1Ranma Onehalf: First steps. Book Five.
Chapter Five.
Graduation Day dawned bright and clear over Nerima, without a cloud in the sky and the temperature around 23º C (1).
'YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
This being Nerima of course there was also random insanity.
"WHERE'S MY UNDERWEAR!"
Centered on the Saotome household.
"I got it." Akane said as she got up from the table. "You check the laundry room."
"Right." answered Ranma as he got up. "Sounds like we got a panty thief on the loose." he added with an annoyed scowl and a sigh.
Stepping past Mamimi and Christian he headed straight to the laundry room and the baskets sitting on top of the dryer and washer. Pawing his way through the clothes Ranma found that his, Akanes, Matokos, Christians, and Mamimis inner apparel was unmolested.
But notably absent was Lias. As he checked the other baskets to make sure his leg bumped into a basket on the floor. Glancing down he saw that there were three more baskets on the floor.
Scratching his head he wondered why they had extra baskets when he remembered that Naota, Kenji, and Bre had dropped their laundry off after Kamone had put the Sano washer out of commission.
"Might as well check them." thought Ranma with a shrug. "You never know."
After digging through them Ranma had came to a conclusion: Not only was their panty thief suicidal (For grabbing Lias underwear) but he was blind and terminally stupid (He had swiped Bres underwear and Naotas boxers.)
"Knock, knock."
Ranma looked up and was surprised to see Naota standing in the door of the laundry room.
"When did you get here?" asked Ranma. "And without my knowing?"
"Just now, using my m4d n1nj4 sk1llz" answered Naota with a feline smirk. "How else?"
"How about the front door and using the doorbell?" suggested Ranma. "In this house your 'm4d n1nj4 sk1llz' could get you malleted."
"That's one of the dangers you have to face being a ninja." Naota said with a nod. "Anyways, Is my laundry done? I need my uniform."
"Kay." Ranma said as he slid Naotas basket over to him. "By the way, on your way over did you see anyone with a sack?"
"Nope." answered Naota as he dug his jacket and pants out of the basket. "Why do you ask? And also, where the hell are my boxers?"
"Your underwear is probably the same place as your sisters and Lias." answered Ranma. Crossing his arms he added "We got a panty thief."
Naota blinked twice. "I thought Happosai was dead." he said.
"He is." Ranma answered. "Those female Marines on Okinawa made sure of that." he said as he kicked a basket. "Besides, Happi didn't go for boxers."
"You're right. He didn't." Naota said with a nod as his pocket trilled. "My dad told me about him-hold on a second."
Taking his cell phone out Naota flipped open the display, which read 'Bre'. Pressing the talk button he put the phone to his ear.
"Hey Bre, what's up?" he asked. He listened to her response, nodding a couple off time. "Yeah I know. He hit here too. Grabbed yours, Lias, and mine." he answered. He nodded a few more time before a puzzled look came over his face. "What do mean get them back? If he's swiping underwear do you really want them back?"
Bres answer made him blink in surprise and a thoroughly confused look come over his face. "Look out the window- hold on." he said as he turned around and walked to the main room. Behind him a curious Ranma followed. "Where are they- near Kurikan(2)? Wait- I see em'."
"Where?" Ranma asked as he scanned the sky.
"There." Naota said as he pointed.
Following Naotas finger Ranma saw two large kites flying free in the sky, with unusually large tails. Squinting to make out detail Ranma saw that the second of the two was made out of white multicolored triangles and the first was made out of darker triangles-
"He used them to make the tails?" Ranma asked. "Why on Earth would he do that?"
"And more importantly, how are we gonna get two loose kites down?" asked Naota as he watched the two shapes flit over Nerima.
"That wasn't supposed to happen."
It was said under Christians breath, low enough that it wouldn't be picked up by Neko -ken Improved hearing. But Naotas demonic hearing picked it up easily and he whirled to face Christian.
"Excuse me?" he asked calmly. "What wasn't supposed to happen?"
Christian froze like he was a deer in headlights as Ranma turned around to face him.
"Christian, did you do this?" Ranma asked, pointing to the kits fluttering over the horizon.
"Ahhh..." was Christians answer as he tried to find something to say. "Maybe?" he suggested, which got a snarl from Naota as his chi began to flare to life.
"Settle down." Ranma said as his hand lashed out and jabbed several of Naotas pressure points, shutting down his battle aura and locking up his muscles. Looking at Christian he crossed his arms and sighed. "I'm waiting." he said.
Seeing that he wasn't about to get killed Christian nodded. Rolling his eyes Ranma shook his head and massaged his temples.
"Okay, why did you do it?" he asked.
"Because I wanted to see if I could beat Naotas ninja skills and his demon senses." Christian said with a shrug.
"By swiping his, Lias, and Bres underwear?" Ranma asked.
"I was gonna try and return 'em under his nose." Christian answered.
"So why the kites?"
"Eh, I was bored." was Christians nonchalant reply.
Groaning Ranma shook his head again and pointed to the front door. "Both of you, outside." he said. "We'll talk about this later." Ranma added. Seeing their surprised looks he pointed again. "Now, before Lia finds out."
That got the two in gear and they hauled out of there. Ranma waited until he heard the gate slam before tapping some of Naotas pressure points, unlocking his jaw muscles.
"What was that for?" asked Naota.
"I really would like to have Christian reach his tenth birthday, ok?" answered ranma as he began to unlock the rest of Naotas muscles. "He tries to get himself killed enough times on his own. He doesn't need help."
Flexing his muscles experimentally Naota nodded. "Okay." he said. "So how are you going to punish him?"
Ranma sighed as he scratched his head while he thought for a moment. "Frankly, I don't think this is a punishing offense." he said. "He was trying to improve his skills, so I'll try to point him in a better direction."
"So how are you going to get Bre and Lia to accept that?" asked Naota. "Without them killing you?"
"I really don't know Naota." sighed Ranma. " I really don't know."
A sudden spike in the volume upstairs told the two of them that Lia had spotted the kites. Wincing Ranma thought for a second, then turned to Naota.
"Hey, go upstairs and calm her down." he said.
"Why me?" asked Naota, fearing for his safety.
"Because I'm going to be making a panty run, and besides, you're going to be the one marrying her." Ranma answered. "You'll need to know how to do that."
"Gee, thanks." Naota said.
"You're welcome." Ranma said as he headed to the door.
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Naota hummed a tune that had popped into his head as he, Kenji, Hideo, and their friends walked down the street to Furinkan. The sky was blue, the birds were singing, there wasn't a cloud in the sky, Hideo so far hadn't gotten himself into trouble, and to top it off, today they were being freed from their incarceration at Furinkan.
"Gentlemen, I must say that today is well and truly perfect." Naota said as he spotted an airliner crawling across the sky.
"That it is Naota." Hideo agreed. "How else would any day that starts off with the finest display of panty thievery since Happosai turn out?"
Naota rolled his eyes as they turned onto the street that ran in front of Furinkan. Digging into his pocket he palmed the five industrial ball bearings he had in there and kept them in his fist.
"Gonna buy something?" Kenji asked.
"Nah. Just a little something for our esteemed Principal Kuno." said Naota, holding up a bearing between his thumb and forefinger. "Christian taught me a neat little chi -infusing trick the other day. You infuse your chi into a object, and when it connects the chi gets transferred to what it hit."
"So it's a chi -bomb." Hideo interjected.
"Basically, yeah it is." Naota answered with a nod. "But in practice its like a beanbag round(3)."
"Cool." Hideo said.
"Definitely." Naota said with a grin. "Watch." he said as he looked up.
The object of his attention was an airborne pineapple flying in a high ballistic arc towards them. They all recognized it as not a piece of fruit but one of Principal Kunos pineapple bombs. They had rarely been on the receiving end of them for three reasons: One, one of their number was a ninja. Two, there were far more interesting students then them to pick on. And three, they were usually in close proximity to Hideo, who could be carrying Kami knows what.
As the pineapple reached its apogee Naota curled his forefinger around the tip of his thumb with the ball bearing resting in the crook, much like you would load a shooter in a game of marbles. When the pineapple reached apogee Naota flicked his thumb and the marble was sent shooting into the sky and out of sight.
"You missed-" Hideo started to say before the pineapple disappeared in a explosion of gunpowder.
"I don't miss." said Naota to Hideo with a smirk.
"Okay Hideo, pay up." Echiro said, smacking him on the shoulder.
"It was fixed." Hideo grumbled as he dug into his pockets.
'Bitch, bitch, bitch." retorted Echiro. "Now gimme."
Snorting in amusement Naota shook his head as they continued on to Furinkan. As they walked he saw Kenji looking out of it and knew he was pondering something.
"Thinking of something Kenji?" he asked.
"Yeah." Kenji replied, "What about the female population of Furinkan? What are you going to do about them?" he asked.
"My warped, perverse nature shall keep them at bay!" Hideo said, striking a heroic pose.
"Why does that fill me with a feeling of dread?" Kenji said to no one in particular.
"Oh, come on." Naota said. "It's graduation. What could he possibly do?"
"Do I have to remind you of the Great Japanese Panty Raid?" Kenji said. "Or the Girls Shower Room Incident? Or the School Uniform Redesign Contest?" he continued, counting each off on his fingers. "I don't know about you, but I'm not that good at running away from angry mobs."
"What? With those long legs of yours you can out run- ow!" said Hideo before Echiro smacked him upside the head.
Sniffing the air Naota frowned as Furinkan came into view.
"I smell smoke." he said.
"Maybe the underclassmen celebrating Fruit -for -Brains retirement by torching the school?" Echiro suggested as they walked.
"They must've been prepared, because I smell roast pig." Naota said as he sniffed the air again. "And a lot of them." he added as his stomach grumbled.
"So what are we waiting for? Lets go!" Hideo said before breaking into a sprint. "Last one there buys the soda!"
"Like hell you are!" Naota shot back as he lit out after Hideo.
The rest of the guys charged off as well, leaving Kenji standing in their dust. Shaking his head he walked over to the two meter(4) and with a jump clambered over it with little difficulty. Landing on the other side Kenji smiled as he straitened up and dusted himself off.
He might not be a an incredibly powerful martial artist or a tai -yokai but he could make do. Getting his bearings he sauntered off towards the barbeque pits while the others ran afoul of the mob waiting for Naota at the gates.
As he threaded his way through the crowd he saw that everything was had been done in a tropical theme, complete down to palm trees, sand, Tiki torches, and coconuts. Obviously their much maligned Principal had decided to make his send off a giant luau.
"Kenji!"
Kenji looked up at the calling of his name to see Matoko waving at him as she threaded her way through the crowd over to him.
"Hi Matoko." Kenji said as she came up to him. "Have you tried the barbeque? It's delicious."
"I will." Matoko said as she took a napkin out of a dispenser. "But there's something I have to take care of first."
Taking the napkin Matoko dabbed a spot of barbeque sauce off of Kenjis chin. As she disposed of the napkin Kenji all of a sudden felt a bit warm under the collar. Taking a sip of his drink he glanced around the schoolyard be fore turning his attention back to Matoko.
"S-so where's Lia?" he asked.
"Lia?" Matoko asked. "I actually don't know. She invoked the Umi -Sen -Ken right before we arrived and I haven't seen her since."
"Actually, I'm right here." Lias voice whispered out of thin air, making Matoko jump. "Sorry Matoko. I'm just trying to avoid those yearbook committee bakas."
Matoko nodded as she tried to get her heart rate under control. Seeing Kenji looking completely nonplussed she arced an eyebrow.
"How come you're not surprised Kenji?" she asked.
Kenji shrugged in reply, being busy munching on the rest of his barbeque. "I grew up with Naota and Hideo." he answered. "After that, very little surprises me."
"Speaking of Naota, I assume he's probably in the middle of that mob over by the main gate?" Lia asked from thin air as Matoko nodded.
Kenji nodded in reply, his mouth again too full of barbeque.
"You two have fun." Lia said. "I'm going to go rescue my mate."
"See you at the ceremony." Matoko said as she grabbed another napkin. "Kenji, be careful, or you'll get sauce all over your uniform..."
Casually padding past her classmates Lia went unnoticed as she threaded her way over to where the mob of girls and presumably Naota were. Once she reached the edge of the crowd of spectators she stopped to take stock of the situation.
Lia could quite clearly see that Naota and his friends were in a quandary: They were quite literally surrounded by a mob of girls, each fighting over who would get to talk to Naota, walk with him, etc.
Naota could have quite easily fought them off or escaped, but that would have mean showing that he was a highly skilled and experienced martial artist, something he hadn't ever shown before and would result in way too many questions being asked.
Lia thought the situation over for a few seconds, trying to think of how to help Naota when inspiration struck: Naota might not be able to do anything, but Lia the Anti -Pervert could.
Dropping the Umi -Sen -Ken Lia called up her battle aura as she stepped out into the open. A quick tweak of chi flows and it went from it's normal white to angry red. Another tweak and she infused her pigtail with chi as well, causing it to lift up and wreath about like a giant red snake while her tail fur stood on end for added dramatic effect.
Behind her Lia could hear the rest of the student body clear out when they saw how 'angry' she was. With slow and deliberate steps she advanced on the mob, glowing like a torch. Stopping at a distance of five meters she planted her feet and gave them a glare that would melt steel.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" Lia bellowed at the tops of her lungs as she used her chi to project her voice.
The mob stopped what they were doing when they heard Lias shout. They all began to slowly back away as they realized that Lia was about to reach critical mass. As the crowd parted in front of her naota, Hideo, and the rest of his friends came into view.
Seeing his cue Naota held up his hands in a placating gesture and tried to talk his way out of it. His friends however weren't aware that they were going to be part of the act and so could be excused for gibbering like idiots while they sweated bullets.
"Ah, Lia, it's not what you think..." Naota said in a convincingly shaky voice. "I-I didn't know that they were going to have a cat fight-ohshitIshouldn'thavesaidthat."
Lias right eye twitched in a nasty facial tic as the whole world went silent for several long seconds. Then the silence was broken by the sounds of all the birds in Nerima taking flight as every dog in town started barking as Lias aura expanded and went several shades of red deeper.
"c-CATFIGHT!" she screeched.
"Wait! That was a bad choice of words!" Naota shouted but it was too late.
Raising her arms above her head Lia put the heels of hands together and cupped them as a spark formed there. "PERRRR..." The spark flashed a few times before solidifying into a white ball of chi. "...VERRRT..." she continued as the ball expanded to the size of a softball "SMASHER!" Lia finished as she brought her arms down in front of her and fired off the chi blast.
Behind him the others dove desperately out of the way as Naota stood stock still, seemingly rooted in place as the glowing white ball of energy flew at him. It impacted at his feet and exploded with a flash and a bang.
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Bre jumped when she heard the explosion as beside her Evans chuckled.
"Chill Bre. That was a Pervert Smasher." he said as they walked along.
"A what?" Bre asked, not sure if she'd heard him correctly.
"A Pervert Smasher." Evans repeated. "It's a chi attack. Someone must something with Lia." he added as Bre squinted up into the sky. "You see something?"
"Yeah. I think it's the dumbass who tried to mess with Lia." Bre said as she shielded her eyes against the sun with her right hand and pointed upwards with her left. "Up there."
Evans shielded his eyes and looked up in the sky. It took him a moment before he was able to locate what Bre was pointing at. "I see him." he said. "I think he's headed towards us."
'You think?" Bre asked as she watched the figure continue to go up into the sky and then stop. He seemed to hang there for a moment before he started coming back down towards them. "Hey, I think you're right Evans." Bre said. "He is coming towards us."
"Told ya." Evans answered as they watched the figure fall. "Though I think we should back up a bit, just in case."
"Probably a good idea." Bre said as they took several steps back as the figure hurtled to earth. As he came closer Bre scowled as the distinct feature of a tail resolved into focus. "Hey, that's my little bro."
"Huh- hey, you're right!" Evans said as he took a better look. "What's he doing up there?" he asked .
"Dunno." Bre said with a shrug. "Lets ask him when he lands."
They watched as Naota fell to earth, wincing when he impacted the unforgiving concrete. Opening her eyes Bre saw instead of her brother lying a large crater in the concrete her brother standing in the midst of a pile smashed and broken chunks of cement cooly dusting himself off.
"Ah, you okay?" she asked.
"I'm good." Naota said nonchalantly as he stepped out of the rubble. "How about you?" he asked.
"I'm fine, thanks for asking." Bre said as she looked at her brother, who was apparently had survived his fall without a scratch. "But how did you that?" she asked, pointing to the patch of destroyed street.
"Huh? Oh, that." Naota said as he looked behind him. "That's easy Bre. Don't you know that cats always land on their feet?"
Shaking her head Bre sighed. "Oh brother..." she groaned.
"That's what I am." answered Naota with a grin. Turning to Evans he quirked an eyebrow. "hey, Evans, what with the soldier boy getup?"
"Eh? Oh, my class A's." Evans said. "It's required for all formal occasions, which Lia and Matoko graduating definitely qualifies."
"Ah." answered Naota with a shrug. "Anyways, lets get going before the fun starts."
As they started walking Bre gave her brother an amused look. "Oh, like getting knocked into the stratosphere is dull." she said in a deadpan voice.
Naota shrugged as he put his hands into his pockets. "Eh, once you've did one suborbital flight the novelty wears off quick." he said casually.
That made Bres eyebrows perk up. "This has happened before?" she asked.
"Yeah." was Naotas reply. "When we first met. I had been taking care of a hidden camera and she'd picked up my scent and chased me through the AC ducts." he added. "When we ran into each other after school she was still ticked at me and used her Pervert Smasher on me. Blew me ass over teakettle into a canal five blocks over."
That surprised Bre even more. "You were human then, right?" she asked as Naota nodded. "So how did you survive that?" she asked.
"Bre, I grew up in Nerima. That stuff is normal around here." he said.
"As well as in Akihabara and Hinta..." Evans added. "I'm surprised the Tokyo Police Department's Cataclysm Division isn't more active around here."
Naota snorted derisively as they neared Furinkan. "Those guys mechas wouldn't last five seconds here." he said. "They just try to contain it to this ward and leave it at that."
"Every day, this place gets a little stranger..." Bre muttered in English under her breath.
"What did you say?" Naota asked, his English still being not up to par.
"Nothing." Bre said. "Just remembered I have to E-mail someone today."
"Kay." Naota said as they entered Furinkans gates. "I wonder where Kenji is...?" he mused to himself as he scanned the schoolyard.
Naota didn't see Kenji, or for that matter Matoko. But what he did see was a familiar hundred and ninety five centimeter tall figure in a white dress shirt and slacks with his suit jacket slung over one shoulder.
His mouth quirked into a grin Naota chuckled. "Now there's someone I haven't seen in a while." he said.
"Who? That guy?" asked Bre as she pointed at the man Naota was looking at.
"Yep." Naota said as he altered course to intercept the man.
"So who is that?" asked Bre as she and Evans followed suit.
"That's Takata, Kenjis big brother." Naota answered. "Hey! Flagpole!" he shouted.
Takata, hearing Naotas shout turned around. From the front he was very similar to Kenji in build and appearance, with Takata being broader in the shoulder and more muscular than his brother.
He also carried himself differently than his brother as well. Where Kenji was cautious and uncertain Takatas bearing was strong and confident. His eyes twinkled merrily and from his expression you got the feeling that he was privy to something you weren't.
When he saw Naota Takata did a double take before his face split into a huge grin.
"Naota! Long time no see!" he said as he walked over to greet Naota.
"Likewise." Naota answered. "I didn't know you were going to be here." he added as Takata shrugged.
"Eh, I went to lunch and 'forgot' my cellphone at the office." Takata answered. Taking a look at Bre and Evans he arced an eyebrow. "And who are your friends here? They look a little too old to be students here." he said. "Or at least one of them is." he added as he looked at Bre.
As Bre stifled a giggle Naota scowled slightly and Evans narrowed his eyes.
"Takata, meet my sister Bre." Naota said, pointing to his sister. "And he is Sergeant Major William Evans." he added, pointing to Evans who was looking slightly perplexed.
"Oh." Takata said as he realized what Naotas reaction had been about. "Well, it's nice to meet you." he said as he extended his hand to Bre and Evans.
"Likewise." Bre said as she took Takatas hand.
'Same here." Evans echoed when he shook Takatas hand.
"So, where's Stringbean gotten off to?" Takata asked Naota.
"Dunno." Naota answered with a shrug. "I had my hands full, so I didn't see where he got off to." he said.
"He's probably with Matoko." Bre said as they walked through the crowd. "So lets go wherever she would go."
"Matoko?" Takata arced an eyebrow as he looked at Naota. "Are you holding out on me?" he asked. "Did my little brother get a girl? Has hell finally frozen over?"
Naotas ears folded halfway back in a gesture that Takata took to be a feline shrug.
"With those two, it's hard to tell." was his reply to Takatas questions. "I frankly think it's a miracle that Kenji is even able to talk to a girl." he added.
"I think 'miracle' is a perfect term to describe it." Takata said. "Though getting Kenji to admit anything about how he feels is like pulling teeth."
Naotas ears folded all the way back and his lips curled up into a half -snarl. "Well, we know who to thank for that." he rumbled as the whites of his eyes flashed red.
Takata frowned as the recent actions of he and Kenjis father came to the fore. "How is Kenji by the way? Is his wrist okay? Can he still draw?" he asked. "And you're making sure he eats, right?"
Naota nodded in reply. "His wrist is fine. In fact, he's drawing more than ever." he said in a low voice. "And I make sure he eats."
"Good." Takata nodded before rubbing his hands together and smiling mischievously. "Now, lets go find Stringbean. I've got to meet the girl who's grabbed his attention."
Naota chuckled evilly and pointed directly ahead of them. "Follow me then."
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The pounding of large tribal drums reverberated across the schoolyard as the PA system crackled to life. Once everyone's attention had been focused on the PA the voice of Principal Kuno came on.
"Hey! Listen up! Dis' is da Big Kahuna." he began. " De' graduation is bout to start, so yo got ten minutes ta' get ya keisters to da' auditorium or ya gets a demerit..." he added, punctuating his threat with the 'snip snip' of scissors.
"Who the hell was that?" Bre asked as everyone began to walk to the auditorium.
Beside her Evans sighed and rubbed his temples in aggravation. "That, Bre was Principal Kuno in all of his idiocy." he explained.
"You're kidding, right?" Bre asked. "They let a loon like that run a high school- wait a minute, this is Nerima. Of course they would." she said with a roll of her eyes.
"Exactly." Evans said with a nod. Seeing that they were out of hearing range of those who could speak English he switched for some privacy. "Hey Bre, I have a question."
"Yeah?" asked Bre, switching to English as well.
"What are you doing Friday night?" he asked.
"Not much. Why do you ask?" answered Bre, who had an inkling where Evans was heading with his questions.
"You want to catch a movie? In English?" Evans asked.
Bre blinked before she nodded. "Sure." she said. "What time?"
"How about eighteen hund- sorry, six o'clock?" Evans suggested as Bre giggled at Evans correction of himself.
"That's fine by me." Bre said as she tried to keep from smiling too hard. "I'm glad there's someone around here who isn't clueless." she added mentally as they walked into the auditorium.
Taking their seats with the Saotomes (and lone Mashida) they sat back and engaged in idle chit -chat until the lights dimmed. The stage was brightly lit with a podium standing in the center with several spotlights shining on it.
Normally this would have given it a formal tone, as it was meant for a graduation. Unfortunately the whole thing was ruined by the sand and potted palm trees that had been set up to make a faux beach, with lounge chairs for the faculty to sit on with tiki torches as decoration.
Striding up to the platform Principal Kuno stood ramrod straight and tried to look as possible (5)
but failing miserably. Clearing his throat he spoke into the microphone.
"Hey now kikkis, before we get to handin' out de diplomas I's gonna treat ya to a little island muzak..." he said as he lifted his ukelele.
But he only got one note off before a spotlight fell on him out of the rafters overhead. There was stunned silence for a few moments then slowly the entire student body broke into applause.
Standing with the rest of his class Naota smirked as he pocketed his remaining ball bearings and looked as innocent as possible as Kenji looked at him out of the corner of his eye.
Once the applause had died down the assistant principal, a long suffering woman who was absolutely delighted that Principal 'Pineapple Brain' Kuno was retiring took the microphone from the podium and moved to the table where the diplomas were stacked.
"Thank you for that speech, Principal Kuno. Your parting words shall be remembered fondly." she said, getting a chuckle from the audience. "Now, let us begin the important work of setting our graduates out onto the path of life."
As the soon to be former vice -principal began to call out their names the students began to walk up to receive their diplomas before walking across the stage and out into the audience to join their families, steering well clear of the spotlight embedded in the floor.
Everything went well until it was Lias turn. The vice -principal called out 'Saotome, Lia." And she stepped out and walked up to the stage. She took her diploma, shook the vice -principals hand, and started to walk to the other side of the stage.
From Naotas point of view he saw her stop and look at the spotlight, then jump back as the area behind the podium erupted into a shower of splinters as Principal Kuno erupted out of the hole brandishing a pair of shears.
With the exception of the few high -level martial artists in the audience what happened next was a blur. One moment Principal Kuno was looming above Lia, laughing like a maniac. Then next moment there was a wham and the Principal shot through the roof (presumably into LEO).
For the aforementioned martial artists, what they saw was completely different. With a casual swipe of her hand Lia cut Principal Kunos shears into nine different pieces(6) with her left hand while tossing her diploma case up into the air with her right.
Lia began to twist as she summoned a mallet from Hammerspace into her right hand. Grabbing it with her left hand as well Lia spun counterclockwise in a circle, swinging the mallet out into a wide arc as she put her chi into it.
As she came around Lia swung it up, the head connecting with the underside of Kunos jaw in a vicious upper cut. A millisecond later the chi that had been directed into the head of the mallet went off, quadrupling the force of the blow and producing the wham heard by the rest of the audience.
And the rest as they say, was history. Kuno was propelled up through the roof and out over the schoolyard in a high ballistic arc, eventually coming down in the yard of the Kuno mansion.
Back in the auditorium Lia released the mallet back into Hammerspace and dusted her hands.
"Nice try Pineapple Brain." she said as she glanced up at the hole she'd made in the ceiling. "But you're way too slow." she added as she flashed a grin at her parents.
When it was Kenjis turn not surprisingly nothing odd happened, which meant that when Naota came on after him he was extra alert.
That turned out to be a good thing, because the instant he stepped off the stage Naota was mobbed by girls(7).
"Naota -kun, sign my yearbook please?"
"Naota -kun, what are you doing after graduation?"
"Are you-"
"Can I-"
"Naota-"
Looking over the heads of the mob Naota saw Kenji standing at the edge, trying to get a look into the crowd. Raising his arm Naota made the 'devils horns'(8) with his hand.
Kenji saw the signal and went into action. Wading into the mob he started to push aside girls as he tried to get to Naota.
"Excuse me." he said. "Coming through."
Being an 'ubergeek' the girls reactions were immediate: They shrieked and tried to get away from him. That's exactly when Kenji 'tripped' and fell headlong into the mass of girls.
There was much shrieking and cries of outrage as the scrambled to get out of the way, providing the perfect opportunity for Naota to escape. By the time Kenji had picked himself up and dusted himself off Naota was long gone.
While the mob of girls stood around and tried to figure out where naota could have gotten to Kenji slipped away and went into the grandstands where Matoko waited for him.
Sitting down in the darkness Matoko leaned over to him and nudged him in the ribs.
"Nicely done." she said in his ear before giving him a peck on the cheek as Naota waved to him from his spot next to Lia.
Kenji waved back and was grateful for the darkened auditorium, for noone could see his cheeks burn.
The rest of the graduates got their diplomas without incident and then the lights on the stage darkened as the valedictorian came up to the podium.
"And now," he began "I present to you the notable people of the class of 2018."
Behind him the logo of the yearbook committee appeared behind him on the large projection screen. It stayed there a moment then disappeared as the valedictorian checked his notes.
"For this year we added a new category to the list. The first of which is 'Cutest Couple'." he continued.
Up in the bleachers Naota groaned while Lia buried her face in her hands.
"And that honor goes to, not surprisingly, two of our most high -profile members: Naota Sano and Lia Saotome." said the valedictorian as their yearbook photos appeared behind him on the overhead.
"And for 'Person Most Likely to Succeed' this year it's a tie, so we decided to award to both of the nominees." he said. "So, to that end the winners are our own in -house manga team, Kenji Mashida and Matoko Saotome."
Matoko and Kenji stared slack -jawed as their yearbook photos came up on the overhead and everyone around them gave their congratulations.
From there on everything was blur until they finally left the auditorium. Kenji and Matoko were walking in a daze while Lia and Naota herded them out of the way of the rest of the crowd.
"That was a surprise." Naota said as he guided Kenji to a chair. "Both of them getting picked?"
"I agree." said Lia as she sat Matoko down. "But for that 'Cutest Couple' BS, ooohh are they gonna pay!" she added as she made a fist.
Naota chuckled at the visions of mayhem that sprang to mind at Lias statement, along with something else.
"I know, but before you kill them, you owe me something." he said.
Lia turned and gave Naota a quizzical look.
"Owe you what?" she asked.
"This." answered Naota before he scooped her up into a hug and a kiss.
"After them!" someone in the crowd shouted.
Ranma and Akane watched as the mob charged through the door and was gone. Once the dust had cleared and everyone had begun to go back to what they were doing Ranma smirked and looked around to make sure no would be able to overhear them.
"So, What's the plan you two?" he asked in a low voice.
"Everyone's gonna meet up at Naotas place for a party." Lias voice came out of thin air.
Suppressing the instinct to tell Lia to be home by curfew Ranma nodded. "Have fun." he said. "And stay out of trouble."
"We'll do our best." Naotas voice came from nowhere. "Later."
Ranma watched as unseen hands shook Kenji and Matoko out of their stupor. They got up and walked out of the auditorium, the door holding open a few seconds longer than normal.
When the door closed Ranma sighed and looked at the floor as Akane rubbed his back.
"Your little girls have grown up Ranma." said Akane. "They do that."
"I know." answered Ranma with a sigh. "But they'll always be that way, even when they have kids of their own."
"I know." Akane said as she gave Ranma a hug.
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End.
(1)That's about 75° Fahrenheit
(2)Christian and Mamimis elementary school.
(3)That's a kevlar bag, filled with lead and fired from a shotgun. It's used to knock down suspects and subdue them with minimal injury.
(4)That's six and a half feet.
(5)Which is impossible to do while holding a ukelele and having a palm tree on top of your head.
(6)Just because I'm a bit of an anal -restive, allow me to explain that. If Lia was using her finger from the index to the pinky fingers and aiming for the middle, that would get you four cuts. That's eight pieces from the two blade of the shears and one piece from where they connect. Simple, no?
(7) Much to Lias fury.
(8) Ozzy! Ozzy!
Authors Note: Sorry about the huge delay in updating, but I had a moving situation thrust upon me, much to my chagrin. Basically both of my comps have been disassembled for the past couple of weeks and the one I'm writing this on isn't the one I normally write on.
So after going through all my stuff I managed to locate my backup disk and I was able to finish this chapter. On the plus side the delay helped me get over the writers block I had before the move.
I should get Internet in September (hopefully) but I can post at my city library in the meantime, so keeps your eyes out for new postings.
Thank you for your patience.
Zombie Boy.
