Day 50: Liminal
I do not own Hetalia.
One would think that it'd be the original that would be able to tap into the memories of all of the parallel universes out there. It's pretty disturbing, actually, to know that all that he is is not his own. But that's digression.
He stands, pushing his hands through his hair. Would the country-him not go so mad? There are millions of years fighting for his attention, warring through his head- he is South Korea, he is a high-school student, a kindergartener, a teacher, a hitman, a-
"Yong-Soo-san, calm yourself." A grip on his arm as calm the voice brings him a little more back to himself, and he pulls his hands far enough out of his hair to look up. Honda Kiku stares back with stoic concern. It's not unwarranted, he supposes, given that this was an experimental thing. It had been touted as "a better plan for defense by increasing knowledge." Or was it not? Was that another world's set of memories?
Kiku's blank expression starts giving over to a frown, and he shakes his head a little. "I'm fine, Kiku, what do you expect out of a canc-" He stops short as Kiku's eyes widen in simultaneous horror and doubt and awe.
"Then they truly exist?" He tries to smile, but it comes out as more of a grimace.
"Either that or being high is way more hardcore than I expected." Kiku frowns in reprimand, but his eyes are still worried. He shifts on his feet, belatedly pulls his hand from Yong-Soo's arm.
He opens his mouth to say Kiku's name, then pauses. Kiku? Honda? Ilbon? Different images of Kiku swim in front of his eyes and he squints at the man in front of him in an attempt to focus. A black military uniform, bare face, and a nose that is tilted slightly to the left. He looks down- there are calluses on the hands clasped together, and the combat boots are worn.
He settles on, "Kiku." Kiku tilts his chin up, eyebrows twitching upwards.
"Yes?" Alright, so put together with the military getup and his own patient's clothes, this probably was the universe where the intergalactic war was occurring. He shoves away another wave of conflicting memories, and sits down just for something to do.
"This is killing you." Kiku says softly, brow furrowed in consternation.
"More or less. But hey, nothing ventured, nothing gained." He forces cheer into his voice, though his head feels like it's splitting open.
"But you didn't choose this- this was an order, and now-" He's never seen this Kiku so angry before, and in any other situation, he might smile. Kiku brings his arms behind his back, lips pressed into a tight line before clearing his face of all emotion.
Had chemotherapy not gone well? Had he been in a car accident? Nations healed quickly, why was he in a hospital? He shakes his head twice before digging his nails into his arm. The pain centers him in his own body, and he takes two deep breaths.
"That's kinda the thing about being in the army, Kiku. You've gotta follow orders." He blinks hard, strengthening his grip. Kiku kneels in front of him, staring into his face.
"You need to say something- what is it? Now, while I can still…" He trails off, forcing himself to picture a blank sheet of paper.
"My unit is shipping out tomorrow. To the Main Asteroid Belt." Kiku pauses, then forges on. "We are likely to be badly outnumbered, Yong-Soo-san."
His mind goes blissfully silent as the news slams into him. He glares at the white serial number on the arm of Kiku's uniform. Grounded just in time for their unit to be shipped out to enemy territory. No one could watch Kiku's back as well as he had, and here he would be, locked up safe at headquarters going slowly out of his mind.
"How long can you stay?" He asks, pulling his loose hand away from his arm. Kiku rises and gestures to a duffle bag by the doorway.
"A few hours. Until dawn, if supply lines are slow." A few hours. It seems like forever and too soon all at once. What was hours to a thing that was almost immortal anywa- He bites down on the inside of his cheek.
"Talk to me. Please." Kiku blinks, apparently taken aback, before sitting next to him on the hard bed. He launches into a quiet story about a time that Yong-Soo had apparently gotten them chased around their hometown by two angry shopkeepers and a duck. He's grateful that Kiku, as always, had known exactly what to do to make him more comfortable. He leans back, and lets Kiku feed little bits of himself back into him.
In the quiet hours of the final night, he listens to story after story, and whispers a few himself about the memories of the various Im Yong-Soo's that lived throughout the universes. He makes sure only to tell the light ones, the ones that have less intense emotion winding through them.
When Kiku rises from the bed, a grimace of discomfort on his face as he stretches his back, Im Yong-Soo has enough of himself gathered together for a proper goodbye.
"Watch your seven. You always forget. Partner up with Mei if you can." Kiku smiles, small and amused. He reaches the door and picks up the duffle, turning back a little slowly.
"Goodbye, Yong-Soo-san. I. I will pray for your speedy recovery." He frowns a little bit, then bows deeply at the waist. Yong-Soo can't leave it at that.
"I love you." It feels immensely freeing, somehow, and he's glad he said it now. He's starting to get confused again, and he knows he doesn't have much more time before it'll be impossible to straighten things out at all.
But Kiku looks stricken, and he wonders if he shouldn't have said it after all. But no. He didn't want to keep secrets from his best friend at their last time seeing each other.
"Yong-Soo-san, I-"
The siren is loud between them, and Yong-Soo smiles.
"Go."
Cuco- Thank you very much for reading through the final chapters! I have a special fondness for the boy band AU, and very much regret not having the inspiration to finish fleshing out what I had left of the story to tell.
And to everyone who read this silly project of mine, thank you very much, especially to those of you who got to the end! It took 5 years, but now I can say goodbye. Special thanks to inichuinmylife, who put up with my ridiculous chatter and handled everything with grace, kindness, and aplomb.
(If anyone is interested in the storylines that I didn't quite get to finish, come talk to me on tumblr, where I'm elviniard. I'll gladly dish out what snippets and headcanons didn't make it!)
