*Thank-you for the reviews on the last chapter. THey were greatly appreciated. Thank-you all so much!*
"You like it," says Jay to me as he is towered over me. "You want it. You want me," he says slamming into me making me cry out in pain from his attack. My hands are over my head bound to the bed posts, my legs spread apart and bound to the other posts of the bed. Jay towers over me, naked, his erection slamming into me. "Say you want it," he says with malice in his voice. "Tell me you want it."
I turn my head away from him. I can't fight him, my wrists bleeding from the rope he has tied around them as I fight to break free. "No," I say through my tears.
"TELL ME YOU LIKE IT!" He strikes me before slamming deep into me feeling myself tearing from his thrusts. "I told you, Teagan, I told you I was going to break you again. I am going to make good on that promise. I am going to fuck you every day, all day, make you bleed and make you cry. You're mine. You'll always be mine and if I can't have you," he says aggressively before slamming into me again as I cry out in pain. "Look at me!" he demands before making another aggressive thrust. "Ahh," he says pounding deeper and harder into me. "I'm going to cum," he says before he releases himself deep inside of me as I cry from the pain feeling raw and sore. He pulls out of me and walks around the room as I lay crying in pain, feeling my skin tearing from my wrists as I continue to fight to get free. "You're mine, Teagan," he says, "you're always going to be mine and if not no one is going to have you," he says as he moves closer to me. "I am sorry I have to do this to you but I need to do this," he says as he grabs the pillow from the bed. "I'm sorry, Teagan," he says before he presses it against my face. I try to move my head if I can but he's holding the pillow so tight I can't move, my oxygen fading from me, pulling at my wrists and my ankles, trying to scream as my breath catches in my throat.
Flailing my arms, cold sweat dripping down my body, kicking my feet, I find myself gasping for air. "No, don't do this." I feel my breath leaving me as I feel myself thud against the floor.
"Teagan," says Joe as he appears beside me as I am sitting on the floor next to our bed fully awake damp in my own cold sweat. "What the hell just happened?" Trying to catch my breath before I can speak I just wrap my arms around him and he wraps his arms around me holding me tightly to his firm body. I don't want to let him go. I take in the smell of his skin, the smell of him, the smell that makes me feel safe. "It's okay," he says rubbing my back. "Talk to me, Teagan."
"It was. It was," I say trying to catch my breath through my heavy sobs. "It was Jay. He was.."
"He was what?" he asks.
"He was raping me. He was forcing me to have sex with him. It was hard. It hurt. I was bleeding from my wrists, he had me tied to the bed and then he put the pillow over my face. He tried to kill me. He said if he can't have me no one else can either. He's going to kill me, Joe, he's going to kill me," I say before I break down some more holding onto him tightly as he holds me as tight as he can.
"Shhh, Angel, it's okay, I'm here, he's not going to touch you. It was just a bad dream. You're safe with me you'll ALWAYS be safe with me. It's okay."
"No, Joe, he told me he will break me again. He said this isn't over."
"When did he say this to you?"
"Yesterday after court when he hugged me. He told me that it wasn't over and he can break me again. I'm scared, Joe, what if he does come after me? What if he does kill me?"
"He's not going to do anything to you because I have plans for Jay Richards. Look he has a lot of security to get through and then he has to get through me before he gets to you so if he survives that he's going to be nearly dead. Believe me, he's not getting to you at all and I'll make sure of that."
"But he has ways, Joe, he's crazy."
"I'm crazier," he says as he kisses the top of my head holding me. I am not sure how long we sit on the floor holding onto each other before we get back into the bed. I wrap my arms around Joe, clinging to him for dear life and never wanting to let him go. I close my eyes and fall asleep.
The nightmares continue through the night before I just stop going back to sleep. I toss and turn restlessly getting no sleep at all. I can't sleep not knowing that in a few hours that I will have to see Jay again and this time the custody of our children will be decided upon and the division of our assets. I don't really want anything just our kids. I hope the judge rules in my favor if not I don't know what to do. Jay's words about breaking me play in my mind. The way he said it was so promising. It wasn't a threat it was definitely a promise. He has broken me before. My nightmares were so vivid and real. I could feel the pain and I could feel the every thrust of Jay and not only him but his business associates. I could feel every injury he gave to me. I thought that when I would wake up I would be covered in bruises to my relief the only thing I woke up to when I got out of bed in the morning to feed Lucy my soft skin was left without marks but everything felt so real. I hate dreams like that.
"You had a rough night last night," says Joe as we are sitting outside the courtroom later in the morning to meet with the judge after a busy morning with the kids.
"It was a rough night. I kept having nightmares about Jay and they weren't very pleasant."
"I figured that," he says as he wraps his arm around my shoulders holding me close to him. "I wish that I could take them away but I can't. Have you ever had nightmares before?"
"Only when I am stressed I hope that after today they go away. I hate them, Joe. I really do."
"I know, Angel," he says, "I was tearing apart watching you fight in your sleep and kick. It was hard to watch. I tried to wake you but you wouldn't wake up but then when you did you were damp and emotional. Do you want to talk about them?"
"There isn't anything to talk about," I say. "They were just nightmares."
"You can talk to me about anything, Teagan, don't shut me out."
"Joe," I say, "It's better if you don't know about anymore that happened during my marriage with Jay and it's better you don't know about my life after you. I'm not proud of it."
"If you think that your past is going to push me away you're wrong. Obviously it's destroying you so maybe you should talk about it."
"Joe, some things are better left unsaid this is one of them," I say. "Please don't push this. Please."
"All right," he says as he kisses my temple. "Just know that whenever you're ready to talk you can talk to me about anything and everything. I will have no judgment."
"Okay," I say. I don't want him to know any more about my past with Jay and I don't' want him to know any more about my marriage with him. I don't want him to see me as broken and damaged because in all honesty that's all I am; broken and damaged. I hide it well. "I love you, Joe."
"I love you too, Tea," he says as he tightens his grip on me. "So I booked our reservations for this weekend. I hope you're ready."
"I'm always ready to spend time with you. Are you going to tell me where we're going or no?"
"No that's going to be a surprise."
"We aren't going to end up in Italy or somewhere like that are we?"
"For the weekend?" he asks, "no Italy is definitely a 2-3 week vacation. One week to fuck you senseless and the other two weeks to enjoy the country and go sightseeing."
"A week for sex? Your stamina impresses me, Mr. Reigns," I say with a smile.
"Wait till our three week honeymoon you better build up your stamina because that first week we are not leaving our hotel room at all," he says with a devilish gleam in his eye but his tone hot enough to make me want him right now.
"Hmm," I say with a smile. "I like the sound of that. I don't have to build up my stamina you make me an animal. I told you. No one can do me like you do."
"Good," he says before he kisses my lips softly.
"Ms. Richards," says Mr. Calaway.
"I prefer Ms. Madison," I say with a smile.
"Ms. Madison," he says with a smile. "They are ready."
"Thank-you," I say as I stand to my feet as Joe takes my hand as he stands with me.
He leans over and whispers into my ear, "don't get too used to Teagan Madison, you're going to be Mrs. Reigns sooner than you think."
"Am I now?" I ask. "I thought we decided on a year?"
"We'll see about that," he says as we walk into the courtroom.
Nervous is not the word for what was running through my body as the judge makes her way into the courtroom. I am overcome with fear; fear I have never experienced in my life. I feel sick to my stomach and feel as if I could throw up any moment. "Please be seated," she says. We take our seat as she pulls out the files. "It took me a long time to come to these decisions and I didn't do it lightly. I took the best interest of the children into play. I believe that the children despite what the father has done to the mother need to have a relationship with their father. Having a relationship with their father will help eliminate their fear of him from the things they have witnessed of their father with their mother. Mr. Richards seems to be a genuine caring father to his children. He has never verbally or physically abused the children so it is in my power to award both Jay Thomas Richards Jr. and Teagan Rose Richards joint custody of Serenity Richards and Lylah Richards. The children will reside with their mother and their father will have them from 6pm on Friday evening until 6pm Sunday night. They will also be with their father for two hours on Wednesday nights. This is not debatable this is the court ordered visitation and custody arrangements. Failure to comply will result in jail time." My heart sinks low into my stomach and I choke on a sob. I have to share custody with Jay and he gets our kids alone.
"Your honor," says Mr. Calaway. "May I say something?"
"What is it Mr. Calaway?" she asks.
"I have proof that Serenity Richards is not Jay Richards' child."
"By law since they were married when the child was born that makes Jay Richards her father."
"Not if there is a paternity test to prove that he is not the father," says Mr. Calaway. "We had a paternity test done on Serenity and she is not his child. I have the results right here."
"Bring them to me," says the judge. Mr. Calaway pulls out the paternity results on Serenity. A few days ago Joe and I decided to have a DNA test done on Serenity JUST in case this type of ruling should happen. This is the first time I am hearing the results myself so I am a bit shocked. I look at Joe as Mr. Calaway takes the results up to the judge. He smiles at me but I can't smile at him. I turn my head around and look down at the table as the judge looks over the results in that moment I know exactly who her father is and I have two choices tell him or not tell him. "This is very interesting. I'm sorry, Mr. Richards you have no rights to Serenity Richards unless Mrs. Richards gives permission. Mrs. Richards," she says, "would you like for Mr. Richards to still be a part of Serenity's life?"
"No," I say. I don't even have to think about it.
"Very well," she says, "the ruling on Lylah Richards stands, custody arrangements remain the same. Moving on," she says, "when it comes to the house Mr. Richards will keep ownership of the house while Mrs. Richards will receive half of Mr. Richards' earnings during the time of their marriage." My heart stops at the words half of his earnings. I can't even fathom how much that is. If my calculations are correct I would be entitled to half a million dollars. It seems about right and if not half at least a quarter million. "Anything purchased during the time of the marriage belongs to both of you. In the presence of an attorney you will divide the assets equally between the both of you. And finally when it comes to the restraining order I am granting it. I do believe that Mr. Richards is a threat to Teagan Richards. Mr. Richards is not allowed within 1,000 feet of Teagan, he is not allowed to contact her. A court appointed social worker will transport Lylah between the two parents and the social worker will be the communication between the two of you. If you violate the restraining order in any way Mr. Richards you will be fined and jail time will be an option. Are we clear?"
"We're clear," he says.
"Very good. You are dismissed," she says. I feel a flood of relief. I feel bad for Lylah and this is going to be hard to explain to her but the only thing I can do is follow the court's decision. I am glad there is a restraining order set into place but I know Jay. He's too smart if he wants to he will send someone else out to do his dirty work it doesn't necessarily need to be him. I guess in a way the restraining order is pretty pointless but if it keeps Jay away from me that's good. I am even more shocked by the Renny paternity results. That came as a shock. As many times as Jay and I had sex that January to conceive her I thought it was certain she was his but there were a couple guys that I slept with around that time but I know there is only one that could be her father. I just don't know if I want to tell him or let it go unknown. I don't' want to upset anyone because it has been almost 7 years. I know what I have to do. Then I think about the last 7 years of my life and just shake my head. I went through hell for nothing. I wish I had never found out.
"Are you okay?" asks Joe as we are sitting out front of our house while the girls play while he holds Lucy in his arms.
"Yeah I guess," I say as I look at Lucy and her beautiful blue eyes as she chews on her hand. "It just sucks knowing that after everything I went through with Jay was for nothing after finding out he's not Renny's father. That hurts more than anything. The last 7 years of my life didn't need to happen."
"I can imagine," he says, "but it's over now and you know the truth. I am sure it's devastating but at least you know it's over and he can't talk to you or come near you."
"He doesn't have to. You are forgetting who we are dealing with here," I say as Lucy starts to babble. "And what are you saying, Ladybug?" I ask as I tickle her. "She's doing so well."
"Yeah she is, and I know who we are dealing with. He's a coward. He doesn't get his hands dirty. I know."
"So if he wants to off me don't you think he would send someone else to do it?"
"I don't think he's going to off you unless he can do it himself and like I said he has a lot of people to get through before he gets to you."
"I guess," I say, "I don't know."
"Something is bothering you," he says, "is it the fact he isn't Renny's dad?"
"It's who her dad is that is bothering me."
"You know who he is?" he asks as Lucy starts to squirm and he adjusts her.
"Yes," I say, "I have a pretty good idea."
"Are you going to tell him?" he asks.
"I don't know. I would like to but it's been almost 7 years. What is the point now?"
"It was a one night stand thing right?"
"Yeah," I say. "It was a one night stand."
"So then don't tell him. I thought you didn't know his name?"
I let out a deep breath, "there were two other possibilities, Joe."
"I thought there was one, Teagan, you're getting me confused."
"One I used protection with the other I didn't," I say. "I know who it is."
"I would prefer you didn't tell him because that might just cause some issues but it's your choice. That's your daughter."
"I know," I say, "but you've been helping me with her and we're getting married so it's your decision too."
"I can't tell you what to do and not to do. That is your daughter. If you want her father to know about her then go for it if not then don't."
"All right," I say. "I love you, Joe you know that right?"
"Of course I know that. I love you too. We're going to be happy together. Everything is only going to get better from here. I promise. I am going to make you so happy. I'm going to give you the world, and Teagan I am going to show you what a real marriage should be like. You deserve nothing but the best and I am going to give it to you, Angel. But it looks like you came into some money."
"It's not about money, Joe. I don't' love you because you're rich. I loved you before anyone knew you. I loved you when you were just a kid in high school it was never about the money for me. I could care less. Just like this money you know what I am doing with it? I am putting it in the bank and using it for the kids to go to college with. I don't need that money and I don't want it but the court gave it to me. I want the kids to have it."
"I know you don't love me for my money. I know you're not like that and that's what I love about you. You could care less if I am rich or poor. You love me anyway."
"Damn right, Baby," I say with a smile. "Don't we have that business dinner with Gideon and his wife tonight?"
"I rescheduled that for next week. I figured that tonight you and I needed to spend time with the kids as a family. Besides Gideon had something else to do tonight we are meeting with them next Friday night for dinner."
"Okay good because I was not in the mood for a business dinner tonight."
"I bet. You should probably get some rest especially after last night. I am sure you didn't get much sleep."
"I didn't," I say as I think about something in my head. "Joe," I say after a couple minutes of silence.
"Yeah?" he asks.
"Hypothetically what would you do if Gina came back into your life and said you had another child with her but it had been a few years since she had the child what would you do?"
"I would be pretty pissed off. It would be wrong. I would be pretty pissed. I mean a few years of a child's life I should have known about it but that's never going to happen so I don't have to worry about it."
"But what if it did? Would you ever forgive her?"
"I haven't forgiven her for walking out on Sydney," he says with his voice even. "I surely wouldn't forgive her for that or anyone for that matter. I am not a coward, I am not a selfish bastard. I will own up to my responsibilities and take care of what I need to."
"Except when you decide it's better to abort the child than to have it," I say softly.
"Teagan, you and I both know that aborting that baby was the best thing at the time. We were 16 there was no way we could have done it. I regret it too but I still know it was the best thing at the time."
"Whatever, Joe," I say. "You surely didn't mind stepping up for Gina."
"Look, Teagan, it was different."
"How so?" I ask.
"Because I was 18 and she was 18 we were adults we were going to college. You and I were 16 if I had gotten you pregnant a couple years later of course I would have taken responsibility. I didn't have a job and neither did you. We did what we needed to do. I know it's hard and I'm sorry but it was the best thing at the time."
"I guess," I say. "I think I am going to go lay down for a little bit. I'm not feeling well. Are you okay with the kids?"
"Of course. I know it's been a long day. Go get some rest, Angel, everything is going to be all right. I promise and this weekend it will be you and I on a nice little getaway enjoying each other and spending time together putting everything behind us."
"Great," I say as I stand up. I make my way into the house and up to mine and Joe's bedroom. I lay down on the bed and grab onto my pillow as I let my emotions take over me and I let go. I break down into sobs, crying uncontrollably before exhaustion sets in and I fall asleep mid-sob.
*A/N: What did you think of Teagan's nightmare is she dreaming of the past or is she dreaming of the future? Or is it a mixture of both? What did you think of the judge's decision about the custody of the girls? What did you think of REnny not being Jay's child? Do you believe Teagan should tell her father about her or leave it alone? Is there a rift forming between Joe and Teagan? Do you think it has something to do with court or is there more to it? Please review and thank-you for reading.
