All characters named in this story were created by Janet Evanovich, except the rookie cops and the teen gang members and Jacob Stanton (the House Monster), and Patti Basatti (County Clerk), created by AutumnDreaming for this story.
All of Morelli's cop experiences in this story have been creatively adapted from the experiences of Ralph L. Dettweiler, former Sergeant of South Carolina Sheriff's Department, found at
Additional inspiration was gleaned from Charles Martin's novel Chasing Fireflies.
Morelli's POV
By 8 a.m., I was back at the office, printing the invitations on the printer in my office. I was going to have to have these delivered with very short notice, not that that was going to be a problem in the Burg. My problem with deciding who to entrust with this task without offending anyone else. Traditionally, the bride's mother helps the bride with planning the wedding. I considered asking Mrs. Plum, but there was something else they needed from her that was more important.
When I finished with the invitations, I packed up my office – again – and went down the hall to give my written resignation to the Chief. I had done my part. Bell could finish up any residual paperwork that I had left behind.
At nine o'clock, I walked into my mother's house and dropped the bomb. After some initial crying, she agreed to help me. I managed to escape without seeing Grandma Bella.
Even though it was Saturday, and even though I had officially resigned from the police force, I had an emergency court session with the Chief Judge at 10 a.m. Mooch was there to meet me. Varela and three of his gang had been transferred to federal prison on no-contest pleas. There was some kind of mix-up on the paperwork. They were not supposed to be in general population. Within a matter of hours, they were picked off one by one. Varela was last. I guess Ranger's always right. They were murdered by MS-13 gang members, stabbed 13 times.
In light of these developments, the Chief Judge decided to hold the emergency session transferring custody of Lino Pavia to Mooch Morelli at Morelli House on a Saturday in an attempt to avoid any publicity in the media. Pavia had given written and video testimony against Sanders and Boone, but we could not make him testify against Varela. Now we didn't need to.
Because all three of the boys in Mooch's custody were considered to be in danger, the judge had made arrangements for all three to attend a private art school, funding provided by charities to help inner-city kids, and he ordered Mooch to take them personally. Mooch flashed me a look of deepest gratitude. I shook my head, indicating that I had not played any role in this decision. He didn't look like he was buying it.
Mooch escorted Lino out of the courtroom, but I hung around for a few minutes hoping to have a few words with the judge. I explained my desperate need for a marriage license, and even though it was a Saturday, he called the County Clerk at home. He handed me the phone, and she agreed to meet me within the hour. I guess I was still famous for being back from the dead.
At 11:30 a.m., I walked into Clara's Beauty Parlor. Melvin Pickle was currently working as a photographer at the mall. Sally's idea was to have Connie and Lula pretend to assist Melvin with a project photo shoot to showcase his talents. Melvin was hoping to start his own photography studio, and Stephanie knew that this. The story was that Connie, Lula, and Stephanie would model some wedding gowns down at the dock at two o'clock. Connie and Lula were in on it. They twisted her arm, reminding her that she really owed Melvin big for the Stinky Sanders take down. Clara had agreed to make them up free of charge in exchange for some free advertising when Melvin madeit big.
So here they were, having their hair and nails done, surrounded by the usual Burg gossips. Unusually, Mrs. Plum and the County Clerk, Patti Basatti, had joined them. I grinned at Steph's mom, and she waved at me, giving me the "go" signal. Frank and I had arranged some of this over breakfast, and he'd run home to fill in the misses.
I sat and watched, answering questions about recent criminal activity in the Burg, biding my time until the girls had donned their dresses. Connie was wearing an off-white, knee-length number, and Lula was wearing the palest blue micro-mini with a glittery, matching halter-top, set off by her light blue eye shadow and nails. Stephanie emerged last wearing a flowing white wedding gown, and she was beautiful. Even though I wasn't taken completely by surprise, it wasn't hard to play the part.
I stood up and walk towards her, a man smitten. I took her hand in mine and put it to my heart.
"You have to marry me soon," I said.
Her eyes sparkled with amusement. "Does this mean you want to pick a day?"
"Pick a day? We don't even have a marriage license," I said.
Right on cue, Patti jumped up. "I can help you with that," she offered.
"Are you serious?" I asked.
"Of course," she said, rummaging around in her bag. She pulled out a marriage license form and a pen, and placed them on the glass counter by the door. "Just fill these out, and I'll take care of it on Monday."
"What do you say?" I asked Stephanie, not really waiting for an answer. I took the pen and began filling out the form.
"Don't you need to make copies of our identification, birth certificates, and things like that?" Stephanie asked. "I'm sure that when I married Dickie it was quite a process."
"What do you need?" Mrs. Plum asked. She got up and came forward with her purse. "I always carry the girls' birth certificates and things in case of emergencies."
Stephanie's mouth was hanging open, but they didn't give her time to react.
"I need a driver's license, social security card, and birth certificate from each of them, and at least one witness that knows both parties." The room erupted with witnesses offering their signatures. "I can look up Stephanie's divorce decree at the office. And I need $28 cash. Seventy-two hours after I file the paperwork, the marriage license will be mailed to the address you indicate on the form."
"Well," Mrs. Plum beamed. "That's wonderful!" She dug around in her purse, and handed over Stephanie's birth certificate.
"Feel free to use my photocopier," Clara chimed in.
"You may carry my birth certificate around, but I doubt that Joe has his," Stephanie said. I could swear she was breaking out in a sweat as she stood there.
"Sure I do," I said. "Standard procedure."
I pulled out my drivers license, Social Security card, and birth certificate along with two 20's. Clara was kind enough to make change for us. I had filled out my part and Stephanie's part, leaving her only needing to sign the form. Her hand was trembling as she handed over her driver's license and Social Security card. The trembling increased she took the pen and attempted to sign her name. But she did it.
"Seventy-two hours, huh?" she asked Patti.
"Yes. Then you can get married anytime you like, within six months that is."
"Six months?" Stephanie repeated.
"That gives us plenty of time," her mother said, patting her hand. Mrs. Morelli gave me a sly smile, and I could see that she was pleased she wasn't going to have to wait that long.
I had set the alarm on my phone to ring at noon. When it did, I pretended to answer my phone, taking an important call. I excused myself, and walked Patti out, thanking her for taking time out of her Saturday, and inviting her to the wedding. She assured me that I could pick up the license after 12:30.
Nothing about this wedding was being done the way my mother or Stephanie's mother would have had it done. Grandma Bella would have a long list of complaints. She thought all Italian weddings should be done the old-fashioned way. The Italian tradition included the groom standing at the church waiting for the bride holding a bouquet as a present for her. I had always thought that was somewhat romantic, so I went to the florist and, explaining the situation, had a traditional Italian bouquet with a mix of flowers, heavy on the red roses.
At 12:30, I picked up the marriage license from City Hall, where I also managed to rent some tables and chairs to set up on the dock. I called Mooch to meet me with his truck, but he said he was too busy and he couldn't make it. I was flabbergasted. The wedding was in an hour and a half. I insisted, but Mooch held his ground. I was cursing him as I dialed Sally.
I explained the problem, and Sally agreed to come with the bus to help me load up. Apparently Stephanie had driven the Hummer to the beauty parlor, so Sally wasn't going to be playing chauffeur after all.
Sally and I pulled up to the dock at one o'clock, and there was Mooch, Lucas, Joe, and Lino, packing up paint cans and stencils into the back of Mooch's truck.
"Where have you been?" I asked him. "And why aren't you dressed?"
"What you mean? I am dressed," Mooch said, being smart.
"Not for a wedding, you aren't."
"Well, neither are you, and it's your wedding," he said laughing.
He was right. "Fine! I don't care what you're wearing as long as you're here," I said. "I'm going in to change, while you guys unload those tables and chairs. Put them on the dock."
I headed down the dock and onto the boat, stopping short when I saw the bay window on the front of the house. It had been painted, professionally I might add, like a downtown storefront. The edges of the window had been framed with a 3-D effect using several shades of gray, black, and white. In the center of the window, bold white letters with outline appeared to pop out of the window, announcing:
Morelli & Morelli
Detective Agency
Surveillance
Missing Persons
Domestic/Child Custody
Criminal Investigations
Heir/Witness Locates
Risk Management
Background Checks
Consulting
I was stunned. There was no doubt about it. Lino's style was apparent, but clearly Joe and Lucas had helped. The letters were so crisp and clean, all in perfect proportion. I couldn't believe it. I hadn't chosen the name Morelli & Morelli, but I liked it.
I went inside, took a very quick shower, and dress in my best suit. Fifteen minutes later, I was helping tape down the plastic tablecloths when my mother and Grandma Bella arrived. They were bearing gifts, so I pointed out the gift table. My mother was staring out the houseboat, slack-jawed and wide-eyed, apparently taking in the advertising on the front window. She turned on her heels and marched back to the car, and I chased after her.
"Mom!" I called after her. "What's wrong?"
"I had no idea you were planning to live on a boat, Joseph," she said. "If I had known… well, I wouldn't have brought the Morelli family china. I had been planning to hand this down to you and Stephanie, but if you're going to be living on that thing, I think I'll just hang onto it for you until you are better settled."
"Oh," I said, breathing a sigh of relief.
Mom opened the trunk of her car, gently placing the box she was carrying back into a nest of blankets that were acting as padding. Instead, she took out a smaller, cigar shaped box.
"What's that?" I asked.
"I guess you could use the silver, instead." She turned and thrust the box towards me.
I smiled wide. "Stephanie and I would be honored." I offered her my arm and walked her back down the deck to the tables.
Soon we had thecake and punch ready to go, and I was standing at the end of the dock carrying a bouquet of flowers, directing the guests down the dock to the houseboat where my mother was receiving them.
Grandma Bella had forced a piece of iron into my coat pocket for luck. She chided me for not marrying on a Sunday, the luckiest day, and as I looked back up the dock, I caught her laying a broom across the way. I groaned, knowing what she was up to. Traditionally the bride walked to the church, and along the way tests were placed in her path to see what kind of a wife she would be. If she picked up the broom and put it away, she would be a good housekeeper. If the child were crying, and she quieted the child, she would be a good mother. If a beggar crossed her path, and she gave money to him, she had a good heart. This was exactly what I had been afraid of. I could see excitement in Grandma Bella's eyes as Valerie and Albert approached with baby Lisa in tow.
I approached grandma Bella, stooping to pick up the broom. "Take it back inside," I ordered.
"Joseph, you have not allowed us to follow tradition in this. She probably didn't even wear green last night…"
"Stephanie is not going to understand the meanings of these tests, and regardless of whether she passes or fails, she is going to be my wife. And you will love her as you love me, because I've asked you to." I pushed the broom back into her hands. "No more visions, no giving her the eye, and no more superstitious nonsense." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the piece of iron. "Our marriage is not going to be a success or a failure because someone wore the wrong color last night before bed or because I saw the bride before the wedding or because she has her engagement ring on today or because I had a piece of iron in my pocket."
"You have no appreciation for tradition, Joseph." She said, snatching the lump of iron out of my hand and thrusting it back into my jacket pocket.
"I will not tolerate anything being said to Stephanie today that might intimidate her or her cause her to feel in any way that this marriage is a disappointment to my family. Can I be any more clear?"
Both Grandma Bella and my mother stood with jaws agape, staring at me.
"I was not raised to take marriage lightly," I said to my mother. "When these rings are finally on our fingers, and we become one in the eyes of God, then Stephanie has to come first in my life from that moment on. That is what I am promising. Do you want me to be any less of a man than that?"
Slowly, very slowly, my mother approached me, arms outstretched. She took my face in her hands, and then pulled me down to her so she could kiss my forehead. Then she slowly kissed each cheek before letting me go. "I'm losing my son," she whispered.
"Yes," I whispered back.
She nodded, letting me slip free. I pulled her into a hug and kissed her hair. "I will always love you. You're my mother. But it has to be this way. Don't drive Stephanie away, because if you do, I'll have to go with her."
My mother pulled back and nodded slowly. She turned her eyes on Grandma Bella. "He's made up his mind, and we'll respect his decision," she decreed.
"It's about time," Grandma said with a nod of approval. I hadn't expected that. Then, holding her head high and walking back to the house with my mother.
Frank and Mother Plum arrived moments later. I walked down to the house with them, and showed them inside. Mrs. Plum was as shocked at the writing on the front window as my mother had been, but when I explained that I hoped Stephanie and I would be working together from now on, she seemed relieved. I knew shedidn't like Stephanie working for Vinnie. She would rest easier knowing I was with Stephanie and that we were going not to be hunting down fugitives, at least not most of the time.
The guests were arriving now, everyone was ooh-ign and ahh-ing over the house and strange "super cars". My mother was ushering everyone inside. Vinnie and his wife arrived, as did Dickie. I most certainly did not invite Dickie, but there seemed little I can do about it now. I gave him a warning look, but he just smiled his idiotic smile at me.
I breathed a sigh of relief as Joe Juniak arrived in a stretch limo. It's not everyone that gets married by the Governor of New Jersey. Juniak was not only the former police chief, but also the former mayor of Trenton. As such, the current mayor had given him permission to marry us.
Last but not least, Ranger and Tank showed up. It was already two o'clock. Connie, Lula, and Sally already present and accounted for, and they had assured me that Stephanie was right behind them. Tank went inside, but Ranger waited on the dock with me and Mooch. Melvin had set up his camera and was taking a few practice shots of Connie and Lula. There was just a slight breeze, the sky was blue and clear, and the temperature was a perfect 70°.
The minutes ticked by, but still, there was no Stephanie. Traditionally the groom holding the flowers at the church is being teased by his best friends, tortured to think the bride might not show up. Mooch knew this, but I wasn't sure about Ranger. Regardless, it was one of the most irritating traditions I had ever endured.
"Maybe she got lost," Mooch said, poking me in the rib with his elbow.
"Maybe she got cold feet," Ranger mused. "You may have scared her to death with that stunt you pulled to get the license."
"Maybe she's on to you," Mooch said. "Maybe she recognized the cars and took off."
I paced back and forth on the end of the dock as the minutes ticked away. Where could she be?
By 2:20, I was nearly frantic. Had some lunatic come after her? Had she been in a car wreck? Had she seen me standing here in a tuxedo waiting for her and suddenly driven out of state? I gave in to my paranoia and ran to Big Blue, popped the trunk, and checked the GPS. She was about 3 miles away and the signal was stationary.
I went down to the house and had Sally call her. She apparently picked up. Sally listened to her reply, asked her to hurry up because Melvin was waiting for her. He disconnected, and gave me a sad shake of his head. "She says she ran out of gas. Apparently, it's taking her quite a while to get the gas can refilled because everyone wants to know where the bride is off to and why she's carrying a gas can. She can't figure out how she ran out of gas. She said she had plenty of gas last night. I guess that Hummer just sucks gas, huh?" He raised an eyebrow at me. "I don't suppose you filled the Hummer before returning it to her apartment building this morning?"
I slapped the palm of my hand against my forehead. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It was my fault she was late to her own wedding! "No, I don't suppose I did," I groaned.
"You were in such a big hurry to get her here that you left her stranded in her wedding gown!" he laughed. "That's classic."
"Yeah, that'll be one to tell the kids about," Ranger chuckled with sarcasm.
I went back out to the dock to wait, alone. Melvin continued taking pictures of Lula and Connie, and within minutes, Stephanie pulled up. She noticed the cars, and looked around, but she didn't see anyone else, so she got out and walked down to the dock. She smiled when she saw me holding theflowers. I opened my arms and she ran to me, dropping her bag on the dock. I could hear Melvin's camera clicking away in the background. I held her tight and whispered in her ear that I loved her.
She stepped back, and took the flowers from me, and I was rewarded with one of the most beautiful smiles I've ever seen. She seemed to think that I was going to join her in the photo shoot. She had seen me in my suit before, and I savored the last few moments before I had to tip my hand.
"Come here, beautiful," I said, taking her by the hand and walkingher slwolydown the dock past Melvin and Connie and Lula. She looked questioningly at me, but I just smiled and gave her hand a reassuring little squeeze as we approached the houseboat. I stopped at the end of the dock and pointed to the window. "So, what do you think?"
Her eyes grew wide as she read the writing on the window. Then she took in the houseboat, then the cars, and slowly she turned to look at me. I got down on my knee, and took both of her hands in mine. "Stephanie Plum, will you marry me? Right now?"
I could feel her hands shaking, so I squeezed them just a little tighter. "What? Marry you right now? How? There's no one to marry us, and we don't have our license yet."
"I have the license in my pocket. Patti rushed it for me this afternoon. I'm totally serious, Stephanie. Please, say you'll marry me, right here, right now."
She sucked in her breath and closed her eyes. Time stood still as I waited. Finally, when I had braced myself for the worst, a tear ran down her cheek, and she breathed, "yes."
When the smile broke across my face, the door of the houseboat burst open, and we were suddenly surrounded by a cheering throng. We were lost in the confusion of congratulations and well wishes as people slowly filtered passed us to find seats at the tables. Joe Juniak patted me heartily on the back andtook his place at the end of the dock where Melvin had his camera set up and was snapping pictures.
The ceremony was about to begin when an angry voice rang out from the group. All heads turned towards the table where Dickie and Joyce were sitting with Vinnie and Shorty O. Accusations were flying, and it quickly became apparent that Dickie, as Shorty's lawyer, had billed Shorty for five hours that he claimed he spent on Shorty's business last Friday night. However, it seemed that Joyce had let it slip that Dickie had been with her last Friday night. It didn't take much provocation before guns were drawn. Shorty drew first, then Joyce drew on Shorty. Dickie had ducked under the table, but Vinnie, being the weasel that he is, took off at a run, leaving his wife behind. In his haste, he tripped over Stephanie's purse, which was lying forgotten on the edge of the dock. He took a tumble with the strapof the purse wrapped around his ankle. As the first shot rang out, he half-jumped, half-fell into the water, taking Steph's bag with him.
"Vinnie! My phone!" Stephanie screamed. It was all I could do to hold her back.
All the cops in attendance pulled their weapons and trained them on Shorty and Joyce. Dickey let out a shrill squeal and took off running up the dock.
"He's ruining our wedding!" Stephanie yelled, tearing free of my grip. I knew he wasn't going to get away with it. She ran to the gift table and grabbed the first thing with a handle she came to. Before I could stop her, she had hurled it at Dickie's head, clocking him hard. He went down, and next thing we knew she was on him, remembering too late that she was wearing a wedding dress and had no cuffs. He was screaming that she was a psycho, and she was hitting him in the head with what appeared to be a frying pan wrapped in gold paper with little silver bells on it. As they rolled around, nails sticking up from the wooden planks were snagging her dress, tearing it as they both rolled over the edge of the dock into the water.
Without a second thought, I dived in after them. I was a man possessed. Dickie had hold of Stephanie and he wouldn't let go, so I punched Dickie right in the nose. I had wanted to do that for a very long time. He let go and grabbed his bloodynose, and I pulled Stephanie to shore, kicking and screaming. Truth be told, I probably saved Dickie's life.
Once I had delivered my bride safely back to the dock, I went back in search of Dickie. He was underneath the dock, hanging tight to one of the iron supports. He refused to let go, and I considered punching him again, but when Gazarra dangled a pair of cuffs over the edge of the dock for me, I couldn't resist. I cuffed Dickie to the iron support he was clinging to. When the tide went out, he'd literally be hung out to dry. I warned him that if he made so much as a sound I was going to leave him there till the next high tide.
I swam back to the edge of the dock and Gazarra pulled me up. I reached out and grabbed Vinnie and threw them back in the water on the other side of the dock and didn't let him out until he had found Steph's bag. She snatched it back from him, poured the water out, and dug out her cell enough, it was toast.
"Don't worry," Bernie told her. "I've got you covered, remember?"
This got Stephanie to smile, at last.
"We're still going to do this," I told her, taking her by the hand, and leading her back down the dock. Juniak had been talking to my mother, apparently for some time. He had been nodding in agreement. But now he resumed his place, and even though we were dripping wet, our clothes were torn, and we could all hear Dickie crying beneath our feet, the moment felt right. This marriage was not going to be sugar coated. But it was going to last through any disaster, I thought.
That's when I noticed her earrings. She was wearing the earrings that I bought back for her.
She saw me looking at them, and she smiled radiantly. "When I wear these, I'm always going to remember all the things that you gave back to me that I thought Ihad lost forever."
Grandma Bella and Stephanie's mother came rushing up at the last second.
"Here, Stephanie, dear. Put this in your shoe," Mrs. Plum told her, pressing a shiny new penny in her hand.
"I want you to borrow this," Grandma Bella said, holding out a seashell pendant. "It was given to my grandmother on her wedding day, in Sicily. My grandfather was a fisherman, and he found this shell and had this pin made forher for their wedding day. It was very romantic. I'll tell you the whole story someday," she said, tucking the pin into Stephanie's hand.
Just then, Connie and Lula realized what was going on. They rushed up to Steph with a blue garter and, turning her from both me and the crowd, slipped it on her leg under the dress. "Can't forget that!" Lula said.
"It's tradition," Stephanie said, seeing the look of concern on my face. "I didn't have time to prepare, you know. A bride is supposed to have something borrowed, something blue, something shiny and something new."
I was sick and tired of hearing about wedding traditions, but I could see all the fuss they were making over her was making her happy, so I smiled, took her hand, and we took our places once more. Mooch and Gazarra were standing with me and Lula and Connie were standing with Steph.
Juniak was all smiles as he began. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God and these witnesses to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony, and in so doing, we reflect on the state of all mankind as we await our Savior's return."
"This doesn't sound like the short version," I whispered to Juniak.
"Your mother said you would prefer something religious but non-traditional," he whispered.
"What does that mean?" I asked.I shot a look at my mother. She was smiling in a very self-satisfied way. I grit my teeth, prepared for anything, but not wanting to spoil this moment. So, I looked back into Stephanie's deep, blue eyes and decided to weather the storm.
"Throughout his ministry on Earth, Jesus taught using parables. A parable was a fictitious story used to demonstrate a moral or religious principle. This was a Jewish teaching style. Jesus was a Jew, and he taught the common Jewish people by comparing religious concepts to their familiar cultural customs and traditions. Much of what was commonplace in the days of Jesus is not familiar to us today.
"As Jesus and his disciples sat together in the upper room celebrating the Passover supper in Jerusalem, Jesus surprised the men by ordering them to observe a new, and quite unexpected symbolic tradition; one that only a first-century Jew would recognize as a wedding vow.
"When a Jewish man came of age and was ready to take a wife, his father and the father of the bride would meet together to discuss the "bride price". The young lady would be working in her father's house, so to give her up in marriage would mean a financial loss to the family.
"Once the price was decided, a vow was exchanged. The groom would drink from a cup of wine, and then he would offer it to the young woman. This custom was a public way of making a covenant. The man was saying that he was willing to give up his life for his bride. He pledged to protect her and take care of her needs as if they were his own. The woman accepted, and sealed the engagement by drinking from the same cup. This was symbolic of the two being united as one. From that moment on, the bride was referred to as 'one who has been bought by a price'. The couple was now engaged."
Juniak walked to the punch table where a bottle of wine had been deposited as a gift. He poured the wine into one of the plastic cups and brought it back to us. "Joseph Morelli, are you willing to give up your life for Stephanie? Do you pledge to protect her and care for her needs as your own?" He handed me the cup.
I was stunned. We hadn't even talked about the ceremony. I reached out and took the cup, trying to absorb what he had said.
"I do," Juniak whispered, prompting me.
"I do," I said loudly enough everyone could hear me. I was hoping this really was the short version. Maybe we were going to make it through this.
"Now, drink," he said. I tipped the glass and sipped the wine.
"Stephanie Plum, are you willing to accept Joseph Morelli as your husband? Are you willing to give up your life in exchange for his? And do you promise to care for his needs as your own?"
"I do," she said, and she accepted the cup from me as I handed it to her. She looked me in the eye, and then drank deeply from the cup, having turned it so that her lips were touching the cup in the same place that my lips had been. I was surprised but deeply moved by this unexpected bit of ceremony.
Juniak continued, "Now, dear friends, this Old Testament couple was now betrothed, and for all purposes considered to be married, but this was only the beginning of the wedding process. They each returned home to their own families. They would not live together for at least a year. The groom would return to his father's house, often in a neighboring village. He would then begin to build a suitable house for his bride. Usually, this house was built connected to his father's house or to the complex of houses that belonged his father's family. Only when the couple's new house was finished could the groom return to claim his bride. However, the work would only be considered finished when the young man's father approved it. No one, not even the groom, knew when he would return for his young bride."
Juniak walked past us and approached Frank. "Mr. Plum, I understand that you are willing to serve in the stead of Rocco Morelli as Joseph's father, is that right?"
Frank was obviously so unprepared for all this as I was. He considered for a second before nodding.
"Have you inspected the home that Joseph has provided for Stephanie?"
"Yes," he answered, standing up before all the people.
"And do you find it to be acceptable?"
"Yes, I do," he said, nodding to me his satisfaction with the little houseboat.
"Thank you," Juniak said, patting Frank on the back as Frank sat back down. Juniak returned to his place and continued.
"While the groom was away building their home, the bride waited with anxious excitement. She was busy learning all she would need to know to run her own household, gathering things she would need, and making plans. She and her bridesmaids were to be ready for the groom's return at any time. He would come without warning, you see, and she wanted to look beautiful and to be dressed appropriately for their long awaited wedding day. She needed to be packed and ready to leave for her new homethe moment the feasting was over."
At these words, Stephanie's eyes fell, and she looked guilty about not being prepared to be a good housewife. But I squeezed her hand and she looked up at me as I smiled back down at her. I didn't need a cook or a maid. I just needed Stephanie. She knew me. She saw me for what I really was, and she still loved me. And I knew that I could live the rest of my life and still be a step behind her, struggling to catch up. I would never get tired of chasing her. She seemed to be reading my thoughts as she squeezed my hand back.
Juniak's polished speaking-voicedroned on. "Finally, when the groom's father declared the new house was ready, the groom and his wedding party would enter the city blowing a ram's horn. When the bride heard the trumpet sound, she knew her wedding day had finally arrived! It was a time for immediate celebration and joy. She was finally, FINALLY, going to her a new home, built for her by the man who sacrificed so much to have her in his life and who loved her dearly.
"Get up!" he commanded the audience. "Get up and shout! Clap your hands and stomp your feet, people! Let's make some noise! The groom is finally able to claim his bride!"
Someone had an air-horn, and everyone was yelling all kinds of stuff at us like, "It's about time!" and "That was a long walk down the aisle, man,". I heard Stephanie's nieces chanting "Stephanie and Joe, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" I thought this was really embarrassing, but the sound of all our loved ones cheering us was also a thrill. It was so unexpected. Stephanie was blushing to the roots of her hair, and I had to laugh. People a mile away could probably hear the noise.
After a minute or two, Juniak began speaking again, regaining control. "The community then celebrated with them seven days, a full week, feasting and drinking wine!"
"We don't have that much food! We'll have to call Pino's!" someone yelled. "Where's the beer?" someone else asked. It died down quickly, though, as people were shushing the offenders.
"When Jesus drank from the cup at the first communion meal, the disciples no doubt understood the significance of drinking from the same cup. In Luke 22:20, Jesus said, 'This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.' Essentially, Jesus was saying that he was the bridegroom, willing to die for his bride. As they broke the bread and ate it together, he explained that his broken body and spilled blood would be the 'bride price' required for the marriage to take place. Only those who accept this gift are considered to be brides of Christ, that is, to be claimed by him and protected by him.
"Now, if you think I'm making this up, consider this: the disciples loved Jesus, and they didn't want to accept what Jesus was telling them was about to happen, that he was about to die for them. In John chapter 13, Jesus comforted them by saying, 'Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust in me. There are many rooms in my Father's house; I would not tell you this if it were not true. I am going there to prepare a place for you. After I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back to take you to be with me so that you may be where I am.'
"Within hours of this covenant, Jesus fulfilled his word. He suffered scourging and crucifixion on the cross. He died of his own free will, to pay the 'bride price'. Once that price was paid, he rose from the dead, and continued to teach his disciples for many days before he returned to his Father's house in Heaven. And that is where he is right now. Jesus is quite literally building us a new place to live in his father's house in Heaven. Even Jesus doesn't know when God the Father will say it's enough. But when that day comes, he will return to claim his Bride, and we need to be ready! We'll hear him coming, because there will be trumpets and shouts of joy on that day!
"But today, we have this promise symbolized by the marriage of Joseph and Stephanie. They have longed for eachother, longed for this day! What a joy it is that they will be together for the rest of their lives, never having to part again."
Juniak turned to me. "Joseph, do you bring a ring as a token of your love?"
"Yes," I said, turning to Mooch. He slipped Stephanie's ring into my hand, and I handed it to Juniak. He held it up for everyone to see. Then handed it back to me as I slipped it slowly onto Stephanie's finger. A tear splashed on our fingers, surprising me. Stephanie was silently crying. She didn't know I had a ring for her to give to me. When I bought her rings, I bought a complete set. I reached my hand out and Mooch slipped my ring into my hand, and I gently laid it in her palm. She closed her hand around it and held it to her heart as she turned her big, blue eyes to mine. I was her hero yet again, and my heart filled pride.
"Stephanie, do you bring a ring as a token of your love?"
"Yes," she whispered, handing the ring to Juniak. Again, he held it up for everyone to see. Then he passed it back to Stephanie, and with trembling fingers she placed it on my finger.
"Beloved, let Jesus' words in John 15:12 act as an anchor for you as you begin your newlife together; 'This is my commandment: love one another as I have loved you.'
"And now, having witnessed the exchanging of vows, it is my great honor to pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride!"
And just like that, it was over. I was stunned for a moment. I was a married man. I was married to Stephanie Plum. I had been so busy rushing around getting things done, going without sleep for yet another night,and now,as quickly as the ceremony started, it was over. I was out of plans. Everything was complete. I was complete.
I pulled Stephanie in to my arms and kissed her as cheers and shouts echoed on the water.
"May I introduce to you Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Morelli!"
As we were about to be mobbed again, I held up my hands for silence. "While we have your attention, I have an announcement to make." Everyone sat back down and a low murmur broke out. Probably everyone thought Stephanie was pregnant. I smiled at that. "Effective this morning, I have resigned from the Trenton Police Department."
Stephanie gasped and turned to stare at me. "You gave up being a cop? Why, Joe? Not for me?"
I turned to her, still holding her hand. "I hoped that you would go into business with me."
She turned back to the houseboat and stared at the glass that read Morelli & Morelli. "You and me?"
"Who did you think I was going into business with? Mooch?" I said, laughing.
"Well, yeah," she said with a shrug. "It says Morelli & Morelli, not Morelli & Plum."
"I was hoping you wouldwant to take my name. I thought Stephanie Morelli had a nice ring to it," I said, pulling her close again. "Please," I whispered in her ear. "Be my partner in the agency. I'll let you work from home," I said temptingly.
Stephanie laughed. "Yes," she said. "I'd love to be your business partner."
"I have another announcement," I said proudly. "Stephanie Morelli has also resigned her position as Bond Enforcement Agent and has agreed to be my new business partner." Cheers erupted yet again.
At this news, Vinnie jumped up out of his seat in protest. "You ungrateful little tramp!" he yelled. "After all I've done for you! You can't do this! I just bought a bigger house because of you!"
Before Stephanie could respond, Connie and Lula were descending on him like a couple of harpies.
"What about me? You sayin' I ain't got no skills?" Lula demanded.
"What you've done for her?" Connie was screeching. "You nearly get her killed once a week, you greedly little ferret!"
"You're useless as a file clerk and as a bounty hunter," Vinnie told Lula. "Thank God I've still got my ace in the hole," he said, jabbing a thumb in Ranger's direction.
That got a deep, throaty laugh out of Ranger. "You know, Vincent…I haven't needed the income from hunting down your skips in a long, long time. I was only staying on because I enjoy the hunt and because I was helpingStephanie. But she doesn't need me anymore. So, it looks like you're going to have to come out of retirement and hunt those bad guys down yourself if you're going to keep bonding out that kind of scum."
"What? What?" Vinnie shouted, hopping around like a wounded bird. "You can't quit!"
"I just did," Ranger said firmly.
"Well, fine!" Vinnie screamed. "I still have…who? Joyce? Crap! All I have is Joyce? No, no, no! I'm a dead man."
"Joyce? No way. I'm not dealing with Joyce as your primo bounty hunter," Connie said. "I quit!"
"You can't quit! I own you!" Vinnie squealed.
"Oh yeah?" Lula roared. "Well, I quit too! Me and Connie are going to go work for Melvin."
"Yeah!" Connie said, and they turned on their heels and marched back to Melvin, who still had the camera rolling. If he didn't have a business of his own before, he certainly would after this. Everyone in the Burg was going to wantto buy acopy.
"How dare you insult me like this!" Joyce bellowed at Vinnie. She hauled back and punched Vinnie so hard he fell back and somersaulted into the water again. Joyce took off in a huff, stepping over Vinnie's wife who had passed out when she heard that Vinnie was going to be broke. Her father, Harry the Hammer, was sure to be notified the first time Vinnie missed a mortgage payment.
Tank and Big Dog pulled Vinnie back up onto the dock and escorted him and his wife back to their vehicle.
Melvin got a great picture of our hands on the cake knife, but the other pictures of the customary first bite of cake and champagne are not in Steph's scrapbook because she thinks she looked like a French poodle and I looked like a drowned rat.
Actually, he got a beautiful shot when I handed the bouquet to Steph. She was beautiful. That's the picture I keep in my head, my heart, and in my wallet.
To be continued...
