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CHAPTER 53
RPOV
Seeing as Dimitri was almost eighteen years old, he was tried as an adult. It shouldn't have come as a surprise, but I was still outraged when they sentenced him to six years in prison for voluntary manslaughter. It was a small victory, his lawyer had said to us, because if he'd been convicted of first-degree murder he would be worse off.
I realized that was true, but I was still very much upset that both the jury and the judge had ignored the fact that Dimitri's father had been an abusive and manipulating man – never mind the fact that Kazimir had tried to kill us first. And nothing would've happened if Dimitri hadn't found Kazimir that night in his own home, where the man had threatened his sister.
I still didn't know what exactly had happened hat night. I hadn't been allowed to go to his trial because it would've put too much stress on me and I still needed to heal from my accident according to my doctor. The only times my parents had acquiesced was when I'd been called upon as a witness – which actually meant they had no choice than to let me go – and when they'd found Dimitri guilty.
Seeing as I hadn't witnessed the murder itself, my only job had been to convince the jury that Dimitri was not a violent person, that he had been provoked the night of the murder. I'd also told them how Kazimir had been threatening Dimitri's family for months now. Our advantage had been that I'd been present during one of Kazimir's visits to the Belikovs. When my part was done, my parents had taken me home and I never got to hear what had played out that horrible night.
Dimitri never talked about it. We already had limited time together anyway so I didn't feel like bringing it up either. Aside from that, Dimitri was growing more and more distant with each visit and I was afraid that I might screw it up completely if I dared to ask about that night. Maybe he didn't want me to see him behind bars, but I told him every time I visited him that I loved him and that I wasn't going anywhere.
Today was the first time I was going to visit him since they'd found him guilty so I was a little bit nervous. Olena had visited him the day before and had told me he was doing okay, but I was pretty sure Dimitri had just lied to make sure his mother wouldn't worry about him too much. I couldn't blame him. Olena had been a mess since his arrest. Sonya had moved back home to help running the household and Karolina visited regularly. Viktoria was in therapy and I hoped it would help her because she still wasn't speaking much. They were all so devastated and I wished there was a way to comfort them, but unfortunately there was nothing I could do for them.
Dimitri was already sitting behind the glassed wall when I walked into the room. A guard escorted me to my seat and then backed up against the far wall. I offered Dimitri a smile, but he didn't return it. His hair was tied back into a ponytail. His eyes looked tired and there was stubble on his jaw. I still wasn't used to him wearing an orange jumpsuit. He looked awful, but I bet he was going to tell me he was doing just fine. I just wished he'd realize he didn't have to pretend with me. I picked up the phone and held it to my ear. He did the same.
"Hi," I breathed.
"Hey," he answered.
There was a brief silence as I stared at him. "How are you holding up?" I asked at last.
"I'm doing fine, Roza," he responded quietly, though he couldn't meet my eyes. He cleared his throat and finally looked up at me. "How are you doing?"
"I'm okay," I told him.
He looked me over. "Are you sure? Because our friends just graduated from high school and you weren't there to celebrate with them."
I shrugged. "That's not important right now."
He shook his head, sighing. "You should've been there as well. You should've graduated this year. You would have if it hadn't been for my father." He spat the last word, scowling.
"Dimitri, it's okay," I insisted. "I'll graduate next year." I gave him a sad smile. "Though I wish I could've graduated with you."
He said nothing.
I suppressed a sigh and looked around, desperate for a change of subject. "How's your cellmate? Is he… Is he a nice guy?" As the words slipped out of my mouth, I realized this wasn't an ideal topic either. I closed my eyes, silently cursing myself. "I mean-"
"He's alright," Dimitri interrupted. "His name's Ivan."
I was relieved to hear that. I would hate it if Dimitri's cellmate was an asshole. Every time I came here, I was scared that someone would've beaten him up and that I would see him covered in bruises, but so far nothing had happened. I was glad that he might've made a friend in here, someone who could protect him. But what did the guy do to end up here? Did he commit a murder?
"Do you know what he's in for?" I asked hesitantly.
"No. We don't really talk about that here," he answered, clearing his throat again, as his eyes drifted elsewhere. He really had a hard time looking at me.
"Well, as long as he's nice to you," I said, not sure what else to say.
Why was this so awkward? Why wouldn't he look me in the eye? It felt like something had changed between us and I didn't know what caused it. I thought he'd be happy to see me, but it didn't seem like it. Was he afraid I wouldn't want him anymore now that he was in prison? Was that the reason he was being so distant?
"So when are they going to remove your cast?" Dimitri asked suddenly.
"In two weeks," I answered, relieved that he was talking again. "I can't wait to get rid of this thing."
He looked up at me again. There was a faint smile playing on his lips. "I'm glad you're doing better now. Are you making any progress with your memory?"
"A little," I told him. "But it's very slow."
He nodded. "It'll get better, Roza."
I forced a smile onto my face. I honestly didn't know if it would get much better, but I didn't want him to worry about me. He already had enough to deal with. As he looked at me – really looked at me – for the first time since I arrived here, my smile turned genuine and I put my hand against the glass.
"I've really missed you, comrade," I said softly.
He put his hand on the glass as well. I wished this window wasn't separating us. I wanted to touch him, even if it was just for the briefest of moments. Just one more time.
"I'm sorry, Roza," he murmured, his eyes filled with regret.
"Why are you sorry? You did what you had to do to protect your family," I told him earnestly. "I understand."
Dimitri shook his head. "That's not what I'm talking about." A pained expression crossed his face as he glanced up again. Slowly, he removed his hand from the glass. "I can't let you come here anymore."
I looked at him in confusion. "W-what do you mean?"
"You can't come here anymore," he repeated, his voice firmer this time. The regret in his eyes had disappeared; now he only looked determined.
"What are you talking about?" I asked, my voice rising in sheer panic.
Dimitri sighed and fixed his gaze on me. "I don't want you to visit me anymore, Rose. You have to move on with your life."
"But that's crazy," I exclaimed. "Dimitri, you can't ask me that. You're my boyfriend."
"I'll be in here for six years, Rose," he retorted. "I don't want you to wait that long for me."
"I told you before… I don't mind. I'll wait as long as it takes," I answered, my eyes pleading. "You can't just send me away. After all we've been through…"
"It's time to let each other go," Dimitri said. He was not budging; he meant every word of it. "You're right. We've been through a lot together, but I can't put you through this as well. I'm letting you go now."
My eyes filled with unshed tears. "You can't do this to me. I love you."
He closed his eyes briefly. "Love is not enough."
I gasped and finally pulled my hand away from the window as well. "How can you say that?"
Dimitri opened his eyes again and looked straight at me. "Rose, I mean it. Don't come here anymore."
"Dimitri, no-"
"How many times do I have to say it before you realize that I don't want you here?" he cut me off, his voice harsh. "I want you to live your life. I want you to move on. It's for the best."
A tear rolled down my cheek and I wiped it away. "Do you mean that?"
He nodded. "Now please leave and don't come back."
My bottom lip quivered, but I refused to cry in front of him. I couldn't believe Dimitri had broken my heart again. The past few months I'd been in all kinds of pain - first the breakup, then the accident and my slow recovery and then Dimitri being found guilty and locked up in prison for the next six years – but none of that compared to the pain I was feeling right now.
Now I finally understood why he'd been so distant. He'd been planning this all along; he'd just been waiting until the right time. Now that he was sure I was doing okay, he wouldn't have to feel too guilty about removing me from his life altogether. Just like when he'd broken up with me the first time, he was taking the choice away from me again. He had made this decision once again all by himself.
I looked at him, searching his eyes, wondering if he knew he was making a mistake. But his eyes gave nothing away. His face hardened as he looked back at me. I wanted to believe it was all an act, but I was not so sure anymore.
I opened my mouth to say something, but he cut me off. "Don't come back."
Without giving me a chance to speak, he hung up the phone and signaled to a guard he was ready to leave. I sat frozen in my seat and watched them lead him away. I called out his name, hoping he would hear me, but he never looked back.
Yep. This was definitely the worst pain I had ever felt. My whole world came crashing in and I couldn't even find the strength to move. I just sat there, staring at the empty seat across from me. He just left. Without a proper goodbye. How could he do that to me?
"Miss, are you alright?"
Startled, I looked up when a guard put a careful hand on my shoulder. I didn't realize I was crying until the man awkwardly handed me a tissue. I let him escort me back to the exit, tears still streaming down my face. How was I going to explain this to my parents, who were waiting for me outside the building? How was I going to tell them that Dimitri dumped me once again?
Easy. You just tell them, a calm voice inside my head told me. You tell them and then you move on. You can do this. You're Rose Hathaway. You can do anything.
What was that saying again? What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. I'd already been through a lot this year and I've always pulled through. I would pull through this pain as well. It might take some time, but no one is going to keep me down, I thought with new resolve as I pushed through the doors and stepped outside of the prison for the very last time.
Not even Dimitri Belikov.
Please read:
Please don't hate me for ending it this way! This chapter might seem like it has a lot of gaps, but I forwarded it a little bit so you wouldn't have to read about a trial because that might get boring. And I know that you were all waiting for an explanation as to what happened when Kazimir was killed and now you're probably all mad that I haven't given it to you yet, lol, for which I am sorry. I can promise you, though, that you'll find your answers in the sequel!
For those who don't feel like reading the sequel, but want to know what happened anyway, I'll post an a/n here when I've uploaded that particular chapter. I'll post another a/n here when I've published the first chapter of the sequel. It's called "Surrender" and it's going to pick up six years after the ending of this story so you can all guess what's coming ;) I'll give you a short summary anyway:
When Dimitri gets released from prison, he goes to find Rose. While Rose seemed to have moved on from the past, she was the only thing on Dimitri's mind the past few years. He's desperate to make things right with her, but after everything that's happened, can he win Rose's heart back?
If you're interested, I'll be posting the first chapter this weekend. Hope to see you guys there! I'd like to thank you all again for reading and reviewing this story! Thank you for sticking with me!
Lots of love!
