"Meredith... It's okay." Addison said softly as she cradled her friend.
There were no tears. Addison couldn't believe it. It was like she was frozen. Meredith wasn't reacting. She wasn't talking. She was frozen. She was a statue. She was beyond comforting. She was broken.
"Honey... You had an incomplete miscarriage. I need to do a D & C." Addison said softly. "Meredith, can you hear me?" Addison asked as she walked around to the other side of the bed.
"Did you hear me?" Addison asked again as she looked into Meredith's eyes. She could tell by the shift of her eyes that she did hear her. "Do you want me to get Derek?"
Meredith closed her eyes at his name. She wanted him more than anything. But she couldn't do that to him. She couldn't put it on him. She was hurting more than she had ever hurt. For the baby. For Derek. For herself. It hurt so bad she could barely stand it. Her world was crashing.
Addison frowned as they wheeled Meredith down the hall. By now everyone was talking. Everyone was gossiping about how Meredith Grey was pregnant. Something happened. That hadn't gotten around yet. Danny was being pretty protective over her. He didn't know how she would make it. How she would pick herself up after everything she had just experienced. And he didn't even know it all.
It was the hardest thing Addison had ever done. To do a D & C. To take out the remainder of a pregnancy lost. It was unimaginable. She knew how bad Meredith was hurting. She seemed excited about the baby. No one would have believed it. The situation she was in. Pregnant with her married soul mate's child. Most would have thought it a curse. But Meredith had seemed happy. Like she had a hope that no one had seen in a long time.
They wheeled Meredith into a room. Addison had them give her light sedation. She was acting strong. Acting like nothing was hurting. But she had a feeling that when it hit her. When it really hit her. That it was going to be bad.
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Kristy heard the rumors flying around the hospital. Meredith Grey miscarried her baby. She couldn't believe it. She dropped everything she had to do. She didn't care what it was. She had to be there for her friend. Her heart broke as she ran through the hallway towards the room.
"Addison!" Kristy said as she ran up to her in the hallway. "Is it? Is it true?" She asked with tears in her eyes.
"Yeah." Addison said with a sigh. "Yes." She said as a tear ran down her cheek.
"Can I see her?" Kristy asked quickly.
"A few minutes. She's sleeping. She's been sedated." Addison said softly.
Derek was in surgery. She couldn't do it to him. She couldn't have him interrupted. She knew he had to finish his case. She also knew that Kristy had time to see Meredith before he got there. She shook her head. She had no idea how Meredith did it. How she kept it secret and balanced them both.
"Mer..." Kristy said as she sat next to her. The tears began to fall as she looked up at Meredith's pale face. "I'm so sorry, honey." She said as she rubbed her hand.
Meredith was sleeping peacefully. Kristy sat there with her. She didn't understand it. How life could be so cruel. How she could be dealt this hand. It wasn't fair. Not to her. Not to someone who had already been through hell. She sat there for a long time before she heard her pager going off.
"I have to go... I'll be back." Kristy told Addison as she ran away. Mark came rushing up to Addison.
"What's going on?" Mark said quickly as he ran up. "Is she okay? The baby. Is the baby okay?" Addison's face dropped as she looked at him. "Oh my god... Derek. Does Derek know?" He asked.
"No. He's in surgery." Addison said with a sigh. "He should be down soon."
"We have to tell him. Someone has to tell him." Mark said as he stood there in shock. "I will... I'll tell him." He said with a nod as he clenched his jaw. He rushed into Meredith's room and sighed as he looked at her.
"Oh god..." Mark said as he rushed to her sleeping side. "What are we going to do?" He asked Addison as he looked up.
"She isn't the only one we have to worry about, Mark. I have never seen Derek happier. This is going to kill him." Addison said as she began to cry.
"Addie..." Mark said as he held her.
"It's not fair, Mark. It's not fair. Fourteen years. Fourteen years they were apart. This was there new beginning. And now- Now this." She said as she sobbed in his arms.
"I'm so sorry, Mer..." Mark whispered as he kissed her on the forehead. "I have to go tell Derek." He said with a nod as he rushed off.
Mark felt sick as he walked down the hallway. His best friends. They were all hurting. They finally find each other again, and they are all hurting. He doesn't know whether to cry, or break something. Telling his best friend that his child is dead. That was something he never thought he'd have to do. And he didn't want to.
He stood there in the scrub room. Derek glanced up at him. He had to drop his gaze. He couldn't look him in the eye. If he did that, it would kill him. And Derek would know. They knew each other better than anyone. He looked back up, seeing that Derek was closing up. His stomach dropped when he heard the door open.
"Mark... What's going on?" Derek asked happily. "Mark." Derek said again after he didn't answer.
Mark looked up. Their eyes met. He didn't need to say anything. Derek knew something was wrong. Very wrong. He had never seen that look on Mark's face. Not since- Not since the day that Meredith died.
"Meredith! Oh my god!" Derek said as he quickly scrubbed his hands. "What's wrong?" Derek said as he grabbed a paper towel.
"She..." Mark said quickly.
"Mark! God damn-it!" Derek yelled.
"The baby." Mark said softly.
"What about the baby?" Derek asked.
"I'm so sorry, man." Mark told him with a frown.
"No..." He said in disbelief. "No..." He repeated. Mark wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close.
"I need to... Where is she?" He asked as he pulled away. They both had tears streaming down their faces.
Mark and Derek rushed through the hallways. Mark led the way. Derek couldn't believe it. Not until he saw her. Not until he saw it. Not until he saw her face. And the chart. And Addison. He had to see it. He felt like he was running just like he did fourteen years ago. She was dying.
"Addison!" Derek said as he rushed up. "Where is she?"
"I sedated her. She's sleeping." Addison said softly as she pointed to her room. "I'm so sorry, Derek."
"I- I can't..." He said as he walked in the room.
She was broken. He could see. Even in her sleep, her face looked like she was in pain. He walked over to the side over her bed and held her. Not for her. She was asleep. For him. He needed her. He pulled her close and looked down at her face.
"Let's leave them." Addison said with a frown as she and Mark walked away. They needed air.
"Oh god...Mer..." Derek said as Meredith moved slightly.
Derek looked down at her. She blinked softly. The reality hit her hard as she looked up at Derek's eyes. His eyes were dark. They were sad. He was broken. She was broken. She lost her baby. They lost their baby. Sobs wracked his body as he held her. Everything was ending before it began. Or at least it felt like that.
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Kristy rushed up. She finally finished all the worthless crap that she had to do. All she thought about was how bad Meredith felt. How sick she was. How it must feel to lose a part of you. A baby. She quickly walked up to the room. Her heart stopped as she looked at them. He was holding her. Derek. She had never seen him like that. So sad, yet caring. It was Derek. Derek was the father. The woman he loved. The woman who changed him. It was Meredith.
Kristy ran. She had to run. It was the only thing she could do. She felt like her world was crashing down. Everything that she knew and believed was flipped around. It was like she woke up in an alternate universe this morning.
She didn't tell anyone she was leaving. She couldn't. That was the last thing on her mind. She wasn't concerned that there may not be enough nurses on the floor. Or that Kelly Peterson needed her bandages changed. None of that mattered. Not any of it.
Before she knew it, she was there. She couldn't even process rational thoughts. She had packed a bag, bought a ticket, and now she was there. She was in front of her sister's house in Texas. She had flown to Texas. She didn't tell anyone she was going. There was no one to tell.
"Kristy?" Jessica, her sister asked as she opened the door.
Jessica looked up at her little sister. Her face was red and tear stained. She looked like she had been run over by a truck. She was broken. Never in her life had she seen her sister in so much distress.
"Oh my god! Is it mom? If it's mom, why the hell is you ass her?" Jessica asked in a panic. Kristy shook her head no.
"What is it? What happened?" She questioned.
"Damn-it Kris, I can't help you if you don't tell me." She watched as Kristy face scrunched up and the tears began to fall.
"He- He cheated on me..." Kristy wailed as she fell into her sister's arms.
"Oh, Kris..." She said as she hugged her tightly. "I don't understand..." She said as she led her into the living room. "I thought you were getting a divorce..."
"I am..." She cried loudly.
"Well, then who cares? Just be glad that miserable asshole is out of your life!" Jessica said.
Jessica hated Derek. That seemed like a harsh word, but it was the truth. She did hate him. He and Kristy were married three years and she had seen him twice. At the wedding, and once an Christmas. He never came to any of the family functions. Kristy was always along. He was a miserable guy. A guy that seemed like you could never make him happy. And Jessica saw how Kristy tried with no avail. How she was as miserable as him now.
"It's not that... It was her... He cheated with her. Meredith, my best friend." She said as the tears rolled down her face and she buried her head.
"That whore!" Jessica said in shock. "Let's beat her ass!"
"No. No..." Kristy said in shock.
"No? She screwed your husband. She needs to suffer." Jessica said quickly. She was like that. Quick to fight. Quick to blame.
"She is. She is suffering." Kristy said as she stopped crying. "He got her pregnant. They didn't use protection apparently. Just one more thing to imagine."
"What? Now the whore is pregnant with his love child?" Jessica spat. "I'm not surprised. I always said he was an ass."
"She- It died. Their baby died!" Kristy said as she began to cry.
She should be mad. She should be angry. But at this point, she was more hurt than anything. And she still hurt for Meredith. She was so confused. She didn't know how to feel. Meredith was her best friend. She had been through so much. And she felt bad getting angry at her. But at the same time, how could she not? Everything was a lie.
"So your best friend screwed your husband? Got pregnant? And lost the baby?" Jessica asked.
"Yes." Kristy nodded.
"And you feel bad? How the hell did you find out?" Jessica asked.
"I saw him. I saw him crying and holding her at the hospital. If you... He's been happy. He's been happy for a couple of months. I have never seen him like that. Actually happy. And I caught him at a hotel with her. I didn't see her... But it had to have been her. I don't know what happened? They- The first time they met, she ran. He left right after her. Like he was chasing her. I knew it, but I pretended it was the hospital. They must have known each other then. The looks on their faces..." Kristy explained as she let the tears fall.
"He probably met her in a bar." Jessica said in a huff. "Took her home, and then they were shocked when they both knew you."
"He's happy. I couldn't do it... How did she?" Kristy asked sadly. "What is wrong with me?"
"Oh honey, nothing is wrong with you..." Jessica said as she hugged her.
"Why did she lie to me? Why didn't she tell me the truth?" Kristy asked. "I've lost everything..."
"Oh, Kris... I'm still here." Jessica said.
"I know. But my husband. My friend. And I don't know what to do." Kristy said quickly.
"What is there to do? It's over. You can't- Oh god, Kris! You aren't- You can't fix this!" Jessica said quickly.
"I hate them. I hate them so much. But I- I love them. I can't take this right now." Kristy explained.
"Well, I think we need to think of all kinds of evil things we can do to them..." Jessica said with a smile. "That always makes me feel better."
"That's your thing. I just... I just want to cry." Kristy said with a frown.
"Come, on... Let's go to bed." Jessica said as she led her sister to the guest bedroom and laid down with her.
"What kind of person sits across from their friend and lies to their face?" Kristy asked.
"A shitty one." Jessica said as she closed her eyes.
"It makes me sick. Him and her. I can't stop the thoughts. Him and her. They created a life. And I don't know how long it went on. But I can't get it out of my head!" Kristy cried. "At the bar... I knew. He was so quick to help her. So quick to talk to her. He smiled. I could tell. I have never seen him look that way at anyone. God! I can't take it!" She yelled.
"Calm down..." Jessica said softly.
"What do I do?" Kristy asked.
"You have to figure that one out on your own..." Jessica said with a frown. Kristy laid there and cried herself to sleep.
