Chapter: 052 – Trail.
Location: Agrabah
Characters: Xaldin, Xigbar
Rating/Warnings: G.
Summary: Snooping about is a bad habit. Recon, on the other hand, is manly business for the bold. And Xigbar.
Author's note: This week, instead of one long chapter, you'll get two short ones. Enjoy your mid-week snark. :)
Chapter 052 : Agrabah – Trail.
The blazing sun stood high in the sky, heat mercilessly slamming down between the endless dunes.
The light flickered and mirages solidified into two black shapes, from the looks of it continuing an argument about heat, light and sand in unmentionable places that had already been going on for quite some time.
When they reached the city walls, one of the shapes raised a hand to shade its eyes, then turned towards its shorter companion.
"Tell me again why exactly we are here."
The skinnier of the two raised its hands to lower the cowl of its black coat and absently fanned himself.
"Rumor. Some people around here have seen people in black, hooded leather coats skulking about. That sound fishy to you?"
"Hm. So someone's out doing unauthorized fieldwork on their own."
"Maybe."
The taller figure turned to his companion and lowered his own hood to give the grizzled man a questioning look.
"Maybe? What else?"
A furtive shrug.
"Call it a hunch."
The Lancer actually groaned, a hand pressed over his eyes.
"Would this be an 'I found this rad mushroom and now I keep having these brilliant ideas' sort of hunch, or more of the 'I just totally accidentally happened to overhear this conversation and now I can't help but think' kind?"
Xigbar barked a short, amused laugh.
"More the latter than the sooner, if you must know. We won't find anything hanging out here, though, Let's do some recon."
Passing the city gates to the busy market beyond the two gave the place a look of professional assessment.
"Ripe," Xaldin commented, taking in the filth and poverty lurking in the shadows. Pilfering a handful of dried dates from behind a suspiciously glaring vendor by means of a tiny, well-aimed dark portal, Xigbar nodded.
"Steady supply of hearts. It's a good world. You wouldn't believe some of the things munny can buy you here."
Xaldin shook his head with a resigned air.
"Probably not, although I'm sure you do. So what are we looking for, more precisely? According to your hunch."
Munching on a sweet date, Xigbar shrugged vaguely.
"Not sure. I guess we'll know it when we see it. Anything out of the ordinary."
Xaldin gave the bazaar and its abundance of enchanted objects, rope-charming flute players, swashbuckling street-rat heroes and the occasional monster a dubious look.
"In this place?"
"Hey, look!" Xigbar happily exclaimed, elbowing him, "I see tits!"
Faced with plenty of scantily dressed women, it took Xaldin a moment to realize the shorter Nobody was pointing at a small group of low-level Heartless lurking on a roof.
"They've adapted nicely," he conceded. "Good desert camouflage on the Bandits. The little ones weren't always on fire either, were they?"
"Nope. My hunch is liking this."
There was something particularly unpleasant about Xigbar's smile when he slipped through a portal to emerge on the roof on top of the Heartless. Frowning, Xaldin followed.
"So you found burning Heartless. If you dragged me out here just to collect samples for your practical jokes, Xigbar..."
The Freeshooter gave him a whimsical wave even as he leaned forward to give the gaggle of Heartless a closer look. With blank, yellow eyes, they looked back.
"Tell me, compadre, what is wrong with this picture."
"Aside from me being in it?" Xaldin snapped sarcastically. "You know I have more important things to do than rousing Heartless. Demyx can rouse Heartless."
Xigbar shook his head, still grinning.
"Give him a break, he's a good kid. And you're losing your touch. Look closer."
Xaldin crossed his arms and glared at the Heartless. A few ruddy Luna Bandits, and about equal parts of the burning and unlit bomb-like whatever-they-were-called. And...
"Ice-cubes?" he asked out loud.
"Ice-cubes! In the desert!" Xigbar crowed triumphantly.
"Alright, that is out of the ordinary. I still don't see where you're going with this."
Xigbar flung an arm around his shoulder, making a sweeping gesture with his other hand. That he had to float several feet above the rooftop to do so didn't even seem to register.
"Scenario: Oblivion. Our guys, their guys. Showdown, big boom, collateral damage all around. Bad news for us, huh? But. Ponder for a moment not everyone kicked the bucket. Maybe some little scaredycats slipped away."
Xaldin stared blankly at the other Nobody for several long moments.
"You did eat that mushroom, didn't you."
Xigbar shook his head impatiently.
"Okay, the cubes are a far stretch. But Roxas found something in Twilight Town. I heard Big Boss tell him to keep quiet about it for now, until slobbery watchdog had sniffed it out. And then I heard Xemnas talking to Saïx."
"You've really accidentally stumbled into a lot of private conversations lately, haven't you?"
One yellow eye, unusually serious, sought his own.
"Maybe it's nothing. But Roxas and Fido both whispering about Axel - and now these guys?"
A sweeping gesture towards the restless little fireballs.
"Direct contact with an Organization member would definitely be enough to trigger the ICTIT5. Look at them! Fire and ice."
Xaldin narrowed his eyes.
"You think Vexen is in on whatever it is, too? But that makes no sense. Had Vexen survived Oblivion he would have run straight home, not... gone here."
Xigbar frowned and chewed on his lower lip.
"Hm. Okay. It does seem unlikely."
Pushing his braids back over his shoulder, Xaldin shook his head.
"This place has a lot of background magic. Anything could have triggered the Heartless, you know how volatile that gene is."
Xigbar's frown deepened.
"Still doesn't explain why people here claim to have seen Organization lookalikes loitering around here."
He'd almost forgotten about that.
"Hm."
"We should at least snoop around some more. Can't stand the thought of the lapdog knowing about something I don't."
"One of these days you're going to have to learn to admit you're wrong, Xigbar."
The other Nobody grinned at him.
"On that far-off day when it happens, maybe."
"Please. 'No, I swear, Cruella is totally a Princess of Heart!'..?"
Xigbar gave him a wounded look.
"That was just a spur of the moment thought after one too many tequilas, dude."
"Still wrong."
"Technically, perhaps."
"Technically counts. Let's go back. The sun is giving me a headache, and I've got work to do. You, too. If something's going on we should know about, Xemnas will tell us, I'm sure."
Xigbar looked cross.
"You know I hate waiting around."
"Then there's this new thing you can try out. Called honest work. Ever heard of it?"
He grinned evilly and almost dodged the well-aimed punch going for his shoulder.
Xigbar looked around at the brightly sunlit city, and shook his head.
"I still say something fishy is going on. Saïx was smiling this morning. He never smiles!"
Xaldin sighed.
"How about we just get you a nice tinfoil hat, and maybe then you can almost pose as a normal, well-adjusted member of society."
"Your mom."
The Lancer resignedly shook his head and reached out for the Darkness to shape a portal back home, when a hand on his arm interrupted him.
"Xaldin?"
Even for Xigbar the soft voice was smug. He turned around.
They stood in silence for a few seconds.
"Darkness on a stick," Xaldin muttered as the green Bandits waved their pink scythe-like scimitars at him.
"There'll be no end to the trouble now."
