Chapter Forty-Nine: I Just Believe In the Enemy…
Drake's POV

I wanted to go home.

Where home was, I wasn't entirely sure. For the past three to four months, my home had been the palace. More specifically, it had been with Pharaoh as his lover, but clearly that wasn't the case anymore. I wasn't his lover, I was a copy of his original lover. Alexander, the boy that Adam was really in love with. I was just a skin for Adam to put Alexander's ghost into. A shell for a man who was dead…

So that left me with going back to my family. My mother and my little siblings. That was my second home, but I had no idea how to get there from the palace. The day Adam's guards had taken me from them, the route to the palace was so confusing, I couldn't remember it even if I tried. And since I was brought to the palace, the furthest I had been from it was the bizarre, which was less than a half mile away. I didn't know my way around the city at all. I would probably get myself hopelessly lost if I tried to go back to my family.

Not to mention, Adam had a couple of guards staying with them to make sure they were safe. Ever since Anna died, they had been protecting my family until we found who murdered my little girl…If they found out I had run away, they would contact Adam immediately and I would have no hopes of getting away from him…

Part of me didn't want to be away from him. I loved him. But, at the same time, I realized that he did not love me the way he claimed to. If I remained at the palace with him, he would slowly strip me of everything that made me Drake and he would mold me into everything Alexander had been. He didn't see me, even though he should have. He would never see me. Perhaps Brad had been right all along. I only wished Brad would have told me sooner…

What the fuck are you saying, Drake?! Are you even listening to yourself?! That's pathetic and you know it! Maybe Brad wasn't right at all… Maybe he had made everything up or he exaggerated it greatly. Was I a fool to listen to him in the first place? Probably. Then should I go back to the palace? I wanted to, but I didn't. I kept walking away from the massive building, glancing back at it every now and again. Before I had gotten too far away, I could see dozens of people rushing back and forth between all of the windows. I wondered what was going on. Perhaps Adam had already discovered I was gone and he had people out looking for me. If that was the case, I had to keep moving before they started looking outside of the palace.

I couldn't go back… Not to a place that held nothing for me. There was no love in that place. Not for me. It only held the ghost of Alexander's memory. That was all Adam would ever care about…

My hips burned as I walked through the market place. It was deserted due to the lateness of the hour. No merchants sat in their little stands trying to sell to anyone who walked by, nor where there any customers to be seen. There was absolutely no one. That was good news for me, actually. No one would be able to see me from the palace thanks to the cover of all the stands, and no one would be able to recognize me out here. All I had to do was get a decent distant away from the palace before people came out to look for me.

If they came out to look for me.

Tears stung my eyes and with every step I took, my heart cracked a little more. I painted a moving picture behind my eyelids. Alexander's statue reigning down around me but the statue was slowly turning a crimson color, morphing its way from a peacock, to my heart. Just as that statue had crumbled, my heart was crumbling. Every step away from the palace hurt, but the one time I turned around to go back, ever step towards the palace, and towards Adam, hurt ten fold.

By the time I reached the back side of the abandoned market place, I could hardly even see in front of me. It was extremely dark, yes, but I couldn't see because of the tears blurring everything in my line of sight. I wanted to stop sobbing and be strong, but I couldn't. Adam had ripped my heart out of my chest and given it to Alexander, as if that would bring the dead beauty back to life, killing me in the vain process.

I wanted to scream and shout instead of cry, but I couldn't even bring myself to do that. I was too afraid of drawing attention to myself. I couldn't go back… I just couldn't live with a man who didn't love me after he swore up and down that he did. I gave him everything and he just threw it away like it meant nothing. Maybe I was just a poor farm boy but I had feelings! My heart did matter… And just because he was the Pharaoh of all Egypt did not give him the right to place some sick, fucked up game with people's emotions. He was supposed to be the good guy, not another Brad!

That was a little bit on the harsh side, don't you think, Drake? No, I don't think so… He might even be worse than Brad, in his own way. At least Bradley didn't make people believe that they were the most important thing in the world just to show them that what they really loved about you was the face of a dead person. Brad showed his true colors from the beginning. Adam? Adam lied and hid them until someone else exposed him…

The Egyptian heat was starting to die, and very quickly, just like my heart. Chills washed over me in the inky blackness of the night. I was shivering, wishing for some clothing that covered up more than what I was wearing. As a pleasure servants, most of my clothing consisted of shorts, and not just any shorts, but shorts that only covered about half of my thighs, and I was freezing. Egypt may have been blistering hot in the day time, with temperatures of one-hundred thirty degrees, but at night, it was bitterly cold without some sort of shelter.

I would need to find a place to stay for the night and, if possible, find some clothing that would hide more of my body. Not just for warmth at night, but for cover during the day so it wouldn't be so easy for people to recognize me. I had a little but of money stashed in my bag left over from several shopping trips, but it wouldn't be enough to pay for somewhere to stay, clothing and food. I had to be smart about what I used the money on and I had to barter for the rest of the things I needed.

Tonight, a room was definitely in order, however. I was too scarcely clad to be walking around in such cold weather. I would get sick in no time if I tried to stay out all night. In the morning, I could find some sort of clothing and then a place to stay at night would not be nearly the necessity it was tonight.

I glanced back at the palace, realizing that it was extremely hard to make out now. I wondered just how long I had been walking, lost in my own thoughts and my own grief. I had to be at least three miles away, if not more than that. I was in the richer parts of the city, I realized. This was the area that aristocrats lived and tourists came to visit. There were many hotels throughout this part of the city because it was such a big money pool, considering all the people that came to visit Egypt. This was the nicer part of the city but in easy distance of the pyramids and the bizarre.

There was absolutely no way I had enough money to stay in one of these hotels, but I knew I needed to find somewhere to sleep tonight. It was too cold for me to be out in such a skimpy amount of clothing. I clenched my bag tightly to my chest as I walked to the closest hotel, entering the lobby. What I was about to do did not please me in the least, but I didn't really see any other option for myself. I needed to stay warm tonight so I didn't drop from fever…

Though part of me wished to die… No Drake, do not start thinking like that…

The lobby of the hotel was made from the same stones used throughout the palace. There were many hieroglyphs painted onto the surface of the walls. Some of them were talking about hospitality, I realized, but I didn't stare at them for too long. I was just wasting time.

"Is there something I can help you with?" a man said from behind me. I turned to the wall adjacent from the entry wall to see a young man with thick, blond hair and tanned skin sitting behind a stone desk. There was a wall of old fashioned keys behind him, about half of the hooks actually empty of their keys. Good, there were still rooms left…

"Well, actually… I need a room…" I whispered, walking over to the desk to get a better look at the man. He was, if I had to guess, about the same age as Tommy. He was lean, with a similar build to Cassidy but a few inches taller, I would have assumed, if he was standing. He had pale green eyes and a soft, comforting smile. Alright, perfect, he seemed to be a nice guy. Easily manipulated…

Fuck Drake, what the hell has happened to you?! I hated feeling like I was using someone, but if Adam hadn't repeatedly manipulated me, I wouldn't even be here! "Well, we've got a bunch vacant. What kind would you like?" he asked me. I frowned, wondering how best to go about this.

"I… just need a place to sleep. It doesn't have to be fancy or anything, just somewhere to get out of the cold, but I'm terribly afraid that I have very little money…" I whispered, putting on a mask of pure pathetic-ness.

The man bit his lip, looking into my eyes before looking away. "I really can't give you a room unless you pay for it… The cheapest room we have is about-" I cut in, making myself seem even more pathetic, if that were possible.

"Please… my daddy sold me to this man and he…" I bit my lip, hating myself with every single word. If it was true, I wouldn't have felt bad about it at all, but since it was all one big, fat lie, I felt horrible. "He hurts me and I just… I can't stay with him anymore. I know he's… out looking for me right now and if he finds me," a tear rolled down my cheek as Adam's face painted itself into my mind. I reached out, putting a gentle hand over the older man's. "Please don't make me go back out there… I'll do anything I have to…" I really hoped he didn't take me up on that offer because I was really fucking tired of spreading my legs for people. To spread my legs for someone just to get what I wanted? Well that made me feel even worse. I felt… dirty, like I truly was a whore…

His green eyes filled with sympathy and he glanced towards the entrance of the hotel. "I…" He bit his lip, looking back into my eyes. Tears were hanging at the rims of my bright blue eyes. His stared at me for a while before looking down at my hand holding his. I gently started drawing gentle circles into his hand, grasping it tightly in my hand.

"Please… just tell me what you want and I'll do it…" I whispered. I felt like I needed to bathe, but I didn't let up. "Please…" I pleaded. He sighed, squeezing my hand gently.

"I'll give you a room. You don't have to do anything for me…" he whispered. Thank Ra… "I don't want to see anything bad happen to such a beautiful young man such as yourself." He turned, taking a key from the middle of the wall. "I would never dream of taking advantage of someone so in need…"

He stood up, walking around the front of the desk to stand beside me. My suspicions on his height were completely spot on. "Thank you… You are a… very honorable man," I whispered. He smiled, blushing lightly. The man was attractive, but not drop dead gorgeous. People who were more attractive than him probably didn't give him the time of day. Not that I was conceited or anything. It just became common knowledge to me, considering I was always turning heads back at the palace. I had even turned the Pharaoh's head…

"Let me take you to your room," he offered, holding out his hand to me. I took it gratefully and let him lead me up to the third floor of the building. The stone used in the lobby, as well as the hieroglyphs remained throughout the space. He lead me down to the last door of the wall and he unlocked it for me. "Please do not tell anyone I let you stay here. I could…. Get in a lot of trouble for it…" he whispered, his eyes pleading with mine.

I nodded, smiling softly. "I won't tell a soul, I promise," I said, leaning up on my toes to press a kiss to his cheek. His blush deepened and it was strange to have this sort of… power over someone. It felt wrong, but I was desperate. He pushed the door open and handed me the key.

"I hope this will suit your needs," he whispered and turned to walk back down the hall. "Good night," he added and I looked over my shoulder at him.

"Night…" I whispered. I watched as he disappeared down the hall. I felt bad for using him but at least he was kind. An honorable man… He didn't use me when I offered my services to him. Anyone else would have and I had to admire him for that. He was so kind and I felt like, after everything I had been through, that he was exactly the kind of person I needed to meet to give me some sort of hope. Some will to keep moving forward…

Sighing, I walked into the room. It was small but extremely cozy. A rather nice, large bed sat in the center of the east wall. Across from the bed were a couple of windows that had a view of the market and the palace in the distance. Off to the north the pyramids could be seen. Over all, it was a beautiful view, but I pulled the curtains shut almost immediately. I didn't want to look at my old home any more than I actually had to… I closed the door that lead to the hall, locking it before I tossed my bad and my key onto the bed. I needed to bathe. I felt disgusting for what I had just done. For the entire day, actually…

Being with Brad for no more than ten minutes, for listening to everything he said to me. Running through the halls of the palace and shoving so many people out of my way before I tripped and scrapped my knees up. They were still burning from that and I knew I needed to get the scraps cleaned out as well. All the more reason to take a bath. But what made me feel the most filthy, even more than destroying that statue, was letting Adam ever touch me. I should have know that he would never care about me the way he claimed to. I should have known from day one that he was trouble…

He was a snake. Beautiful and fluid in motion, but cunning and backstabbing. He used me for his own selfish reasons and, in the process, he made me fall in love with him. He made me care about him more than anyone else in the world. More than my mother, more than my little siblings, more than Tommy… More than Anna… I gave him everything I had to offer and he just took it from me. He took advantage of me like the man in the lobby refused to. Adam was dishonorable. He was horrible… I hated him.

But that wasn't true either. I didn't hate Adam in the slightest, although I wished to. I would always love Adam, I realized. I could never make my heart stop loving him. He didn't deserve my love, but he still owned it. I had never been in love before he brought me to his palace, and now I wished dearly that I still had not fallen in love. I wished he sent me to work on the pyramids. I wished I was still a virgin… But I wasn't. Not anymore. He stole that from me and, in the process, he turned me into his whore!

Brad had been right the entire time. Ever since his abuse started. I was nothing more than a whore with a pretty face. I spread my legs so easily for the Pharaoh and even for Tommy. Perhaps it would have been wiser of me to open them for Brad. Perhaps his abuse would not have been so horrible if I realized then that I was a whore… Look at what I did to that man in the lobby! I acted like a whore to get what I needed from him. If I acted like one, then I was one…

I turned the water on, letting the tub fill up as I stripped. Tears were spilling down my cheeks again. I wondered if they would ever stop. As I slipped into the tub, I momentarily thought about pushing myself under and staying there until I was no longer able to move, but if I killed myself, I would just go to the Afterlife, where Alexander was. I did not want that… I never wanted to face that man.

Ra, why was I so pathetic? Why did Adam do this to me?