CMZ does it again.
"Tension on tour for Valentine & Co.?
The embattled and controversy clouded Cat Valentine was seen screaming obscenities backstage yesterday afternoon.
According to sources in the Valentine camp, the argument between Valentine and Austrailian lover Cameron Brooks was "Heated and loud."
Apparently their make-up session later that night was the same, according to the same sources.
Valentine has still declined all interview requests about the controversy in Seattle stemming from the dramatic unveiling of her daughter Sydney on stage.
Numerous parental guidance groups, such as PAL and the Manhattan Center of Parenting have called on Valentine to cut short her tour and spend time with her daughter.
Our reporter following the Valentine tour said that Valentine has continued to be overbearing, resulting in another crew member quitting, bringing the number to 8."
8?
Dang Cat.
She can be cold hearted and heartless (Copyright Hollywood Arts 2011), but I didn't know overbearing and bitchy came with it.
Maybe it's the stress of a 6 month long tour.
Could be because she misses Sydney.
"Better? Better?' I hear Danielle talking to Sydney, as she came back from changing her diaper.
"I thought you'd say something like that." Danielle then said, coming towards the computer.
Then I heard Danielle go "WHOOSH!" and I knew what was coming.
She had Sydney by the arms, and lifted her over my head and held her in from of me.
"Play with me daddy! Who cares about the computer, play with meeee!" Danielle said, making Sydney go from side to side.
Sydney smiled and giggled.
"Play with me. Play with me." Danielle said.
"Ok ok. I'll play with you." I joke, grabbing Sydney.
Danielle let go of her arms and Sydney wrapped them as far around my neck as they could go.
I stood up.
"You might want to look at that." I gesture to the computer.
"What is it?"
"Sydney's mom on CMZ." I say.
"No way!"
Danielle darted to the computer.
I'm pretty sure we might have a CMZ episode when Cat and Danielle meet.
Danielle does not approve of Cat's…let's call it mothering style.
But that's beside the point.
The point of today is that Jade, Beck and Andre are coming for lunch after I sent a line item yesterday describing what went down yesterday.
Danielle had the idea of catering food and just having lunch here.
After a flurry of texts, we settled on sandwiches.
Jade had the idea of evilly charging Cat for them.
Knock knock.
Sydney turned to the door and I began to walk towards it, but then it just opened.
"Jade!" I hear Beck say.
"Oh they know us…" Jade replied, walking in and immediately walking away from us.
Beck immediately shook his head.
Sydney made a noise and he smiled and came to take her.
"Hey kiddo! How are you doing?" Beck smiled.
Sydney giggled as Beck tickled her tummy.
"Where'd Jade go?" I asked.
"Bathroom. The baby has reached her bladder." Beck said flatly.
I shook my head as Danielle laughed.
"How are you Danielle?" Beck looked away from Sydney and smiled.
"Same old news. Nothing exciting. I have to go to class in 30 minutes though. But the food is in the kitchen."
"Class?" Jade said, emerging and immediately getting Sydney to grab for her.
"Yeah. Sorry." She said as Jade grabbed Sydney.
"No, don't be sorry. I'm sorry for you girl." Jade said.
Danielle laughed.
Then another knock on the door came.
"It's open!" I yell out, getting a look from Syddo.
In walked Andre…and Tori.
The room was filled with an icy silence for a second.
"Hey Tori. How's it going Andre?" beck smiled.
Tori seemed to shrink under Jade's fierce gaze.
"It's good man. How's Sydney?"
"She's good. I think." Beck said.
"She's good." Danielle said, getting Jade, Beck and I to laugh.
"Why are you here?" Jade bluntly asked Tori.
"I wanna be more involved and around? I have to start somewhere." She said, then smiling and waving at Sydney.
"No you don't." Jade said.
"Babe." Beck said softly.
Danielle and I exchanged glances.
She didn't believe me when I told her Jade and Tori don't get along great.
"No. She can't just waltz back in." Jade said firmly.
"I'm not. I want to start fixing my mistakes now if that's ok with you." Tori said, adding attitude at the end.
I stepped up.
"Girls! Stop. Food's in the kitchen. No more talking about that." I say firmly.
"Yeah, we're here about Cat." Andre said, holding Sydney.
Jade marched off to get food, while Sydney found Andre's feet and pushed off her knees to bounce up.
"Whoa! Easy girl." Andre smiled.
"Hey Robbie, what's with the baby food?" Tori asked, looking to the table.
I just got back from the store like an hour ago. Looks like I forgot a bag.
"Oh. Sydney is supposed to try food tonight."
"What?" Jade and Beck yelped as Tori beamed.
"Go Sydney!" She cheered.
"Are you sure she's ready?" Jade asked.
"Yeah, she's eating like a machine. She went thru an entire package of formula last week. And we're on our biggest bottle nipple size." Danielle said.
Beck gave her an odd look.
She does know what she's talking about. She's made me sleep in my room with her the last two nights after Sydney fell asleep. Her being around seems to calm Sydney down at night.
And she has been helping me out, which has been great.
"Can she try now?" Andre said.
"I don't know…it'll be her first time and—" I begin.
"We're trying it." Tori said forcefully.
"For once I agree." Jade said snarkily.
"Fine. Can we get to Cat now?" I said, as Danielle marched towards the back for some reason.
"Sure." Beck said, walking to the kitchen now.
The girls except for Danielle have their sandwiches.
Andre has Sydney.
"Why was CPS here again? Was it really just to talk?" Andre asked.
"Yeah, basically." I say.
"Weird." Beck said.
"Uh huh. Have you done anything about the temporary custody thing?" Jade asked me.
"Already signed. Taking it by the courthouse on my way to work tomorrow." I say.
"Great. That'll make me feel a little better." Jade admitted.
"Huh?" I say.
"She's been worried about Sydney with cat not being around." Beck answered.
"It's nothing personal dude, I just don't like her not having a backup plan." Jade said quickly.
"Well, that's why I'm here.' I joke as Danielle finally came back, toting the high chair.
"Uh oh. High chair time." Andre joked.
We all laughed.
"I'll get the applesauce, but then I gotta go." Danielle said, not sounding thrilled.
"Already?" I say.
"Yup."
Everyone seems sad she has to go.
Andre moved to put her in the high chair as I went and got Danielle's purse and put it by the door.
"Good luck." She joked.
"Thanks." I smiled.
She kissed me goodbye and then left.
I turned to everyone else smiling devilishly.
"Cute." Tori said.
"Yeah yeah…" I say, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a plastic, kid safe spoon.
Sydney seemed to like her chair and made a noise.
An intelligible noise.
"Ah ah."
WHAT?
"Hey!" Beck said.
"That's not a word. Is it?' Tori seemed to appeal to everyone else.
Jade, who was in front of Sydney, smiled.
"Ah ah." She said back to Sydney.
"Not a word. Getting there." I smiled.
Jade had already opened the applesauce, which is one of those small ones. The ones that you swear you can scoop it all into one bite.
"What do we do?" Andre asked as I grabbed a chair and turned it to face Sydney.
"Don't stare. At least not openly." I joke.
I get a little applesauce onto the spoon.
But Sydney is more interested in Jade's sandwich.
She's making a grab for a hanging tomato.
"Sydney. Sydney?" I say lightly.
She turned around, looking kind of guilty.
Her mouth is half open.
I offer the spoon, and boom.
In her mouth.
She kind of lunged at the spoon, but we'll work on that.
"That didn't take long." Jade joked.
Sydney looked awkward, but was smacking her mouth.
"Yummy! Human food! Better than baby food." I say.
Tori and Andre laughed.
I can feel all of them looking at me and Sydney.
Sydney closed her mouth but kept moving her tongue.
"She looks so confused." Beck said.
"It's a little different than what she's used to." I play along.
"She was ready for it. Did you see the way she went after it?" Andre said.
"She was all like 'GIMME!' and it was gone." Jade smiled.
Sydney looked back to Jade's sandwich.
I get more applesauce.
Jade got Syd to look over.
Again, her mouth was half opened.
And again, she lunged it into her mouth.
"Vigorous. I'll take it." I say.
Jade is just smiling.
I hear a click and glance to see Andre took a picture.
Sydney made a noise.
"Applesauce. It's applesauce baby." I say.
She made a grumpy sound.
"Ok, I'll get more…" I say, quickly getting more out.
This time Sydney watched the spoon into her mouth.
She blinked a bunch as the applesauce went down.
"Hey Robbie?" Jade said.
"Yeah?" I say, cleaning Sydney up.
A little came out that time.
"I was thinking, and beck agreed with me. Why don't I take Sydney to meet Cat out on tour? So you get a break to chill or work or whatever."
"That sounds like a plan." Andre said.
"Not bad. When'd you think of it?" I say, getting more applesauce.
"A couple of nights ago after we came up with the baby's name." She replied.
I freeze, as I processed what she said.
"Oh really, what'd you decide?" Andre asked.
Is it—
"Ellie." Jade said softly, smiling.
Yes.
Oh my god.
I swallow and try to focus.
Sydney makes another noise to get my attention.
"Ellie. That's a nice name." Tori said.
Like mother, like daughter.
"Have you chosen a middle name?" I choke out.
Oh crap that was noticeable.
"No. You ok?" Jade said.
"Yeah…I was thinking of Cat for a sec. Sorry." I said quickly.
I wonder if she'd think I'm crazy if I told her about my dream.
Sydney and Ellie.
Beck texted me a day or two ago and said the due date was early to mid November.
That would put them in different grades.
But for some reason I remember thinking that they were attached at the hip.
They have the same classes.
Sydney banged her hand against her chair, getting my attention.
"Sorry." I said, offering her more applesauce.
Down it goes, another lunge.
"It feels so weird that all this is going on without Cat being here." Tori said.
"I know." I said, acknowledging the awkwardness that hangs around seemingly every night when I put her to bed.
Jade gives me a look.
I guess she bought my 'It's fine.' BS.
Sorry.
I offer another spoonful, and this time Sydney turned away.
"No?" I say, surprised.
Sydney tried to get to Jade by reaching for her hair.
"Ok, I guess you're done." Jade said, taking her out.
I look down to see about 2/3 of the container left.
"I'll finish that. Just let me have a different spoon." Andre said quickly.
Tori smiled.
"I got it." I say.
Jade took Sydney into the living room, causing the rest of them to follow.
I quickly downed the applesauce.
Then my phone started ringing.
Beck quickly brought it to me.
I don't recognize the number.
"Hello?"
"Is this Robbie Shapiro?" A man asked.
"Yes, who's this?" I ask, walking into the foyer.
Everybody is looking at me funny.
"This is Richard Brenner, president of Deka. How are you?"
I freeze again.
"I'm fine sir. How are you?"
Jade mouthed "Who is it?"
I grab paper and a permanent marker and write "It's the prez of Deka!"
All their jaws drop. Everybody except Tori look nervous.
"I'm good. Do you have a moment, I'd like to speak to you about your tour."
"Yeah, I have a moment." I say.
I write "Tour update."
Beck started smiling and pumped his fist.
Tori gave him a confused look, and then he whispered something to her.
She instantly seemed to understand.
"Great. I just got off the phone with Cat Valentine, and she explained why you hadn't been on tour in so long."
I brace myself for bad news.
"Ok."
"I wish you would have said something to us Robbie. I certainly understand the situation, but from our end until now you just hadn't gone on tour in 7 months."
"I know sir. It just seemed like an excuse to me. Did she explain the circumstances?" I say.
She did it.
I think.
"She explained it adequately. Apparently the child is not yours but you're taking care of her?"
"Yes sir." I say, pumping my fist.
Everybody smiled.
"Good. I spoke to the person in charge of your tour, and we think we've worked out a solution. Are you ready?"
"When you are sir."
"Ok. We know it might take time to find someone to watch Sydney I think her name is. Maybe grandparents or somebody. But we do want you on tour, even if it's one or two shows. We can keep it local so you can stay nearby. But the thing we don't want to do is fire you. You just are helping out your famous friend, and you shouldn't be penalized."
"What about a staff sir?" I asked.
Jade and Beck let out shocked noises.
"We have marketing pros here that can be flexible and work out that end. You just focus on you and the baby and figuring a schedule out. We believe in you Robbie. You're one of the best comics I've ever seen. That's why I signed you on the spot 2 years ago. You have star written all over you. Fate might have intervened, but we're not going to let that stop us from putting you on that marquee."
I can't stop smiling.
"Thank you sir. I'll do that."
"Great. Now if you write down this number and call me when you have your ducks in a row, we can make some magic ok?"
"Will do." I reply.
"Ok. I'll talk to you then."
"Ok. Bye."
I hang up.
"So?" Tori asked, looking hopeful and slightly smiling.
"I'm not fired." I smile.
"Yes!" Jade said, then hopped up and tackled me into a hug.
"What'd he say?" Andre asked.
"Well, Cat called him and explained things. They understand and wish I would have spoken up. What I have to do is find somebody to watch Sydney and they'll do the heavy lifting." I explain.
"That's great!" Tori smiled.
I walk over and sit next to Sydney, who is sitting up like a big girl and looking at me.
"Thanks Syddo." I pick her up and hug her.
She replied by attacking my cheek with her open mouthed kiss.
"Aww." Jade said.
"Did she kiss you?" Tori said, sounding surprised.
"I think she did." Beck smiled.
Cat POV
No.
No no no!
Why'd I have to look at Splashface!
Right at the wrong moment.
I glance at my phone again to see the profile.
Andre Harris.
Under that is a picture he posted.
Of Sydney with a spoon in her mouth.
"YUM! Applesause! #HumanFoodRocks"
I…
I missed it.
She had applesauce…23 minutes ago at least.
And I'm in freaking Detroit, Michigan watching it rain.
What else am I missing?
