February 8, 1985

Dotty gasped when her daughter walked in through the back door with her short haircut. "Amanda, what on earth have you done to your hair?"

Amanda cringed a bit and nodded. "I know. It's not what I really wanted. I..." She sighed as she sank down onto a stool. "I just wanted a change and the stylist, well, she...she cut more than I would have liked and-" She shook her head and repeated, "I just wanted a change."

"Hmm...well, it certainly is a change," her mother mused as she examined her daughter's new 'do more closely. "But are you sure this was the change you wanted and not a change to the status quo?"

"I-I-I -d-don't know what you m-mean, Mother," she stammered awkwardly.

"Don't you?" Dotty questioned. "Don't think I didn't notice you sneaking out of the house in the middle of the night just a few days ago; I assume with the intention to go see your on-again, off-again lover."

Amanda frowned at her mother's probing expression and quickly looked down to avoid her questioning gaze as the memories of the night in question flooded her senses.

February 3, 1985

Amanda let herself into Lee's apartment with the key she still had and was surprised to see him still awake, sitting on his couch clad only in his boxers and idly channel surfing. He looked up at her as she entered and gave her a questioning eyebrow. She quickly crossed the room to join him on the couch and dropped her coat to reveal the outfit she'd worn just for him. When she saw his eyes widen in surprise and he opened his mouth to say something, she quickly silenced him with a kiss.

She got a heady feeling when she felt him wrap one arm around her to pull her onto his lap astride him while the other held the back of her head to deepen their kiss, his tongue darting out to meet hers. They kissed long and slow, taking their time to explore one another for several minutes until they both became too breathless to continue.

"Amanda..." Lee sighed as he toyed with the straps of the sexy black dress with the pearl buttons that she'd worn beneath her winter coat, the same one she'd worn on New Year's Eve. "What's this about?"

She ran her hands up his muscled chest before leaning in to nip at his neck and then purred into his ear, "I think it's obvious, isn't it?" She pressed herself against him, her breasts brushing against his chest as she rocked back and forth in his lap and felt him growing hard beneath her.

"Amanda, we can't-" he began, but his protest was cut off by her mouth on his again.

Amanda was filled with a feeling of elation when she heard him let out a blissful sigh as the fire she'd always felt in his arms began to burn out of control again while his questing hands roamed the contours of her scantily-clad body, the dress barely covering her curves. She was a bit giddy in knowing that she could elicit the same kind of response in him and that feeling only increased when she lowered her hands to move between them and free him from the constraints of his boxers while his hands wandered up her thighs that were exposed by her bunched-up dress. She ran her hand up and down the length of him as their mouths clashed again and again, lips and tongues meshing. Sensing his increasing urgency, she shifted her lacy panties aside and slowly guided him inside her, delighted when he let out a low groan at the joining of their bodies.

He broke their fevered kiss and held her face in his hands, gazing deeply into her eyes as if questioning or searching for something. "Amanda, I-" he broke off as she began to move against him and instead of completing his sentence, he lowered his lips to her neck lightly nipping at the tender skin there. "I love your hair like this," he crooned as he nodded to how she'd piled her hair atop her head as he idly twirled one of the loose strands that framed her face. He lowered his head to her neck again. "Lets me do this..." he murmured against her tender flesh.

"I remember," she sighed as she closed her eyes and reveled in the sensations flooding her senses, the electricity coursing through her body as they slowly moved together. "Lee!" she cried out when he pushed aside the fabric of her dress and took one nipple into his mouth, laving it with his tongue while cupping the other with his hand. The other hand now gripped her hip to guide her movements as he pushed his own hips up against hers to deepen their connection. "Oh, Lee!" she exclaimed again as she felt him push deeper inside her.

"What the hell?" a stern, grumpy voice demanded from the doorway of the bedroom.

"Oh, shit!" Lee responded as he scrambled to right Amanda's dress and cover their activities to protect Amanda's dignity.

Amanda's cheeks reddened with mortification as she scrambled off of his lap and reached for her coat to cover herself as she was suddenly feeling way too exposed, despite the fact that her dress had been straightened. She pulled her coat tightly around her. "I-I-I-" she stammered before turning accusingly to Lee. "You didn't tell me that your uncle was still here."

"I tried, but you-" He raked a hand through his hair and let out a sigh. With a glare at his uncle, he snapped, "You wanna' give us a minute?"

The colonel nodded and escaped back into the bedroom. Once the couple was alone again, he straightened his boxers, rose from the sofa, looked at Amanda sheepishly and apologized, "Look, I'm sorry. I really tried to tell you, but you-" He reached to remove her hands from where she was holding her coat tightly closed, exposing her dress and looked her up and down appreciatively. "And I- I mean, this dress...it-"

"That's why I wore it. I remembered you complimenting me on it at the party and-" She couldn't control the flush in her cheeks knowing that his uncle had seen them having sex on the couch like a pair of hormonal teenagers. She'd had her back to him when he'd entered the room, so she wondered just how much he'd seen.

"Your hair," he completed for her. "I said something about the way you wore your hair up that night, didn't I?" As he had when they'd been all-too-briefly joined again, he searched her eyes for the truth.

"Yeah, you did; you were doing the same thing when we were dancing," she confirmed as she licked her lips nervously. She remembered one of their slow dances very well when he'd held her so close and had brushed soft sweet kisses against her lips, her face and her neck. For once, it hadn't been something he'd done for show, but because he'd wanted to. To everyone in the room, they appeared to be just a couple in love. She wanted so badly to recapture those moments as well as the one when he'd told her he loved her. She wanted them to be the couple in love that they'd appeared to be. She'd come here tonight not only because she'd wanted him so fiercely, but had also hoped that by intentionally dressing the same way she had that night, that it might somehow trigger his memories."Do...you...uh..." she hesitated. "Do you remember anything else you said to me that night?"

"I-" he began, but then quickly shook his head. "No. Not a damn thing. That night was kind of a blur. Too much damn vodka."

"I see," she replied sorrowfully as she realized in an instant that he was lying about what he remembered by the way his eyes widened just a fraction and he pursed his lips. While there were a great many things she didn't know about him, she'd seen enough of his storytelling in the field to know when he was telling half-truths. She couldn't help thinking that maybe her mother had been right and she should have said it back when she'd had the chance, but it was too late now. "I...um...I should go," she sputtered, unable to meet his eyes any longer knowing that he'd just lied to her.

"Amanda, wait," he pleaded as he reached for her hand. "I-" He broke off again.

"You what?"

"I l-l..." He shook his head. "I liked seeing you tonight...despite the unwelcome interruption."

"Yeah, me too," she replied as she gave him a weak smile. "Maybe another time when your uncle's not here. Goodnight." She hurried for the door before the hurt could show on her face that he couldn't say the words she wanted to hear, blaming herself for hesitating in the moment he'd first said it and fearing that the opportunity was now lost forever.

"Amanda!" her mother's voice sounded in a sharp tone, jolting her mind back to the present.

"Yes, Mother, I'm sorry. I was just...just thinking and I...got a bit...you know...lost in thought."

"So, I noticed," Dotty replied dryly. "But what thoughts were you lost in exactly?"

"Just...memories really. But to answer your question about my hair, it was really just an impulsive thing. You know, sometimes you just want a change, but really this wasn't quite the change I wanted." The truth was she did want her hair a bit shorter since Lee had made the comment twice now about how he liked her hair up because it gave him easier access to her neck and she loved the way his lips felt on her sensitive skin. She'd thought it would make it easier than pinning it up every time she wanted to be with him and since they were so close now to being what she longed for them to be, she wanted to make him happy.

"Well, it certainly is a change, but it will grow out again eventually," Dotty pointed out. "So...has...Lee seen it yet?"

Amanda shook her head. "No."

Their conversation was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. "Hmm...maybe that's him now," Dotty teased as she moved to answer the door.

Amanda rolled her eyes, thinking it was highly unlikely that Lee would ever ring the doorbell like a normal person without having some cover story to go with it. Sure enough, when her mother re-entered the room, it was with the father of her younger son, not her elder. "Joe, what are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you too," he quipped as he greeted her with a quick kiss. "Do you not want me here?"

"No, it's not that," she explained. "I just...I just didn't know you were coming. That's all."

He looked at her in confusion. Didn't you get the message I left on the machine? I told you I'd be back in DC soon. I even asked about what your plans were for Phillip's birthday next month."

"I never got a message. Mother?" She questioned.

"No, I never heard a message. How long ago was this?" Dotty asked.

"About three weeks ago," he answered.

"Lee..." Amanda muttered under her breath as it occurred to her that that was right around the time she'd left him alone in the house so he could finish his search. "That didn't happen to be around mid-January or so, did it?"

He shrugged. "I guess so. Why?"

"Oh...it's just I was having some trouble..." She let out a flustered sigh as she thought of Lee telling her she was in trouble with the Agency at that time. "Um...with the machine, I mean." But she knew the real trouble had been with a childishly jealous man. She hadn't forgotten his mocking, immature tone when he'd said Bryce Topping's name. She shook off those nagging thoughts and smiled brightly. "But it doesn't matter. You're here now. So, what are your plans?"

"I'm going to be in town for about two months or so, so I was hoping that I could spend a little time with the boys," he explained.

She patted his arm reassuringly. "Of course you can. You know you're welcome to see them anytime. In fact, they'll be home from school in just about an hour if you're not doing anything and truth be told, it would free me up to get some errands run."

"Well, that works out perfectly then, doesn't it?" Dotty gushed, grateful to see the pair getting along so well again despite their divorce.

Amanda nodded and stated with more conviction than she felt, "Sure does. I do need to get going though. When I was out getting my hair done, I realized that I forgot my to-do list, so I came back to get it so I don't forget anything I need for the PTA." She reached for the steno pad that lay on the kitchen counter. "Good to see you again, Joe," she added politely as she hurried out the door, her fake smile soon fading as her thoughts turned to Lee and wondering just why he'd have erased Joe's message to her. He knew she'd made him angry in her comparing the two would-be fathers to her children and that he'd been crazily jealous of her dating Bryce, but she'd never thought he'd stoop that low.

She knew it had to be another act of jealousy, she just wished she could figure out which kind he'd been feeling in that moment. Was it because Joe wanted to spend time with Phillip on his birthday or since it was clear to her now that Lee did remember some of the events from New Year's Eve, was it because he was worried that Joe might want to spend time with her as well? She supposed she wouldn't know unless she asked, but then that would open up a whole new can of worms because Lee was still unwilling to admit that he'd confessed his love for her.

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February 11, 1985

"I think she misunderstood." Amanda choked back a laugh as she watched Randi depart in a huff as quickly as she'd arrived.

"Uh...yeah," Lee replied awkwardly and then he looked down at the cake in his hands. "You...uh...want some cake?" He grinned at her.

Amanda finally let her laughter bubble forth and responded with an eager, "I would love some...cake." She walked fully into the apartment still laughing as Lee closed the door.

"You're enjoying this way too much," he teased good-naturedly as he set the cake down on the coffee table and picked up the frozen one.

"Well, come on, Lee, it's not as if she wasn't partially right in her assumption that there's something between us." She gave him a pointed look. "Even when we are dating...you know...other people."

"What's that look for?" he questioned. "You act as if I'm somehow being unfaithful to you when we both agreed we could still see other people. And that was all it was; just a date. It's not as if I was planning to ask her to spend the night. I wasn't sleeping with her if that's what you think."

"Oh, I know. I know," she said in an attempt to hide her twinge of jealousy as she sat down at the table while he went to the kitchen to deal with the other cake, though truthfully, she hadn't known that he wasn't sleeping with Randi. "I just...just...I don't know...when I came here the other day, I guess I just didn't think you'd be bringing other women here. I mean, it's your home and all, so I supposed you're free to do what you want in it." She knew she was babbling, but she was suddenly overwhelming anxious in thinking of how he'd just been making love to her on this very sofa only a week ago...before they'd been interrupted that was. "I mean, for me personally, I don't invite dates home anymore because of the boys, but I guess you don't have to worry about that."

"Look," he protested to end her ramble as he re-entered the room and sat across from her. "I only started dating again because you did," he explained. "Or have you forgotten that polo player already?"

"Well, I only went out with Bryce because YOU pushed me away!" Amanda countered leaving Lee with an open-mouthed, dumbfounded expression on his face.

He took a moment to recover, before he spouted, "But what about Joe?"

"What about him?" she questioned wondering if maybe now she wouldn't have to broach the subject of the deleted message and could get to the bottom of his behavior without causing a fight over it.

"Oh, come on, Amanda. I've been around your house the past few days to keep an eye on things to make sure no one was going to try to attack you or the kids at home. I've seen his car there and I saw you kissing him."

"Lee..." she scolded. "You've been spying on me?"

"Champagne?" He held up the bottle to avoid her question.

"Yes, please," she answered feeling she could really use a drink right about now. "But don't think that gets you out of answering my question.

Lee let out a frustrated sigh as he poured. "I wasn't spying. I already told you that. I was just looking out for you since you witnessed a murder. That's what partners are supposed to do, remember? Now, how about you answering my question about Joe, huh?"

"I will...IF you answer a question for me first. Why'd you delete the message he left me? And before you try to deny it, I know you're the only one who could have because you were the only one in the house at the time."

"Okay, I admit it," he confessed as he handed her a glass and sipped at his own. "But dammit, Amanda, you had just been lecturing me about not being a good enough father and when I heard his voice I just..." He scratched his head, set his glass down and turned his attention to the cake to avoid meeting her eyes. "I don't know. I just...I saw red, okay? He's never been around like he should be and yet, you allow him all the access he wants to the kids while I'm stuck on the sidelines." He handed her a freshly-cut slice of her homemade cake and met her gaze again.

"You don't have to be, you know. Isn't there some way things could be worked out? I know you're worried about the boys' safety, but doesn't the Agency have some kind of...I don't know...provisions in place for agents with families?"

Lee nodded as he dug into his cake and chewed thoughtfully. "This is really good," he complimented her. She smiled in response as he continued, "And to answer your question, yes, they make accommodations for agents with families, but the problem is that you're not an agent. You're not even a full-time employee-"

"Oh, well, thank you very much." She rolled her eyes as her smiled turned into a scowl. "You're starting to sound like Francine."

"Amanda, would you just hear me out before you go flying off the handle here?" he grumbled. "As I started to say, because you're not technically a field agent, or a full-time employee, the Agency won't get involved unless they know there's an imminent threat."

"Hmmm..." Amanda dug into her cake, chewing on his words as she chewed on her cake. "So, is that why you were so gung-ho about us getting married for real in San Angelo; because then the Agency would have to get involved if you had children to protect? 'Cause that doesn't make a whole lot of sense when you were also suggesting keeping it to ourselves." Of course, if either of them were willing to come clean publicly about Phillip being Lee's son, it wouldn't be an issue either.

"That was part of it, but only one small part. When I suggested keeping it a secret, I didn't mean forever...just long enough for me to really be accepted as part of the family." He let out a sigh as he took another sip of his champagne. "But it's a moot point now since Joe's your family guy," he muttered in annoyance.

"Oh, he is not!" Amanda protested loudly.

"Then why were you kissing him?" he questioned.

"Lee, that was nothing. Just friendly and not romantic in the slightest," she explained. "Something you're going to have to accept is that even though we're divorced, Joe is always going to be a part of my life. It's just like you once told me that you and I would always be connected because of Phillip. Well, the same thing applies to him because of Jamie. One more thing, I do love him and I always will..." When she saw Lee's face fall in disappointment, she added, "But not like I lov-" she broke off abruptly when she saw his face light up hopefully, willing herself not to let her emotions show too much. "Not like you should love someone you want to spend your life with. Besides, you kissed Randi the same way when she was here the other night, just a quick little peck on the lips. Didn't seem like there was that much there." She took a bite of her cake to suppress her smile at that thought.

He looked at her curiously. "You mean...not like there is with us?" he crooned as he moved from his seat and sidled up next to her.

"I didn't say that, but I did get to thinking about the cheap wine...the cheap cake...and thought...well, that seemed to me that you thought of her as a cheap date."

Lee couldn't help laughing at her bluntness. "You're starting to sound like my uncle."

"Speaking of your uncle, you never did tell me what happened after he...um..." Her face turned red as the memory of the colonel walking in on the two of them making love flashed through her mind.

"After he caught us in flagrante?" he finished for her with an impish grin at the blush in her cheeks because he knew from experience just how uninhibited she could be, but yet he found it amusing that she still had trouble at times talking about certain aspects of their sex life.

She gave him a scathing look. "You know very well that's what I mean. So, did he...uh...did he say anything?"

"You better believe he did and it wasn't pretty. I felt like a damn teenager all over again," he complained as he began to relate the story to her.

February 3, 1985

After Amanda's abrupt departure, Lee let out a deep sigh of disappointment and sank back down onto the couch, burying his face in his hands and mentally kicking himself for getting so lost in the moment that he'd neglected to tell her that his uncle was still staying with him until he'd completed filing his reports with the Pentagon.

"I heard the door slam so I assume it's safe to come out now," his uncle said from the doorway of the bedroom causing Lee to look up at him with a frown. "I'm guessing she left in a hurry."

"Do you blame her?" Lee fired back as he rose from the couch and stomped to the bar to pour himself a stiff drink. "What the hell were you doing up anyway?"

"Someone woke me up with their shenanigans," Robert answered pointedly and then added, "Pour me one while you're at it." Lee only nodded and for a moment the only sounds in the room were those of tinkling ice cubes and liquid being poured. Lee turned to hand a glass to his uncle and both took a swig before the older man spoke again. "I'm disappointed, Son," he scolded disapprovingly.

"You're disappointed in me? There's a big damn shock," Lee snarled sarcastically. "In case you hadn't noticed, I'm an adult...and for that matter, so is Amanda."

"Don't get smart!" his uncle snapped. "I mean in the way you're treating Amanda. She's the mother of your child and you're behaving as if she's just another one of your vacuous whores. She's different and she deserves better."

"Don't you think I know that?" Lee responded angrily. "And just how is it that you think I'm treating her like those...other women? Just because you walked in on us making love?"

"Is that what you call it? I think you're overly romanticizing it, Skip. From what I saw-" He halted hastily and shook his head.

"What?" Lee demanded. "Go on! Say it!"

"Say what? What can I possibly say? You're damn-near thirty-five years old now. I think we're long past the time for me to be giving you the bird-and-the-bees talk. I just thought you'd have a little more respect for a woman who gave birth to your child than to treat her like some damned dime-store floozy. A woman like Amanda, she deserves better than that...better than you."

Lee sighed and sank back down onto the couch, idly swirling the contents of the glass in his hand. "You're right," he admitted. "I'm not good for her, but when I'm with her..." He looked down at the floor as he tried to compose his thoughts. "When we're together and she looks at me with those big soulful eyes of hers, all I can think about is how much I want to just lose myself in her and let her take the pain away. When she came here tonight, I...I tried so hard to resist what I feel for her, but then when she kissed me and...and touched me...and that dress...Man, that incredible dress..." He trailed off as his emotions threatened to get the better of him.

"You're in love with her," the colonel stated plainly. He sat opposite his nephew with a shake of his head. "I never thought I'd live to see the day when you'd actually open your heart up enough to allow yourself to fall in love."

"Yeah," Lee confessed as he met his uncle's eyes. "God, I love her so much it hurts. It tears me up inside that I can't be with her all the time."

"Then tell her," Robert said simply. "It's clear to me that she doesn't know that. Better yet, why don't you finally marry the girl so you can be with her all the time?"

"Marry her? Just like that?" Lee rose and began pacing while sipping on his scotch. "You make it sound so easy, but it's not. I've tried, believe me, but she still won't marry me even all these years later. It doesn't even seem to make a difference to her that we have a son together. I keep telling her that we should be a real family, but she-" He sighed again, slammed his drink onto the coffee table and flung himself back onto the sofa.

"Maybe that's your problem; maybe you're not asking her in the right way," his uncle deduced. "Or for the right reasons."

"Huh," Lee snorted as he thought of how very much his uncle sounded like Amanda and remembered her 'four fouls, you're out' warning.

"It's nothing less than I'd expect from him," Lee muttered as he finished his carefully-edited story, leaving out the part where he'd admitted to his uncle that he was in love with her. He remembered all too well what had happened the last time he'd tried to be that open with her.

"Well, did you tell him that I came here on my own?" Amanda asked him curiously. "I mean, if he was accusing you of...I don't know...taking advantage of me...or whatever he thought was going on, maybe it would have been better if you'd told him that I wanted to...make love as much as you did. I mean, not that I really want our private life...you know...out there, but since he'd already caught us in the act, it's not as if either of us could have denied that it happened. I guess the one good thing to come out of all of that is that he really believes I'm your girlfriend now." She laughed awkwardly as she tried to make the best of a bad situation.

Lee laughed a bit at her attempt at a joke, but then shook his head. "No, I didn't say anything like that to him. It wouldn't have done any good. He doesn't listen to reason. He just has it set in his mind that I'm nothing more than a screw-up, especially since he-"

"He what?" she probed.

Lee looked into her eyes wondering just how much he should tell her. He'd already put himself in the doghouse with her by not telling her what he knew about Francine. She'd been so pissed at him then and he knew if he told her the whole story, he'd run that risk again when they were just starting to really talk. He decided he should take the chance because he couldn't stand keeping secrets from her. "Amanda...He knows all about us...you and me...our history...about Phillip. He has for a few years now, since before you came back into my life. And because he knows on top of the fact that he knows we're not married, he thinks I'm nothing more than a deadbeat dad."

"Oh," she uttered softly as she took a sip of her champagne. "Well, that certainly explains a lot."

"About what?" he questioned.

"When he was at the house with me, he sort of commented about how hard it must be for me to be raising two boys on my own. Then we got to talking about parenting in general. I guess maybe he was trying to figure out how I felt about you...or maybe just how I felt about you not being a part of Phillip's life. I mean, he never asked me any direct questions about you...just sort of talked around it, if you know what I mean."

"Huh, that doesn't sound like him. He's usually pretty damn blunt."

"Hmm...I don't know. Maybe he didn't want to risk offending me or upsetting me. You know him better than I do. What do you think? Why do you think he'd behave differently around me?"

Lee snorted. "You're asking me? I spent eleven years of my life living with the man and I still don't think I know him."

"I kind of got that impression," she observed with a hint of sadness in her tone. "I guess that's something you and I can both relate to, huh?"

He gave her a bewildered look. "I don't know what you mean. You get along great with your mom."

"I meant between you and me," she explained. "Nearly thirteen years have passed since we first met and I sometimes wonder if we know each other. It's talks like this that make me feel that way; when we start sharing things that we should have shared a long time ago."

"Amanda, there's so much I want to share with you. I just...I'm not good at this...this opening up stuff." He thought back to his uncle's words about him opening his heart and realized while it was partially true, he still couldn't bring himself to fully let her in for fear of her seeing just how damaged he was. Could she still care for him at all once she learned how broken he was inside?

Amanda nodded in understanding, reached for his hand and gave it a light, reassuring squeeze as she thought of how both Emily and Francine had warned her to be patient with him. "I'm not in any hurry," she told him sincerely.

Lee breathed a sigh of relief that she didn't press him for more than he was ready to give in the moment. "Thank you," he responded gratefully as he picked up her hand and placed a tender kiss to it.

"You're welcome." She smiled at him and set her glass down. "I'm glad we talked, but I need to get going. I may not be mother-of-the-year, but I'm still a mother all the same and I have children expecting me at home."

As she rose from her seat, Lee stood with her and took both of her hands in his. "Hey, you're still mother-of-the-year in my book. Your boys...they are so lucky to have you. I couldn't have asked for a better mother to my son."

Tears pricked her eyes at the sincerity of his statement helped along by his feelings for her showing visibly on his face in his warm smile highlighted by his adorable dimples and the light in his eyes when he gazed at her. She removed one hand from his and lightly caressed his cheek and he placed a kiss to her palm in response. "I...uh...I sh-should g-g-go," she sputtered before her emotions could override her common sense.

"Stay," he pleaded as he held her hand tighter. "I mean, why waste the champagne and candlelight?"

"No, Lee...not when you set all this up for another woman. No way. If there ever comes a time when you want something like this to be just for me, then...well...maybe."

"Okay, I can see that. I was a jerk for asking," he conceded his uncle's word about treating her like the other women in his life haunting him. "But I'll try to do better."

"I'll be looking forward to it." She gave his hand one more squeeze, brushed a feather-light kiss to his lips, and softly whispered, "Goodnight."

He reluctantly let her go and watched longingly until she'd disappeared through his front door, reflecting on his uncle's advice to just tell her how much in love with her he was. As much as he wanted to, his fear overrode his desire to truly be with her. He'd already said it once and her response had been to try to get away from him, so what would happen if he tried again and she didn't react the way he hoped? Would he then lose not only his lover, but his best friend too? He picked up his glass and took a long drink from it as he revisited every scenario in his head and came to the conclusion that there was only one way to deal with it...wait until she was ready and said it first.