Chapter Fifty

Rikku opened the front door and smiled at what she found.

Paine was standing there clad in a pair of beige cargo pants and a white long sleeved v-neck with the sleeves rolled up. Her hair was still a little damp but looked great in its usual style. She was holding an obnoxiously large daisy in one hand and her shades in the other. "Are you ready? I told Lulu and Wakka we'd be there before eleven."

"Come in." Rikku stepped aside and then closed the door behind her. "I'm two thirds ready."

Paine handed her the large flower. Today was their nine month anniversary. "What does that mean?"

Rikku smiled and leaned forward to smell it and smiled even wider when the floral notes of spring registered. This was her favorite season and the weather was finally starting to change for the better. "It means all the major stuff is out of the way."

Paine nodded and looked around. "Your Dad isn't home right?" She wanted to avoid any and all talk of Rikku's drinking episode.

"Mhm, he went to the country club with Uncle B and Leblanc today."

"How the other half lives…." Paine took off her shoes. "Here, I'll put this in water and you finish the one third of the way getting ready," Rikku hesitated before parting with the larger flower. "You like it?"

She nodded. "Yellow is my favorite color."

Paine smiled. "I know, happy anniversary."

Rikku reached for Paine's hand and gave it a squeeze before leaning toward Paine and meeting her half way in a tender kiss. It didn't last long because it didn't need to. "Nine months is a long time, you tired of me yet?" Rikku asked as she began to climb the stairs to the second floor. She looked down at Paine from where she stood.

Paine shrugged. "No."

Rikku only smiled before making it to her room and working on deciding on one of her spring time dresses to wear and putting her things into a tote. Today they were going to an outside music festival in Central Park with the D'Autry clan. Rikku found it both amusing and lovely that somehow they were creating this little family unit. She knew Paine was excited about it but remained calm and slightly indifferent on the surface for whatever reason, Vidina had replaced Rikku as Paine's background on her phone which was proof enough that she was taking this family thing with stride. Rikku didn't mind though, the thought of Paine going to the gym every morning and opening her locker was good enough for the blonde. Plus Vidina was way cuter than she was, she could openly admit that.

Rikku decided on a checkered red and white sundress. It was an amazing 70 degrees today and she wasn't going to pass up the opportunity when a cold front was on its way.

"You won't be cold in that?" Paine asked when Rikku got into the passenger seat of her car with all her things.

"No, and I brought a sweater too so…."

Paine nodded and buckled her seatbelt before looking for her sunglasses. Her eyes weren't as light sensitive as Rikku's green eyes were, but they would be driving directly in its rays and that was just annoying. "Baby have you seen my shades?" She began to look around for them.

"I saw you come in with them."

"Yeah well…" Paine sighed and felt under her driver's seat. "Can you check the glove compartment?"

Rikku popped it open and pushed a few things around. "You really need to clean in here and…" Her brows furrowed when she found a pack of cigarettes half way smoked. She looked over at Paine. "What is this?"

Paine cursed herself for not taking those out sooner. "What?"

"This Paine this, what are you smoking now or something?"

"I've always smoked."

"You have not."

She had, but never habitually. This was the same half pack she had smoked before going to meet Keira that one day.

"If I go out or something y'know if I am stressed… Look Gippal gave those to me when I wasn't taking the medication."

"Gippal gave these to you?" Rikku asked carefully. Paine looked as guilty as could be right now and if she weren't so concerned she'd laugh. "Let's call him then."

"What! Why? I'm an adult."

"Who has a mess of health problems that I'm sure smoking would make worse. Shiva, Pai."

"That one guy started smoking at twelve and lived like till he was a hundred and two."

"Which one guy?"

"That one guy, Rikku."

Rikku laughed. "The guy on the stop smoking commercials? That guy Paine? Who had to speak with a voice box thingy?"

"A TEP."

"A what?"

Paine sighed, "a tracheoesophageal puncture" Rikku just stared at her. Paine pointed to herself. "Physical Therapy."

"Oh so you actually know what you are doing then is what you're telling me?"

"Yeah."

"Well at least you won't have to hire someone to teach you how to speak all over again." Rikku put the pack back into her bag to throw out later and Paine laughed a little.

"Not we?" Rikku shook her head. "Tracheowhosit's are not sexy, sorry."

"Damn."

"Maybe you left them in the house?"

"What?"

"Your sunglasses."

Paine nodded, she could see them sitting on the kitchen counter and everything. "Mm, Can I grab Little Puppy?" Paine put her hand out and Rikku gave her the house keys and watched as Paine hopped out of the car and went to the door. She came back a minute later on her cell phone but wearing her sunglasses. Rikku grinned; her girlfriend could really pass for a celebrity in those things. They just fit her so well.

"That's what I was fucking saying…mhm." Paine got into the car and handed Rikku back her keys. "You wanna maybe check it out?...Yeah…." She buckled her seatbelt and started the car. "When? Nah I have work…no the other work….Sunday though let's check it out then….Oh…" Paine lowered her voice a little. "Well I mean what is she saying?... Alright, yeah, look Rikku and I are going to see Wakka and dem so I'll see you later at the house…I don't know…bye." She glanced at Rikku. "Gip." She explained.

"You don't have to tell me that, Pai."

Paine nodded and looked to the front for a second before looking back at Rikku. She shook her head at something and put her keys into the car and turned them. The car revved up and loud music took control of the cars bearings. Paine reached to lower it and then glanced at Rikku. "Sorry."

"I don't know how you drive with it that loud." Rikku nodded as she reached for her cell phone to text Yuna. "What band is this anyway?" She recognized it from a few times of being in Paine's car.

"Metric." Paine shrugged as she drove onto the main road. "So is your dad still upset with you?"

Rikku shrugged. "He says he's not mad he's disappointed….bleh."

Paine chuckled. "Yeah well he'll get over it soon enough."

"Yunie is the one who is in trouble."

"Really? Yuna in trouble?"

"I know right? She doesn't care though, with the whole Tidus thing bogging her down she just shrugs Uncle B off."

"So Tidus wasn't at work because of midterms, and then he was only there for a couple hours this week when I was there, we were both busy so we couldn't really talk."

"Do you guys talk ever?" Rikku glanced at Paine.

"Sometimes."

"Hm."

"Was going to invite him to my first show…y'know?" Paine glanced at Rikku now. "Bad idea?"

Rikku sighed. "I mean as Yunie's ride or die.."

Paine laughed. "Where'd you learn that?"

"On TV."

"Figures."

"But yeah, I would say no don't do it but… as me, as Rikku? I think you should. He has been your friend and you've known him longer than all of us. It would be nice to have him there for you. I also think it would force them to see how stupid they are acting."

"I don't wanna push them though."

"You're not."

Paine seemed conflicted as she pulled up to a red light. "I don't know…"

"Think about it."

"Would you warn Yuna if I invited him?"

"Should I?"

Paine shrugged. "Do what you have to do babe."

"All I have to do is show up looking pretty."

"Won't be too hard to accomplish." Paine smiled a little and then looked back to the road as the light turned green.

"Aw." Rikku smiled at the little bit of pink at the top of Paine's cheeks. "You should invite Keira."Paine laughed. "No I'm f'real."

"No." She shook her head "No."

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because you're nervous? If you think about this is how she found you in the first place remember?"

"Yea bu—" "

And you went to see her perform."

"Unknowing that she was my mother Rikku."

"Yeah but—"

"No I'm gonna do this my way okay?" Paine glanced at her. "We started emailing and that's—"

"Safe."

"Yeah, I like safe okay? She gave me away."

"Are you still with that?"

"It's a big fucking deal."

"It will always be a big deal until you really refuse to let it be one." Rikku turned in her seat. "Listen to me Pypo." Paine sighed and gave Rikku a sideways look. "The ball is in your court…now you can either continue emailing her until I don't know, or you invite her to this, thus extending an olive branch. You don't even have to talk to her. I'll make sure she doesn't bother you."

"I'm nervous enough as it is."

Rikku smiled. "How tall are those heels anyway?"

"Too tall." Paine groaned,

Rikku giggled. "Decide for yourself. I'm sure there will be other shows for you cause your sexy, but the first one holds some meaning y'know? You're offering a certain authenticity."

"Thanks, Martha."

Rikku smiled and rubbed Paine's arm before looking back to her phone. "Yunie says hi."

"Mhm." Paine nodded in thought as she drove.

##

"So meddma zammopayh! Kuuthacc muug yd druca lraagc uh oui!"

Vidina was squealing with happiness at Rikku's enthusiasm, he even spit up a little. "re!"

Rikku jumped up and looked to Paine who was wearing a very amused expression. "Holy crap he just said hi to me!"

Lulu laughed and exchanged a look with Paine. "Babe I think he was just making a noise…babies do that…"

Rikku shook her head at the nonbelievers and turned back to Vidina in his stroller and leaned down to take his little hand. "Fryd yna fa kuehk du tu fedr dras?" Vidina made a little spit bubble and Rikku nodded. "Aqyldmo."

"So Wakka couldn't make it?" Paine asked as Rikku took control of the stroller and started pushing Vidina along. They had just arrived at the large park in the middle of the city and it was turning out to be the perfect day for an outing like this. Lulu and Rikku were even wearing hats. Somehow Paine missed that memo but it was okay.

Lulu hiked the stylish diaper bag onto her shoulder that she had just pulled from her car. "He got called to the sphere to sign some papers. To stop from spreading rumors they have the players on call. He was upset that he couldn't come but really it won't be the first time and that's just what he's getting into."

"Yeah, when the team travels and stuff."

"Mhm." Lulu nodded and watched Rikku stop and turn to face the stroller to fix something on Vidina before standing and pushing him along. "How are things…?"

Paine shrugged. "Better."

"Last I heard you were going through something."

"When am I not?" Paine ran a hand through her hair.

"With Rikku Milan."

"Oh."Paine nodded. "Yeah we um…talked it out."

"Good." Paine glanced at her then back at Rikku a ways away from them. "She told you?"

Lulu gave her this look and Paine sighed. "Rikku comes to me for a lot of things; it's always been that way, Paine."

"Yeah well, I guess we are working on things more openly if that makes sense."

"It makes perfect sense. How are things with your mother?"

Paine made a noise. "How are things with your mother?" Lulu made the same noise and they both internally smiled. "Father though…he's called." Paine nodded. "I think I am going to let him meet Vidina, I haven't spoken to Wakka yet but…" She realized the conversation had stopped there and decided to pry a little. "Do you just not want to meet him, Paine?"

Paine shrugged. "Why when he doesn't even want to know me?" Paine had a few choice words for Paul Moore, but the more she thought about it the more she realized he wasn't worth her time. "At least Keira tried…Rikku thinks I should invite her to my first show."

"I think that's a nice idea."

"Nice?"

"Well it is ultimately up to you isn't it?" Lulu motioned to her engagement ring. "This doesn't mean that my concerns are mute." She motioned to Rikku pointing at some bird to Vidina. "There is a way to maintain self even while you are not quite whole without someone else." Lulu was quiet for a moment. "As is the current problem with Tidus and Yuna."

Paine thought about it and glanced at Lulu again. "I just wanna make her happy. If she wanted me to rob a bank I'd do it."

Lulu smiled. "I'd tell Wakka to rob it himself." Paine had to laugh a little at the mental image of big ol' Wakka putting on all black and running to a bank guns blazing. "Though there is nothing wrong with that, I think it's important to realize that she wants the exact same of you. Be you and for some reason she'll be happy. I don't quite understand why."

"Yeah well I tried to talk Wakka out of asking to marry him like a hundred times."

Lulu found herself smiling.

Rikku stopped at a bench to wait up for Lulu and Paine. She smiled at the sight of them. Had they realized they were strolling and not walking at a full pace? She watched as Lulu openly laughed at something Paine was saying. It made her notice their similarities more seeing them standing so close. They both used their right hand to talk and not their left. Paine had this little hoppy domineer and Lulu had this annoyed older sister look about her but it was obvious they were joking about something. Paine was taller, but not by much, and of course Lulu's raven hair favored her mother's as opposed to the smoky quality of Keira's.

Rikku looked down to Vidina in his little stroller and noticed that he was watching the duo as well. "Aunty Pai and Mommy." Rikku explained in Common. He looked up at her and gripped the air in front of her nose causing Rikku to laugh a little and point to herself. "Aun…" Her smile dropped a little and she didn't know why but she just felt real sad all of a sudden.

"Hey Rikks." Paine called as they got closer. "You wanna go find a spot to lay up? Maybe by the music in the grass?"

Rikku nodded and stood "Yeah, we were just taking a little break." She smiled at Lulu. "What are you feeding this kid? He weighs a ton."

##

Rikku looked to her right where Paine was laid on the grass beside her with her hands under her head. "Pai." Rikku whispered.

Paine turned to look at her. "This is nice huh?" Paine asked. The music turned out to be this jazzy funk band. She would have to look them up and make a CD when she got home. There was just something about the nice breeze and the jumpy beat that calmed her. The warm sun did help a bit too. "You think Viddy is enjoying it?" Paine asked and Rikku nodded with a smile.

"Let's have a baby." Paine groaned and Rikku laughed.

"Every time you see him you want a baby."

"We could bring him or her to the park and everything. Bayla Bayla baby." They both chuckled as Rikku leaned up on her elbows to talk down to Paine. Lulu had wheeled Vidina away to a public restroom not too far away to change his diaper leaving the two to lounge in the grass. "C'monnnn." Rikku begged cutely.

Paine smiled up at her. "Stop."

"Why?"

"Cause when you make that face I can't say no to you."

"So don't." Rikku pouted cutely.

Paine leaned up a little and stole a kiss from Rikku causing the blonde to blush. "Babies aren't always cute."

"Ours would be!" Rikku defended playfully tapping Paine on the arm.

"Yeah but we… can't have one."

Rikku pouted. "I want a little you."

Paine blushed heavily. "Babe c'mon…" Rikku loved making her feel squirmy it wasn't even funny. "We're not even y'know…married or anything."

Rikku laughed lightly at Paine's blush. "We don't have to be to have a baby."

"You're Al Bhed though…"

Rikku tilted her head. "So?"

"You're dad would kill me." Rikku laughed a little louder at the look on her face. "We can elope!"

Paine raised her brows at Rikku. "You're really trying to get me killed."

"Nooo, I'm tryin' to y'know." Rikku winked at her.

"You can have a baby if you want."

"Wha? What about us."

Paine shrugged "you'd still be my girlfriend I guess…"

"You guess!" Rikku laughed and playfully tapped Paine again. "Little Puppy has turned to drugs y'know because you're not an active par—" Rikku's features dropped at the look on Paine's face. "Paine I didn't—"

Paine looked away for a second before looking back up at Rikku. "That's exactly why we can't."

"Stop it."

"No you stop it okay?" Paine sat up and put her hands to rub her temples and her face.

Rikku sat there and wondered what had just happened. She reached a hand to Paine's shoulder and frowned when she tensed. Rikku moved closer to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled a soft smile out just for Paine. "You're perfect….perfect, and I want all of you, even the parts you don't want anymore." Rikku motioned to Paine's chest where her heart was. "Anyone would be lucky to get any part of you."

Paine looked up at her and Rikku was surprised at how bright her eyes were before being surprised again by Paine leaning forward to claim her lips. Rikku shook at how Paine was kissing her. She wrapped her arms around her neck quickly and exhaled heavily when Paine pulled away. "Can we just wait a little longer? I mean I'm not even out of school and—" Paine was cut off by Rikku kissing her this time.

"I love you." Rikku whispered when she was able to speak next. Paine was just too cute for words; Rikku could kiss her all day just because of that simple fact alone. Paine was about to say something when a shadow overcast them both. She looked up to see an unfamiliar woman wearing a visor and chewing gum.

"Excuse me this is a family day outing."

"So?' Paine asked. "Who the fuck are you?"

The woman seemed put off. "My children are sitting right over there and I don't think this type of display is appropriate for—"

"How 'bout you mind your own business, how about that?" Paine rolled her eyes. She glanced at Rikku who looked like she was going to apologize.

"Look ma'am, we weren't trying to do anything it—" Rikku began.

"I don't care what you people do in the privacy of your own homes—" Paine turned to look back up at her.

"You people?"

Rude

"Yes, you…gays." The woman whispered.

Paine raised an eyebrow at her whisper. "You're too ignorant to get upset over." She shook her head. "I'm gonna kiss my girlfriend whenever I feel like it, so if you and your husband and your two and a half kids feel uncomfortable well then you can suck my nonexistent—"

"Paine!" Rikku gave her a look and then looked back to the woman. "I don't know what you wanted to accomplish by coming over here so you might as well just leave."

"Is there a problem here?" Lulu asked noticing the looks on Paine and Rikku's faces. The woman turned to Lulu a little relived to see that she was pushing a stroller with a baby in it.

"Maybe you have the same concern as I do."

Lulu glanced at the duo sitting close and then back at the woman. "Maybe."

"I think we should really do something about people like them being in a park with children."

"Al Bhed?" Lulu questioned trying to figure out what the issue was.

The woman seemed offended. "I am very accepting of the Al Bhed, I mean that people like…"

"Dykes." Paine clarified from where she sat. Lulu seemed a little confused and then got it.

"Oh, you mean my sister and her girlfriend?" The woman seemed taken aback. "Why um I didn't know.."

"That's right, you don't know. So I would appreciate it if you would go back to wherever you came from and try and enjoy the day without hyperventilating every time you see two people in love, it really isn't necessary." The woman wondered off and Lulu shook her head at her. "Her husband probably cheats on her."

Rikku laughed at that even though she wasn't in a laughing mood. "Ai Lulu."

Lulu shrugged and took Vidina out of his stroller and sat down with him. "Paine?" Paine glanced at her. "Forget it." Paine just nodded and went back to enjoying the music.

##

The day had finally come to the end when Vidina fell asleep and showed no signs of waking anytime soon. It was around four in the afternoon when this happened. Rikku was helping Lulu break down the stroller and get Vidina's infant seat situated while Paine held him waiting. When Rikku motioned that the infant seat was ready Paine carefully put him in it and buckled him in before standing upright. Rikku leaned in to give him a little kiss on the forehead.

"I'll see you two soon I'm sure." Lulu said goodbye.

Rikku nodded and grabbed hold of Paine's hand to wave bye. Once Lulu was off the two headed for the area where Paine parked early that day. "So are you still thinking about that lady?" Rikku asked as the made it to the dark blue two door.

"No."

"Well why are you so quiet?"

"Trying to think of somewhere to go eat. Are you hungry?" Rikku nodded. "Okay well…" Paine unlocked the car with her keys and went back to thinking.

"I'm still thinking about that lady." Rikku admitted.

Paine shrugged as she put her cell phone into the cup holder with her spare change. "Don't."

"She doesn't even know us and we were like having a moment and I really wanted to y'know tell you stuff but she just ruined all of it. Why is it okay for her to come up to people like that? I mean she's accepting that I'm Al Bhed but not that I'm in love? fryd pimmcred." Rikku buckled her seatbelt.

Paine raised an eyebrow but let it be. Rikku had a right to be upset. "But other than that it was a nice day right? I really liked that band."

Rikku sighed and nodded. "Heylady."She knew Paine was just trying to get her mind off of it.

"Was that the name? I gotta remember it." Paine nodded. "Alright but what about food. I'm hungry."

Rikku checked her phone for the time. "Um….I'll make dinner."

"You don't want to go out?" Paine asked a little surprised. Usually Rikku liked to go out.

"We can still go out."

"But you don't want to eat out…."

"No."

"Okay well what are you going to make?" Paine started on the route back to Rikku's house.

"Ummm, fish and brown rice and…what?" Rikku laughed at the look on Paine's face.

"I don't feel like having fish…and the brown rice takes too long."

"Well what do you want me to make?"

"I can make grilled cheese!" Paine got really excited about the idea.

"Grilled cheese?"

"Yeah." "That's a lunch food."

"Not if we make a salad with it."

Rikku laughed a little."Okay I'll make the salad."

##

Paine searched the littered ground to find her jeans. "I just don't want to move to fast." She explained as she continued her search. Really how far could they have gone? She noticed Rikku's red and white sundress on the ground and found her own panties which she slipped into before continuing her search.

Rikku yawned from where she lay completely exhausted. "Mhm, but what do you guys talk about? Can I ask?"

"Can I turn a light on or something—"

Rikku hid under the covers. "Noooo"

Paine chuckled. "I can't find my pants."

"You don't need them where you're going." Rikku flirted. She was tired yes, but that didn't mean she couldn't exploit her beautiful girlfriend who was walking around her room in nothing but a pair of black panties.

Paine reached down to grab some denim but sighed when she realized it was a pair of Rikku's jeans. "My medication is in my pocket."

Rikku frowned a little. "They're by the desk."

Paine nodded but then froze and gave Rikku a look. "You knew where they were the whole time?"

"I took them off you didn't I?"

Paine laughed to herself and went over to Rikku's small desk. She reached a hand into the front pocket of her jeans and pulled out a little container with a divider she got from the Rin Pharmacy near her house. She put one of the pills under her tongue and walked over to the tall glass of water on Rikku's nightstand and swallowed it. She wouldn't need the melatonin to help her sleep tonight. Paine was sure she'd find sleep just fine. After that she placed the cup down and searched the floor again for a shirt.

"C'mon lay down." Rikku nodded.

Paine grinned lightly and got into bed with her. "My boobs are cold though."

"Come closer I'll warm them up for you and stuffs."

Paine laughed but scooted closer. "You're too much."

Rikku smiled and wrapped an arm around Paine's flat stomach. "Continue."

Paine leaned down and kissed her once before sighing and trying to figure out where she left off. "We don't really say anything too important just…we just talk. She had her last show during midterm's week and is going to audition for a new role for the spring production, she's nervous about it."

"What do you tell her?"

"I told her about how I start this new job soon; I didn't say it was modeling. I told her about school…"

"Do you feel like you are getting anywhere with the conversation?"

"I didn't know I was supposed to get somewhere."

"Well I mean do you feel as if you are learning about her, and she you."

"We just talk babe."

"Surface stuff." Rikku nodded.

"I don't know how to change that or…should I talk about Martha? I mean I haven't seen her well cause I skipped my last two sessions…"

"Yeah about that."

"Well the week before last I was still studying all weekend, and last weekend I was trying to fix things with you…"

"You still need to go Paine. What happens when you leave school and it's no longer justified through the courts to pay for it?" Paine shrugged. "Just something to think about."

"I know."

"At least invite her to get coffee or something if you don't feel comfortable about the show."

"I'm still thinking about it. How's your grandma?"

Rikku seemed a little surprised. "You remembered?"

"Just that you were worried about her."

"Oh well, I spoke to her the other day and she sounds better, you know when older people get colds you think it's really the end."

Paine chuckled a little. "Yeah I guess I can understand that, that's good she's feeling better."

"I really want you to meet her."

"As what?"

"As you silly"

"As me as your girlfriend or as me as you're good friend….which by the way from what you told me about this lady I don't think she'll buy that story."

Rikku smiled. "Probably not, Pops is talking about doing vacation soon and Yunie and I have to talk to Brother to think of a location. I wanna go back Home I had so much fun when I was there over the break and I really think you'd like it."

"I don't know babe."

"Timing?"

"Yeah. I gotta look at places next week and decide on somewhere so they can hold my spot for May."

"So soon. Gosh time is going by real fast."

Paine smiled and put her hand on Rikku's. "Don't be nervous."

"I'm trying not to be but damn y'know? Yunie and I submitted a butt load of applications for fall term and I think I can get in with Uncle B and do some work for him during the summer, but…"

"That's good, you can save up."

"Yeah. It all just seems so real now. We're not little kids anymore….Pypo?"

"Hm?"

"So like to Vidina, what am I?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well Yunie is his god mother and Teedus and Datto are his god daddies. You're his aunt…"

"You're his aunt too Rikku, what else would you be? His cousin?"

Rikku laughed a little. "I was just thinking today."

"You're his aunt, everyone knows it."

"I was missin—"

Paine's cell phone buzzing loudly cut Rikku off. Paine ignored it for a second or two before Rikku nodded for her to get it. "It's Gip." Paine nodded as she picked it up. "Paine...right this second?...I'm at Rikku's…..yeah it's not far but…uhuh, okay man… no I'm coming just hang tight….bye." She hung up and tuned to Rikku. "I gotta go get Gippal."

"Go and get him? Where is he?" Rikku noticed there was a certain no questions asked policy Paine and Gippal lived on; if one of them needed the other that was that. They were best friends so Rikku could understand, but there was still so much about the two that she had yet to understand. She didn't want to step on toes, so she didn't ask.

"Some place not too far from here actually. I'm gonna drop him home and then come back..I mean if you want me to."

Rikku nodded as she watched Paine get out of bed and slip her jeans on. "Yeah of course."

Paine put her shirt on over her bra and grabbed her leather jacket and phone before sitting on the edge of the bed to put on her socks. "You gonna fall asleep?" She asked noticing just how tired Rikku looked.

"I'll wait up."

"No no, sleep. I can come in and not wake you."

"I wanna make sure you're safe…" "I'm just driving him home Rikks."

"I know but I worry. It's late."

"Alright I'll wake you when I get back." Paine leaned over and gave Rikku a kiss. "Maybe." Rikku laughed a little. "You know what? I want you just like this when I come back."

"Sleepy and cold?"

"No," Paine got up and checked her pockets for everything before heading towards the door. "Naked."

##

Paine got into her car with a small smile on her face. She was in love bad and she couldn't help it at all. Rikku was just Rikku and that was all Paine knew she could ever need. With a little sigh she started her car and drove through the silent rich neighborhood that had almost become somewhat normal scenery to her. She thought about moving and getting a job as a personal trainer by day and maybe a night PT at the twenty four hour rehabilitation center she had found in the city. At least for the summer so she could save some money for rent if something happened. Paine always liked to have a backup, but she really wanted this living on her own thing to work out. She could have a drawer for Rikku's things that were taking over her closet at her current place. She could invite the guys over…Lulu and Wakka.. Paine nodded to herself as she made list after list of things that she needed to do.

Keizer was a little shit hole tucked away by fancy boutiques in the upper west side. Not many people knew about it, but it was basically the Mecca for debauchery for the upper class New Lucan who was looking for a thrill. Whatever you were into, there was a way to find it. Paine had only been there once before with Gippal and it was what it was. They had scored a month's worth of oxy from some brat with a broken arm before getting in Gippal old beat up truck and going back where they belonged. That was a long time ago though. Paine just wanted to pull up, have him jump in and be on her way. It was the first time ever that she considered it late to be out like this. Maybe it was just Rikku rubbing off on her.

"Yo I'm here across the street." Paine said once Gippal picked up. She hung up when he said he was on his way up. Was it just her or did he sound way off? Paine supposed it was whatever he smoked, but that was a discussion for another time. She leaned back in her seat and stretched her legs a little while blindly shifting through stations on the radio. Today had been a long day and Paine wanted nothing more than to get back into bed with her naked girlfriend and sleep until noon. She already knew that wasn't going to happen though. Tomorrow was yoga with Yuna in the morning and then she was going to go with Baralai to check out a weapons expo in south Luca. It was about a two and a half hour drive all together which wasn't bad, but she figured they'd be there all day. Then she needed to go home and help Mackenzie with her homework and do her own while Joyce picked up a quickie night shift.

Busy busy busy….

Paine looked up to the passenger door when Gippal opened it. "Finally." She mumbled before putting her car in drive and pressing her foot down on the break. "What are you…?" She paused when she realized Gippal was picking up the seat for someone to get into the back, that someone just happened to be Dona Pilgrim. Gippal didn't say anything; he didn't need to, one look at Dona ghostly gray eyes told Paine everything she needed to know, but that didn't make it okay. She glared at Gippal after he put the zombie in her backseat. "What the fuck Gip?"

Gippal got into the car and motioned to Dona as he put on his seatbelt. "I didn't show up with her and I damn sure as hell didn't want to leave with her."

"So explain to me what the fuck she is doing in my backseat."

"Just start driving." Gippal glanced at the alley where the entrance to Keizer was. Paine watched him look behind them warily.

"Whas a matter Dr. P, not happy to see me?"

"Shut up." Paine growled as she accelerated. She looked at Gippal. "You and I need to have a conversation."

Gippal sighed heavily."Listen she was strung over with some guys that are trying to take over Bart's territory, you really think I should have left her there?"

"I don't give a fuck man that's her choice, she wasn't high when she got there and started talking to them am I right?"

"So you wanted me to leave her there?" Paine didn't say anything. Gippal raised an eyebrow a little surprised at her. Paine glanced at the rare view mirror at a person she swore she knew at some point in time. It's just that right now she didn't know when that time was. She was so gone right now that it was scary. Her eyes were bright gray, her limbs limp, her attractive smirk nonexistent.

Was that how she used to look too? Were they like that together?

She hadn't been around someone as high as Dona was right now since she OD'd two years ago. It made her skin crawl with the feeling of lost withdraws, with the want and the hate all in one. Paine focused on the yellow lines on the road and then stopped when she felt like she was going to crash if she didn't look ahead of her at some point. In the back seat Dona made a noise.

"Can you tell her to shut up or something? Fuck." Paine put a hand to her head as if in pain. It was like a fever, and all of a sudden she was sweaty.

"Are you o—"

"How could you do this?"

Gippal sat up a little. "You didn't have to—"

"Bullishit Gippal you know I would never leave you."

"I didn't take any—"

"Tonight you didn't, tonight, but the other nights…You're just like that…" Paine glanced back at the zombie in the backseat.

"Whoa Dr. P calm down a second." She looked like she was hyperventilating.

Paine began to breathe heavily and darted her gaze everywhere before finding a spot to pull her car over and get out. She dropped to her knees on the curb and threw up a grilled cheese sandwich and the half she split with Rikku.

Gippal glanced at Dona in the back. They had met in the sixth grade, she was a shy little sister and Bart was her protective older brother. She was quiet like Paine was, and she had yet to lose her parents and her innocence behind the drugs. Gippal always wondered the role he played in the two of them starting to use. He had always wondered if maybe things would have turned out differently if he had not been Paine's friend. Maybe if he were a better friend.

Gippal opened the glove compartment and pulled out a few napkins before getting out of the car and kneeling down beside her.

##

"So you sure you can't make it?" Baralai asked as he got into his car. He nodded. "Alright well I'm sure there will be other ones…. Feel better, bye." Paine hung up her phone and stared at the ceiling in her room. She hadn't gotten out of bed yet and didn't think she was about to. Her room door knocked and she cleared her throat. "What?"

"It's me."

Paine sighed. "Come in."

"Paine?" Rikku asked sounding more worried now that she was actually able to see the state her girlfriend was in. Paine had come back the night, slept for a few hours and then said she was going home. It was four in the evening now and Rikku hadn't heard from her girlfriend at all, but she did receive a text from Gippal saying she should probably come over and do some damage control. He had been very tight lipped about why Paine was in a mood. Rikku knew it probably had to do with whatever happened when she picked him up.

Her room was a mess.

The shades were drawn so the room was relatively dark. There were clothes and random papers from Paine's desk all over the floor, books were overturned, and her nightstand was on the floor save for the crystal picture frame she got for Christmas. It was like a hurricane came through here. Her girlfriend was lying in bed on her side facing the wall in a modified fetal position. "Pai what's wrong?" Rikku quickly stepped into the room.

"Close the door?" Elma had tried to push her way in to check on her twice already.

Rikku closed the door gently and went over to sit on the edge of the bed. "Have you been in here all day? What's wrong? Please tell me." She leaned herself onto Paine's side to get a good look at her face which was somewhat hidden by the hair she hadn't styled yet for the day and her pillow. Paine winced a little and Rikku took some of her weight off her side. "Are you still in pain?" She brought her hand to Paine's back and pulled down her blanket and picked up her shirt a little to see the scar. It was a little red as if Paine had been itching it again.

Paine pulled her blanket back up over her. "Stop babe." She mumbled.

Rikku grew even more concerned. "Pypo.."

"I drove Dona home last night."

Rikku sat up. "I thought you were getting Gippal."

"He brought her with him."

Rikku tried to swallow the anxiety she was suddenly feeling. "And…?"

"And she was high on meth." Paine turned onto her back to look at Rikku. Her eyes were a little puffy and her usually clear face was slightly rosy in color. "I feel so sick."

Rikku caressed Paine's left cheek. "Okay."

"I didn't…y'know..I didn't—"

"I know you didn't." Rikku tilted her head a little. "You're strong Pai, it'll be okay."

"I don't feel so strong right now, Ri."

"But that's okay cause I'm right here." Rikku leaned over to Paine's small nightstand and shuffled through the top drawer until she found a hardened tube. "Turn over." Paine sighed but did as she was told. Rikku lifted her shirt and opened the tube to squirt an inch worth of the antiseptic gel onto her finger before gently applying it to the red area. She put the tube back in Paine's nightstand and then got up from the bed and took survey of the room. Paine watched as Rikku began to pick up the room. The books she knocked over in her anger, the clothes she threw the closest, the empty medicine bottle that had turned out all the little white pills across her desk surface. Rikku heard Paine getting out of bed and when she glanced over at her she was picking up a textbook. Rikku nodded to herself and caught her gaze before going back to slipping all the little white pills into the orange prescription container; secretly counting them as she went along.

##

"Wow."

Rikku nodded.

"Is she feeling better now?" Yuna asked as she poked a fork into her salad.

"Sounds like quite the weekend."

Rikku nodded again. "It made me realize just how far we still had to go…"

"Yevon, I could only imagine."

"These things just don't go away…anyway yeah she's feeling like her normal self again which is good. How are um… things?" Rikku took a bite of her sandwich.

Yuna offered her cousin a small smile. "Things as in Tidus?"

"Well y'know since you brought it up." Rikku said with a mouth full of food.

Yuna laughed a little but then just said nothing. "Did we decide on a place yet? For vacation?"

Rikku frowned. "Yunie…"

"I don't want to talk about him anymore, Rikku." They shared an understanding exchange of silence before Rikku put her sandwich down.

"Well Home is where I always want to go."

"I don't know, I was thinking Guadosalam."

"Ugh Yunie that place is depressing, and not to mention too close to The Plaines."

"So you're never going to visit there again? C'mon they have such a rich culture."

"So does Bikanel!"

"I either have to get you on my side or Kirill to win, you know that right? Majority rules."

Rikku laughed. "It's a shame people think you're so nice."

Yuna smiled. "isn't it?"

"Ladies."

Yuna looked up quickly and her face dropped a little. "Oh, hey Baralai."

Rikku frowned a little but then looked up to see Paine was with him. "Pypooo." She whispered happily as Paine came to sit beside her.

"Hey Rikks."

"How's it going?" Rikku asked her. Paine only nodded.

"What are you guys talking about?" Baralai asked as he took the only other open seat beside Yuna.

"Vacation plans for part of the summer." Yuna nodded quickly gaining her composure."Thoughts?"

##

"He's gained two pounds."

Wakka and Lulu exchanged pleased looks. "Dat's good ya?" Wakka asked just to make sure as he watched the pediatrician take a cranky Vidina off the cold scale.

"That's very good for a preemie of his size. It means little Vidina Mateo is thriving." Lulu nodded. "Good good." Wakka stood to accept his son. "Lil' champ." He cooed as Vidina calmed down a little at his father's warmth. Wakka sat back down beside Lulu. "Um so…his lungs look good now?"

"We've been noticing he sleeps the whole night now and he's very alert when awake, mental capacity was one thing that we were told to look out for…" Lulu glanced at her son and then the doctor who had been taking care of Vidina since he was born.

"Well sleeping all night is excellent, and he does seem to have a little personality. His lungs are adjusting well. Does he recognize faces other than Lulu's?"

"Well he knows me." Wakka nodded and then looked to Lulu. "What about Datto?…He knows Datto too. Yuna…" Lulu nodded. "Paine and Rikku, the other day at the park you should have seen how his face lit up when they came over."

The doctor nodded. "Well it sounds like he has his own little village already." She looked at Vidina's chart. "I would say that we should continue to just be aware, he's in a very impressionable age and that can be good or bad. Are you still breast feeding Lulu?" Lulu nodded. "Yes." "Good, so make sure that your diet is rich in nutrients for him…" She flipped his chart closed and leaned over to shake Vidina's little hand. "I'll see you in two weeks little guy."

"Say Bye." Wakka laughed when Vidina moved his lips and the puckered them a little.

"Lulu Dr. Leon will be in shortly to check on you. You three take care."

Once the new parents were left alone they took a breath of relief "His stuff came out real good Lu."

Lulu nodded. "You sound surprised."

"I was just worried ya? I mean…" Wakka looked down at his son. "He's perfect how he is y'know, that's what I think but if dey say something was really wrong then I don't know what I would do." He looked back up at Lulu.

"I know, what you mean. I was really worried for him, for us."

"How 'bout you?" Wakka asked gently. "You still…sad?"

"I don't know how I feel."

"Maybe we should ask the doctors about post partum—"

"I'm not depressed, Wakka."

Wakka nodded quickly. "Okay so den tell me, everything is coming together, I signed the papers so we'll have money in the bank by Friday, Viddy is healthy…I mean…what else?"

"I supposed I just never thought my life would be like this." She admitted looking back at him. "I love you, and our son, and the fact that I still get to do what I love…It's just that."Lulu shrugged again."Do you ever feel as though something is missing?"

"Wit my parents and brudda?"

"Yes."

Wakka was quiet for a long time, Vidina's baby noises taking up the silence. "Yeah but… I have a family, and it might not look like everyone else's, but I got one y'know, and so do you."

"I just can't understand how they could act so…."

"Cold?"

"And selective." Lulu nodded while looking at him. There was really no one else who knew her as well as Wakka did. Sometimes it was scary or annoying, right now it was just right. "Paine feels like he doesn't care, I know he does though."

"Is it your fault though?" Wakka adjusted Vidina in his arms. "No. You and her are working things out ya? I couldn't be happier cause I've known you both and I know you both need that type of friendship….but it ain't your fault that they don't think like you. Feel lucky."

Lulu smiled at him. "Not just brawn."

Wakka chuckled and leaned back in his chair."Can I ask dem that question?"

Lulu laughed. "No." "Ay but Lu—"

"Wakka if you ask you won't get the chance to see just how well I've been healing."

Wakka laughed more and bounced Vidina in his arms a little. "How 'bout it buddy? You want a little sister or what?"

##

The front door opened and Dona seemed a little surprised. "What do you want?"

Gippal Trent stood there wearing long dark blue jeans and a white shirt and a gray jacket. He looked a mess and his usually clean shaven face was prickly with a dark blonde stubble. He put his hands into his pockets.

"We need to talk."

Swirly green met deep gray.

"I don't want to talk to you anymore."

"Please." Gippal took a step forward.

##

Paine sat down and rested her fingers on the ivory.

Her last class had been canceled.

At least this was her excuse…

She had known about this place since her first day at NLU when she was drawn in by the melodic tones coming from a petite music major sitting on stage playing for an empty crowd. Paine had to admit to having a little crush on the bare footed piano player back then. But she never saw her more than three times before she hadn't seen her again. The judo fighter supposed she graduated by now, but in graduating she left her secret spot and this was Paine's first time to actually to take advantage of it. She glanced up at the seats before her. It was dark, and so was the stage save for small backdrop lights. She found that she didn't need much light anyway. Paine stretched her fingers out and rolled from octave to octave on her right hand.

The keys were heavier than she remembered.

##

Rikku sighed and leaned on her elbow in the library as she scrolled down the on the computer screen.

There is nothing you can do to "help" them stay sober…

Rikku shook her head and opened a new link.

Withdrawal from Oxycotton can be very unpleasant but rarely fatal. Addicts will experience muscle and bone pain, insomnia, restlessness, nausea and vomiting, sweating, involuntary muscle twitches, dry mouth…

Rikku wiped at her face and opened a new link.

It is not uncommon for Oxycotton addicts to relapse after treatment, so it is important for everyone concerned, the patient, family and friends, to understand this reality. Sometimes it takes more than one attempt. Sometimes it takes several attempts…

She sat back in her seat and pulled out her cell phone.

##

Paine stopped playing and took up her phone from the seat she was sitting on.

I love you

She smiled before responding.

I love you too, Rikku

Promise?

Paine's smile fell and she scratched the back of her head before responding.

With all my heart, Princess

We need to talk

Whatever it takes

Rikku wiped at her eyes again and nodded at the response before closing all the windows on the library computer and gathered her things. What did these people know about Paine Kerrigan anyway?

##

"Now Mr. Trent you do realize that you are willingly signing these forms. Correct? Forms that take away your rights?"

Why is this pen so heavy?

Gippal nodded. "Yeah…"

The nurse standing beside him patted his arm. "Welcome."

AN: Fast Update thanks to your wonderful reviews. Keep 'em coming!There will be more Keira Paine interaction coming soon I promise :)

KathleenDee