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The Fire Triangle—A Zootopia Fanfiction
Part One:
Fuel
Chapter 6—Nick's Story
(Continued…Pt. 2)
Judy listened to Nick Wilde's's reminiscences with a growing sense of disquiet. The way he'd described the Lanny Braunwald hustle, he might just as well have been talking about dealing with a roach infestation. That sort of callousness was nothing like the Nick Wilde she knew. Yes, Braunwald had been a crook, a sleazeball who shouldn't have been elected street-cleaner, never mind to the Zootopia City Council, but still…
Nick hadn't scammed that squirrel as part of any moral crusade to remove a corrupt politician; he'd done it to put him under the thumb of a crime boss. And okay, maybe it had happened more than ten years ago, but to hear Nick talk about it now, the con might have gone down last week.
(And he still hadn't gotten to the ticklish part of the story, the part where he'd supposedly done something that could get him ousted from the ZPD.)
And yet…and yet…
Nick's anger at the duplicity of the arctic fox Tommy Baldorsson had been both sincere and genuine; even back in his rowdy youth, there had been lines he wouldn't cross, rules that he wouldn't break. It gave Judy something to hold on to.
She settled back in her chair and continued to listen, as Nick continued to warm to his story.
"Only another fox, another hustler would have caught it, Carrots. It was a-blink-and-you-miss-it kind of move. Lucky for me, I was sitting directly north of Tommy, otherwise I'd never have…"
"What does that have to do with…? Hm, wel-l-lll, I never told you this before Carrots, but us foxes can use the earth's magnetic field to navigate and to sense movement; it's how we used to track prey under the snow, in the days before we evolved."
"No, I'm serious; it shows up as a shadow at the edge of our field of vision. It was how I first got a sense that Craig was nearby, after I left the dance and went wandering up into the hills, like I said at the press conference. Any time you see me staring hard at something while tilting my head from side to side, that's how you know I'm using it."
"Well, because it's a sense that most of my species has pretty much forgotten, Carrots. Another fox who has it down has to teach you how to use it. Tommy hadn't re-learned it, really surprising, considering he was an arctic fox; neither had Robyn or she'd have seen what he was up to. Oh yeah, Finnick uses it all the time; he's the one who taught me in fact. Oh, and I'm pretty sure he taught that Conor kid… Oops, sorry, I'm getting sidetracked again."
"Like I said, it all happened very fast. Someone a few tables away knocked a plate onto the floor and broke it. When Robyn turned to look, I saw Tommy pretended to reach for his drink…but then he pawlmed something out of his sleeve and dropped it into her glass. By the time she turned around again—and she'd been looking away for less than a second—Tommy's paw was already back where he'd left it; she never suspected a thing."
"No, I didn't try to warn her, Carrots; I had a better idea. Tommy had made just one teeny-weensy little mistake when he'd dropped that whatever-it was into Robyn's drink. Her glass had been almost empty; she needed a refill."
"And that's what popped the lightbulb over my head. It was time to start putting my status as Very Important Animal status to the test. I turned, and signaled for a waiter, and hallelujah number foursie, one of them came over right over to my table."
"There was one thing I knew that I had in my favor, Carrots. Tommy wouldn't try to get Robyn to down that drink right away; he'd want to give it minute or two so she couldn't be sure who it was that had slipped her a Mouse. And yep, just as I figured, as soon as she turned around again, he tried to make nice with her."
"'All right, all right,' he said, 'but whatever else, Robyn, congratulations on your most successful performance yet.' He had switched his back to his Micelandic accent."
"The band's best performance," she corrected him. She was like that Carrots; when it came to her music, it was 'we' not 'me.' Talk about a cold shoulder though, I thought the temperature in the Thaw had dropped something like 20 degrees, no easy trick in Tundratown. As for Tommy, he put on that hurt-little-fox look again."
"'Freki's fur! I try to offer up an olive branch and you nearly bite my paw off. Hmph, and I thought cross fox was only a reference to your color pattern. All right yes, you all did a great job, the best you've ever played, happy now?'"
"That got Robyn to soften up a little, but only a little. 'Okay, thanks Tommy," she said, meaning it…but she still wasn't going to apologize to him."
"I remember watching them talk for another few minutes...and I do mean watching; I don't remember a word either one of them said, I was too busy keeping one eye on Tommy and the other on the grey seal who had just brought my order and was waiting for a signal on the outskirts of their table; I had instructed him to hold back until I gave him the nod. For my plan to work you see, it had to be timed just right."
"Ummm, okay, there's something you need to understand, Carrots; I was up against a very tough opponent in Tommy Baldorsson. Don't let anything you've heard so far give you the impression that he was an easy mark—because he wasn't. He might have been a jerk, but he wasn't a bumbling jerk. He'd been running hustles back when I was starting middle school and he'd never been convicted of even a Class-A misdemeanor; that should give you some idea of how sharp he was. And if he figured out what I was up to, I wouldn't be toast, I'd be BURNT toast. But to stop him from messing with Robyn like that, I was willing to run the risk."
"Finally I saw Tommy's eyes stray down to her glass and then to the bottle, sitting on the table between them. That was my cue; I gave the waiter the nod, and crossed my fingers…and now I was listening, not just watching."
"Tommy reached over and picked up the bottle, lifting it up as if offering a salute, 'What say a toast, to tonight's successful gig, ya?' I heard him say to Robyn."
"She seemed to think for a second, then kind of shrugged and said, 'Yeah okay Tommy, why not?'"
"I saw him smile for a second, and then nod and lean over the table to fill her glass…just as the waiter arrived with the sparkling cider I'd ordered. 'Sir?'"
"Tommy stopped what he was doing and looked up, all surprised. "What, now? I didn't order this."
"'Compliments of the fox at the table, over there.' the grey seal answered him, pointing at me with the tray still balanced on his nose."
"Whoa, if looks could kill Carrots, I'd be six feet under right now and Robyn would be doing life without parole. When the waiter set the tray down on the table, she tried to wave him off so hard, for a second there it looked like she'd thrown a slap at him."
"And now, she was pointing at me. 'You go back and tell that red-fox jerk I wouldn't drink anything HE sent over if it was the only thing that could save my life!'"
"I heard the wait-seal stammer an apology and saw him reach for the cider again, but then Tommy spoke up. "Just a second, Robyn, let's not be too hasty, eh? If you send that bottle back without even opening it, your red fox there will get a refund, sure, now won't he?"
"Robyn almost got up and left the table. 'I don't want ANYTHING from that fox!' She was practically gekkering."
"Now let's just calm down, eh Robyn…" Tommy said…and I knew what he was thinking. If Robyn went into a nod after drinking from a bottle of bubbly that I had sent over, then I'D be blamed for it. Uh, what are you looking at me like that for, Carrots? Oh yeah, I was crazy, I'm a fox remember. Seriously, I knew what I was doing…and it was all going according to plan. I let them argue for another minute and then I did something REALLY dumb; I got up and went over to their table."
"'I-I'm sorry, I seem to have cause a problem here.' I said. (I could play the hurt-little fox-cub, too.)"
"Tommy tried to say something, but before he could get out more than half a syllable, Robyn was all over me like a cheap suit."
"'Darn right you're causing trouble you moosh-eyed jerkfce. Where the heck you think you get off sending a bottle to my table, just like that, I don't even know yer name, huh? HUH!'"
"Uh, it's Nick Wilde." I tried to tell her, and she almost bit my face off.
"'No pal, your name's MUD!" she snapped…and then she sniffed, 'and I thought for once I'd met red fox who had a little respect for me.'"
"Whoa, that was like a bayonet right through the heart, Carrots, even if I was only pretending to be a jerk in order to try and help her. Robyn actually looked a little bit hurt—and she wasn't acting."
"I raised my paws. 'Okay, okay, I'm sorry…really. I'll take this away right now.' I said, and then reached for the bottle I'd had sent over. After what Robyn had just said to me, I didn't need to pretend that I was flustered. I saw her watching me for a second, and then she grimaced and let out a whine."
"Not the glasses you red-furred idiot, those were already here!"
"'Sorry, sorry,' I said, putting them back tout-suite. Then I grabbed the bottle and began slinking back to my own table. I hadn't gone more than three steps before I heard Tommy's voice from behind me."
"'Hey…Wilde!'"
"I turned, and saw him and Robin raising glasses in my direction—FULL ones."
"We offer a toast to your wit, your wisdom, and your sense of style," he said, "which should give you some idea for how desperate a fox can be for a drink."
"They laughed, and then the both of them slammed their drinks, right at the same time. For nearly half a minute, nothing happened…and then all of a sudden Tommy got a sudden look of concern on his face. 'Robyn, are you all right? Is anythinnnng…?"
That was as far as he got before he realized it. I saw him put his paw to his throat and then reach for his glass again. He couldn't manage it; his fingers kept slipping off the stem. Another half second, and now he was wobbling from side to side and trying to raise a finger at me. When he spoke he sounded like an old, vinyl record, being played at half speed, and his Russky accent was back again."
"Yooooou dirty sookinnnn…you swiiitch…the guhlasssessssss."
"I couldn't resist, Carrots, I saluted him with the bottle and then smirked from ear to ear."
"'It's called a hustle sweetheart.' I said, and then I dropped the Mr. Nice Nick act and bared my fangs at him. "And foxes don't do that to other foxes, you white-furred jerk!'"
"'I just had time to get it in before Tommy did a face-plant into the table, out cold."
"For a moment Robyn just stared at him, not seeming to understand…and then she looked at me with big, wide eyes. "What the…? Switched the…? Oh me Gaw, did that dirt-bag try to put something in my drink?"
"I just kind of nodded sadly, I couldn't think of anything to say. Whoa, it was like pulling the pin from a paw grenade, Carrots. Robyn's ears laid back and she bared her teeth, and then all her fur was standing on end. If you could have seen her, you'd have sworn it was Nighthowler poisoning. Then she grabbed the bottle off the table and raised it over Tommy's head. 'You no-good CREEP!' I heard her fox scream. I managed to grab her wrist just in time. All around us everyone was staring, and I could see Raymond and Kevin already hurrying in our direction.
"'Get out of here, Robyn,' I told her, 'I'll take care of them, just go!'"
"Robyn tried to pull the bottle away from me, but then she saw what was coming and bolted for the stage door; I could see that she was crying. Well, I could deal with that later, but right now…"
"As you know from our encounter in the back of Mr. Big's limo Judy, Kevin and Raymond are a couple of 'choke first and ask questions later' kind of polar-bears. On top of that, The Thaw had a 'zero-tolerance' policy when it came to patrons causing a scene. I was possibly headed for a very bad situation…but, lucky for me, I had three things in my favor. First of all, Raymond had been there when Mr. Big had lavished that praise all over me; he knew I was in good standing with his boss. Second, I hadn't been the one screaming and trying to christen the SS Tommy Baldorsson with a bottle; in fact, I'd been the one who'd stopped it from happening—and at least two other animals had seen me. And third, one more hallelujah, when Tommy had accused me of switching those glasses he'd unknowingly admitted to spiking Robyn's drink; that was how she'd known, and at least one other patron had overheard what he'd said to me."
"When Kevin and Raymond heard it, they were instantly very appreciative; Kevin even shook my paw. You see, Mr. Big didn't like it when someone spiked a drink inside The Thaw, not one little bit. The victim might end up blaming the club for what happened, and that would mean a lawsuit and perhaps him being exposed as the real owner. (Eventually something like that did happen, and he had to sell the place.)"
"Anyway, they threw Tommy out the back door, and he woke up in jail the next morning with his watch and wallet both gone."
"Yes, he did, Carrots, even before he got out of the can, he sent Robyn—and me—a message, swearing to get even. But I'll get to that in a minute, okay?"
"So after Kevin and Raymond left, I figured there was no point in my hanging around the club any longer. But just as I was getting up to take my leave, there she was again, right in front of me."
"'You okay?' Robyn asked me, chewing nervously on her lower lip. 'Not in any trouble?'"
"I flipped a pawlm back and forth. 'Naw, I'm good, they know what Tommy did; I'm in the clear…and so are you, by the way.' I felt my ears begin to fall back a little. 'But how you holding up, cross-fox lady, are you okay?' When she'd fled backstage, Robyn had been more than a little upset, and she didn't look much better now."
"She looked away from me for second. 'I-I'm getting there,' she said, and then shook her head in disgust and let out a little snarl, "Agggggh, grrrr I knew Tommy was a sleaze, but I never thought he'd go that far.' And then she screwed her eyes shut and thumped her fists on the side of her head. 'Ohhh, why did I EVER take on a creep like that to be my manager? Dumb vixen!'"
"'Hey, hey!' I told her, "Don't go blaming yourself, Robyn. Of course you trusted him, he was another fox, remember?'"
"'Yeah, right." she nodded, looking a little better—and then looking around the club. "Where is he, anyway?'"
"'Bouncers tossed him out the back.'" I said, nodding towards the rear of The Thaw."
"Robyn's ear went flat and I saw her her neck fur standing up again; 'I hope he freezes to death out there!' she growled. Sheesh, I thought she was going to bite somebody, she was so angry."
"Yes, you're right, Carrots; that was a little excessive. It made me think that maybe this wasn't the first time something like that had happened to her…or almost happened. If that's true, I never did find out. I told her, 'Won't happen, he's an arctic fox, remember? Cold won't bother him.' Lame response, I know, but it was all I could come up with on short notice."
"But that was when Robyn knocked ME for a loop. She put her paw on her hip again, and told me, 'Okay Red, one dance and that's at it.' And before I knew what was happening, she was leading me onto the dance-floor. We got there just as the Hoofers were starting their set. They opened with the song, 'And We Danced.'"
"Yes, that's right Carrots, the same number that was playing when you asked me to dance last night. That's why I couldn't…"
"No…no…NO apologies, Judy! You didn't know, how could you have known? But now you see why I was having flashbacks about her just then."
"Annnnd…okay, that wasn't the first time it happened…happened during Carrot Days is what I mean. I'd had another Robyn flashback while we were watching Erin and Conor play the talent show. Yes, that's right. Ahhh I honestly don't know, Carrots…but between the two of them, it was almost like I was seeing Robyn performing onstage again. And it hit me pretty hard, almost as hard as that second flashback. You see, it was the first time I'd had one of those episodes in—oh, more than five years. And before whenever I'd get one of those Robyn flashbacks, I could always feel it coming. Not this time; this one just hit me out of nowhere—WHAM!"
"No Carrots, I do want to keep talking about it; I…I NEED to."
"Well that one dance became another dance, and then another and another…and then we ended up dancing the night away. When we said good night, I asked Robyn if I could see her again, next Friday. She said, 'No, but call me,' and gave me her phone number. I did and we started dating."
"The first time we went out, I tried to take her to Halibuts, but I could see right away that big, fancy restaurants weren't her style. Robyn liked little, out of the way places, with great food and cozy atmosphere, the kind of spots the locals like to keep to themselves. Being a local boy myself, I knew plenty of those restaurants, so we left Halibuts and went to this little Colambian Cafe I knew of in the Rainforest district, Baranquilla. That one was home-run; Robyn fell in love with the place the minute we walked in there. And over the course of our meal, we got to know each other a little bit better."
"Robyn had come to Zootopia from Pawvidence Rhode Island, hoping to start a musical career. Before that, she had attended the Bearklee College of Music in Pawston Mouseachussetts. That surprised me, I had never figured her for a college girl; the first time I saw her, she'd had 'street' written all over her. (In fact, she was both, as I found out later on.) I also learned that we had something in common. She too had lost her dad when she was young, but there was difference, a big one; her memories of her dad, unlike mine, were NOT pleasant ones. She made it very plain to me on our first date that she did not want to talk about her father."
"And then she changed the subject, "'Looks like me and the band are going to be needin' a new manager. You know anyone who could fit the bill, Red?' That was what Robyn always called me, Red."
"With anyone else Carrots, I would have tried to play the street-smart big shot, 'Sure I do…me.' But I couldn't do it, not with this cross-fox vixen, not with her. I said, "Honestly, I don't know anything about the music business, Robyn…but I know a lot of animals who know a lot of other animals; I can ask around if you like.'"
"I did, and though I never did find anybody to take over as Robyn's manager—she took care of that herself, I did manage to help her find some replacement band members."
"Yes, that's right. Remember when you asked me a second ago if wasn't worried that Tommy would try to get even with Robyn and me? Well, he did; he put the word out on her just like he'd threatened to back at the table. Suddenly Robyn McFerral and the Hotwires couldn't get arrested. And THEN he started talking to the other band members behind her back, offering them paying gigs with other acts if they'd ditch her. Only one of them said no; the rest all quit."
"Yeah, I know, but Robyn managed to hang tough through all of it. "What happens, happens,' that's what she always said. And Tommy didn't manage to walk away clean, either. When Mr. Big found out what he'd done, he felt fursonally slighted—this had all started in HIS club, don't forget. He wanted to turn Koslov loose on that arctic fox, but Robyn said no. She did not, however, object to him banning anyone represented by Tommy Baldorsson from ever playing The Thaw—and also putting the word out that he'd 'appreciate' it, if none of that arctic fox's acts were able to find gigs anywhere else in Tundratown. When I asked her why she'd agreed to it, she just shrugged and said, 'That first thing was revenge, this is justice.'"
"Me? Noooo, before he could move against me, Tommy had bigger problems on his paws. One morning, I was in my usual spot in Snarlbucks, waiting for Finnick to show, when a wild boar came in and slid into the seat next to mine. Without looking at me, he grunted, 'I hear you got problems with Tommy Baldorsson.'"
"'Yeah.'" I said, not looking at him either.
"He snorted and still looking straight ahead, he said to me, "'Yeah, well that bum skipped town last night. If you got any idea where he's at, I got a friend who'd be willing to make it worth your while.'"
"NOW I looked at him. 'Friend, if I had any idea where that white-furred jerk was, I'd pay you to let me spill it."
"He nodded as if that was the answer he'd been expecting. And then he said, "If you hear anything, leave word with Tony at the Savanna Central Pizzeria Pianeta. Like I said, it'll be worth your while.'"
"And he got up and walked out."
"I never did find out what happened to Tommy Baldorsson, Carrots. One time, I heard he'd been deported, but that was just a rumor. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of the story."
"After our dinner at Baranquilla, Robyn and I started seeing each other regularly. The more I got to know her, the deeper my feelings for her became. Not just beautiful, but tough, smart, and funny. She had a day job working sales at Savanna Central Music. I found out later that Tommy had tried to get her fired—and ended up getting himself banned from the place instead. Robyn was very popular with the other guys at that store. I used to meet her there and take her to lunch once or twice a week, and it was during one of those mini lunch dates that it finally happened.
We were just about to sit down at a sidewalk-café table, when without warning Robyn threw her arms around my neck and kissed me. Then she brushed my face with her fingers and said it for the very first time, 'Hey, guess what Red, I'm in love with you.'"
"I was over the moon, Carrots, except…there was something kind of sad in her voice, the way she said it. Eventually I found out why."
"We couldn't see each other as often we wanted. Hustling isn't exactly a 9-to-5 job and Robyn was trying to put together a new band when she wasn't working; Tommy couldn't stop her from doing that. Like I said, I tried to help out where I could; spreading the word that she was looking for musicians, and finding her a place to hold tryouts."
"I remember going to one of the auditions she and Toby held—Oh, Toby was her drummer, the animal I mentioned earlier, the band member who stuck with her after the others left, a mule deer."
"Ohhh God, what a disaster, there wasn't one animal who showed up that day with even a shred of talent. And I knew why, it was Tommy's doing. Nobody who was any good wanted to work an artist who'd been blackballed, no matter how talented she was. But sheesh, I never thought it'd be THAT bad. I remember one guy in particular, cougar, guitar player; the first note he played caused a feedback that nearly blew out Robyn's favorite amplifier. She assured me that not all the tryouts went like that, and the next time I came by, things went a lot better. Eventually she put together a new group and they started rehearsing. There were no gigs yet; Tommy's ban was still in place, but the word on the street was that he was already on the way out."
"Mmmm, well maybe I might have had a LITTLE something to do with that rumor, Carrots. After all I did know a lot of animals. It wasn't enough to get Robyn any work, but it was enough to bring some talent to the auditions and keep them from quitting on her. There was even an upside of sorts. The animals who came to try out for Robyn's new group, were mostly unknowns from out of town, players without reputations, but lots of times with plenty of musical skills. We had one guy, a pine marten out of Quebuc named Jean-Guy Zibeline; he played something like ten different instruments, flute, tin-whistle, mandolin, harp, dulcimer, saxophone…he could even take over on piano whenever Robyn wanted to come out front on keytar, (big guy for his species.) By the time she was done holding auditions, she had a really tight group put together. "
"Then one night I got an invitation to attend Mr. Big's birthday party on the following Friday. There was no question of my not going, but should I bring Robyn along? How would she feel, being in a room full of wiseguys? On the other paw, if I went without her, what would she think; would she feel insulted? I couldn't make up my mind, and so finally I did what any cowardly fox would have done; I flipped a coin."
"It came up tails and so I bit the bullet and asked Robyn to come with me. When I came to pick her up, she was wearing simple, black dress, which was good, and had a present for the Big Shrew, which wasn't so good. Even with the all the wrapping I could tell it was only CD, a pitiful offering compared to what else he'd be getting, big diamond rings, fancy watches, one of his captains had even bought him a boat. Remember that antique chair Mr. Big was sitting in the first time you met him? That was my present."
"They were holding the party at the Timber Meadows Lodge high up in the Tundratown Mountains; this was August, and it was a warm day for the district. When we turned off the road leading up to the lodge, there was a long line of cars up ahead at the gate, waiting to get in. And there were Kevin and Raymond, checking each animal against the guest list…and then searching the vehicles; sometime they'd search the occupants too. (In the case of the rodents, two of Mr. Big's cousins handled it.) I remember glancing nervously over at Robyn, half expecting her to order me to turn the car around and take her home, but she just sat there, looking bored. When it came our turn at the gate, Kevin just gave the car a casual once-over and Raymond gave me only a quick pat-down; Robyn he left alone. Mr. Big wasn't worried about me, you see…but there were several members of other gangs who had come to pay tribute and you better believe they all got a thorough search."
"Upstairs at the lodge, it was just like I'd expected; wall-to-wall hoods. They had the banquet hall set up just the way you'd expect for mob gathering, too; a dance floor surrounded by tables; round tables not long ones. White linen tablecloths, and black jacketed waiters; there'd be no buffet for this shindig. They even had a thirty piece band playing, what else, rat-pack music."
"And there at the head table was the Big Shrew himself along with Fru-Fru and his grandmother. Robyn and I hadn't been in our seats for twenty minutes when Koslov came over and summoned us to go see him. That made me nervous, Carrots. When that polar bear had said 'us', he'd meant us, me AND Robyn; I'd been expecting the call to be for just me alone."
"When we got up out of our chairs, I tried to give Robyn some pointers as how to behave with Mr. Big, but she just waved me off, 'Relax Nick, I got this.'"
"It didn't help that when we got to where Mr. Big was sitting, he looked at her first. And I'll never forget what happened next. Robyn kissed his ring, and then she curtsied to him. And then she said, "Don Antonino, I am both humbled and honored that I, a simple working girl, should be welcomed so warmly into your birthday celebration. For the justice you have rendered on my behalf, I cannot begin to properly thank you, only offer you this small token of my appreciation.'"
"She laid the CD on the table, and Mr. Big motioned for Koslov to remove the wrapping paper. When he saw what was inside, he nearly fell right out of his chair. 'Jerry Vole, the Meerkat Hotel Tapes,' he almost gasped, and then stared straight up at Robyn. I swear, I never saw his eyes so wide. 'Where did you ever…? Do you know how long this has been out of print?'"
"'Well, that's only a copy, Don Antonino,' she told him, 'but I assure you, the sound quality is every bit as good the original.'"
"'Amazing,' he said, still staring in wonder, 'The cover even looks aged.'"
"'Well, it's amazing what you can do with Photohop these days,' Robyn told him, looking properly humble."
"On the way back our table, my jaw must have been practically dragging on the floor, because halfway there, she looked at me and winked, "Don't look so surprised Red, I grew up around the Feral Hill neighborhood back in Pawvidence. Heck, half the girls I went to grade school with had relatives in 'the life'. I ought to know how to behave around these guys.'"
"That was the moment I knew Carrots; I would never find another vixen like Robyn McFerral, and I also knew, right then and there, that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her."
"Next weekend was Labor Day weekend and the Zoolapalooza festival was playing at the Animalia arena. I took her, and then afterwards I suggested a stroll along the boardwalk before heading home. Robyn agreed right away. 'Oh yeah, much better than sitting in traffic for an hour,' she said."
"It didn't take me long to find the right spot; after a while we came to a pier that was completely deserted. Heh, and I didn't even have to ask; before I could even open my mouth, Robyn was suggesting that we go take a walk out to the end."
"It couldn't have been a more perfect night, Carrots. The sky was clear, the stars were out, and a big, crescent moon was hanging over the hills to the south of Zootopia; even the water was as smooth as glass—and Robyn had never looked lovelier."
"When we got to the end of their pier, no one else was there; we had it all to ourselves. I pretended to look around for a second and then pointed, 'Look, is that shooting star?'"
"Robyn turned to look, and then I saw her ears working back and forth. 'Sorry Nick, I-I guess I missed it.'"
"I said, 'No, you didn't, turn around.'"
"She turned…and nearly fell over backwards when she saw me down on one knee and holding out a box with a ring inside."
"'Robyn Mc Ferral, will you marry me?'"
"Ahhh, don't go dabbing at your eyes just yet, Carrots, because she said…"
"'No? B-But why not, Robyn? Don't you love me?' Aggghhh, grrr, I couldn't have eaten those words with ghost peppers; even to me, they sounded like emotional blackmail."
"If they sounded like that to Robyn, she didn't appear to notice; she took hold of my paws and squeezed them, 'Ohhh Red, you KNOW I love you, more than I can ever say." But then she sniffed and blinked tears from her eyes, "but I can't marry you.'"
"'Why not, Robyn? ' I said, getting up and almost dropping the ring in the water when I tried to put it back in my pocket; I was starting to panic. 'Is it about your career? Listen, we can find a way to…'"
"She pulled away from me, 'No Nick, it's not my career, it's YOURS! I can't marry a hustler!'"
"She turned around, hugging herself. I could see she was starting to cry. I could hear her too, talking to herself under her breath. 'Ohhh, I swore I'd never…I promised myself!'"
"Finally, she turned to face me again."
"'You ever wonder why I never talk about my old fox, Red? It's because he was hustler; that's how we lost him…and it just about destroyed my Ma, and me."
"She went on to tell me what happened, Carrots. I had to admit it was a pretty neat hustle, (though I never said so to Robyn of course.) What her father did was pretend to be an art expert, and make the party rounds with the 1% Crowd down in Mewport or the Humptons; in the winter he used to work the islands and the ski chalet circuit. A lot the animals he rubbed shoulders with had fancy artwork in their homes, and if Robyn's Dad saw one that he thought he could move, he'd start a rumor that it was a fake, (making sure it couldn't be traced back to him of course.) Needless to say the owners didn't like it when they heard. "My Winslow Hamster…a forgery? Outrageous, where do they get such rubbish?' 'I know dear, but folks are talking; what can we do? "Wait, I know; that art expert who came to our party last month, the fox, what was his name again?'"
"So they'd call Robyn's father, and when he'd get there, he'd be Mr. Sympathy. 'Sir, as much as it grieves me to inform you, I'm afraid that the verdict is yes, this painting IS a forgery.'"
Every time he did that, the reaction was always the same.
"'Ohhhh no, I'll be the laughingstock of the Gold Coast if word of this gets out.'"
"But dear, didn't you tell me that you'd had this painting insured?"
"'It's not about the money Mildred, it's about my reputation. And besides, the insurance only covers theft or fire damage, not if it turns out to be a fake.'"
"'Well, can't you get rid of it, then?'"
"It was at this point that Robyn's dad would clear his throat."
"Sir…madam, I must warn you that if you're thinking what I think you're thinking, I cannot advise too strongly against it. No one's going to even consider buying this painting without an even more thorough examination than the one I've just made. The only dealer I know of who'd even consider buying a work such as without a proper assessment would only so if it was a STOLEN artwork…blah, blah, blah…and you should absolutely want nothing to do with him…blah, blah, blah"
"Of course, there was no crooked art-dealer Judy, but the mark never knew that. Before leaving the house, Robyn's dad would always let slip a clue to the dealer's identity, 'accidentally-on-purpose.' The painting's owner would do some research, find out who he was and then send a message via a back channel that HE was interested in purchasing the 'fake' painting, (never saying that it was forgery of course…or revealing his own identity.) If there was some way the dealer could obtain it, he was willing to pay handsomely, 'and by the way, I know someone who knows someone who knows the security set up of the owner's house.' More messages would go back and forth and in the end Mr. JP Moneybags would set himself up to be robbed. It was brilliant, Carrots, Robyn's father knew that the mark would never give the cops any useful information; he was not only an accessory to burglary but also insurance fraud…and since the painting was 'stolen', whoever did end up buying it was not about go talking to the law either. Not only that; when Robyn's father would 'burglarize' the house, he would also make off with any cash or jewelry he found. And the owner never complained; his insurance always took care of everything. Better yet, not only was his reputation still intact, his friends were actually pouring sympathy on him."
"Like I said, it was a brilliant hustle, Carrots…but not a foolproof one. When one of the paintings Robyn's dad scammed a turned out to actually BE a forgery, the new owner was none too happy about it, and sent a couple of strong-arms to bring him in for a 'talk.' They grabbed him outside his rented bungalow at the Bruindance Film Festival and threw him in the trunk of their car."
"No one was supposed to get hurt, Carrots. But then they ran a red light, and a State Trooper saw it and went after them. They tried to make a run for it, but this was Mewtah in January and the roads were all slick and icy; the pair of goons took a turn too sharply, the car flipped over, and Robyn's dad didn't make it."
"'Ma and me were devastated when we found out Nick," she told me, 'and I don't mean just emotionally, although there was plenty of that too. Dad had exactly $135.00 in his bank account when he died. We had no idea where the rest of it was, and we never did find out. Wasn't long before we ended up losing the house and having to move into an apartment, and I don't mean a nice one either. Ma even had to sell the car, and go to work with United Furcel. We had enough to live on, but that was it. If I hadn't gotten into Bearklee on a scholarship, I would never have made it in, and event then I hadda take a weekend job in order to pay the bills.'"
"She started to cry again, but this time she stopped herself."
"'But the worst part Red, was that right up until the night he died, Ma and I never had a clue that my Pop was hustling for a living; he'd kept that from us both. We'd thought he was in sales; that's why he was always traveling. We never imagined he was running scams to make his money.'"
"She shook all over and looked away for a second, then back at me again. " Do you have any idea Red, what it's like to grow up with someone you love and respect, and then one day you wake up and find out he's someone altogether different, not just a guy you don't know, but a guy you wouldn't want to know?'"
"I had no idea how to answer her, Judy, and so I just shook my head."
"Robyn wiped her nose and looked at me, "That's why I can't marry you Nick, I can't go through that again, not again. I'm not gonna feel my heart jump into my throat every time the phone rings late at night, wondering whether it's you, the cops, the hospital, or some guy that's gonna whack you if he doesn't get his money back by sunrise."
"Now she did start to cry. 'Ohhhh, you red-fox jerk; why'd you have to come into my life anyway? Aggggh, grrrrr, I should NEVER have danced with you that night. I always swore I'd never get involved with any hustler," She began to sob, "but the minute we hit the floor I knew I was falling in love with one of you guys.'"
"I started to say something, but she waved me off, straightened herself up and looked at me with her eyes flashing, the way they did when she'd made up her mind and nothing was going to change it."
"'But I still won't marry a hustler, Red. That's never going to happen, never!'"
"'Then you won't have to marry a hustler, Robyn…because as of right now, I quit!"
"To this day, I don't know where those words came from, Carrots. They were out of my mouth before I realized it. But as soon as I said it, I knew that I meant every single one of them. If had to choose between Robyn and hustling, forget it; that was NO choice. It would be her, all the way and for all the rest of my life."
"'Nick?' she said, staring at me, "Wh-What do you mean, you quit?"
"To show her what I meant I got down on my knee and took hold of her paws."
"From this moment on, Robyn McFerral, I'm done with hustling, finished. I swear to you, right here and right now, that I'll never make another dishonest dime as long as I live."'
"I let go of her and got the ring out again. But before I could open the box, she covered it with her paw."
"'No, Nick...you hold onto that for a while until you make an honest fox of yourself. Then you can ask me again, okay?"
"'Okay' I said, what else could I say…except…"
"I opened the ring box again, just a crack."
"'Are you sure you don't want to take just one little peek before…?'"
"'Put the ring away, Red…now!" she snarled. And then she started laughing, 'Ohhhh, why the heck do I love you so much?'"
"And she flung her arms around me and kissed me again."
Author's notes:
The story of Robyn's father is based in part on an actual events. The Baranquilla cafe takes its name from Shakira's (Gazelle's) home town.
Easter Egg: The most common of all Disney Easter Eggs, ref to Mickey.
