A/N: This really wasn't supposed to be the fiftieth update of this fic (and let's all take a moment to be shocked and awed The Green Files has made it this far). I've been trying to write out a chapter that's a little different than anything else I've tried but it's been two months and the damn thing's still not ready. That particular addition will come, obviously in its own time, but this one has a little bit of humor and fluff.
I'd also like to thank all of the reviewers, especially those who've been reading this fic for a long time. It's been about four years, and I can't tell you how much I appreciate the support and encouragement. It's been a fun ride, guys, and there's still another fifty prompts to get through. I'm going to make the best of those!
Disclaimer: As repetitive as these have become, I think it's been well established that I do not own TT.
066. Rain
Beast Boy didn't care what the rest of the world thought—Robin wasn't so smart. Actually, in the changeling's opinion, the Boy Wonder was an idiot.
He would have to be, to ask him to share a tent with Raven.
"What?" Raven demanded icily after Robin informed them of the sleeping arrangements.
Their leader held up his hands in a placating gesture. "It's only for one night," Robin assured them. "The next campsite actually has a cabin so we'll all have our own bunks, then."
Beast Boy hardly felt appeased, and from her venomous glare, he doubted Raven was, either.
"Why can't I just share a tent with Cy?" Beast Boy asked.
"Because I had to bring some of my equipment out here, and I need all the room I can get," Cyborg interjected from where he was setting up his large tent. He had already put up another pair of smaller tents, which Beast Boy figured would be the ones they would use.
"Then I can share one with Starfire, while Robin and Beast Boy take the other," Raven said. She eyed the other tents. "And are you certain those are meant for two people?"
"Yes, those are tents for two, and…uh…" Robin paused to cast a quick glance at the Tamaranian, who was happily bringing an armful of large logs back into the campsite. "Star is sleeping in my tent."
There was a brief silence after that. Beast Boy, though his jaw dropped slightly, had to give Robin some credit—the Boy Wonder had actually managed to say that without blushing. Cyborg disguised his snicker as a particularly hacking cough. Raven merely raised an eyebrow.
Still, Robin did sound a little beseeching as he continued. "Listen, I know you two haven't been getting along well lately but think of this as—"
"Hey, we get along!" Beast Boy interrupted indignantly. He turned to his dark teammate for support. "Right, Raven?"
The Azarathian gave him a stare that—in Beast Boy's opinion, at least—was just a little too blank.
The changeling swallowed a frustrated groan but reminded himself that her attitude wasn't a big deal. It wasn't as if he and Raven disliked each other. Sure, things had been a little strained between them lately, and it was taking less and less to set each other off but Beast Boy figured it had to do with of the influx of criminal activity in the last few months. The constant stream of attacks had put the entire team on edge, so it was hardly any wonder that Beast Boy and Raven had been arguing a little more frequently than usual.
Of course, Starfire and Cyborg sometimes hinted that there might be other reasons for the tension—they had both spent the last month looking between Raven and him with these looks of dawning comprehension, obviously suggesting they knew something he didn't, and the changeling had never before felt so out-of-the-loop—but Beast Boy honestly couldn't imagine anything else being wrong. They were stressed, that was all, and stressed people had a tendency to get angry and yell a lot of things they didn't actually mean.
"Besides, if there was something else going on, Raven'd let me know," Beast Boy had informed them after being cornered one evening. He'd sent a desperate glance toward Robin, but the Boy Wonder had vacated the kitchen quickly enough to make the changeling suspicious. Maybe Cyborg and Starfire weren't the only ones who thought something was up with him and Raven.
"But perhaps Raven is hoping that you might notice something?" Starfire replied.
Cyborg nodded. "Yeah, BB. Maybe she wants you to pay attention to a few things?"
They were trying to lead him somewhere with all this, he understood that. He just hadn't known where that was. "Notice things?" He'd asked, trying to think of some specific detail Raven would want him to pay attention to. "Uh, did I forget to put the seat up again?"
"Ah…no, friend."
"Think a little more personal, man."
So, he did. He knew hadn't missed her birthday—he knew that date by heart, thanks to the time he'd spent hacking into her file before her sixteenth birthday—and it wasn't like she celebrated any strange Azarathian holidays the way Starfire did. Beyond that, Raven was normally frank with him. If she wanted him to know something, she simply told him, mostly because she knew how bad he was at picking up subtitles. Hell, he'd even pronounced the 'b' in subtle until Robin had taken pity on him and explained that it was silent (which had also explained why Cyborg laughed and Raven smirked whenever he said the word).
His prompters saw that he was struggling. "Maybe it has something to do with the way you've both been acting lately?"
"You mean the way she's been running hot and cold on me?"
It was true. For months now, the Azarathian had been at turns indifferent and open toward them, and he couldn't quite figure out why. There were days when she went out of her way to spend time with him, even going so far as to accompany him into the city on a comic book run or letting him teach her how to make tofu curry. Sometimes, she even invited him places, and even if her book stores and coffee houses weren't really his thing, he hadn't minded going with her because he really liked hanging out with her. Raven was always as sarcastic as ever, but she never even tried to hide the fact that she was enjoying being with him. Instead, she seemed almost…affectionate toward him, he supposed, which he'd liked. A lot.
Other times, though, she seemed to be resisting the urge to either send him to another dimension—like when that Flame Bird chick had flirted him, and Raven had looked pissed and grumbled something about him having an idiotic propensity for blondes, even after he tried to explain he barely even knew her and had only been trying to make conversation—or she ignored his existence entirely. She never really explained why she would get so infuriated with him and in fact, would even more irritated when he'd ask.
"Something like that," Cyborg confirmed.
"How does that make you feel?" Starfire asked.
"Confused," Beast Boy had answered promptly. He'd also thought about asking if Raven's weird emotional rollercoaster had anything to do with a certain time of the month, but then he remembered the time Cyborg had calculated that particular week and marked it on the calendar—he had, in complete seriousness, written out 'attack of the red dragon' in similarly colored ink and block letters—as a warning to the other male occupants of the Tower. Of course, it hadn't been long before Starfire and Raven to discover and decipher the notice, and the Tamaranian and the Azarathian had been livid. It was actually the first time he'd ever seen Raven throw someone out a window who wasn't him.
He decided that wasn't a conversation topic to bring up again.
"Look, you guys're trying to tell me something, right?" They nodded encouragingly. "Why don't you just tell me?"
He had thought he was being practical. And then he'd noticed Cyborg and Starfire exchanging looks, and this time, there was no emerging realization in their expressions. They'd just seemed frustrated and wouldn't him why.
But still, the changeling getting back to the present and trying to reassure himself. He saw no reason for his leader to say that he and Raven weren't getting along anymore. Things were a little tense sometimes, but he knew none of that changed the fact that he and Raven cared about each other. They were friends. In fact, on most days, Beast Boy wouldn't hesitate to call them close friends.
However, on most days, they weren't tired and sweaty from hiking a ten mile trail carrying large packs because a backpacking trip in the middle of the National Redwood Forest was the Boy Wonder's idea of a mini-vacation (though, apparently, the fact that everyone except Starfire considered this another form of training completely escaped him). On most days, they were not forced to live off of granola bars, water, and packed sandwiches, and to go without showers.
And most importantly, on most days, they weren't being asked to share exceptionally small sleeping spaces.
"It's just for one night?" Raven asked suddenly, removing Beast Boy from his thoughts.
"Only one," Robin replied, sounding just a tad too relieved for the changeling's taste. "And we'll be getting up early tomorrow morning."
The Azarathian seemed to consider this for a moment longer before speaking again. "Fine," she said, not bothering to even look at Beast Boy. "This is…extremely uncomfortable, but I can manage for one night. He can stay on his side, and I'll stay on mine."
Without another word to either boy, she went to help Starfire start a fire. Beast Boy watched after her. "Dudes, what is up with her?" he demanded.
The response was less than helpful. Cyborg gave an amused snort. Robin looked faintly apologetic. Even Starfire, looking at him over her shoulder, sent him a tiny, pitying shake of her head. Raven continued to ignore him.
Beast Boy went to bed that night feeling slightly doomed.
The changeling didn't know how long he'd been asleep. The only thing he did know was that his head was very suddenly wet.
"Aw, crap!" he hissed, quickly sitting up and trying to shake the water from his hair without waking Raven. He could feel some tiny rivulets running down the back of his neck and wetting the shoulders of his shirt, and he gingerly touched the top the tent. It felt cool and slightly damp, letting the changeling know that it had probably rained a little while ago, but no water was seeping through.
The floor, however, was a different story. Once his eyes adjusted, Beast Boy saw that a rather large puddle had formed on his side of the tent, soaking his pillow and part of his sleeping bag.
"Rae?" he whispered. She didn't move. He cleared his throat before trying again. "Hey, Raven?"
She stirred at little and the slightest of annoyed expressions came to her face but her eyes stayed shut. Beast Boy sighed. He'd always imagined her as a light sleeper.
"Rae, wake up!" Beast Boy called as loudly as he could without his voice carrying to his other teammates.
"I am awake, Beast Boy," Raven snapped, finally opening her eyes. "What is it?"
That was a good question, and the changeling wondered exactly why he'd woken her. It wasn't like she could do anything about the water, and there wasn't enough room for her to give him any more space. "Um, I think it must have rained 'cause I'm in a puddle over here," he explained sheepishly, hoping she wouldn't get angry.,
The dark girl gave him an unreadable look before rolling over to face away from him. Or, at least, she tried to. The tight sleeping bags restricted movement. "So, move closer to me."
It was a good thing she'd turned away. The changeling doubted she would have appreciated him gaping at her as if she had just grown a second head, a tail, and sparkly pink wings. Actually, that might have been less of a surprise. "Huh?"
"You have superb hearing, Beast Boy," Raven said, and even though her sleeping bag was around her, he could see how rigid she was. "I don't need to repeat myself."
Maybe she did, because he was replaying what she'd said in his head and it still didn't make sense. Earlier she had barely been able to stand the idea of sharing a tent with him—and now she was willing to share her warmth? The girl was easily the biggest enigma he'd ever met, and he had long ago accepted her idiosyncrasies, but this was the first time she had invited him into her personal space. Sure, she'd hugged him that one time, but she hadn't been receptive of any of his attempts since.
"Um, you know what? I'm just going to go hang out by the fire and wait for my stuff to dry." He gave her a few seconds to answer but wasn't too surprised that she didn't.
Beast Boy sat heavily on a damp log and stared into the pile of wet ashes that had earlier been a cheerful blaze. He should have known the rain would put out the fire, too. Someone had left one of their camping lamps out, and when Beast Boy leaned over to switch it on, it surprisingly still worked, though barely. It wasn't providing much light, and it definitely wasn't doing much to dry him off. He wished he'd thought to sleep in something warmer than just a t-shirt and pajama bottoms, but it was summer, and Robin had said they wouldn't have to worry too much about getting cold. Of course, Robin had also figured on spending the night curled up with Star, which was what had put Beast Boy into this awkward position with Raven in the first place…
The changeling's thoughts were interrupted a few moments later by a zipping noise and then Raven crawled out of the tent. Beast Boy watched her, noting that she was also in a simple shirt and pajama bottoms but was carrying a light blanket with her as well. She draped it around her like her cloak and trudged to sit next to him on the log.
He continued to look at her. Wrapped up like she was with her hair mussed from sleep and her muddy boots poking out from underneath the blanket's edge—the image made him give a tiny smile. It was weird but even with the scowl on her face, Beast Boy couldn't help but think that Raven looked kind of cute.
It didn't take her long to notice he was watching her, however, and when she turned her gaze to him, she didn't look happy about it. "What?" she demanded.
Yeesh, grumpy much? Beast Boy thought but wisely kept that comment to himself. "Nothing," he answered neutrally. "Just wondering why you followed me."
"There's water on my side, too," she explained moodily.
"Oh." He didn't remember any being there but wasn't about to question her.
An awkward silence stretched between them. Raven looked like she hardly minded—she probably didn't, quiet was kind of her thing—but it weighed heavily on Beast Boy. He only managed a few minutes before cracking.
"At least you can really see the stars out here," Beast Boy commented, tilting his head back. He cast a quick, hopeful glance in Raven's direction and was relieved to see her looking as well.
The sky was filled with stars, and the changeling couldn't remember seeing a sight like this since he was a kid in Africa. On clear nights, his parents had always liked to watch the sky, and Beast Boy had often joined them. They made a game out of it, seeing who could find the most constellations and who would be the first to see a shooting star. His mother always told him to make a wish when they finally found one but he never had. Back then, he hadn't thought there was anything he needed to wish for.
His teammate nodded. "They're beautiful."
"Yeah," the changeling agreed. This was progress. She might still have been annoyed, but at least she wasn't giving him the silent treatment. "And, hey, look—there's the North Star."
Raven stared but shook her head. "I don't see it."
"Right up above us. See?"
"No."
Beast Boy pointed again, looking at her to make sure she was following his directions. He thought that the North Star was connected to some constellation but he couldn't remember which one and could only locate it due to the memory of its brightness. "Raven, it's right there."
"Where?" She demanded, frustration creeping into her voice.
Beast Boy was feeling a little irritated himself. "There! Right up there in front of your face!"
The Azarthian was either more tired than he had previously thought or was spiraling once again into a mood that might lead her to ignore her pacifist up-bring and slap him upside the head. "Beast Boy, 'right up there' happens to be an inestimable amount of stars! Be more specific!"
"It's the really shiny one!" the changeling exclaimed. He almost asked his teammate if all girls had tempers like this, but upon noticing the incredulous expression on her face, he decided it was probably in his best interest to stick to the subject.
"…you're kidding me, right?"
"What?"
"They're stars! They're all shiny!" Raven exploded in exasperation.
"But this one is really shiny!" The changeling honestly didn't know how else to describe it to her.
Raven huffed. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"I do, too! My dad taught me!" His sharp assertion caused his dark teammate to fall silent. "It's easy to get lost in Africa but no matter where you are on the planet, the North Star is always in the same place. As long as I knew which direction the place I wanted to go was, I just had to find the North Star and I could get to where I wanted to go. So I do know what I'm talking about and if you can't see it, it's not my fault."
Neither of them said anything. It was the most uncomfortable silence he could remember sharing with Raven in a long time but Beast Boy was determined not to break it this time.
Ten minutes passed before Raven decided to. "If we can't talk civilly, maybe we shouldn't."
"Whatever."
"Fine."
"Fine," Beast Boy echoed crossly. Moving so to another log so that there was about six feet between them, he plopped himself unceremoniously on the ground and turned his face away from her. After a few minutes, a breeze picked up and the changeling shivered as he realized for the first time that the temperature had dropped significantly since they had gone to bed a few hours ago. The fact that the rain—which, along with Robin, he completely blamed for his current predicament—had effectively put out the fire didn't help matters much. Pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, he tried to conserve as much body heat as he could, and his frustration only lasted for a few more seconds as he wondered if Raven was cold as well. Her blanket seemed to be pretty light, and after a quick glance in her direction, he saw that she was wrapped up in it but doubted she was actually very warm.
"Hey, Rae…you're not cold, are you? 'Cause I can morph into a bear or something—"
"I'm fine," she interrupted shortly.
Beast Boy frowned. "But that blanket—"
"Is made from the same material as my cloak so it's quite warm," Raven finished for him. She was still being pretty curt with him so Beast Boy doubted she wanted to talk to him any more.
And that's fine with me, he thought as his previous indignation returned. He was just as tired and frustrated as she was and since his shirt was still a little damp, he was even colder than she was. But at least he wasn't taking it out on anyone. Their situation was a pain in the ass—literally, because the ground was really hard, and even though his butt was beginning to go numb, he was still uncomfortable—but he had done everything he could to make it better. He had even offered to help her out. The least she could do was try to be nice to him, but no, kindness was above the great and powerful Raven.
He was still mentally grumbling to himself when Raven suddenly asked a question. "Why don't you turn into something warmer?"
"Because I walked ten miles today with forty pounds on my back," he replied moodily. He would have left it at that, but she was looking curiously at him, and it wasn't often that Raven looked particularly interested in anything he said. "My body hurts, and it'll only get worse if I start changing."
"Oh," Raven said, frowning speculatively. "I didn't realize that morphing physically affected you. Beside the obvious, I mean."
"It doesn't unless I stay in a form other than human for too long or I'm already sore to begin with," Beast Boy explained with a grimace. A throbbing ache was steadily moving up his back, and he was sure the pop his knees would make if he tried to stand up would echo across the valley. "I could still change if I wanted to, but I'd feel even worse tomorrow if I spent the night as something else."
She nodded in understanding, and Beast Boy figured that the conversation was over until the dark girl spoke up again. "But—a second ago, you offered to change into a bear," Raven pointedly reminded him.
Beast Boy shrugged, wrapping his arms tighter around his legs. "Yeah, well, I figured you were cold. I didn't know you had your super-special cloak of warmth with you."
"So…you're just going to sit there and shiver?"
"Yes," the green teen answered dully. He hoped it was actually later than he thought it was and that morning wasn't too far off. If it was, life was certainly going to suck tomorrow morning. Thanks to the cold, the soreness in his limbs was going to be twice as bad, and even hiking around without his pack would be a nightmare. The muddy terrain would probably make the trek even more difficult, and even if the clouds had cleared up pretty quickly, Beast Boy knew that, with his recent luck, another torrential downpour was probably in the cards. Plus, Raven had never been a figurative happy camper so he highly doubted spending what was sure to be a sleepless night without a tent would turn her into a literal one. She'd probably blame him for everything, too, which would only make their strained friendship even worse.
Beast Boy was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't noticed Raven was talking to him until a pebble encased in black energy smacked him in the ear. "Ow! Dammit, Raven, what was that for?"
"That was for not paying attention when I'm telling you to get over here," she said impatiently, holding her arm out expectantly.
For the second time that evening, Beast Boy found himself gaping at her. "Um…what?"
Raven rolled her eyes. "Once again, Beast Boy, you have excellent hearing. There is no need for me to repeat myself."
Cautiously, the changeling inched closer to his teammate until her arm and the blanket were wrapped awkwardly but securely around his shoulders. The effect wasn't immediate and the blanket was just barely large enough to shelter them both, but it was not long before most of the chill in him to fade away. Feeling a great deal more comfortable but still quite wary, he moved until he could lean his side against hers. He half-expected her to shove him away then but was relieved that she didn't. When she leaned back against him, however, his relief accelerated into shock.
"Why're you doing this?" Beast Boy asked suddenly.
For a split-second, she fixed him with an unnamable look that made his stomach flip, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared, and in its place was a smirk. "Your teeth were chattering. It was obnoxious."
The changeling stared at her before laughing. "That wasn't nice, Rae."
"I'm not nice, Beast Boy." But her smirk had already softened into something gentler. He'd never seen her look at him like that before, and the night was suddenly a bit warmer. Maybe Raven thought so, too, because she continued with, "Things have been…tense between us lately."
"A little," he conceded, not wanting to upset her or ruin the moment. He was actually a little proud of himself that he could now recognize that they were in the middle of a moment.
"I know Cyborg and Starfire talked to you about that. I'm sorry."
"It's okay. I know they were trying to tell me something." And then he felt the moment turn awkward, because the question was there, hanging in the air above them, and someone was going to have to address it. She had started this conversation, but it only seemed fair to let her know he wanted to have it, wherever it led them. "Uh. Are you going to tell me what they wanted me to know?"
Hesitance flitted across her face before he felt her shoulders square against his. "I care about you, Gar," she said and the fact that she used his real name told him just how serious this was. "And…not just as a friend."
Beast Boy blinked. "Oh." His brain seemed to clunk audibly into place, and a lot of things—not everything, because he doubted he would ever completely understand the girl next to him—about Raven and the way she'd been acting made sudden, disorienting sense. "Oh."
"Yes."
"Really?"
"I'm just as surprised as you are, Garfield." That might have been a dig at him, but he let it go. There were more important things to consider.
Like the fact that Raven had feelings for him. He was reasonably sure that particular realization was going to be taking up most of his thoughts for a long time.
"Have you really not noticed?"
"Remember my general obliviousness?" Beast Boy felt that warm feeling all over again, especially when the corners of her lips quirked up. "But no, I just…I never thought about us, I guess."
"You didn't?"
His smile turned a bit embarrassed. "Fine, maybe sometimes. But then I'd think there was no way because I'm me and you're…well, you." Something like hurt flashed across her face, and he rushed to continue. "I'm complimenting you, Rae. Or at least, I'm trying to. I think I'm failing."
She looked down at the mushy ashes but her voice was affectionate. "I might be willing to give you another chance."
"Okay." He inhaled and then exhaled—and then inhaled again. "Okay. You're amazing, and I more than like you, and—I want to take you out."
"I would like that."
The lamp only produced a dim light, but he had good vision even in relative darkness. He caught the smile on Raven's face as well as something else. Beast Boy nudged her gently. "Hey, Rae, you're not blushing, are you?"
"Beast Boy, if you think it's cold out here, how cold do you imagine that lake we passed on the trail is?" He had no doubts she could teleport him to it.
"Shutting up."
The silence was far, far less suffocating this time. Eventually, he worked up the courage to place an arm around her shoulders. When she accepted it—with a raised eyebrow and tiny smirk in his direction, of course—he felt like the strangeness of the last few months meant nothing. How could it, when Raven actually took the initiative to lean more firmly against him?
And Beast Boy couldn't help but grin when she asked, "So…where's the North Star again?"
After another hour of looking, he still couldn't get her to see where the damn north star was—wasn't she usually more observant than this?—but it didn't bother him as much as it had before. He was discovering that there was something nice about sharing a blanket, the ground, and the sky with Raven.
They weren't going to get much sleep tonight, and morning was still a few hours off.
Beast Boy didn't mind the wait.
