Day 78

Long day. I guess that is one way to describe today … long. Wouldn't cover everything that has happened but I guess there isn't just one word for that.

The smell of smoke continues to permeate everything. I'd love to be able to get away from it, even for a few minutes, but it's everywhere; inside and out. It gets on your skin and in your hair and when you lay down at night it gets on the sheets and bedding … we just don't have enough water or time to wash as often and the way we would like. I know that sounds nasty, but it's true.

The smoke itself has dissipated in our immediate area but there are wisps of it here and there where there are still hot spots in the debris or things that are still smoldering. The flames stopped about three-quarters of a mile from us, just north of a road called Debuel on our side of the highway. On the other side, the west side, the fire line is about another half-mile north; starting right where the tree line is – or should I say used to be. The fire ran at an angle going NNW after the wind turned. The amount of black smoke on the horizon in that direction makes it seem like the fire is still burning. With no fire trucks or major geographic fire breaks to stop it, it might burn all the way to US19 and the Gulf of Mexico; coming somewhere between Safety Harbor and Spring Hill if it continues on its present course. The only thing that might stop it would be a major rain storm or some of the lakes in Pasco County. If it makes it passed these two obstacles then anything and everything in the fire's path is toast for who knows how many miles.

After a breakfast of Welsh Rarebit made with tomatoes from my patio containers, toast from bread made fresh yesterday, and a sauce primarily made up of powdered cheese, our two patrols went out. Dixon led the patrol that went to investigate the extent of the fire damage. He took McElroy and Rachel with him. Rachel is till coughing but she works well with Dix and they wanted a medic along in case they found any injured people. Matlock led a team over to Vandervort Road to check out Melody's story. Scott, David, and Cease went with him. Waleski remained at Sanctuary. Dante' was more mobile, but not enough to go on a Run, same for Junie. Dante' and Junie are both good eggs they just don't have the training (or maybe inclination) to command. They were both clerks in Federal offices before they were drafted by the NRSC. Dante' has found his niche in supplies and requisitions. Junie is a lot like McElroy; she's a Jill-of-all-trades but I'm still not sure what her specialty was before she was in the NRSC.

I thought James would be upset about not going with Scott but much to my surprise he was not. He takes guard duty extremely serious; he's turning into quite a marksman with both gun and compound bow. And he likes working with Waleski. I never would have thought it, Waleski doesn't honestly strike me as the type, but James said he likes serving under Waleski more than Dixon because Waleski explains things. Dixon just orders people about and expects them to do it. That might be OK with adults but it doesn't work as well with kids … especially teenagers. They need to know why, it's how they learn at that stage of their development.

Waleski assigned the gate to Dante' so he didn't have to be on his crutches all day. Samuel, Bo, and Tom were a team that walked the canal-facing fence sections. James alternated between what we have begun to call "The Wall" – made by the steel storage containers – and climbing into the branches of the Big Oak where he and Cease had built a type of "crow's nest" that acted as a look out post.

Rose, Josephine, Melody and I got a break from watching the kids. Becky, Tina, and Patricia took the younger kids except for Kitty whom I had in a sling on my back for most of the day. Sarah, Bekah, and Laura were assigned to help me in the garden when they weren't on kitchen duty. This gave them a break from babysitting their younger siblings as well.

You know, children are a blessing. They are literally our future. There is nothing more precious. You receive tenfold the amount of love and affection that you give them. But they are a huge responsibility. They can be a lot of work. Sometimes they can even be a lot of stress. It can also be scary as all get out having someone else's life in your hands like that. Whether well or sick, kids are almost totally dependent upon the adults in their lives. Sharing the responsibility of caring for the children only makes sense in our group. None of us has to become overwhelmed and the actual mothers can pass along skills to the women (and men) without.

Patricia had something snide to say about how "we women" were losing all of our hard won rights and liberation. I hope she doesn't infect Rose, Josephine or Melody with her skewed view of feminism. More than that, I hope she doesn't cause problems for the group. Not again; we've already got a pretty hefty load to bear.

As I worked with all of the girls in the garden I quietly reminded them that we still have equal say here in Sanctuary. But in some circumstances there can only be one "chief." I reminded them - and also introduced Melody to some of this info for the first time - that we all had areas where we were "chief" either by training and/or by talent. Coincidentally, most of these areas fell into traditional male/female rolls, but that was all it was; coincidence. I then explained to Melody about the trauma Patricia had endured.

"I saw a lot of that during the second round of riots," Melody said. "I was going to go into psychiatric nursing so they had me in the Lock-Down ward at the St. Joe Women's Hospital satellite facility. The treatment team said a lot of our patients were probably going to develop PTSD or some symptoms of it. Patricia's … um … behaviors may give her a sense of being in control that she needs to feel safe."

Samuel caught us talking when he rounded the corner to get to the out house. I felt embarrassed and guilty about being caught by the fourteen year old son of the subject we were gossiping about.

He must have understood the look on my face and before I could respond to his appearance he said, "No. That's OK. Mom's always been a little … Dad calls her 'strongly opinionated.' It's been worse since we had to move to Argos Hall and then to here. She used to be able to get all of that out of her system at work. She owned her own CPA firm you know. But she can't boss people around like she used to; I don't think she has figured that out all the way yet. And she keeps getting sick too."

"What do you mean sick, honey?" I asked.

"You know," he whispered to avoid having Patricia hear him sharing private details. "She pukes and stuff sometimes. And she's always tired. Dad says she's just stressed out and will get better again. All I know is she's really grumpy one second and crying the next. She was getting better but now she's acting kinda weird all over again. Please don't be mad at her. Dad's trying to get her to ease up. She's lots better when Dad can spend more time with her. She never liked it when he went on patrol. She really doesn't like it these days. I think it makes her feel scared, like the stuff at Argos is going to happen to her again."

"Sugar, were' not mad at her," I assured him. "We're just trying to understand."

That seemed to make him happy and relieved his mind but as he left all I could think was, "Oh … crap. Oh crap. Oh crap. Oh crap!" I don't think the girls picked up on it. Melody might with a little more prompting, but then again she's still settling in and her mind isn't in professional mode right now.

If you're not a woman those symptoms might not mean anything to you, but to me they spelled a potentially significant new situation for us to face. I didn't know whether to talk to Rachel or whether I should try and casually get Dixon thinking though I'm not sure the big lunkhead would get it unless I spelled it out to him. Stress … I swear that man must have some wires crossed somewhere. For now I'm keeping my suspicions to myself … but, oh crap.

Today was Tuesday so after the garden everyone sat down and started mending some of the clothes and socks in our respective family's laundry baskets. We've had to use markers to put names on the tags of everyone's clothing. The kids stuff gets mixed up if we don't. James and David both are terribly hard on their clothes. David has been pretty good about fixing his own clothing but lately he simply hasn't had the time. And Scott has holes in the toes in nearly all his socks. I've got to tell him he needs to trim his toenails and keep them trimmed. There aren't any new socks coming down the pike … only what we can gather while on our runs and not all of them are thick enough for wearing with boots. Tina and Becky have promised to teach anyone that wants to learn how to knit. Sarah and Bekah are both eager. I may have to take the time to learn as well; who knows, I may be knitting Scott's socks before all of this is over and done with; if it ever is all over and done with.

Speaking of knitting, crocheting, and sewing … we've got a nice little stash of yarns, embroidery floss, thread, material, etc. growing but I would like to see that become a priority at some point. Maybe not for a special trip but I'd love to get over to Dale Mabry and see if Michael's Craft Store still has anything in it. I wish … Oh well, wish in one had. You know the old saying. We've got a lot to do before we can make a Run out to Dale Mabry and by then it might be too late. As long as we're wishing I would like to add a treadle sewing machine to my wish list. I wish I had my great grandmother's that is sitting in my mom's sewing room … and that's about all I can think in that direction. It hurts too much.

Lunch for those of us still inside Sanctuary was Tang Tang Noodles made with crunchy peanut butter and Ramen noodles. OK, so I didn't feel like cooking … shoot me. I made enough for everyone; I just didn't feel like eating. I had too much on my mind. Instead of eating I sat and wrote in my memory book.

Dixon and his crew startled us by returning before everyone had finished eating lunch. We found out just how bad things looked. The destruction the fire has left in its wake is total. My guess is that any hope we had of gathering in that direction has been obliterated. There are still a few places this side of the fire, but not of the same interest as what we wanted to look for on the other side of Sunset Blvd. That whole Winn Dixie strip center is nothing but a shell. The whole intersection is simply gone. Even the road is melted in a couple of places; certainly all that new black top the county put down in the Spring is. The old concrete sections held up better but not by much. The patrol got as far as 1st Avenue, and still didn't find any survivors or anything worth the effort of salvaging it. The branch of the library up there was nothing but a foundation; the elementary school where I had hoped to get resources to teach the kids is gone as well.

As soon as they made the decision to turn back they heard it; the hum of another engine. They had already been sighted so there was no use running. They prepared to make a stand when someone stood up from the back of the truck and waived a white flag. Still cautious, Dixon said he decided to see what they wanted because they really did need more info about other groups in the area. Trading info cost us nothing but could gain us a whole lot.

It was a patrol from the big Pasco County enclave … only they don't call themselves the Pasco County Enclave. They call themselves Hale Hollow. "Hale" is from Hale Road which is apparently where their compound is. I wound up having to show the area to everyone on one of our local maps. Their perimeter suffered some scorching from the fire, they lost one storage building, and they had to evacuate their people. They evacuated not because of the fire but because of the zombies.

The train did derail right about where Scott and I thought it had. The train was too long and they were going too fast for the tracks and the area. Some of the rear cars derailed and then took most of the rest of the train with it. They had people packed in there like sardines. When the cars left the tracks most of the people inside them never stood a chance. The fire took more. The corpses that immediately reanimated took still more. Actually there were some survivors … too many for the Hale Hollow group alone to take in for any length of time. They were shy of places for about two dozen people. Another enclave, a splinter group from Hale Hollow, which was way out Ehren Cutoff near the cemetery, was willing to take most of them but if we could take at least one family that would help out everyone a lot. We had the room but Dix told them there had to be at least one or two able-bodied males that could be counted on take orders and help out with the extra work they would cause our group.

They said they'd talk it over and figure out who was willing to come. If we were still willing to take them we are to meet at noon tomorrow in the same location, barring zombies or natural disasters. Scott wasn't too happy with Dix for simply inviting strangers into our home. Yes, we have room for people in Sanctuary but our house is full up.

Speaking of Scott and the patrol group he was on ….

They returned a half hour after Dixon and his group came in. I thought that the house Melody had mentioned was a bust until Scott backed the trailer right up to one of the houses we had not begun rehabbing yet. David ran over and asked everyone that could to come help unload because they wanted to make at least one more Run before it got too dark.

Scott came around corner of the truck when he saw me walk up and handed me a big box. I should have known something was up. He had too much of a straight face on for the situation. As soon as he handed me the box something moved in it and started scuttling around. Well, of course I shrieked like a snake had bit me.

Those asses. They were just about rolling around on the ground howling in laughter. I could have strangled every one of them. James must have been in on it too 'cause he was laughing as hard as the rest of them. Before I could really lay into them I heard "peep, peep, scratch, peep." You would not believe it. They found an old broody hen and the chicks she had just hatched.

Scott laughed and said, "You better be happy with those things. That damn chicken just about pecked the hell out of every one of us before we could get her and her chicks in that box."

Humph. Everyone of them needed a good kick in the pants. But I suppose I'll let 'em off this once. I guess it was kind of funny … except my shriek drew a couple of zombies that then had to be sanitized. Not even that would stop those buffoons from snickering though. I swear … men!

I took my chicks and their momma over to the dog run. The holes in the fencing were too big and the chicks could pop through so I lined the sides of the cage and its gate with rabbit fencing and used wire to hold it in place. I took an igloo type dog house and put it in the dog run and some nesting material so Mrs. Broody could set her new home up to her convenience. Then I put in the stuff that Becky told me to use for chickens … little bit of the cracked corn, some grit, a little bit of fish meal. When the feed runs out from the Feed Depot we are going to have to free range the chickens. We'll have to see how this turns out. For now all I care about is making sure that I don't starve them to death. I'd love to let them roam around in the orange grove but that pretty much will guarantee some hawk depredation. I won't risk that until I absolutely have to.

By the time I had finished making sure the birds were tricked out in their new digs, the big trailer had been unloaded, the truck's fuel tanks refilled and they were ready to go again. Dixon's patrol grabbed the transport that hadn't seen much use lately and followed the F350 and trailer out the rear gate of Sanctuary. The only change that was made was that Waleski took McElroy's place because he had been up nearly 28 hours without a rest. While McElroy was winding down and making sure the perimeter guards were still good to go, he told me what he had heard from Scott.

When they had first gotten to the house that Melody had described they didn't think their chances were very good. The doors of the house were standing open and there were a couple of cars parked at the street. But then Scott noticed that there was moss and twigs on the top of the cars like they had been parked there for a while. They checked the cars and leaves had blown inside. Keeping an eye out they made their way to the house.

It didn't take long for them to figure out what had happened. A small group must have found the stash and gotten so excited that they forgot to post a look out. It only takes one zombie to create a panic in an unprepared group. Matlock and Scott sanitized two zombies almost as soon as they entered the house using the axes they had decided to start carrying around. Cease put another one down in a back bedroom using his own version of a machete. David took down a fourth one in the backyard using a homemade mace. All of the other corpses were non-reanimated ones that were already in the late stages of decay or they were too destroyed (you can read that as eaten if you have the stomach) to have re-animated in the first place.

McElroy confirmed that the supplies were from the NRSC and may even have been from the original robbery of the Forum in downtown Tampa that triggered the final series of riots that resulted in the Quarantine Order. I haven't had a chance to look at everything but McElroy said there is a lot more than MREs. There are a lot of super pails with whole grains and legumes and cases of #10 cans of freeze dried stuff. Matlock wants it all inventoried before we use anything however. I'm hoping this will allow me to keep some of our supplies in the hidden pantries for a just-in-case emergency.

Vandervort is about three miles from our house to the east. Scott said that very few of the houses over there look like they have been broken into which confirms what Melody said. It took two more runs with both the big trailer and the transport to get everything back to Sanctuary and they made it right before evening fell.

I had thought we would make plans to start gathering over in that area but that's when I found out about the new people. Before I could get flustered and stick my foot in my mouth, Dixon and Matlock stated that tonight will be the last night that we all stay together in the same house. Tomorrow the group is going to divide up and start moving into the other houses whether they are fully ready or not. I'm thankful but it will take some getting used to, having our house back to ourselves. I think Melody will probably stay with us a while longer though. Rose whispered that she is still shy of most everyone and doesn't want to go off and live with any of them or by herself. Scott says that's fine, Belle can room with the girls and we are putting Johnnie and Bubby into a room of their own and they can just share with Trent. Rose agreed to share her room with Melody.

And get this, day after tomorrow the plans are to start enlarging Sanctuary and making The Wall higher. Some zombies had begun to trail our trucks after they left Vandervort the second time. To try and lose them they came back home the long way … Vandervort to Hanna Rd to US 41 and back up to the end of our street, coming in the front gate instead of the back. I had forgotten about that warehouse that was back in there at the corner of Hanna Rd and some little gated community. Well it turns out it has a lot of those steel storage containers lined up in the field behind it. Matlock said he counted fifteen in each row and there were ten or twelve rows. That will be more than sufficient for what we need, especially considering those things are the longer sixteen foot containers rather than the shorter eight foot ones which what makes up most of The Wall now. They are also the harder steel shelled commercial containers rather than steel frame with aluminum shells that are what most of the Pods in The Wall are.

We'll still have to use cyclone fencing in some locations but hopefully not as many feet. We'll also need to take down some fencing and maybe even some sheds so that we can run The Wall where we want it to go. I hate having to re do so much work but if we can enclose the entire orange grove and add some addition houses that would be really great. We're definitely going to need more diesel to do it however. Matlock even had the answer for that. There was a tanker sitting at this warehouse as well. Apparently it was a shipping hub that we had known nothing about, I didn't have much cause to drive that direction. I mean the old trucking station had sat vacant and derelict at the corner of US41 and Sinclair Hills for years. I hadn't realized they were still in business but had simply moved the operation off of US41.

I hope that tanker is true-to-life and not an illusion. The tank behind the Feed Depot was nearly dry last time a Run was made that direction and the tank in the orange grove is less than three quarter full. We can't continue moving around like this without fuel. Eventually we'll have to really prioritize what the fuel is going to be used for.