turned round just as Hyde dropped her bags in the walk-in closet at the side of the room.

"You've got a lot less crap than I thought you'd have," he muttered.

"Yeah well, I realized that I really didn't need so much stuff," she replied and started yanking the covers off her bed. A cloud of dust flew into her face and she coughed. "God, I'll never get this done by tonight."

She threw the covers to the floor and started loosening the sheets. They were tucked tight under the heavy mattress and she struggled with it. "Steven," she grunted, "a little help?"

She heard the flick of a lighter and turned around to see him slouched over an armchair sucking on a joint. She blew out an irritated breath. "Oh for the love of God, Steven. Come on, you've got to be kidding me."

He eyed her through the spiral of smoke.

"Fine. Fine. Forget it." She threw up her hands and started tugging again.

Stupid stupid First World-style bedding. She pulled one edge free and fell on her butt. She glared at the offending sheet and wished she were changing the sheets in their hut in Africa instead. Simple, uncomplicated, fuss-free.

She thought of Africa and she thought of Eric and the feeling she had been fighting for weeks assailed her. God she felt so empty. So empty and bleak and lost. Oh Eric, where are you? She felt tears gather and before she knew it, they were coursing silently down her cheeks. At that moment she simply didn't know why she had chosen to come back to Point Place.

"Oh for fu—. Jeez, Jackie, are you cryin' over a stupid sheet? Oh for Crissakes, fine. Here, I'll do it."

Hyde stomped over to her, lifted the heavy mattress and pulled off the whole sheet, along with the quilted mattress pad, the pink mattress protector and whole lot of useless crap that had gone into ensuring her a good night's sleep.

He shoved his hands through his hair, the joint dangling from his lips. He stared at her, at a loss as to what to do. Her shoulders were heaving and she had her arms around her knees.

He knelt down in front of her. "Jackie. Jackie, hey."

She ignored him. He sighed and pulled her into his arms. It was so easy to bury her head in his shoulder like she had done a million times before and she clutched on to the front of his shirt like he was a lifeline.

"Hey," he said softly, It's okay."

He never could stand to see her cry. He sat down and pulled her onto his lap, taking the opportunity to hold her again. Just for a little while, he told himself, just till she stops crying.

The tip of the joint smoldered between his lips. The distinct scent of it invaded her senses, breaking through her misery and suddenly she was downright furious. She jerked away from him sharply and wrenched the offensive thing from his lips.

"You!" she snapped at him and hurled the joint out of the window.

Hyde gave a yelp of protest. She whirled around, her eyes blazing fire. "Stop doing this to yourself!"

Hyde bristled, pissed. "What the hell! That stuff was top dollar, man!" He strode over to her to lean out the window. "You just threw away five bucks!" he yelled.

She threw up her hands and swiped angrily at her tear-stained cheeks. "Grow up, Steven."

She snatched one of her overstuffed, fluffy pillows and tugged the case off. "Stop drinking. Stop smoking. Go to work."

She thought of Masego and all the African children who would give an arm and a leg just for a fraction of the opportunities that they had. "Do something with your life."

She felt his presence behind her. She turned around just as he grabbed her arm and pulled her in close.

"That's just it with you, innit? I'm never good enough for you. You're always wantin' something more," he snarled.

"No, Steven, I don't," she said, and her voice came out thin. "I never have. I just want you to be the best that you can be."

He curled back his lips in a sneer. "Sure you do."

"I always did!"

Hyde's nostrils flared. "You never even waited for my answer!" he yelled. "You gave me a goddamn ultimatum with a bullshit deadline that you never intended to keep! And you ran off with Kelso. Kelso goddammit!"

"I'm sorry!" she screamed at him. "But I couldn't do it! I couldn't wait for an answer that I knew wasn't coming!"

"How in holy hell do you even know that?!"

"How did I know that?" she asked him incredulously. "Steven. You already broke up with me once because you couldn't give me answer!"

"'Cos we were kids! I didn't even know what I was gonna do the next day!"

She took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down. "I just wanted to know that you could see me in your life. I wasn't asking for forever. I was just asking for a possibility." She tried to pull out of his grasp but he held on tight.

"It would've been enough for me," she added wearily.

"Then why the fuck did you leave?!"

She stared at him.

Little pieces started coming together in her mind to form a thought so far-fetched, so impossible that her heart nearly stopped. It couldn't be.

"No," she whispered. "No… You couldn't have."

He stared right back at her, chest heaving with emotion. He let go of her arms and stepped back, patting savagely around his jeans for a cigarette.

Jackie watched him. "Steven."

Flick went his lighter.

She walked up to him and tried to reach for him but he pulled back.

He brought the cigarette to his lips and took a deep drag.

"I was gonna propose," he said flatly, blowing smoke up towards the ceiling. "Or as close to proposing as I could anyways. I was gonna get you a ring. Your ring. Bona-fide diamond one that you wanted."

Another drag, then he continued, "But I couldn't. So I stole Forman's pansy-ass idea and got you a promise ring instead. It wasn't much, just plain silver, but whatever."

Jackie's eyes filled. "Oh Steven," she whispered, thrown by what he said. He had had a ring in his pocket that night. She took a step closer to him, and raised both hands to frame the side of his jaw.

His eyes hardened. "And then I found you with Kelso."

She dropped her hands and looked away. So many misunderstandings. So many regrets.

"I didn't sleep with him."

"Don't matter."

"Why didn't you let me explain?"

"'Cos it didn't matter. You were with Kelso. Goddamn Kelso."

"Nothing happened! We could've worked things out, Steven! Things could've been different. We could have been happy!"

He lifted his shoulders. "Yeah, well they didn't," he said, trying to hold on to his Zen. "You were my girlfriend. He was my friend. He knew I was getting you the ring."

He shook his head in disgust. "Some friend," he muttered.

He had forgiven his friend in Vegas as best as he could. For Kelso was an idiot and idiots always did idiotic things. But though things seemed fine between him and Kelso on the surface, Hyde found that he could never forget. The betrayal had cut deep.

"He knew?"

Hyde jerked his head sharply. "Everyone knew."

She couldn't help herself. "Even Eric?" she blurted out.

Hyde glanced at her strangely. "Forman came up with it. A promise to promise. Or some similar lame shit."

Her head swam. He had gotten her a ring. God, it would kill him if he knew about her and Eric.

"But… But you went to Vegas," she said slowly. She looked up at him, wounded. And you married Sam."

He nodded. "Yep."

She felt weak and sat back on the now bare mattress, her eyes fixed unseeingly on the opposite wall.

"Is it a game to you, Steven?" she said tonelessly. "Tit-for-tat. I hurt you, you hurt me." She pulled her eyes from the spot on the wall to glance at him. "How's that 'love'?"

"You left me," he repeated. He took a drag. And then another. "Twice."

She flew at him and attacked him in a sudden flurry of fists. "How dare you!" she screamed. "How dare you!" She aimed a particularly vicious kick to his shin that had him doubled over and howling in pain.

"Ow! Dammit, Jackie!"

"No! You did not just say that to me, Steven Hyde."

"Say what? 'Ow'?" he muttered sarcastically.

She glared at him, steam rising from her ears. "I loved you! I gave you everything! We made love and I went to sleep in your arms feeling like the happiest girl in the world and you broke my heart again the very next day."

She shook her head violently. "I can't take it anymore, Steven. I can't."

He straightened and folded his arms across his chest. "I never made you any promises."

She closed her eyes for his words hurt and they hurt deep.

When she opened them again it was to nod her head slowly in acknowledgement. "No, you didn't."

He shrugged.

She glanced away and blinked back tears. "Four times you broke my heart. There's only so much a girl can take. Four's my limit. I had to leave. I couldn't stay and live off the scraps that you throw me from your table. I loved you so much. You were my world. My whole world. I gave you everything."

"So did I!" he yelled at her.

She raised her eyes to his and in them he saw a weary kind of acceptance. "And then you stopped," she said simply.

He held her gaze for a long moment, his mask of zen carefully on.

"And then I stopped," he echoed tonelessly, his hands dangling by his sides.

She suddenly felt so drained. He hadn't changed a bit; while she felt like she had been through the wringer and back.

"I won't stop caring for you," she told him quietly.

He lifted his shoulders again in another of his famous shrugs. "Whatever, Jackie."

She bowed her head, silently accepting his words. "Which is why it hurts me so much when I see you drink like that. Or get so high on dope you can barely walk straight."

She bent over and reached for another of her overstuffed pillows, shaking her head in reluctant resignation. "But you're with Sam now… It's no longer my place."

He wanted to yell at her, tell her that it was always her place. But pride, stubbornness, self-preservation and a myriad of other reasons stood in his way.

When he opened his mouth to speak, all that he said was, "Whatever."

She swallowed hard as he turned his back and stalked out of the room.

Safely outside and away from her, he reached for another cigarette, amazed to find that his hands were shaking.


Despite Steven's lack of help, she managed to get her bedroom and bathroom habitable again and was relieved that she was able to move back in to her old home that very night. Kitty had promised to drop by the following day with enough frozen dinners and casseroles to last her a week, a kindness that she gratefully accepted.

She avoided the basement for three days after that. Her fight with Steven had thrown her into an emotional whirl and she needed to be alone with her thoughts and to sort everything out. She swung between anger and guilt till she didn't know what she felt anymore.

He had been able to see her in his future. He had been going to say yes to her. It had to mean something, didn't it? She was so confused.

And what about Eric?

What about Eric? She thought fiercely. She flipped around on her bed and punched her pillow furiously. She hadn't heard from him in ages. Did he think of her as an affair too? She knew that's what she had tried to tell herself it was, but it hurt so badly at the thought that Eric might think of it that way too.

Why hadn't she heard from him? She flopped back on her back and pulled the covers up to her chin, staring at the ceiling. She thought of their last night together. She thought of all their quiet conversations and shared laughter.

She missed him. She missed him so much. She ached for his touch. The feel of his breath on her skin. The look in his eyes when she came into a room. How they darkened to a stormy grey when he was deep inside her.

Stoppit, Jackie.

It was over. He was over there and she was over here. They had turned to each other for comfort and that was all there was to it. She thought of Steven and Donna and forced Eric out of her mind.

Two hours later she was still awake. She sighed and looked down at the Led Zeppelin shirt she was wearing. It was worn and buttery soft from frequent wash. She fingered the hem of the shirt and brought the collar up to her nose, trying to see if any traces of Steven still lingered but all she could smell was the generic scent of fabric softener. She could not explain why her eyes suddenly filled with tears or the heaviness in her heart.

She got up and rummaged in her dresser till she found what she was looking for.

Pulling off Steven's shirt, she folded it neatly and placed it at the bottom of the drawer.

Gently, almost reverently, she slipped on the Star Wars one she had pulled out earlier, and wrapped it close around her body.

Within minutes she had fallen asleep.