Chapter 53
Tim had hoped that this wouldn't happen, but there Sam was, Naomi standing beside him. They both looked more than a little shocked to see him.
"Tim..." Naomi said.
Everyone else was forgotten. Tim found he couldn't look them in the eye. He knew that they would be disapproving of what he'd done, and he couldn't even say that it had been worth it because he didn't know if it had succeeded.
All in all, he wasn't happy to see his parents.
But at the same time, he couldn't just sit there or pretend he hadn't seen them. That would make a bad situation even worse.
He looked up and saw Tony staring at him. He tried to smile, but he couldn't. Instead, he got up and walked over to his parents.
There was no bravado. There was no confidence. At this point, all Tim felt he had left was uncertainty and disappointment.
"I'm sorry," he said, softly, dropping his eyes to the floor again. "I don't even know if anything I did made a difference. I might have failed completely. You might still go to prison."
That feeling of failure that had been hovering over him ever since he'd started this attempt started to crush him, and Tim didn't think he could say anything else without breaking down and looking like an idiot.
"I'm sorry," he whispered.
Then, a rough, calloused hand caught his arm and pulled him down. Before he knew it, he was being hugged tightly. For a few seconds, there was only silence. Then, he heard his father's voice in his ear.
"No, Tim. I know what you're feeling right now, and you need to not look at it that way. If you did what you could, you didn't fail."
"Yes, I did. If you aren't free, I failed."
"No. If I still end up in prison, all that means is that the bad guys stacked the deck too much and no one could win. It doesn't mean you failed. And the only thing you have to apologize for is that the bathroom still isn't finished."
Tim laughed a little, but then, that led to the one thing he had been trying so hard not to show since this started.
He started to cry.
"I can't lose you, Dad. I can't. I can't watch you fade away again."
He felt another set of arms around him, this time from behind.
"It's all right, Tim. It's going to be all right. It's not over yet," Naomi said.
"It could be," Tim said.
"It's not. Not yet. Director Vance is talking to Secretary Drake, right now."
"What?" Tim pulled back and looked at Sam and then back over his shoulder at Naomi. "Why?"
"He just said that he had a few things to share with him. He didn't say anything more."
Tim stood up and was instantly pulled into another hug.
"Tim, you didn't have to do this," Naomi said, so only he could hear. "We didn't want this for you."
"I know, but I couldn't have lived with myself if I didn't," he said, just as softly.
Naomi hugged him more tightly.
"I know. As soon as you left, I knew why you did, but you didn't need to."
"Yes, I did. For myself, even if I didn't need to for Dad."
Naomi pulled back and looked him in the eye.
"Never feel ashamed to see us, Tim. There is nothing you need to worry that we'll reject you for."
Tim hugged Naomi back. Then, the three of them headed to where everyone else was pretending that they hadn't been watching. For the first time, Tim thought about Charlie being there and how that might go, but when he neared the sitting area, he realized that Charlie was not there. His eyes widened slightly and he looked at Gibbs with a silent question. Gibbs just nodded, and Tim took that to mean he didn't need to worry.
Actually, it was a relief to be away from him for a while. He still couldn't decide what he felt about Charlie, now that he knew so much about him and about what had happened.
Quickly, he wiped the residual tears from his eyes, trying to get back some of his cloak of supposed strength that he'd momentarily lost. It wouldn't do to fall apart right now. There was no reason to. It wasn't over yet. Not yet.
But what if it is and you just don't know?
The treacherous voice in his head got the lead balloon back in his stomach and started it swelling until he started to feel the same tension.
No one spoke. What was there to say that hadn't already been said? How could there be any light conversation when the outcome of what happened could have such devastating consequences?
Finally, after about half an hour of tense silence, the intern came back.
"Agent McGee, Dr. McGee, Captain Coleman, could you come with me, please?"
Sam turned his chair around.
"My wife, too?"
"They didn't say her."
"Did they say she couldn't come?" Sam asked.
"Uh...no."
"Then, she's coming. This affects her as much as it does the rest of us."
Tim couldn't remember the last time he'd heard his father speak like that. It wasn't that it was rude. There was something...commanding in it. Even when he'd been lectured or stern, Tim hadn't felt like his father was issuing orders. If asked to explain just what was different, he couldn't have pointed to any one thing that explained it, but it was there.
"Yes, sir," the intern said, clearly feeling the same thing.
He turned and walked them back to the same conference room Tim had been in before. Only this time, Vance was there, along with the other two people Tim still didn't know.
"Welcome back, Agent McGee, Captain Coleman," Secretary Drake said. "You must be Dr. McGee, and this is your wife?"
"Yes, Mr. Secretary," Sam said. "Naomi McGee."
"Mr. Beechman, please make a space at the table for Dr. McGee and then, you're free to go."
"Yes, sir," the intern said.
He quickly shifted a chair away from the table, leaving ample space for Sam. Then, he left the room, again looking relieved, if Tim was any judge.
"Now, we have some important things to discuss."
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
Tony felt really uncomfortable, sitting around waiting for something to happen. He wasn't really very patient about stuff like this. He could be patient if necessary, but he didn't like it.
"How long will this take, do you think?" he asked the group, at large.
"Depends," Cresswell said. "If Secretary Drake has already made a decision, it may not take long at all. If he's still trying to find a way to avoid a political nightmare, it may take longer."
"Really, though, will having Sam go down for it be much less of a nightmare?" Tony asked. "I mean, I realize that he's a nobody to them, but he's still a U.S. citizen committing these crimes."
"Yes, but he's not one of the most powerful people in the country," Chegwidden said. "It's a lot harder to convince people to forget about the Secretary of Defense being an international criminal than it is a random citizen, even if he is in a wheelchair."
"What about Tim?"
"I don't know," Cresswell said. "From what I know, he committed a crime, but his reasons for it are understandable."
"He doesn't plan on fighting punishment, you know," Chegwidden said.
"Yeah, I know, but he has to! He can't go to prison. He... McGee wouldn't make it in prison. He's not a prison sort of guy," Tony said.
"Most people aren't."
Tony couldn't help but laugh a little.
"I know. It's just... I know what he did was wrong, but what started all this is a lot more wrong, and Tim would never have done it if they hadn't started it. They've been trying to kill him!"
"That doesn't necessarily matter, Agent DiNozzo," Charlie said, coming out from his hiding place.
"Where did you disappear to?"
"I decided that there was no reason for Sam and Naomi to have the additional anger seeing me would give them. They have enough stress in their life, right now." He shrugged. "I added to their stress thirty years ago. I don't have to do that, now."
"And you didn't want to see them, either."
"Sure. Would you?" Charlie asked.
"Point."
"Anyway, sometimes, it just doesn't matter, even when it should. Politics tends to set aside what's right, if it's convenient. We just have to hope that this time, it's not convenient."
Charlie turned away from them and walked to the window.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
"Dr. McGee, do you have anything to add?"
"You have my account from thirty years ago," Sam said, sternly. "I see no reason to change that, now. It was true the first time."
Secretary Drake nodded.
"Based on the information from Agent McGee, and Mr. Leadore's retraction..."
"What?" Sam asked, interrupting him. "Charlie?"
He looked at Tim, and the way Tim looked away told him everything.
"You found him. Why?"
"As Agent McGee pointed out to me, the only evidence supporting the charges against you was the account of your second-in-command. He has willingly retracted his initial report."
Sam felt Naomi's tight grip on his arm. She wasn't showing anything outwardly, but he knew she was as shocked by this as he was. He had assumed that, if Charlie came out of the woodwork, it would be to do the same thing he'd done thirty years ago. Another stab in the back.
"That being the case, I cannot, in good conscience, pursue charges against you. I will need to know things that are probably missing from your report as my investigation continues, but you will not be charged."
It was said so calmly and so abruptly that it didn't even register, at first.
"Just like that?" Naomi asked.
Secretary Drake actually smiled very slightly.
"Hasn't it been long enough? Would you rather I drag it out for even longer?"
"No, but after all this time, all these people trying to force us to given in, the threats...I have to admit that I expected that level of stress to continue."
"All the more reason to end it as soon as possible. Dr. McGee, you and your wife are free to go, although you may want to be cautious for a little longer while I continue my investigation."
Sam started to move, but then, he realized who had not been included in that dismissal. He stopped.
"What about my son?"
"I committed a crime, Dad," Tim said, softly. "That doesn't go away just because you're innocent."
Sam looked from Tim, who wouldn't meet his gaze, to Secretary Drake.
"What about my son?" he asked again.
"As he said, he committed a crime. You didn't."
"Yes, I did. My crime was disobeying orders which were illegal and immoral. I was told, going into that mission, that I might have to make a choice between doing the right thing and obeying orders."
"By whom?"
"Admiral Jackson. He came to me in private and told me that, and he said that he would try to protect me as much as possible if I did choose to do the right thing. That's why they didn't go after me thirty years ago. I'm sure they hoped that it was just something that had gone away."
"Under the circumstances, your choice to disobey orders has little impact on my decisions. That is something your superiors would have to decide at the time. The case before me was who had destroyed a village in Nicaragua. You didn't do that," Secretary Drake said. "However, your son did hack the DoD. He has confessed."
"He did it because of your attitude, right now."
"Excuse me?"
"Dad, don't," Tim said.
Sam looked at Tim for a split second but then returned his focus to Secretary Drake. He'd never been so furious in his entire life. Even when Charlie had betrayed him, it had been less about anger and more about pain. In this case, he was genuinely furious that Secretary Drake would sit there and hand down edicts so callously.
"While I'm assuming that you would not choose to intentionally convict an innocent man, you seem more than willing to make an example of my son."
"He committed a crime."
"Yes, he did. To save my life from someone with more power than conscience. I can see it in your eyes. You're thinking that you can punish Tim and it will somehow make up for the situation you might end up in. You don't want to take on the Secretary of Defense. You want to sit in your cozy little spot and not have to worry about it. I don't blame you, but you need to man up and face the fact that this is not a simple situation. This is not a situation where you can be content with staying safe. You have to engage. My son has almost always seen the world in terms of black and white. Gray is a difficult range because he doesn't like being there. The only thing that could push him to it would be absolute desperation. In doing so, he not only saved me, but he completed your investigation for you. He did the kinds of thing you should have been doing. Because it mattered to him. It doesn't matter to you, not really. You're trying to keep this as quiet as possible. Well, let me tell you that, if you try to make my son pay the price that you don't want to put on Secretary Stidden, it will not remain quiet."
"Is that a threat?"
"No. I don't make threats," Sam said, looking nowhere but at Secretary Drake. "I never make threats. I say what I mean and I don't back down. I knew that I might destroy my Navy career when I chose to disobey orders. I did not excuse myself when I made that choice. I knew it was the right choice, but I never tried to pretend that I wasn't disobeying. My only regret from that is that it didn't work. I didn't save anyone. That still haunts me to this day. I have lost a lot of people because of this mission, and I won't let you take one more away from me. I will not allow my son to be the final victim."
Secretary Drake showed himself to be a master. He didn't wince or show any discomfort. He just looked at Sam calmly.
"Then, what do you suggest?"
"I suggest that you're making more problems for yourself than you need to."
"In what way?"
"In that no one knows about my side of things. No one knows about the intimidation. No one knows that Secretary Stidden was the likely culprit in those threats. If you bring Tim to trial, what you're doing is shining a light on something that no one has to know about. If you have Tim on trial, you will have people finding out about the abuse of power that has been committed. The public doesn't care about nameless employees who do all the work. They care about the results. If you say that this information was found in the DoD archives, no one will ask which person found it. They'll simply ask what it means. I'm assuming that the people pushing won't care about that, either. If you're truly willing to accept my innocence, then, you have to offer up the guilty party. Why not reduce the problems down to one, even if it will be the hardest one to deal with?"
"And you think that's the best option?"
"Yes. Not just because my son's life is at stake, but because even though I hate the political game, I know it exists and I understand how it works. I've never been a politician. I was a Navy man, raised that way, but the people who make the decisions are usually politicans and my father taught me to know how politics work. You have to deal with Secretary Stidden. You don't have to deal with my son."
There was a long silence, and Sam hoped he had read Secretary Drake correctly. He didn't think that he was corrupt, simply practical, and if the case could be made that it was be more practical to look the other way, he would do it.
Finally, he leaned forward and actually smiled.
"Commander McGee, I haven't had such a thorough dressing down since I served. I appreciate your perspective, and I understand your need to say it. I can't give you a definitive answer right now. If you and your son are willing to wait, I'll take that under advisement. For now, you may go."
Sam could see that there was nothing more he could say, now. He rolled back from the table while Tim and Naomi stood up.
They walked out of the room and were met by the intern once more. He led them down the hall.
As they headed back to the waiting area, Sam looked up at Tim who was walking stiffly beside him.
"I meant what I said, Tim. You're not going to prison."
"I should. I broke the law, Dad."
"No, you shouldn't."
"There shouldn't be exceptions like that."
Sam laughed.
"Yes, there should, and there always are. You know it. Tim, you're not going to prove anything by insisting that they punish you for what you did."
Tim still didn't look at him. Sam wasn't quite sure what this was about, but he could see that Tim wasn't going to relax until this was actually over.
"You talked to Charlie?" Sam asked.
"Yes."
"How did you even know to look at him?"
"Because they tried hide him. If he was just another person, his records would be easy to find."
"That figures." Sam hesitated and looked at Naomi. Then, he looked back at Tim. "How was he?"
"Seemed fine."
"You can talk about him, Tim. It's been a long time. Did you like him?"
"I don't know. He's alone. He told me about his family when I asked him, and... I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. His parents didn't care about him. His mom didn't even recognize him when he went to his dad's funeral. He said that you were the only person who ever tried to protect him, Mom. He never thought you'd know about what he did, but he did think he'd be able to be the one to tell you."
"That doesn't make it any better," Naomi said, softly.
"Maybe marginally," Sam said. "Not much. But he decided to tell the truth."
"Yeah."
"Why?"
Tim shrugged.
"That's not an answer, and there must be one since you don't want to say it."
"After someone tried to kill us, he decided that they hadn't given him any other choice."
Naomi stopped dead in her tracks and grabbed Tim by the arm.
"Someone tried to kill you?"
"They missed. It's fine, Mom."
"No, it's not. That is not fine."
Tim finally turned to face her.
"Yes, it is. Because they didn't succeed. As long as the one calling the shots gets taken down, it won't matter."
Then, he kept walking. When they got back to the waiting area, Tim and Naomi sat down.
"Well?" Tony asked.
"He's not going to pursue charges against my dad," Tim said.
"That's great. So can we go?"
"He's still considering charges against Tim," Sam said. "I'm not leaving until I know the results, but you all have been sitting here a long time. You don't have to wait."
"Are you kidding? There's no way I'm leaving until I know what's going to happen," Tony said.
"I do have to get going," Cresswell said, standing up. "But I'm glad to hear that at least part of this is going right. Keep up the fight. Make it inconvenient for them to do the wrong thing and they'll do the right thing. Good luck."
"Thanks for your support," Sam said, holding out his hand. "Even though I didn't realize it was there, it's appreciated."
"Anytime. Captain Coleman, you can choose to see this through..."
"I'll be in tomorrow, sir."
"That's fine."
Cresswell left them. After about thirty minutes, Vance came out. They all looked up, almost at the same time.
"Well?" Gibbs asked.
"No decision yet. As much as I'd like to stay here, I have a job to do. I've done as much as I can, Agent McGee. It's just a matter of what Secretary Drake chooses to do."
"Yes, sir," Tim said softly.
Vance left, and they sat for another half an hour. Suddenly, there was a flurry of activity down the hall. A man came striding toward them, accompanied by about five others. He didn't look happy. As they neared the group in the waiting area, Sam suddenly recognized one of the men with him. It was the first one who had tried to intimidate him. He paused just for a moment and then gestured to the man in charge. He looked for a second and then looked back at Sam.
Sam sat up in his chair and met the man's gaze directly. This must be Secretary Stidden himself. While he wanted to give this man a lecture he'd never forget, Sam just sat there, proud to know that Stidden's attempt to rid himself of the blame had failed. The man with him smiled slightly and kept moving. Interesting how the people involved were clearly not devoted to the situation. They were just doing a job, it seemed.
"Secretary Stidden," Faith said, softly, when the group had vanished around a corner.
Tony muttered a few choice words but said nothing more. Tim's uncertain status kept them from talking about anything else.
Finally, two hours after the last meeting, the unfortunate intern was back again.
"Agent McGee only, this time. And Secretary Drake did specify that it was just him."
"Okay," Tim said, and stood up quickly. He glanced at Sam but didn't stop. He just walked away.
"What's going on, do you think?" Tony asked.
"He's made his decision," Chegwidden said, "but he's probably not going to publicize it, no matter what it is, and so he's going to talk to Agent McGee alone."
"What about Stidden?" Tony asked. "We didn't see him come back."
"I doubt he'll be there."
"How long do you think it will take?"
"I don't know. We'll just have to wait and see."
